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The Luciferian Book

Lucifer Damuel  White

The Luciferian Book

2/12/2023, Lucifer Damuel  White

A new public domain book.

A Public Domain Luciferian Group Questionnaire:

What is life about for you? What are your best attributes and what are your worst problems? Are your problems minimal or potentially problematic?

What do you support the most? What steps have you taken to be the best among your kind?

What are your dreams? What steps have you taken to fulfill them in the last five years?

What do you like the most and what do you need the most? Do you have them around you at least most of the time?

What is your prime creation? What was the one thing that you have made which is the best among all the others?

Is there anything you would bring into the world that has not been in it before? What unique contribution would you make in life?

Do you generally get along with others? Are you strong enough to deal with difficult people?

Would you say you are emotionally well off? That things like stress and depression are minimal?

Are there any obstacles in your life that are preventing you from having the best life that you can have?

What have been the top 5 or the top 10 influences in your life? What impact did it make on who you are today?

Was your childhood a pleasant one? Did you go on vacations, celebrate your birthday and holidays, or was there a lot of disappointment and resentment from your parents?

Do you ever fear that the past will come back to haunt you?

Do you have any unreasonable phobias?

Do you wish there was more time in the day and when you wake up each morning are you happy that a new day has begun? Or are things not like that for you?

Is there anything that rules over your life: such as rules from others, a spouse, a partner, a religion, or group?

Are the things you like the most largely popular or are they things that are less commonly known?

If you could learn one talent fully in a day’s time, what would it be?

What is your regard for the future? What are the things you look forward to the most?

Do you find yourself using a lot of hateful words within your mind? Do you often strive to minimize others?

What kind of people do you attract? What are the kinds of people you bring into your life just by being yourself?

Are you generally patient? Are you able to bear a line that is taking a long time or do you feel yourself erupting inside when that happens?

Of all the people that have been in your life, who do you feel you hate the most? And why? Also: who has been the greatest love in your life (or the person you cared about the most) and why?

What was the most wasteful period in your adult life and what was the most productive period in your adult life? What did you do and what kept you from doing anything during those times, respectively?

Are your tastes broad– are there many things that you enjoy? Or are the things you enjoy constricted to but to a minimal?

Do you lose hope easily? Do you find yourself disbelieving that a thing very likely to happen is not going to?

Have you overcome your behavioral problems in life, if they ever existed to begin with? Would you say that you have matured in life over becoming a bad person?

Is the area you live in generally clean or generally messy? Do you take pleasure in cleaning small things here and there? Or does it tend to accumulate into a problem for you?

Do you enjoy giving things to people but still have all you need for yourself?

If there is anything you have failed at, what is it? What was a pivotal thing in life that you failed to see your way through?

Do you believe that people need people, that nobody likes being alone, or do you believe that time is best spent alone?

Do you believe that everybody deserves at least a little respect and are you a respectful person in general? Does it bother you to bother others?

How do you spend your money? Do you save any? Do you mostly budget things? Do you have all you need through it? Do you have any to begin with? Do you spend it a little at a time or in large amounts at once?

Are you able to say “no” to people? Are you able to reject their requests and give them nothing? Or do you find yourself susceptible to hustlers?

Is there any chance that you would go to jail or prison for a very long time or are you the kind of person who would simply never do anything bad enough for that to happen? Are you the kind of person who would at worst be sentenced with a misdemeanor?

Where does your pride come from? What are you most proud about concerning yourself? What is a thing that puts you above the rest?

What are the most unique things in your room? What are things in it that most people do not own but you do?

If you could be better than anyone else, whether you know them personally or not, but if you could be better than that person, who would that be? Have you done anything to make that a possibility?

If you could own ten things– no matter the cost, what would those ten things be?

The Ritual Of Strength

You will need: a bitter drink, a sweet drink, two chalices, a bell, a dagger, paper, a new set of clothes, and a blanket. The chalices: one a cheap cup, another an expensive cup. It will represent personal worth. The bell can be any loud percussion instrument. The new set of clothes represents your new self. The blanket represents your weaker self. The bitter drink represents your problems. The sweeter drink represents your “better self.” You write on the paper those things that are keeping you down. You write on it anything that has power over you. You stab that with the dagger. You do not fully drink the bitter drink. You pour some of that on that same paper. With the bell your power “rings out.” It signals a new you. Take the sweet drinking cup and meditate on the thought “my blood is blue.” And wrap yourself around the blanket, lay for a while, while letting in spiritual help, in a within-the-womb sort of way. Cast off the blanket when you are ready. Put on the new clothes when you are ready.

That’s all you need to know with the ritual really. There is no exact way of doing it and these instructions are enough. It is a ritual of entering into a stronger form against a previously weaker one.

The Isosociety

Isosociety is a term meaning “isolated society.” It is a social structure where people mostly stay indoors. It is a naturally occurring thing. As people find themselves in places that contain the things they love the most within their home. Things that other places do not. That goes as far back as video game consoles going in and arcades going out. When drones begin to deliver our things and all that is speeded up, an Isosociety is that much further along. I welcome such a society.

What A Great Future!

What a great time we are living in. Much better is yet to come too. Human beings are entering into their god state. Earth was our prison for untold amounts of time. In the beginning we had nothing beyond sharp stones. For so long all we could appreciate were spices for our food and shiny rocks. Now gold is in our circuit boards. The later we have come onto this planet the better the souls we were in Heaven, with less the penalty paid (for most part.)

        Something I had been waiting on for a while not only came about robustly but out of the blue, too. That is, AI that can make things for people: art, books, even computer programs. No doubt CGI will be used by it soon to create all new movies! That is just too cool. If you know how I feel right now, I am just surprised how one day you hear nothing about such a thing and the next it is all over the place. So with what is yet to come I look forward to it.

Society Problems

People are going backwards while science is going forwards. So many are on the anarchy band wagon. The more they bring along the less likely they will be punished. So they think anyway. Being such a way leads to a far greater problem: like police states, martial law, and dictators. These people break down society in ways that can only be fixed by those things. Not really a fix but you know what I mean. Unruly people, people that can be defined as “uncivil,” dim in the head, faulty in their thinking, will not go very far before the laws become tougher and they are all scooped up at once and must pay the price of lawlessness.

