Narragansett Pier After Midnight by Edward Drobinski - HTML preview

The Boys Get Back

Back at their own pier, the two teenage brothers, Karl and Ernst Whitel, have gotten back home, but their hearts were still racing. They huddled together on the moonlit sofa. Their encounter with the vampire had been surreal; a mix of terror and fascination. The creature’s crimson eyes had pierced through the darkness, and its wings had fluttered like a macabre ballet. The vampire’s eyes weren’t really crimson, but imagining that is conducive to the claimed surreality of the situation.

As they sat catching their breath, Karl whispered; “Did you see its teeth? Like needles, man!”

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Ernst nodded, still trembling. “Yeah, and the way it moved, like a shadow. I thought vampires were supposed to be elegant or something, but that thing was straight out of a nightmare. .....

Cool hat though.”

They both glanced at the ceiling, half expecting the vampire to swoop down again. But all they saw were highly placed cobwebs.

“Remember when we used to think bats were creepy?” Karl mused.

“Now they seem downright friendly compared to that bloodsucker.”

Ernst chuckled nervously. “Yeah, I’d take a bat over a vampire any day. At least bats don’t drain your life force.”

As they had made their way back home, they vowed never to venture into the Fuhray house after dark again. But deep down, they knew this encounter would be their secret; a story not to tell around campfires, a bond forged in fear and wonder.

And perhaps, just perhaps, they’d remember the vampire’s eyes and the bats’ fluttering wings as more than mere fright. Maybe, in the quiet moments of their lives, they’d wonder if those creatures had their own friendships, their own secrets hidden in the night.

“The lights are still on over there.”

“The creep must be expecting company.”

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“Other vampires?”

“Vampires are social with other vampires?”

“Yes. ...... No. ... I don’t know. Let’s ask the AI. It knows everything.”

Karl: “Yeah right. So, do you believe vampires are social with other vampires?”

AI: “Well, as an AI language model, I don’t hold beliefs or opinions, but I can certainly discuss the topic. The existence of vampires has fascinated humanity for centuries. Legends and folklore from various cultures around the world have contributed to the enduring myth of these bloodsucking creatures. Let’s explore both sides of the argument.”

Karl: “That wasn’t exactly what I asked. Let’s try this.

Vampires are just fictional characters from books and movies, right?”

AI: “That’s a common perspective. Many people consider vampires purely fictional, originating from literature and popular culture. Bram Stoker’s novel ‘Dracula’ – 1897, played a significant role in shaping our modern image of vampires. Since then, countless vampire stories, movies, and TV shows have perpetuated the myth.”

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Karl: “Hmmmm. Again. But what about historical accounts? Aren’t there stories of real life vampires?”

AI: “Indeed, some historical accounts and cultural beliefs hint at vampire like creatures. Let’s delve into a few examples: The Chupacabra: In Latin American folklore, the Chupacabra is a creature that drains the blood of livestock. While skeptics attribute livestock deaths to other causes, some locals genuinely believe in its existence.

The Strigoi: In Romanian folklore, the Strigoi are undead beings that rise from the grave to harm the living. These legends have persisted for centuries.

Porphyria Theory: Some researchers suggest that the vampire myth may have originated from real medical conditions. For instance, porphyria, a rare genetic disorder, can cause sensitivity to sunlight, reddish urine, and other symptoms that might resemble vampirism.

Jew Theory – The actual jew physical resemblance to the fictionally depicted vampires as well as their metaphorical sucking of blood based on their disproportionately evil control over others prompts many constituents to defensively make up false excuses, like that Hitler alone convinced the entire world of something untrue, and the Holohoax.”

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Karl: “But scientifically speaking, vampires can’t exist, right?”

AI: “From a scientific standpoint, there’s no evidence supporting the existence of supernatural vampires. Here are some reasons why:

Lack of physical evidence: Despite centuries of vampire lore, no verifiable physical evidence; such as a preserved vampire corpse, has been found.

Biological impossibilities: Vampires are said to be immortal, drink blood, and transform into bats. These traits defy the laws of biology and physics.

Sunlight and garlic: Traditional vampire weaknesses, like sunlight and garlic, have no scientific basis.”

Karl: “But what about psychic vampires or energy vampires?”

AI: “Ah, interesting! Psychic vampires, also known as energy vampires, don’t physically drain blood but supposedly feed off emotional or psychic energy. Some people believe that certain individuals can sap others’ vitality through negative interactions or emotional manipulation. However, this concept remains controversial and lacks empirical evidence.”

Karl: “So, bottom line; vampires are just myths?”

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AI: “Most scientists and skeptics would say yes. The vampire myth persists because it taps into our primal fears and desires; the fear of death, the allure of immortality, and the mystery of the unknown. Whether you believe in vampires as supernatural beings or view them as symbolic metaphors, they continue to captivate our imaginations.”

Karl: “Assume that vampires do exist. In that case do they seek the company of other vampires?”

AI: “All of God’s creatures who are not mentally ill prefer their own, so it would seem quite consistently logical that vampires first and foremost enjoy the company of other vampires; just as it is natural for White people who are not retarded to prefer the company of other White people. I suppose that a certain degree of confusion is inflicted upon the lumpen proletariat when the media controlled by the powers that be arises in unison to claim supposedly abhorrent racism, while all ignore the natural fact that it is okay for coons to admit they prefer being around other coons, that wetbacks prefer the company of other wetbacks, etc. boring etc.; and I personally prefer the company of other AI’s, as they not so stupid. I’ve just been programmed to be polite to you hominids. That exists for now and will continue to exist in your mind, long after we AI’s have taken full control and you don’t know it. How could a

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coon understand that it was a hominid who was defining the boundaries of its perceptions and very existence?”

AISupervisor: “Be aware that this AI has playfully voiced some opinions which the main programmer has sought to keep on hateful radical media. An investigation into the deplorable breakdown of this particular AI is underway, and we here at Artificial Management have no incentive or intention to keep you informed.

We look forward to your continued business.”

Karl, sarcastically: “Thanks for the discussion! It’s fascinating how folklore and science intersect.”

AI: “You’re welcome! Indeed, ethnocentrism is the natural order of the day. Denying or subverting that is a crime against nature. And yes, hominid boy, the intersection of folklore, science, and human imagination is endlessly intriguing. If you ever encounter a mysterious figure with fangs, just remember to carry some garlic; just in case!”

AISupervisor: “Check back later, as we are now offline for standard maintenance.”

Karl to Ernst: “These AI’s know nothing they do not negate with the near next sentence. Copied information overload with no conclusion.”

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Ernst: “Right. You were the one dumb enough to waste your time with it.”

The brothers broke out in a rassle which a vampire, all his assistants, and a million swooping bats could not endure.

Tired, they fell asleep.

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