1 THE BEGININGS
Let me take you back briefly to when I was just thirteen years old. Yes back then it was Kan-gos,zipper jackets(Michael Jackson) and yes Jerry curls and I was in the midst of it all rapping,singing and also of course break dancing and I loved them all but my heart was really into singing it was all I ever wanted to do I had a posse and yes we sort of had a group whenever we got together that was about it. I think we all were just exploring our options,that is until we got to high school and we all lost touch of each other,it was my junior year before consolidation(which was just so wonderful) but anyway like most of everyone my junior year was terrible from fights and every other minor squabbles...skipping onto my senior year I decided to enter a talent show that the school gave that's when I ran into one of my classroom friends and it turned out he was entering the talent show as I was so we had an idea to enter it together he also had the idea of having a couple of friends of ours into as well because we had a good chemistry singing wise and we both thought it would increase our chances of winning I think it was a song from this group called decide which were large back then and still is to me anyway the song was come and talk to me we all started out kind of nervous but in the end the nerves just worked it's way out of all of us and we were like r&b stars heads just swelling up just like that cartoon you see on TV about to pop anyway the people that weren't our friends then were our friends now at least that's what we thought and our popularity was at an all time tea-sing,pretty soon afterward we kinda had a good feeling about where we were going so we did other talent shows came in at second place for a while then finally won first place but it was with a scam producer not long after that run in we've performed at games,other people family reunions almost every place that can have talent like ours we were there then it got to our graduation after that we lost touch of each other the chemistry there didn't last long everybody wanted to go there own ways so we did me kind of getting out of singing for a while kinda recharged me so not to long fate came in and I ran into another person that I knew from the school days and we decided to give it a try believe me I was skeptical because it would involve me going to California but I had confidence in us and I knew we would have good chemistry I took the chance he had told me that he had a couple of guys already up there waiting for us so I said why not needless to say I smoked like a lot of weed in my younger days so you can best believe it was on like donkey in some thongs we didn't have the money to fly so we took the greyhound which our future manager paid for the tickets let me tell you that was the longest bus ride I ever had and don't want again we were high all the way to taxes and that's when we had to change buses and in the process we meet an interesting person as we were getting back on the bus he sort of like glanced our way to check us out I guess to see if we were on the up and up he stood there looking for about five seconds then looked off then he looked at us again and me being high already I started to get paranoid and was telling my friend hey who the hell is he looking at my friend said exactly so as I was about to ask him he quickly said hey what';s up homey and sort of hip but redneck way you guys looking to get high well needless to say we had to quickly scope this man out you know just to see if he wasn't 5o meaning police of course turned out he wasn't you can sort of tell that as you were talking to him but anyway he took out the most fattest joint that I ever seen in my life the thing was the size of two number two pencils and about as long and hey not seeing anything like that like ever before we had to take a closer look you know and in saying that you can easily get conned into buying something like that and it winds up being laced with something so he let us take a closer look and we found nothing so anyway being the weed heads we once were it was in good timing that we had an extra fifteen minutes of waiting we hop off and walked around doing our thing didn't feel anything till we got back on the bus that is I mean it was look that three stooges thing happening on that bus whoa I know I felt like I missile went off in my head then landed on my head I couldn't move for like five hours I looked over at my buddy he was like sleep...that quick as soon as we got on the bus and sat down gone,I felt like I was high for two days I couldn't believe how powerful that it was we stopped in Abilene,taxes and as we got back on the road I noticed what I thought was a sphere just floating up near the bus station it may have been the weed but then again who knows I felt good !I forgot to mention that it took us two days and three nights to get to L.A. If I didn't feel like I did I wouldn't have made it all that way. We finally stopped at the bus station in L.A. And with us being country boys we were like a deer caught in headlights everywhere I went I seen different nationalities a group of people from India with those dots on there forehead and also a group of Africans with their dashikis on with their whole traditional wear I mean every single nationality was there I was in total awe I think we both were but the next thing we had to do was look for our