        Don’t be like them. Be mature. Be patient with people. Turn the other cheek if it keeps you from being beaten down. Be blameless and you will see your way through. That is the best you can do.

        A Luciferian is mature to begin with. These are like Satan’s children in the new age. As Christinaity and religion in general has either been abandoned or bent out of shape, the production of Satan’s children is the result. You can see that reflected very well on TV and in music. There is no mistaking that it is all Satanic, from light doses to heavy ones. See, Satanism grows fast. Hedonism is the rule of the day. Money. The worldly. Just like children that are spoiled are Satan’s children. They’ll grow. It’ll take a while, but they will grow.

Being Worldly Is Luciferian

Expand upon those things that you like. Broaden it. Increase them. You will have more to love.

Look forward to the future. Be well in knowing that science and technology will lead to a utopia.

Fully enjoy things. Do not merely eat and chew up. Enjoy your food. Your drinks too. Those things that please you, be pleased more by.

Look for the best life and the best things in it. Turn away from what is bad. Turn to what is good.

Invite no one in your life that obstructs it. Invite no harmful person in. Less they contribute to it, cut them loose.

Look for the next pleasure and grab onto it. Be in a sea of happiness.

There is a lot in this world to appreciate. There is always a new thing to find and enjoy. Keep yourself safe with where you go and when. Be cautious of bringing the wrong kinds of people into your life. There are some on a lost route. Be on a path you know well, one you have designed yourself. One you have paved for yourself, and therefore nobody has any right to take it from you. No one has the right to force their way into a life you made for yourself that you made yourself. I had a parent who threw me out of the house. I went far away to another city and state. I established my life here after being homeless for a year. I have a life I made on my own and that is a good enough reason for me to include who I will and who I will not.

Hustlers: The second I am asked for something is the second I say no.

Lies: The only time I make them is when another would use the truth against me.

Drugs dealers: “I don’t have any money.”

Gambling: He didn’t buy a lot of tickets but after years of occasionally buying them he won a great sum.

Alcohol: I wish I was no longer drunk.

Education: Who needs teachers when we have the tech that we do today.

Money: It does  buy happiness.

Hateful people: They will eventually anger the wrong person.

Androids: Ethical slavery.

A Utopia: Only possible with science and technology.

Atheism: So it all just fell into place?

Communism: “All for society.” But what is society?

History: Can be about TV and video games, too.

Diversity: No one may have a place of their own.

Great People: Hide dirty minds.

Showering: If only we could smell ourselves!

Money: You can’t have your cake and eat it too.

Jobs: Only require patience.

Clocks: The only thing in your room that you stare at.

Jail: A favorite place for some.

Music Videos: In the days of MTV and VCRs I enjoyed them.

The Park: A place without TV.

Religion: Sooner or later a person is going to make a cult out of it.

Tea: A thing that people drink only because they do not like sugar water.

Fast Food: The fastest way to spend money that vanishes after you do.

Gold Rings: I can’t afford a thousand dollar ring so I got two $500 ones.

New Clothes: The best way to start a new life.

A Dark Age: With our science and tech, no longer dire.

Inflation: But I can see things getting both better and cheaper. Things evolve.

Wealth: I own things that the richest people did not even only ten years ago.

Tastes: The more you enjoy the more you have to enjoy.

The Apocalypse:  A hope for some, especially the homeless.

Cursive: Is not faster and is not as good looking as regular writing.

Christmas: Santa Claus and Pagan trees.

Easter: Easter bunnies and Pagan eggs.

Rich Televangelists: God must have blessed me. Nevermind the poor. It’s all mine.

Controversy: Is no longer where people think it is. It left a long time ago.

Morality: Is still around, just in different forms.

Jesus: Little know this but he had bowel movements just the same.

Atheist Satanism: Sounds worse than my “Christian Satanism.”

Crystals: Have greater magical power than diamonds.

Self Defense: The right to self defense should include “excessive” self defense.

War: A thing that human beings enjoy too much and will look for an excuse to start one.

Buddhist Stores: A place to pray to idols for free.

A Fast Food Sign: An idol. Inside are beasts sacrificed for you.

The Radio and the CD: They stood the test of time better than anything else.

The CD: An interdimensional device made by humans.

Hell:

There are not many humans on this earth that knows exactly what hell is and what it is like. They have construed a very basic explanation and understanding of it– a human understanding of it. But hell is not at all what they think it is. Even fewer humans on this earth know what it is like being in hell. I can at best say what it is like. It is not a place that human beings can freely enter and leave. It isn’t a fiery place as in the flame of an ordinary fire. It is not a place of lawlessness and anarchy as we often think. Not as we often think.

        What hell is, is a different reality. It is being in a realm where thoughts are different. It comes about from a much more sensitive perception. You can sense the emotions behind what people say– those are exaggerated. Human beings sound moronic that way, or highly sexual, or annoyingly “cutesy,” for example. Where it is that they would sound normal to any human being of human understanding. This carries over quite a bit into music. You could draw a comparison of hearing the kind of music for the first time. Say you are from a foreign land and you hear, oh, Van Halen for the first time. It sounds like that every time when you are in hell. And you are in hell- hell is a state, not a place. Hell is a state of mind, a presence of something of a kind.

        Your senses are much more heightened in hell, too. You crave things like strong flowery scents. You crave food on a more beastly level. You drink the water from a tan of tuna and savor it, over dumping it down the drain. You are more likely to chug drinks as though you are quenching a great thirst. When you are in a shower it can feel quite luxurious. You end up drinking the water pouring down. Water that feels like a wonderful waterfall. Then there is TV. It is altogether immersive. You could watch things for hours that any ordinary person would tire of within a few minutes. There is a deepness to it. The narration is very involved. The same goes for the Radio as well. Whatever it is you enjoy on earth you enjoy many times more in hell.

