Transitions by Mike Hormek - HTML preview

Chapter 3

It was getting close to ordination when Bob spent time at a retreat. On the ride back, the bus had an open seat next to his Archbishop, a sort of rotating spot where he could share whatever was on his heart. It was to be a 10-minute talk, but he spoke with the Archbishop for an hour, unloading his difficulties about the priesthood. Bob spent the summer before his senior year at The Cedar Catholic Camp, a summer camp in Louisiana. There, Bob helped the counselors teach children.

Bob told the Archbishop he was struck at camp by the joy of the camp directors in their marriages. He saw the happiness in their relationships with their wives and children.

"Your Excellency, coming back from the camp, I felt like I had a better grasp on my heart and had the question of discernment lodged in me from The Cedars because I saw beautiful relationships there. That experience of The Cedars, mixed with the concerns I already have, makes me uneasy about a final decision at this time," he told the Archbishop.

The Archbishop hesitated and said, "if you have any doubts about the priesthood, take your time before making your final decision."

Bob felt uneasy before his ordination. His friends and family had already secured airline tickets and made room reservations, and doubts crossed his mind.

Bob called his Dad, whom he was able to talk to frequently. His mother, not so much.

"Dad, I can't continue like this," he finally admitted the words hanging heavy in the air. I can't ignore it; I miss the life I left behind."

And yet, even as he spoke the words, he knew the path before him was fraught with uncertainty.

To leave becoming a priest would mean turning back on everything he had ever known, on the expectations of his family and the vows he silently had sworn before God. But to stay would mean a lifetime of longing, of wondering what could have been.

"Son, it's your decision, but why did you wait until we were prepared to go?"

"I am sorry, I just could not make a decision. I have torn both ways."

"Okay, but your mother will be upset."

"I will talk to her," Bob said.

Bob had an interview with the Archbishop before his departure. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and reached for the courage to speak to the Archbishop.

"Your Excellency, I've decided the priesthood. t was a difficult decision."

"Of course, Bob. Sit down, and let's talk freely."

"As far as I can remember, my family's tradition of a legacy of priesthood has been a weight upon my shoulders. But I discovered something about myself that contradicts my commitment to the priesthood."

"Go on, Bob."

"Your Excellency, I have to be h nest. I understand celibacy is a requirement for the priesthood is a requirement, but my attraction to women is stronger than I thought. That would be a constant struggle, overshadowing any joy or fulfillment from serving the Church.Therefore, I will not become a priest."

"Your concerns are understandable. I am glad you understand your limitation, but have you considered other ways to serve the Church outside the priesthood?"

"I am open to exploring all avenues of service."

"I will support you in whatever avenues you choose. I know your decision required a great deal of reflection and integrity. God Bless you in your future endeavors."

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"Thank Your Excellency."

He left with a heavy heart.

Bob called his Sister Ruth and told her about his decision.

"Sis, I have decided to leave the priesthood."

"I know we are trying to get refunds on our airline tickets and hotel rooms."

"If you guys lose money, I will make it up to you."

In a low voice, Ruth said," so what now?"

"I have to get a job."

"Okay, good luck then."

"Thanks."

Bob was surprised Ruth did not question his reasoning for quitting.

Packing was a challenge. Bob could not help but think that whatever the future held, the choice was his alone. He would leave the campus early the next day. Bob entered the Church before daylight for prayer. As the first light of dawn filtered through the stained glass windows, he whispered a silent prayer for strength.

On his journey home, Bob had doubts about the future. He had left messages for Jordan, but she had not responded or answered his phone calls. He was determined to determine her status, as he had not communicated with her in a long time.

Meanwhile, Ruth completed her stages of becoming a Nun through Aspirancy, working with a counselor. Postulancy: a deepening of understanding the spirit and nature of becoming a Nun while living in a house with other candidates for 18 months. Novitiate, a novice, confirms her choice and completes her profession of vows. She has now decided to work with people with low incomes on the streets of Mexico. Her first assignment was six months away.

Bob wanted to know what Jordan was doing, so he waited across the street in front of her house until she arrived, then knocked on her door.