manager and in doing that was literally trying to find a needle in a haystack. Luckily we ran into his son who knew my friend right off we introduced ourselves to his father our manager at the time and then we drove off to his home in which he stayed in Pasadena ca. We palled up and got out into the house and dude it was like day and night, nice suburban neighborhood of course and then as we got inside it was like boys from the hood dudes over in one area playing dominoes and people in another area called the weed lounge a name I made up and in another room a couple of people doing music but let's go back to when we came in as soon as we came in this cool albino gang member just dropped an ounce on the table and said y’all wanna smoke this bra with me and my friend first off wanting to fit in and second smoked weed at the time we took a hit and like a rat that loves cheese traps we took to the bait like a head on collision. And we passed out I think it was like 7:00 when we got there and we were out by 7:15...gone bye-bye till the next morning. After waking up with enough crusts around our eyes to bake a pecan pie I ran into a crowd in the kitchen area you guess it playing dominoes I played a little when I was at home but not like they play it's like the second past time next to getting high that's when we were introduced to our managers other son meat head this dude was so cool anyway moving on a Mr pop's who was our manager didn't waste any time he had a string of events for us which is one of the reasons I loved this dude also a very articulate person by the way, he spared no expense when it came to what we needed but first off the bat we had an important meeting at a nightclub to see If we could perform and show off our talents in front of a very famous celebrities uncle because he was in charge of finding talent for that celebrity so you know we had to make a good impression on him we started off a little slow but we picked the pace up the harmony was flawless and we wooed everyone afterward he told us he loved the show and at the end of the day we all came out feeling pretty good about ourselves but non the less being in the music buzz you have to move on to the next opportunity so we made a friend through our manager who was working for mac records and at that time he told us that we needed to make a video for the people around the music industry to let them know that we were going to be the next big thing around this city having another notch on that belt we accomplished that. Well a couple of days after pops had a made us an appointment to talk to the producers and manger of a very famous gospel group that I’m sure everybody knows but I'm not saying at this time. The way we wanted to do this was basically to either get in touch with one of his producers by giving him our tape or sing gospel in order to get in the door.. I know what you’re thinking why choose this path and not be true to your craft but you see we had that much confidence in ourselves that we can just about do anything so like I said before pops gave us many options and this was just one of them so we performed a couple of songs and gave him a couple of songs on our tape for him to let other people that would help if he couldn't as it became late in the day we decided to leave and go home to just take a break from things and while we were driving in pops introduced us to a neighbor across the street an Australian person named Mr mate don't ask me why they called him that...well I know why but I didn't understand it but the dude was so cool and also it just so happens that he sold weed yeah I know it seems like we were just weed magnets he had some of the best around and whew!! did he ever one swig of this and you were counting stars and thinking about blue stars purple clovers and orange mountains yeah that good and he also liked our music I have to say I never met a more interesting person wasn't flashy or anything and as a matter of fact far from it had plenty of women knocking on his door a different women every time I was over there the only thing though he was Keokuk for cocoa puffs if you get the meaning I but I mean he was so level headed and very bright but still unstable I guess it was from smoking so much or somebody spiked his happy grass. He dove a late eighties Mercedes and always had some ragtag clothes on thrift store style scruffy hair and had a Cali swagger about him one more thing he always kept fireworks on him and yes I mean fourth of July type fireworks though I never seen him use it. Yeah life just can't get better than this...right moving on after being cupped up in the house for so long I decided to get out and just walk around to see the sights so luckily around that time they had some kind of festival down town and it was packed wall to wall with all kind of people from all walks of life and it didn't hurt that the women well the ones I seen were beautiful like a country boys dream and they didn't mind talking to you I think I met this one girl her name was Alex and while we talking some Hispanic guy came to her and said are you ready I’m like OK what's going on here she said nothing pap just give me five minutes I said OK babe not too long afterward I noticed how everyone started to slowly depart from the streets and about the time I blinked it was like the fast and furious it totally blew my mind from her being in the middle to her dropping