Its Socks by Edward Drobinski - HTML preview

Its Socks

Page 2

“To find the sock, one must first lose the foot.”

Greg nodded solemnly, then asked if he could go home.

Denied.

He trudged through Sock Jungles, dodged Sock Krakens, and accidentally started a war between the Argyle Tribes and the Toe Ring Nomads by suggesting that ankle socks were “kind of pointless.” His only ally was a rebellious dryer named Steve, who had defected from the Laundry Wars and now wore a beret.

Eventually, Greg discovered the truth: the Sock Census was a scam. A cosmic prank played by bored beings from the Bureau of Arbitrary Assignments. The real chosen one had overslept, and Greg was just the guy who happened to be brushing his teeth near a dimensional rift.

So he did what any hero would do; he forged a peace treaty using dryer lint, declared socks a metaphor, and escaped through a wormhole disguised as a laundry chute.

Back on earth, Greg now runs a podcast called “Sock It to Me,” where he interviews household appliances and occasionally screams into the void.