Still Life by Edward Drobinski - HTML preview
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Still Life
Page 79
plebian contractors who receive verbal instructions only and reply in the same fashion, paid for by a 10% cut. Email is considered vulgar. Texting is treason.
The Crime Solving Enterprise
The old Aristocrats possess an uncanny ability to intuitively solve crimes. Their methods are unclear. Some say it's deduction, others say it's divine boredom. They solve cases quickly but delay their reports, fearing that efficiency might lead to a demand for discounted rates. Their motto: "Justice, eventually."
William I said: “I wonder if they’d try to pay less if they knew how easy this is.”
Queen Maxima Furrbaby answered; “If they have any sense, they’ll just look at the results. If they’re retards, they’ll ignore that to nickel and dime.”
Local law enforcement tolerates this arrangement, partly because the Aristocrats are never wrong, and partly because no one wants to explain the castle's plumbing system to a judge.
The Castle Itinerary Revisited