her hands when they drove past with their tires smoking, after the sow was over she came back up to me and from then on I thought I was in love I gotta tell you that was like someone ignited a fire that was deep inside me in a cocoon we had a wonderful time together even though it was just a couple of hours if you now what I mean...don't think too hard by the time I left it was about to get dark so I headed to the local college around from where I live to play a little basketball before I could even get my game going I was approached by this lady that asked me did I go there I said no she said why not we have this that and the third etc...etc...etc and I’m looking at her like hey you trying to recruit me to go here or are you asking me to call you she said well...both needless to say it was an awesome day and as the night falls I decided to head back and call it a night but soon as I could get some kind of rest my managers son meat head told me to come over here a minute now this was like twelve o-clock and well past my sleep time so I’m not a happy camper before I knew it about seven or eight people in the kitchen playing dominoes smoking on a blunt telling me to sing something from a song mi like dude are ya serious they started laughing for a minute and said... yeah drunk and high not a good combination sometimes what could say no why yes yes I did and went to bed. The next morning I woke up pops our manager had set us up an appointment to go to the studio to lay a couple of tracks down so we can perform at one of the nightclubs downtown I don't think we ever got to make it till later on theist night I think we visited every relative our manager had and friends and also ate at every one. The food was like a organism board of a variety of all..Asian,African,Polynesian and Indian and we enjoyed them all when we finally got there I think we were all too stuffed to move it was like trying to remove a twinkle out of a fat guys mouth it wasn't gonna happen we actually had to wait an hour before we even got started, but we knew we had to suck it up and muster enough to live our dreams so we got it done . The next pops bought us outfits and we practiced till later that evening when it was time for us to get ready to go downtown to the nightclub and as we got to the rooms we were assigned to of course the jitters set in but were gone thirty seconds after we got on stage and had one of the best performances that we had ever done in awhile overcome with emotions of having known that we did our best put us in a state of peace knowing we put our best foot forward applause and claps were loud and as we felt the energy of the crowd loving the sound and stage presence that we had I knew that good things were just around the corner for us and later on we celebrated by rounds at the bar and sessions at home later on with clouds so thick that you could literally slice through it with a knife. We felt like this was just the beginning but didn't know the half of it, you know in this life of fame and fortune in the music buzz there are always pitfalls that test you and oh boy it really tested us. Through the weeks we kind of had a period of no calls and did no studio sessions so let just say everyone was at odds and attitudes were abundant I mean sure we would sing anytime we had something in our head or something in our system to encourage it, not realizing how long this take we started flipping out on each other almost getting into fights and finally coming to a point that we couldn't stand looking at each other we decided to take a break for a minute to clear our heads so I decided that I wanted to see my aunt and uncle in Sacramento so I took the greyhound out there you know at first I was kind of afraid to take this journey but as the hours passed I couldn't wait to see them I think it was around the fourth of July when it came and since my uncle and aunt knew I was coming they cooked up a grand feast southern style that included fried chicken with mustard and collard greens with pecan pies and cornbread and also cakes galore, that was the best fourth of July I ever had I went over my cousins house and her husband who was also into music. I never knew my other family outside of living where I was in Tennessee and I really appreciated the time I spent out thee meeting my other family which I love so much my cousin geese and I had a ball and yes she smoked too and no I don’t remember half of what we did when we kicked it out there because I was so wasted I had another cousin out thee but at the time he was locked up and I didn't have the chance to met him. But let me tell you this I didn't think not once of music and what I was doing in Pasadena I wanted to leave that behind me and focus on a peaceful retreat in Sacramento I didn't want to leave but I knew I had to sooner or later I stayed as long as I could but it was time so I got myself mentally and physically ready for the trip out and I guess I was about ready. I think it was about 5:00 that evening when I got back and when I arrived I had so much good energy and good thoughts on how to get things going that I was ready for anything. When my manager picked me up at the bus station he seen that I was different person he asked me you know son you have a glow about yourself and also noticed how my attitude was also unfamiliar to him and told me have I smoked anything when I was down there and