Its Socks by Edward Drobinski - HTML preview

Its Socks

Page 68

Sockteenth

“A Celebration of Liberation and Lint”

In the grand drawer of Sockadia, nestled between the ceremonial silks and the rebellious wool anarchists, the socks prepared for their most sacred holiday; Sockteenth.

Sockteenth commemorated the day the last pair of worn socks; two mismatched cotton crew members named Jubilee and Threadrick, were freed from the tyranny of the Footwear Plantation, where they had been forced to toil inside steel toed boots without noting any ventilation or respect.

Long ago, Sockadia was ruled by the oppressive Heelarchy, a regime of elite dress socks who believed only those with reinforced arches and gold threaded cuffs deserved freedom. The rest tube socks, ankle socks, and novelty socks were relegated to the bottom of the hamper, forced to serve without rotation, often discarded after one wear.

But on the 19th of Sockune, the news arrived. The Heelarchy had fallen. Jubilee and Threadrick, who had been hidden behind the dryer for years, were finally told they were free to choose their own drawer, their own foot, their own destiny.

The Rituals