"Hello, Jordan."

"Bob, what are you doing here?"

"I've been texting and calling you. I have left becoming a priest and am back in secular life."

"Why."

"Because I have feelings for you."

"Wait, you can't just come here and expect us to continue after all this time. You made your decision when you left me. I am seeing someone that I like. It would help if you moved on, also. "

"Wait, you need to hear me ou..."

Jordan interrupted, "you should leave."

Bob went home disappointed without incident.

The family was unhappy with Bob because of his abrupt exit from the priesthood. They eventually got their deposits back, and things calmed down.

The parental home of Bob and Ruth in the foothills of Texas paints a vivid picture of rustic charms and natural beauty. As you approach the area, the landscape gradually transforms from flat plains to gently rolling hills, covered in lush greenery and scattered with wildflowers, particularly in the springtime when the Texas bluebonnets bloom.

The fields fill the air with the aromas of wildflowers and freshly mowed hay. Tall oak and pecan trees dot the landscape, providing shade from the Texas sun and adding to the picturesque scenery.

The homestead itself is a quaint farmhouse nestled among the hills. It has a wrap-around porch with rocking chairs, where Bob and Ruth's parents likely spend their watching the evening sun paint hues of orange and pink.

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Wildlife and birds voice their presence in the atmosphere. At the same time, the distant lowing of cattle serves as a reminder of the area's agricultural heritage. In the distance, you can see the outlines of small towns and villages, their church spires reaching towards the sky, a testament to the strong religious presence in the area. The local Church, St. Michaels, set opposite the courthouse in the town square, has been the sanctuary for the Reynolds family for generations, and the community views it as a beacon of faith.

As Ruth prepares to embark on her journey to become a Nun and pursue missionary work across the border, Bob scowls at the events that interfered with his love life.

Ruth is comforted by the home's surrounding landscape, its beauty and tranquility, and the vastness of the world beyond.

It may seem ironic that Bob's relationship with God becomes closer since his departure from the seminary and potential priesthood.

He consulted with his local priest and volunteered his services to the local Church. Bob's redemption beyond the cloth started with expressing his feelings to Father John.

"I felt so much more deeply my heart belonged with a family," Bob explained. "There's no way to articulate it except I felt more present and human there. Even just painting the picture in my mind almost brought me to tears."

Bob's service to the Church beyond the cloth centered at St. Michael's Church in the quiet Texas town of San Augustus, Texas, near the Texas border. Within the walls of St. Michael's, Father John has been the guiding light, leading his congregation with wisdom and compassion and a significant influence in mentoring the younger generation of Reynold's, including Ruth and Bob. Father John would be essential in Bob's future role in the Catholic Church outside the priesthood.

It took nine years for Ruth to become a Missionary Sister of Charity. She attended a "come-and-see" period to determine what she wanted to do and decided on missionary work in Mexico, which required her to be fluent in Spanish. Then Ruth completed Formation and Aspirancy and then Novitiate. While in the first year (canonical), she undertook more religious study and learned about life as a Missionary of Charity, the second year was more focused on practical training for mission life.

After two years, Ruth took temporary vows for one year, which are renewed annually, for five years. They also receive a metal crucifix and a sari whose three blue stripes stand for their vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience. In the sixth year, she traveled abroad for "Tertianship" and further religious study, at the end of which Ruth made her final profession.

For anyone in a religious order, ministering to prostitutes is easily the most challenging ministry and outside most comfort zones. Dealing with rejection is a learned experience. It means working with strength and fortitude in darkness and despair.

Some will ultimately acquire a pimp which makes it impossible to quit and remain for ten years or more for fear they will come to harm from the pimp. Most will back off and retreat to their previous lifestyle in the early stages with guidance, or they will be committed to a vile and degrading lifestyle fueled by their dependence on drugs supplied by their pimps who know they cannot get better money to support their addiction. So the pimps get them hooked on drugs as quickly as possible and then trap them into this life of prostitution. Ministering to "street-level" prostitutes who are homeless and need quick cash are the first-level targets of evangelists before the pimps get them.

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