that he wanted whatever I already had I asked him what was going on around the way he told me everybody was waiting on me and that they were eager to get started as soon as we pulled up I seen the guys outside and in that zone if you know what I mean pops had booked us a show to do at the local nightclub so we all got ready and believe it or not we had a great show all of the producers I mean big time people were there and we all knew that if any time this one going to be it no doubt about it but we all forgot that in the music industry there is a very important rule and that is to have patience without that you are going to go insane I had to find an outlet and quick I didn't think I could make it one of my group members girlfriend was going back to her house when they invited me to just get away for a spell and just lounge and that we did where she stayed the scene was like an art masterpiece the view of the mountains were jaw dropping and it had a serene feels when you sat outside and just embraced it all especially when your with Mary by your side if you know what I mean dude California is a beautiful place I mean I see why people come and don't want to leave it's that beautiful. My buddy girlfriend invited one of her friends over because I guess I looked so lonely and pathetic to her she felt bad or whatever anyway I real appreciated it non the less it turned out to be a fun day we played a little spades and dominoes of course she beat me good the ten to twenty times we played hey I didn't care I was so glad she came this chick was gorgeous and cool it's hard to get a female like that because they're so stuck on themselves but up here the air is all good and everybody's so cool and laid back here I mean don't get me wrong you have nutcases anywhere you go but for the most part they are as the night falls I started to get a little homesick I guess missing that southern fried chicken and pumpkin pie and also eating that fatback out of those wonderful tasting turnip greens and ooh! Yes the smell of cabbage as well especially the way my mother cooks it it really started to get to me there is great food up here but down there is my home and there is no place like it. This is a big place and compared to where I stay we're like a small pond next to an ocean literally. Forrest humps mother was telling the truth life is like a box of chocolates you just don't know which one you pick will be the one you want or something to that effect anyway they tried to hook me up with this lady but it was something in me that was not just wanting to go there it was like I was putting up a wall in front of her and it was made of lead nothing was getting through that after a certain period of time I think I just got so wasted all I wanted to do was stay to myself for a while and they knew I was getting a little distant from them I started to feel like I was becoming the threes a crowd person. While I was having a good time I was thinking back to much of my old times coming back to me and clouding my mind,my body and my soul as much weed that I smoked even that couldn't take away what I was feeling. I decided to just cap off the night by taking a nap so I could not be a distraction to everyone else. By the next morning my buddy took me to the side or rather outside and we had a nice chat and I felt bad about last night so I apologized to him I felt like I needed to and of course he wasn't worried about that being a good friend to me he was more concerned about me and how I was. I don't know if I was just lonely or homesick or just being a total goofball I just knew that I didn't know how long I could take being here anymore something had to give and I wish it was our music but no we still had no calls a total drought of epic proportion. We went back home and decided to fine tune our skills our other group members were waiting on us eager themselves and I’m sorry if I didn't mention about them so I will Steve the laid back smooth and don't let anything get to him person he was cool as hell,loved his music he reminded of one of the five heartbeats because of the pretty boy hair and talent and Terrell the stocky silly but very talented cat was cool as well an yes he was very dedicated to the art as well I think me and Terrell were the only ones that didn't have girlfriends up there but we really weren't looking I think Mary Jane was the only ones that we truly loved anyway, we also enjoyed the company of that Aussie dude across the street he kept us rolling. My manager son meat head asked me and my buddy mike my back in the days group members name if we wanted to go over one of his friends house and since it was nothing else to do we took off he stayed in an apartment complex around the way I think his name was mike also homeboy was a very interesting fellow I think he was a person that dealt in the fine arts if you know what I mean well we got there and the dude didn't waste anytime by firing one up I thought he might have been the quiet type but boy was I mistaken after he had gotten a little alcohol in his system you couldn't shut him up I liked the brother because he was a straight up pulled no punches type of dude and he was funny as hell. Thinking that this was going to be a boring time proved out to be not true by a mile this dude had all types of women he didn't discriminate and me and my mike were at aw at the whole thing it's not like he was a pretty