21 levels of Self-Deception: THIRD EDITION by Tom Wallace - HTML preview

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based on this initial response. Standing back, counting to ten and taking a deep breath are all methods of making us think twice about this initial response and behave with a bit more care and compassion. It might seem like a trivial example and something of a clichéd response. But I’d venture that taking a bit of time to think why we react negatively to some people and some situations can be very helpful in understanding who we are. The pause and the more careful response is where the creativity takes place. And our more measured response is often to seek some kind of commonality between the other person and ourselves. ‘Here is a person who seems different’, we might say to ourselves, ’but they have to eat and sleep like me, make a living, find a house, find a partner and raise a family’. The creative conversation is about getting someone to reveal their story. Even friendly banter and teasing can be about getting others to reveal their character. So the value that is paramount in this response is equality. We might well feel that our first and immediate response, human nature being what it is, will be the one that will happen most frequently — we will either love or hate someone without much consideration of the matter. Here I want to suggest that there is some external leaning towards grace that prompts us to the alternative response — at least some of the time. So it is grace that pushes us to see the beauty in the world, and to respond in a creative way, with care and compassion and with an eye to equality.

Could we achieve this? Well, that’s where a kind of purpose comes into play. And that takes a lifetime of practice, careful stepping back and

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