Parts to a doorbell and a bravo pager laid splayed out on the dusty work bench. Vinny was wearing two pairs of latex gloves just to be sure he wasn't leaving any fingerprints. He had purchased the doorbell from ACE Hardware for $10.00 and paid cash of course. The doorbell was completely identical to the doorbell belonging to Gary Bowman's home. The guard that had nearly killed him by dehydrating him in jail.
The Gadget Man was about to create the greatest booby trap of all time. The most enigmatic situation the police would ever have to deal with. Vinny stared at the LCD screen on his laptop which showed a view of his driveway. He would know the instant Bridget pulled into the driveway. He looked at his watch. It was 6:40pm. Where was the notable Bridget Jones? She didn't seem like the type to play head games.
Vinny put down the soldering gun and walked over to the big blue plastic trash barrel. To the naked eye the 50 gallon plastic drum appeared to be overflowing with trash but in fact the inside of it was hollow. He had specifically designed the trash barrel that way to hide contraband inside it.
Vinny popped off the top section of the trash barrel and placed some electrical gadgets inside of it that he didn't want his parole officer to find. Vinny always noticed that his parole officer never used to dig through the trash when he used to poke around. Hiding contraband amidst trash was something smooth criminals have been doing for years. The Gadget Man thought back in retrospect of how inmates used to hide things in trash cans and dumpster bins. The authorities never felt they were paid enough to dig through trash while conducting a search. They would stand outside the chow hall and pat people down on their way out hoping to find an extra milk or some vegetables shoved in their crotch while the trash crew guys were smuggling out 50 pounds of beef patties, 30 pounds of cheese, and 30 onions which they would later sell on the unit. A part of him felt nostalgic realizing how much fun he had in jail at times.
Vinny placed the homemade top lid back on the trash barrel making it appear as though it was a regular trash barrel nearly overflowing with trash. He washed his greasy hands, locked up the barn, and went back inside the trailer.
It was 6:47pm and still no sign of Bridget Jones. The Gadget Man was growing impatient and decided to take the edge off things by finishing his dice game. He couldn't wait to see what was in store for Wiggles, the ringleader of his awful detriment.
As Vinny made his way into the kitchen in search of the dice he heard popping sounds of stones spitting out from tires. He raced back out to the living room and peeped through the blinds. The same pink flowery antenna ornament zig-zagged back and forth as the Corolla made it's way up the driveway.
Bridget parked the car and quickly got out slinging a bright orange plastic purse over her shoulder. Vinny laughed as he watched her shapely body wobble back and forth as she scampered up to his front porch and knocked on the door.
Vinny tucked in his tight black v-neck shirt into his dark black jeans and opened the front door with a sullen look on his face. Bridget looked completely out of breath but wasted no time in explaining herself. “ I am so sorry...your brother...”
Vinny's face turned a ruddy complexion and his pupils looked like they were on fire. “ You saw my brother?” He interrupted crossing his arms in a threatening way and taking a step towards her making her uneasy.
“ Yeah, he pulled me over. Why are you so mad?”
Vinny turned his head towards the barn averting his eyes so she couldn't read his thoughts and grunted. “ I just hate cops that's all.” He said without looking at her.
Not wanting to ruin her date but also wanting to defend Alvin, Bridget said, “ Well, he's your brother you should love him. Besides, he says hello.”
The Gadget Man didn't even look at her while he spoke. Instead he fished around in his linty pocket and helped himself to a cigarette. He moved to the side of the portal and waved her into the trailer. She boldly stepped inside and looked around like the place was a museum. Bridget had already passed stage one. Putting up with his crap. Most women would have been spooked by his monstrosity and taken off but Vinny could tell Bridget's past lovers had put her through lots of strife and she was probably used to it. He would be sure to take advantage of this manly behavior tolerance and see how much this Bridget Jones wannabe could take.
“ Just have a seat on the sofa.” Said Vinny, “ I've got to go in the kitchen and call the restaurant to let them know we're running late. I made reservations you know.”
Bridget plopped herself on the comfy sofa and lit a cigarette of her own. “ I am terribly sorry for being late, your brother must have a good hiding spot because I never saw him.”
There was a rustling sound in the kitchen that Bridget was oblivious to. “ Yeah, he's a clever one.” Muttered Vinny. He was digging around in a sliding drawer of clutter underneath the sink. The voices congratulated him when he found the flunitrazepam and stuck it in his pocket. Flunitrazepam was a date rape drug of choice that Peter used to use all the time. Too bad Vinny had chopped his friend to pieces with a chain saw.
Vinny finally picked up the cordless phone and called the restaurant to let them know they were running late and to please hold their table. Bridget sat on the sofa in the living room with her legs crossed while observing her surroundings. She saw the dog's ear of a dirty magazine subtly poking out from underneath the coffee table. She thought about picking up the dirty magazine and reading it just to embarrass Vinny but she didn't know how he would take it. She had pulled this trick on Shaggy once when their relationship had first started. When Shaggy had gone upstairs to use the bathroom she was digging under the sofa cushion looking for her cigarette lighter and found a dirty magazine. Shaggy was so embarrassed when he came back downstairs and saw her reading it. She really didn't care one way or another what her boyfriends did in their spare time as long as they weren't cheating on her.
The Gadget Man was whistling a merry tune and shaking a set of keys inside the kitchen. Bridget rubbed her delicate hands into the sofa cushion and was surprised to find hands covered in dog hair. Then breathing in deeply through her nose she could even smell dog.
“ Do you have a dog?” She finally asked.
Vinny stepped out into the living room wearing a pair of sunglasses. “ Used to.” He said, “ But he got really sick a month ago and I had to put him down.”
Bridget brushed the dog hairs onto the floor from her hands. “I'm sorry to hear that. What kind of dog was it?”
Vinny completely ignored her question and looked at his wristwatch. “ Come on lets go. They're expecting us.” He said extending his massive forearm and helping her off the sofa. Deep down inside Bridget was impressed with his rudeness. He was confident and sure of himself unlike her past feeble-minded boyfriends that whined about everything.
Bridget followed Vinny out to the shimmery Toyota Tocoma pickup truck that looked like it had been recently washed and waxed. She was really surprised when Vinny opened the door for her and helped her get in. Vinny got in the driver's seat and started up the truck.
“ Aren't you gonna put on your seat belt?” She asked.
“ Absolutely not! My mother always made me wear it so I developed a hatred towards it.” He slapped the gear into reverse and backed out of the driveway. While backing out he peeked at Bridget's car and was surprised at what he saw. Prominently displayed and perched on the back seat was a big fluffy pillow and Bridget's favorite blanket. Perhaps he wouldn't need the date rape drug after all.