I wonder if I will ever connect the two parts of myself that play out Micha’s drama. I think I would get a sense of profound healing if ever I could connect these two parts; connect the image with the pain.
Right now, and how marvellous is the human psyche, I either scream in pain where all is dark, or I see images and feel nothing except profound sadness. Or, is it that each resides in a different ‘compartment’
and therefore cannot be connected? Though I think that the nature of Network is to connect the two.
The pain on the right side of my head must have an origin. Since it was intensified at the last clear day, I can assume that it is connected to Micha. I wonder if I will ever have enough courage to go through such intense pain, so that I may reach the other side of my heart chakra.
The meditation at the Shakti Gawain lecture was all about sitting in total darkness and then reaching out through the heart chakra.
This adventure is most mysterious and so wondrous. It is filled with pain, yes, but also it brings a sense of cosmic energy dancing through me. I am slowly finding its rhythm. Slowing, dancing to its tune. Slowly moving to its all-loving source of direction.
Nov. 14, 2000 (Computer Journal)