        Fantasy is part of reality in hell. For ordinary existence magic is only partly effective but in hell it is a way of being. It is a thing within your reality that is very real and always at work. You hear spirits. You do things sometimes that have magical effects while if they were done by ordinary people it wouldn’t do anything. Thoughts and things are more easily shared whether someone in hell is close to your proximity or far away. You fumble around with electronics. You put a CD in backwards, you put the power into the headphone part, do this and that basically reversing everything and when you play the CD you hear demon voices in it. You go to a mirror and all of a sudden you start acting like a puppet. You see the face of the devil in your face, it grins, then disappears. Supernatural things are more natural in hell. Supernatural= natural. To them, ordinary living is more “sub-natural.”

        I once sat at a bench. There was a band playing in front of these benches. The music was so odd, so strange. To most people- that was just a band playing. But there was a demon in front of me. I was talking “to my voices” when “she” shushed me. I looked around for a moment then realized that the music was about the suffering of hell. The large crowd was ever passing by, and a sense of agony came over me. There are voices all around. There are voices that answer questions you might have. Once I was reading the Holy Bible and looking for the passage about Lucifer and a voice said “Isaiah 14” to me. Sometimes they are heard commenting about you. It seems like something they like to do: to evaluate you in a way. You get “mini” visions in your mind. As though someone is before you one moment and gone the next. You see things in the clouds that have a real world meaning behind them. The clouds for people in hell are not just things overhead. They can often be seen to have meaning. Then sometimes greater visions come to you. Even highly elaborate ones.

        It is natural for anyone to ask: “is he talking about being high on drugs?” My answer for that is: absolutely not. I have never taken drugs. Not once in my life. It is similar in some ways: the way that TV and music feels, I would assume. In all ways though? No. Drugs produce a “false” fantasy. Being in hell is being in a real fantasy. Drugs and magic do not go hand in hand. As has been said before: that is the drug, not you.

        These are the things that the Bible is talking about when it talked about things like “unquenchable thirst,” “being lost,” a “fire that never goes out,” “separation from God,” “a place of sorcerers,” and is a place where one never really understands who and what they are. They cannot answer the question of where they came from, where they are, and where they are going. Their reality is too fractured. It is full of “delusions” that are not delusions. It is apart from living in the truth as in what is the truth?

This Funny Mess That Humans Have Gotten Themselves Into

“Faster faster faster,” “and if you don’t do it right, then you’ll pay the price!” “You are (vaguely) breaking the law,” and by their mighty hand comes justice.. Over a trivial matter. These people known as Karens have gone from being few and far between to being everywhere. People used to be annoyed by long lines but they held their tongue and they certainly didn’t go into a rampage over it. A little should be forgiven. A lot should be forgiven. But it is asking too much to have them wait or correct an order of something not cooked right. These holy rollers. You could say they have a very twisted kind of righteousness to them. Modern witch burners. Everyone is in the center of the universe. Others do not exist at all until they enter the room. Then poof! They exist. The queen steps forth. So roll out the carpet and be on your best behavior. It is so bad that they had to come up with a term that didn’t exist before in all of human history: a Karen.

        Then there are The Cultsters. The Cultster  is my word meaning “cult making/enforcing gangster.” These are the woke things. The anti-in-tolerance things. Things called cancel culture and things that are intricately anti-racist. They cannot answer things such as “what is a woman?” That is why a rather tall man was allowed to swim with the women in a swimming competition and won. It was shameful for the second place person and not a soul was allowed to speak out against it. He was a woman! It is all a big mess. It is a cult. If you think or speak against it you’ll be met with its members in full fury. Might lose your job. Might be met with aggression. They have cult terms just like any other cult does. It includes brainwashing. Is a cult through and through– an assessment that should not be too hard to come up with. As for me, I am not worried about it. TV and such things do not accurately portray ordinary people. People live in their own world with their own rules apart from it. It hasn’t caused me any personal problems. I am much more of a blending in type of person. I will pretend to agree with anything if it keeps something from coming back to bite me. My only lesson here is: do not be brainwashed by it all. Pretend to be. That’s fine. But don’t be in any actuality.

        There has been a mass shooter problem in modern times. There has been rampant theft too. We went in a month’s time from it being rare to it being common. What a difference a day can make, for sure. The kind of theft where people just load up a bag and walk out with it. A person is not right in the head to grab as many clothing items they possibly can and walk out with it. The pit of Abaddon has been open, with evil spirits leaving it and entering into human beings. You must save yourself. You must keep control over yourself. Maybe that is an entirely easy thing for you and if so, great. If not then I would say take your heart out of doing crime, no matter what your reasons are, it is not good reasoning.

        If we are to make it through the tribulation brightly and safely, then we must act maturely and refrain from participating in foolhardy behavior, no matter how large the crowd is which is doing it.

Things aren’t so dire. It is a people lost: don’t worry about where they are going. Believe me, their place is already prepared. Nothing that a few good laws cannot fix. Nothing that science and technology cannot mend. One radical advancement in tech can improve the lives of people in great ways, enough to cultivate better behavior. Counter culture becomes common. We establish what is controversial only to smash it apart, eventually. The world was once dictated by Christianity. Now look at it. See the ridicule and resentment of it. See how thoroughly people do not abide by its terms anymore. And the same thing can happen to any other established thing. No rules are forever rules. Things change. Things change enormously. I am sure that if you enter into the future just 30 years you would see people with thoughts and behaviors, personal values and mentalities entirely foreign to what you have been taught.

Real Enlightenment

People with great sayings aren’t always great themselves. Some of what they say is “lofty headed.” That is, thoughts that are neat but don’t have any real use in life. The logic that comes from them only works half the time. Sometimes people struggle to make it work at all. Real thought-solutions are those that work and function well. A person comes up with their own, picking from what is there, and often even inventing their own. The multiple perspective thing. Perspective helps us along. We like one perception over another. They are those that turn thoughts from good to bad in the best way. They are different for everyone.

        It is good practice to wash away bad thoughts (anything “negative”) as much as a person can. For me this means “pacing” (pacing is a dirty word for it.. It is not a thing of nervousness for me.) But walking back and forth thinking in a certain way. A bright sided way. An optimistic one. A pride-gaining way. A “silver lining in the cloud” and a “count my blessings and gratitude” sort of way. As such I deal with mental problems strongly and thoroughly. Not in a weak and quick way.