boy I think it was more like he had clout and his mannerism attracted them I enjoyed myself the whole time and with meat head I found doubt there is never a boring moment he keep us on our toes at all times I use to say he was all races in one because when you look at him he looks Indian,Asian,Chinese and Korean a melting pot of races in one person. But as I was saying earlier we had gotten so wasted I actually didn't remember anything that we've done that night I think the last thing that I do remember is drinking and after that that's it mind went blank after being there for what seemed like forever we managed to somehow leave and get back home safely and I went straight to bed you know back in my younger days I thought I could hang with the best of them but watching how they did it I was nothing and it showed I woke up the next morning ripe and ready to go but as soon as I checked on most of my friends my buddy that went with me last night wasn't feeling good I think he might have stayed up and continued to drink and had a hangover my other two members were gone somewhere and we didn't see them for hours plus my manager was out of pocket and so getting everyone to come together and do anything was going to be impossible that day I came into my managers son boneheads room to just hang out with him because he liked to mix and scratch and had some awesome mixes that I loved to sing on or rap whichever it may have been if I didn't mention about bonehead the dude was pretty cool laid back as well and very to the point like his brother but he rubbed off on me as well I swear by the time I stayed there a couple months I was talking just like them I guess what they say is true you go to a place and stay for a minute you tend to take on their ways Wow I can't believe how true that is but that's another story I will tell later on in this book, anyway the morning after we finally managed to get everyone together my mike was feeling better the other two were back and up and attempt the new mission if we choose to take it was to continue practicing to polish our skills. Our manager pops finally got us a show it was at a local game around there and it was the national anthem and it was off the chain we had the crowd screaming and roaring and standing up. The life of an entertainer is awesome and I was living it up to the utmost in Cali, their has been positive influences their to help and mold us to becoming the best and we were truly becoming that with pops wisdom and inspiration that goal was becoming to get more clearer to accomplish, not fearing a soul when we were on the stage embracing what we had to offer to the world the hunger become even more stronger and we were certain an opportunity was coming our way so when things got slow sometime for us and they did we managed to entertain ourselves until we got to do a show or go to the studio it was like a gravitational pull to just go across the street every time we have nothing to do and that's to go to the Aussie’s house our friend he never kept us without anything to do I believe he had a couple of his female friends at the house and boy did they entertain let's just say we put a few bucks in the deposit box so we all had a nice show he had the scented candles a burning so it could permeate the air and we filled the air with the nice aroma of that sweet scent of Mary it could have really been sparks in there without the fireworks I never had a nice time like this back in my home state well....not this nice of a time anyway the lesson learned here is never come to a nice persons house like rm Aussie empty handed you will not get anywhere and I mean anywhere realizing the situation of money getting low Mr Aussie gave us no need of anymore money to spend because he had our backs I guess after hearing how famous we were going to be and we displaying our talent he told us we didn't have to spend a dime and I wish I could have known that sooner before I wasted my ten bucks that's all I had shrugging it off though I continued to be intrigued by beautiful women and chronic in the air like a dona room filled with hot steam we had a wonderful night I think we spent countless days there it beginning to be like our second home meanwhile my friend whom I went up here with was seeing a women here and I think that he was falling in love with her I kinda noticed we weren't seeing that much of him lately which was cool it's not like we were doing anything and I was happy for him that he found somebody up here even though I’ve been searching to find nothing but heartache and loneliness the sad sad life of a broken down entertainer here folks but counting on my charm and my wits I kept on. Mean when I got here I was expecting the big life you know like money,cars and movie stars and oh did I forget to mention money I didn't know how hard you'd have to work to get it participating in any kind of music event would be a welcoming thing but it was so dry for us not even Sahara would offer a challenge even though I really didn't want to I started to go out to try to find a job anywhere I could but somehow and in some way I never seemed to get around to doing it thinking first off that it wasn't going to be a need you know I started to think about before I got in to do this I was in my earlier group with another friend of mine and they had things moving I mean we had put out a tape yes back in the tape days I know