        The answers we look for are simple. What makes us happy and what makes things bad for us? What should we improve on? What should we focus on? What are we best at? What are the things that disrupt us? What are the things that make our life better? Very simple questions though the answers are the important part. We could drastically improve our lives instead of letting them remain as-is, by taking chances. We would then look back on the past and say “I am so happy that I made that decision back then.”

        With me it’s a case of all’s well that ends well. I was a person that was always moving from place to place. I struggled to get my life together. Was even homeless awhile. I didn’t stop until I found the best of places to live, which is where I live in San Francisco, having come from New Mexico. I don’t regret my past. My past brought me to where I am today. It is because of my more recent past that I took upon writing so many books, of which there are now more than 50 of them. There was a time when I was wandering around hoping for the best for my one and only book. I guess if I was homeless again or in jail again I could at least have the knowledge that there are so many of my books out there circulating around. To be online in a way, even when I cannot be.

        Who wants a mediocre life? Who wants to live a life like everyone else. Having a medium level job? Never reaching the upper class? Never having accomplished anything? This is the day you may take or this is the day you may pass up. The Luciferian is meant for better things and they will get them by trying and by their very nature. It is a worldly religion. It is one of success. Of becoming greater. It goes against any enemy you have ever had. It puts you above them. It makes you stand out among your own. To be the most successful among your group or family. It can be financially rewarding, giving you the kind of life that most will never know. So have the spirit of competition. Have the will and the ability to become greater. Think deeply into such things, and you just might accomplish “the impossible.”

Visualization Magic

We are made in God’s image and like God we can create with an image, if that makes sense.

Unfortunately what most would teach you about visualization is short sighted and small minded. I am talking about the “imagine a beach” stuff. Visualization should not be restricted to a real-life setting. It should be allowed to roam free. When done right you will feel the power of certain things coming and moving before your eyes. When done right a tree= this, a door, that, and the wind something else. It is thinking of an object and having a thought for the object. Objects represent things, things you want them to represent. That is where your wishes reside. And you can combine objects as you combine thoughts/wishes. Music is a great help. It creates a flow and direction. When certain sounds return then so do thoughts. Visualization is simple in its basis but if done right it produces soul moving feelings. Use whatever music you want. Classical music, movie score music, video game music, black metal, ect. That is the magic of visualization and how it is done.

Promoting the Childish Aesthetic

When I look upon the city I see a field of dullness. When I look at the homes of people I see dullness. Nothing is ever out of the super-ordinary. Everything has its own plain color. Everything has its own design and so on. Then I see a landscape like from Blade Runner and think ‘that’ll never happen, people will not allow for so much imagination in their cities.’ I prefer brilliant lights. I prefer all the types of lights to be used: lasers, electro-luminescence, strobe lights, black lights, fiber optic lights, LEDs too, and even glow-fluid. I desire that things are more creatively painted. That they have different colors. That they have art on them. That people are allowed to put stickers all over them. To have holographic things here and there when that becomes feasible.

        Anything dazzling. Anything that brightens things up. Anything that gives life to them. Anything that is just a joy for the heart and the eyes. That instead of the dullness that cityscapes and homes suffer under. On the more creative side there are things like fog machines, mini tornado making devices, bubble makers, kites attached to a tall pole, and to simply light up the night time sky. Allowing a firecracker zone. A zone where people can shoot off night illuminating firecrackers. Tall swings are nice. More pools. Free arcades. Things like that.

        

Greater Freedom

I think that we should have the ability to more deliberately defend ourselves. I think that “excessive use of self defense” should not be a crime. It is not an error. It corrects bad behavior instead of letting bad people run rampant without fear. It gives criminals too much privilege.

        I believe everyone should have the right to be alone. I think that no matter where a person is, they should have that right. It would actually improve people in jail. When they are removed from bad influences and left without anyone but themselves, they will have time to think and change their ways.

        I believe that everyone should have a right to have their own kind of surroundings. If they want to be among people who use drugs, then they can. If they want to be in an area where it is strictly prohibited and far away from drug users, they have it. If they want to be in a religious environment of their choice then they can live in such an area as that. Areas where people can’t come in to mix things up.

        I believe that people should have the right to be strong without being pinned as “aggressive.”

        I think it should be illegal to film and harass the mentally ill.

        I might be wrong, but I favor dirt roads over paved ones. The money saved. And more powerful vehicles could be made to tread over it. I think that accidents happen. That when people get out on the road they should understand they are taking a risk.

        I believe in less restrictions. I believe in the freedom to create. In such a way as that I am anti-bureaucratic. I think that harm reduction is a good thing. I am also against keeping people super-safe. If someone wants to make a dumb or poor choice then let them, so long as no others are being unwillfully harmed.

        I believe in universal basic income. While it is said that androids, robotics, drones, AI, ect., is “taking jobs from people,” it is these sorts of things that lead to universal basic income. A guaranteed income for all is becoming more feasible all the time. We just need to increase certain resources. That can be done through science and technology. I also believe that science and technology should be the biggest part of a governmental budget. These are things that are permanent solutions, not temporary ones.

        I believe that everyone has the right to at least a little respect.

        I believe that major corporations should not hold a monopoly on what can be said and cannot be. If they are restricting what we say it is no different than the government doing it to us. Our rights are not quite there because of it.

        I believe that the choice of a death penalty should be given to the family members of the victim. That if even one major family member (let's say siblings, parents, or children to the victim) decides they should be given the death penalty, then so be it.

        I want a better world. I am a philanthropic person. I have a lot of faith in progress. Especially as related to science and technology. I believe that people should not be hampered or bothered in general. To be generally free and can count on that. That unless it is a bad crime then some leniency should be granted. That especially if the crime was not a violent one or harmed another or put a gun to another’s face or some such thing. The fact is, the best nations have the most gentle prisons and a bad prison takes a criminal and makes them worse.

I would like the Isosociety to come about just as well as could be. That will come about when in home things only get better. That will come about when drones can deliver our things. That will come about when in-home-to-another communication develops.. Made more realistic. Where even a holodeck comes about. And other certain things seem to make it certain.. An Isosociety will come about.

        The demand of being left alone has never been so strong..

The Joy of Magic

Visualization can be a lot of enjoyment. I have already covered that but can add something to it: taste magic. As I stated, visualization is about deeply meaningful “objects” in your mind. Taste magic adds foods and flavors to it. You simply combine the thought with its own taste. It is sort of like a non Christian comunion. It is a magic based one instead.

        I enjoy making prayer sheets. The principles behind it are simple yet it is about as versatile as things get. It is sprucing up a paper, including a tithe, and preserving it. Paper can be given ribbons along the border. You could use color pens. Could include images or drawings. You can turn the paper into an origami thing. For tithes I like to use foreign coins. I use gift tithes too, like little rose quartz stones or even a small troll doll. Preservation: you can laminate it, put it in a zippy bag and envelope, roll it into a scroll and place it in a bottle, among other things.

        Tarot cards: if you are especially creative you can make your own. With modern technology that should be much easier than it used to be. AI that turns words into art could probably be put to good use that way. “Goat-like devil, Adam and Eve below, star,” for example.

        Using dice. Getting 12 sided dice and doing a bit of numerology. Or getting dice that have images on them found in certain board games. Maybe even making an occult based board game. First to get to hell wins. Instead of a “go to jail” card, a “go to heaven” card.

        Making a devil-like action figure be your idol. Not one that you play with but one that you pray to. Having a troll doll buddy in such a way.

        Making music be about whatever you want it to be about. Even when it has nothing to do with it as it was made. Some of my music is about Satan, yet it isn’t in any way heavy metal. Some of it is pop music. Similarly I have music that is about God, as a song for Him.

        Drawing your idols. After all, those things you draw are idols. In the far past people would draw up scary images of devils. Those were as much idols as those things we draw based on movies and video games.

        You can have a Halloween tradition. One where you listen to a particular metal song on that night. You can take advantage of the pencils on sale at that time (the kind with an orange eraser and black cats on them) to use for the writings in your book of shadows.

        You can make a magical device out of electronics. A light here, a crystal there, power to that, double mirrors, spinning triple mirrors, magic symbols going back and forth, and software that produces rituals. Or having a ritual not being done by you but by figures, figures with little cups, holding up swords, He-Man perhaps, and his little robed friend. Or instead of using electronics, inventing new musical instruments that are designed for occult use: producing that precisely diabolical sound you are looking for.

        Then there are things like making new symbols. I have my favorite two on the cover of this book. Depending on what you like to make and are able to, you can always create your own magical tools, devices, and so on.

Things That Go Against Common Sense

Being weak doesn’t serve anyone well. People that way are not treated gently. You would think that having a lot of respect would bring you respect. That isn’t often so. You think that by talking to someone it draws them closer, especially with the use of loving words. They don’t like you for that. They like you for not being around enough. You think that by doubling down on your love for a person and expressing it that it would be welcome. It isn’t. Going about strongly serves you better. I am not talking on the level that you start a fight, but on one where you let your presence be known, even if subtle. What people hate they love, in certain ways at least. That gives them a sense of being better than you are. After all, if they are good and strong enough to bother you to begin with..

        You would think that by working as hard as you can that your boss would appreciate you more. No, that just gives him or her greater liberty to charge you with more. The guy that they know will do every last thing they say. That instead of the other person who is probably going to argue with her/him.

        So I say be hated. Be feared. Be bold. Be uncaring. Be unconcerned. Be daring. Defend yourself greatly. Be absent. Be unobtainable.

        Bragging is another thing that doesn’t have the effect we think it does. The person right away has the opposite thought about it. That is another area where subtlety works well. Throw out a hint about what you have accomplished over elaborating on it.

        Don’t spoil your children. They will not love you for it. They will, in fact, hate you for it. Such a thing as that can ruin their life altogether. I am not at all saying don’t give anything to your children. I’m just saying that birthdays and holidays are a better time. Chores teach them to work. And go on vacations too. Buy all the school clothes they need. Shelter and feed them. But discipline them for doing wrong. Gifts given all the time are not really gifts.

        What does begging do? If you plead with someone to give you something you come across as thinking they have something great. If they have something great then why should they give it to you? The same thing occurs when you are trying to talk yourself out of a problem. Such things make you out to be prey against a person who would have power over you.

An Examination of The Light, Dark, And Gray

To start out with the gray: it is a way of balance and moderation. That is a very important thing. It is a thing that even makes the worst things acceptable. It is a non sided thing. It is a both sided thing which isn’t really a side as such. It is detestable to some: people fight for their side and do what they can to improve and elongate it. I believe that the gray can be a thing where you go back and forth, so long as you are consistent with that, because it comes together as a greater whole.

        The light side of things is the philanthropic side. It is the side of things like love, care, and peace. When the light side fights it fights on the side of good. It fights for reasons such as greater rights. It fights against evil rulers. Unfortunately it can be a long time coming for such a force. They would look for every route possible to preserve peace and are a kind of people that are slow to fight, by their nature.

        The dark side is the selfish side. It is the side that may freely lie to others and deceive them. It is a best-gain-possible philosophy. There are people in this world that do not care about the life of another and if they have to kill a person for their car then they will. It’s a horrible thing. There are perverted people in this world that enslave others. There are truly monsters in this world.

The light sided live in a kind of life that is apart from the dark side people and hopefully they will live a life without being victimized by it. But according to their friends and company they live in a world apart from them. But bad people, very bad people, might be only a few blocks away from good people at any given time. A large reason why we have laws is we need our loved ones to be protected. It goes beyond the need of only our own protection. That is why anarchy cannot work. We will always choose and empower our protectors.

I am talking about extreme things. To the less extreme there are these to consider:  a person can sin and not be a bad person. Don’t get me wrong. It’s why I support the gray side and am in it myself. It draws a line between the extremes. Instead of calling this “somewhat light sided,” and “somewhat dark sided” let's call it what it is: being gray sided.

The light can last a thousand years and take as much time to be fully put forth. The dark side can come quick and develop quickly. We have seen just that in the world. Where rock became metal and anything is permitted in movies for example, all happening too quickly. The gray side follows. It was necessary that light and dark first were before gray could come about. And it is more and more. I believe that before long it will be a hot topic and a lifestyle embraced by many.