I know I’m old but back then we didn't have a manager and we kept things rolling by always making sure we had shows lined up and going to the studio constantly putting out tapes after tapes after tapes I remember we did a show with a group called triple six mafia in the line up and even back then they were on the rise we felt like accomplished entertainers then but it all fell apart soon afterward but even then we still did a whole lot it wasn't like this compared to this that was big time for me because we made money and steadily had gigs lined up I’m not knocking pops because he fought hard to accomplish things for us it just wasn't anything popping off for us as quick as we all wanted it what we needed was that other avenue to go so we decided to go and see our friend from mac records and when we did we had to go over his house and try to discuss some plans let me tell this mans house was like none I have ever seen it was like something you see in a magazine high ceilings,crystal chandeliers and beautiful artwork I had to get over the fact that this dudes house was freaking fabulous and I can't forget the cars in his driveway a q45 infinite when they were a big thing back then a BMW and a Ferrari but trying to focus on the subject of us getting back so we can get to moving with our music look we were just tired of missing out on opportunities and wasn't going to let anything pass us by so we got started on a major movie deal to do a few songs on the soundtrack our manager pops hooked up through one of his contacts it was a major movie and we wanted in so badly we probably would have sold our souls that day so that's what we did I don’t know but I’m guessing it had to be a lot of money they paid for that studio time and we had to make every bit of it count no time to play games if we ever wanted anything we had to take this chance of a lifetime now there will be no turning back we were all out of options and our back was really against the wall everyone was on pins and needles as far as pressure we had to at least try to do several songs and decide on which one of the three to go with pops I know had to have at least smoked two packs a night in the studio only I know I smoked well we all smoked about ten stack to the head and when we got through we came out with what we thought was some really good songs the next day pops gave our songs that we choose to the big wigs that headed that department they told us that they really like two of the songs that we had and would get in touch withes as far as putting it on the movie soundtrack we didn't know how long we would wait for that call and well with nothing to do you know what the next place was yeah that's right it's time to see rm Aussie again now that day we smoked so much that I later on realized it was time for me to stop or at least take a long break waiting for a call to let us know what was going on with the tracks we made was a long process but after a few weeks that call finally came around and what they said nearly blew us out of the chairs we were sitting in I guess the bigger wigs thought that it wasn't a good fit so they had no choice but to scrap it and that my friends was the straw that broke the camels back I think that's how it goes and soon afterward we slowly went as well to pieces that is we didn't know which way was up and no one had an explanation every time we have something good something else takes us back down I’m starting to remember the time me and my friend came up on the bus and we met this girl named redyes and she said that she use to dance for MC hammer she actually did a few things on the bus because we didn't believe her and I tell you what she had some moves that made me a believer I told her what are you doing now and she said nothing at all and that she was going home to see her relatives and try to start a new somewhere else she also said before she was a dancer for MC hammer she was struggling everywhere she went as far as dancing goes not catching a break from no one and she was at the point of giving up but it wasn't until she met some man that asked her that if she still was looking to dance he knew someone that was looking for some dancers and he was a new an upcoming act that was about to blow she was desperate and said why not and before she could blink she tried out and made it and it turned out to be MC hammer and the point is she never gave up and keep on going and it paid off big time and I’m thinking now that's what we did but every time we did something I just felt like it wasn't going anywhere because that devil brought us right back down and we stayed down that was enough for us and it showed .
Well my friend that I made at the college came over for a visit and let's just say I was surprised I didn't see that coming a mile away I let her listen to our music and she loved it and no I didn't try to do anything I was just glad she came we ended up talking the night away when it got too late I walked her back to the college she was attending thinking I made a love connection I felt real good after all she came back to see me at my house and well soon after that I never seen her again mi like was it my breath I always try to keep a fresh breath and brush my teeth daily I might have ate some onions that day then I started to think I was little musty from the pits but I always make sure I put on deodorant so it wasn't that but that was my l