        Drawing a line means not being too bad but not too good. Drawing a line means enjoy yourself, just be responsible. Drawing a line means that you can make mistakes, it does not mean you are damned. Drawing a line means that laws are tough but not unreasonable. Drawing a line means you can have horror movies, it doesn’t mean you are going to mimic it. Drawing a line means not taking things too far, not taking things too short, but meeting everything in the middle. What philosophy is more perfect than that?

The Satanic Is More Spread About Than We Realize

There was a time when the Smurfs were fought against. With its sorcery and occult undertones it offended quite a lot of Christian parents in a more Christian time. Lots of things in the 1980s did the same thing, from troll dolls to D&D. That was a sudden rush of the Satanic– the more openly Satanic. It was a time of Slayer music and such things. I was a kid and teenager fully into it all. I liked things like the Warlock movie and heavy metal such as Slayer, Danzig, and Morbid Angel. All it needed was controversy and the right to produce it to begin with, and it certainly was. They pinned a parental advisory on it and called it a day.

        Things in the 90s kind of shifted to the gangsterly after that. People began to prefer it over metal. With that I sort of slipped away myself and it’s a miracle I didn’t hurt anybody or wound up in prison. They glorify the worst of things. But I say that rock and roll is also Satanic. I say that many non secular songs are Satanic. We live in a time where we may freely ridicule Jesus and Christianity. It isn’t that way with any other religion, either. If we did the same against a Buddhist or something else we would be met with condemnation. There must be a force against Christianity. There is, it is Satanism. All manner of sexuality and the morally corrupt is present in video games, shows, cartoons, music, and books of today. It has become a natural presence for us and like an old friend told me once, “controversy is cheap.” All we have left to create is a coffee shop called “I Love Satan’s” complete with Satanic symbols on the disposable cups.

        The Satanic is given more rights while the Christian is given less. The voice of the Christian is always being muffled and met with contention. I am not saying it is right, but I am not saying it is wrong either. I had to deal with an abusive person in grade school that threatened to swat me if I did not pray to Jesus. I had a Navajo Witchcraft book that I brought to school. A book that came from my friend from a different school. The teacher probably burned it in a fire in some kind of indignant way. I say that on the basis of what it has done, the worst evil that ever existed in the world was Christianity. With all of its horrible cults, brutal executions, moral oppression, and stifling nature, I have no doubt. If they tell me “it isn’t that way any more,” then I tell them, “that’s because you are no longer allowed to.”

        I think that things are better under Satanism. It comes with responsibility but people are no longer killing in the name of God (or at least not so much.) These Bible-said things are no longer oppressing the rights of women. These Bible-said things are no longer enabling people to harm the LGBTQ. Not lawfully.

        We are free to create. We are free to produce the kind of music that we have. We can make our movies be about what we want them to be about. We can have all the fun we want in doing so. There was a time when Christian music had to be Dorian and there was a time when the organ was considered too Satanic for the Church. Those days are gone.

Joy of The World And Your Favorite Things

Worldliness is one of the best components to Satanism. Being “against the world and its things” is distinctly Christian. It is a thing mentioned again and again in their scripts. So then, worldliness is Satanic. After all, it is Satan’s world. Their Bible says that too. It says things like “who loves the world is not loved by The Father.” I think that worldliness is the best thing within the Satanic lifestyle. There is more to love about the world than ever. We are surrounded by great treasures. We can find just about anything we want online. There is always a new device and more and more incredible new things are emerging. Science is even coming closer to extending our lives indefinitely. It is a field of science that is not researched enough, but we are getting there. Things like cellular renewal or whatever that requires– could be a handful of things coming out from the minds of scientists. My friend once told me “you cannot trump God.” Am I an enemy to God? Do I deserve death and suffering? I wonder sometimes. I wonder if “God’s Kingdom” is just what is coming about on Earth only with God in it. A paradise of things as brought together by our total knowledge. It is us who did the work. It is us who brought it with us with death behind us. If that is what God’s Kingdom is, then you can count me in and count on me renouncing Satan altogether, if that is what it takes. If it takes bending my knee to Christ and declaring him Lord and God’s Son and the rest, then I will. If I bowed to The Beast I would be singing “London Bridges Falling Down” in my head.

        My favorite things include valuable rings. One of my rings is a gold snakeskin ring. It took about all the money I had in hand for a month but is something that will last forever. I’ll be an old man and still have that ring. I also like Jade. It is just unique and holds a special place in my heart for reasons I don’t really know. I like black pearls. Of course a Satanist is going to prefer black pearls. I like it all except for Turquoise. I think that turquoise is ugly. It's rather cheap, too. I like rose and blue quartz. I like diamonds most of all. They say that dogs are man’s best friend and a diamond is a girl’s best friend. But the diamond is mine too.

         There is this 50s style diner I like to go to. It has 50s music and things like that. It is my favorite restaurant in all of San Francisco. They make a damn good Reuban sandwich. The best I ever had. I can’t say so much about their potato salad, the only side dish to it that I want. My favorite pizza toppings are mushrooms, pineapple, black olives, and green peppers. I like the thick pan style. I like fried mushrooms quite a bit. I am more of a drinking person most of the time. I don’t even get hungry until later in the afternoon. If the food isn’t good I’d rather not eat at all. I consume sugarless iced tea more than anything else. As for alcohol, I never really become drunk. I don’t lose my judgment and those things. It just makes me feel woozy. It isn’t a feeling I like either, wishing to be sober again.

        There should be a material stipulation to copy right if people want it. That is, to create a list of your favorite things. When anyone uses your copyrighted material then they have to buy you something from that list. Can be a little from it or a lot. The list can be exact or be broad. Those using your copyright will mail you one of those things.

        Here is my list of favorite things: green marbles, little green army men, devil like action figures, troll dolls, figurines, D&D figures, board game pieces, EL panels, electronic components, old video game manuals and magazines, old mechanical games, water flutes, early 90s trapper keepers, fanny packs, cargo pants, english Manga, anything that glows in the dark, eye of providence necklaces, mood rings, gems and precious metals of all kinds, outdoor sandals, mp3 players, pocket radios, twelve or 24 sided dice, color pens, writing materials, black tea, oolong tea, sigil of Lucifer stuff, quality ribbon, sewing and tailoring stuff, leather goods and leather working tools, tarot cards of different designs, 100% cotton blankets, sheet protectors, binders, printers and ink, digital picture displays, plasma TVs, POGS, classic TMNT stuff, retro gaming posters, old video game consoles and games, especially NES, Game Boy, and SNES, stencils, especially alphabetic, 5 star notebooks, rubber stamps and ink pads, stickers, fiber optic lamps, dry erase boards and markers, black cat clocks, halloween pumpkin buckets and pencils, NFL pencils, 49ers things, thermal printers, dot matrix printers, large box PC games of old, StarBucks cups, pouches and special storage containers, a jewelry box, tobacco pipe, bic lighters, menthol, and for food:

        Baklava, fried mushrooms, Reuben, fried: zucchini, shrimp with cocktail sauce, biscuits with white gravy (lots of pepper), pan style pizza, steak and A1 steak sauce, chiles rellenos, meat loaf, onion rings, fried catfish, peach cobbler, chili, caramellow, sweet tarts, pigs in a blanket, ketchup, fried corn dogs, cheese cake, peanut butter fudge, apple pie and whip cream, half and half milk, pumpkin seeds, pistachios, pistachio pudding, coconut, coconut cream pie, little debbie snacks, butter pecan pie, philly cheese steaks, milky way bars, roasted green chile, brownies, donuts, corn on the cob, orange chicken, red velvet cake, strawberry cake with lemon frosting, sharp cheddar or extra sharp cheddar, and potato bread.

        For drinks I like: cherry cider, guava soda, rice water, lemon sugar iced tea, plain black tea, oolong tea, moringa tea, black coffee, sprite, sugar soda, orange soda, half and half milk, eggnog, orange cool-aid , energy drinks that have sugar in them, gatorade (with sugar), and Kombucha with its regular alcohol content (as opposed to it being reduced.)

        Those are some of the things I like. Why have this list? You never know if someone may read it and help you out. Maybe in God’s kingdom I can have these, who’s to say?

Whoever you are, always treat yourself. You never know if it might be taken from you. Plan a good trip for the day. Take yourself to some special place. You might think hard and long about one particular thing you want and not be decided on it until it is just right. Then, go out and get it. There’s always music from your favorite musician to hear. There is always that next great movie to watch that you haven’t seen yet. There is always something new to create or to start creating. There’s always a new thing to learn. There’s always a new book to pick up. Whatever it is, and whatever your tastes are, there is something waiting for you, even at this very moment. I hope and pray that life is going well for you and continues to. I pray for you to be blessed with the unexpected.

The Magical and Supernatural Undertones In People’s Lives

It might be a strange occurrence when you see a friend for the last time. In a way such as you are about to leave town without saying goodbye, and there they are at your last stop before leaving. It might be that they make a rare visit to your place and die shortly after: something or someone was wanting you to see them one last time. Something or someone was wanting you to tell them goodbye.

        It could be spontaneously coming upon a group as though you were sent to them. It could be an instance that was seemingly fabricated for your future and new life. It could be that you miraculously survived something. It could be that you were playing on the piano and suddenly came up with a really good tune. Especially if it was as though the whole piece wrote itself.

        It could be that a thought was put into your head. Something irresistible. Something that leads to a lot of writing or ideas. It could have been a thought that led to a great scientific advancement, a new religion, a new philosophy, and so on. It could be that while in the middle of painting you gave up, smeared the canvas with your hand, and suddenly an amazing image appeared.

        It could be winning the lottery twice. It could be that a certain person recognized your talent and approached you about it, leading you to a lucrative career. It could be that you were let off of a job for a reason, as it led to a great new one elsewhere, a place where your creativity could thrive. It could be that your magical ritual was far more powerful than you realized, changing the course of the world, whether quickly or much later.

        It could be that great changes were needed in your life to get you on the path you were meant for. Anything that stopped stagnation. Anything that got you going in the direction you were meant to be going. It could be that the heavens were testing you, placing you in situations to see if you would do good or bad. There was a time when I was starving. I could basically only afford shelter in a hotel. So I knocked on the manager’s door demanding a hot pocket. I thought it was wrong of him to not give me one. More recently my neighbor at this entirely different hotel asked for a hot pocket from me. Out of the blue: a hot pocket. After I said no, I realized that I did no wrong and neither did the manager at that old place. It was like the time I threw away a gift from someone because I couldn’t pawn it. A little later down the road I gave a friend a video game console that had a frayed wire. It still played games. Then, one day, I happened to be in the video game store at the same exact time that friend was. He was trying to sell it to them but they wouldn’t take it because of the wire. He yelled at them “just throw it away then!” My reaction was being tested. I in fact didn’t mind that he did that.

        I was brought to a friend to see them one last time. She went to the front door of the hospital. I don’t know why she was there. She just so oddly approached me at the front door and then went back inside as though she knew I was there.

        If you look for visions you will find them. That isn’t even too hard to do. One day I was looking up at the clouds and saw that it looked distinctly like a body laying down in repose. I pointed up at it and told a friend about it who said “that’s just a cloud.” But on the news later there were people who said they saw the same cloud shortly after their friend (maybe it was a family member, I don’t recall) and they knew that he was in heaven.

        If you were called for a purpose then you can expect that things will come together a certain way for you. Your very life will have guided you into a great thing you may accomplish. Whether it is scientific or religious, or something else. It can be just about anything. For me it was Christian Satanism, and perhaps more. I had gone back and forth from the two more times than I could count. You might even miraculously escape death on a number of occasions because your purpose is so important. You might be taken to hell and back in order to qualify and in order to know what things you need to know. There are lessons for such people throughout life.

        I was at a time inside “the hole” for a month’s time. I am talking about a small rubber room without even a bathroom. I was insane at the time. I was writing with shit on the wall. I was writing with instant drink packets, mustard, and such things too. I never created such diabolical imagery in my life. I drew Satan himself and it is a figure I still remember. Later I was in a mental hospital and I prayed to eat beside Satan. We had assigned seats when we ate. Then this new guy comes in who was assigned to eat at my table. His name was Saturn. Only it was pronounced to sound like Satan. His name was pronounced Say-turn. It was subtle but noticeable.

        Your magic and prayers will come true. Keep praying for what you do, keep looking, keep asking, keep wishing. The more you notice these things the more they will be there. That is to invite more in. That is in showing appreciation. It is seeing something that looks back at you. If you don’t “look at it” then why should they or it show itself at all?

Comparing Your Past To Your Present, And Considering The Future

Have you been able to get into what you want to be into more, at this time in your life? Like with me, I once typed away on a Windows 95 PC in Microsoft Word. There was nothing I could do with the file. This was just before the internet started to roll out for everyone. Lots of hobbies and activities these days have been improved by things like it. I feel like I take it all for granted sometimes. But if I knew what I could do today, and the setting too (having more food and drinks than ever for example), then I think I would wait as impatiently as a person waiting on an enormous bank payment to come in. Now to think how much better the future could be. I have prepared for it, believe me. They say the 1990s was the last time before the world and its things all came together.

        People who write music have a lot of things at their disposal these days, such as notation software. When I was a teenager I was always creating classical music on paper, fleshing it out with a keyboard, but never able to fully understand it in my mind. My music teacher had perfectly printed out music. I asked him about that and he said that he used a notation software (Print Music) and I most eagerly looked it up and purchased it. I went on to write music with it for a long time. I got the update that let you put your music into MP3 format, and so onto CDs. I lost most of that music unfortunately. I shifted into writing and just never did save my files enough. It was so long ago that I was saving them on floppy disks, at least at first.

        I used to dream about how great video graphics are going to become. When the SNES came about the graphics astonished me. That is a thing about nostalgia. We can still enjoy old games. We can count them as among the best. But we cannot go back to a time when those graphics astonished us. Those graphics have long been outdone. So when we pop in Final Fantasy 3 our jaws don’t drop over the graphics (or sound) anymore. I’d later pop in Final Fantasy 8 for the same thing to happen. I guess there will come a time when graphics don’t impress gamers anymore because they’d already be as real as they can be. Mario has done all that can be done but there was a time when Mario flying was the greatest thing that ever happened in gaming.

        In your youth, living at home, you probably didn’t have nearly as much as you had today. Using your parent’s printer might have been special. I had Zelda’s overworld map copied by my father at his business. I had a box of junk I liked to play with, which were electronic components I would toy around with. Paper was a little bit more special to me, and pens. I didn’t do any chores but I got a small allowance. Enough to buy a classical CD, paper, and a few pens. I had a girlfriend a little older than me who had her first job. She was always making out budgets for the things she wanted. I noticed that in younger people. They like to make budgets. They have a job for the first time, so of course. I did the same thing myself when I started receiving money. Before that though, a 2 liter soda was a great thing to have. Using my parents computer was more of a privilege. As adults we have a large amount of things around us. I am in a small hotel room. It is packed with so many great things however. I used storage tubs and cabinets and things to keep it from looking like hoarding. But the moment I throw something away I find I need it and shouldn’t have.

        Pens I have a lot of. I have buckets full of them. Pens of different colors, maker pens, various kinds, and depending on the type of way I am writing and drawing they each have their purpose. Some are better for letters. Some are better for drawing. Some are better for labeling, and so on.

        I was just a teenager when I decided I would work on religious and occult things. I was always going over occult books. I knew the Bible very well. I was into certain Satanic books and magic, with metal music and other inspiration. But it was way too early for me to begin doing such things. When I was 19 I told an older friend that I wanted to make books of a philosophy kind and he told me to live a little before I did, to get some experience in life. He was right. I didn’t know it at the time. But he was right, and I could not have possibly had the things to say as I do now.

        Life as a kid though could not be better, unless you are someone who was abused. Hopefully you had vacations, celebrated holidays, had food, were treated well, and all else. It was a time when everything was prepared for you. Your food was made for you. Things of entertainment were always around. It was more enjoyable to begin with, like a kitten, like young life that has something new and amazing before them. You didn’t have to worry about holding a job. Other than school you just played video games and waited on your parents for more. You didn’t know that these things came at a cost, for your parents to work for it. You never worried about being homeless, or keeping things together. You had no responsibilities. Not a care in the world. Then you get to about age 16 and start to worry about getting a job. You are either going to be getting into college or having a menial job. It is a worrisome time for sure. The longer you work at it though the more natural it becomes for you. Most will want to start a family, to get married, to have children. Not me though. I would rather keep all my time, all my things, and all my life to itself.

        Our identities are very important in our teenage years and that continues until our mid twenties, for most. They can be quite silly or serious. They can be harmless things like being a vampire or warlock, or we could have bad influences that get us into trouble early on. Identities are easy to snatch up at this time and use. They are easily gotten from movies, books, and music. We just want to be something greater, something different, and there is nothing wrong with that. In fact I would bring the feelings right back if I could.

        We all want a life of greater significance, but where will it come from? From writing? Painting? Music? Inventing? Science? A good education? A good education is the surest route if it is that you get a degree that is in high demand. Be relentless and take every day to do something special. Even if you don’t break through then at least you tried.

        And who knows what the future may bring. That is something more true than ever. Maybe humankind can just retire someday soon. Maybe we can have robotics and drones and androids and things that do all of our work for us. Maybe we will have found a highly abundant and cheap form of energy and no telling what else. Things are rapidly developing, that’s for sure. I would like to see universal basic income someday soon. Greater crime deterrents too. The homeless being housed with 3D printed homes. Life itself elongated through science. I don’t think many of these things are far away and over all it is just hard to predict what surprising things may come about. It isn’t like I am the greatest inventor that ever was, able to think it up myself. So I just cannot know what such minds will come up with.

The Easy Path and The Hard Path

There aren’t any shortcuts. There is great luck, unpredictable luck. But there is no short path that is worth going down. Everyone is already trying to. It is a very crowded path. Not that it isn’t worth it and not that you might be able to become successful through it, but it should be met with at least a little doubt. People would do anything to be a YouTube star. They are willing to quit their jobs and entirely focus on it. I see new gamer channels trying to break through all the time. Some of my favorite guys on YouTube might only get a hundred views a month and a menial amount of money from it. I like to see them try though. Not that I like to see them fail, that’s not what I mean. I am just interested in their method and their approach. Actually I hope for their success. I see in them some very elaborately created style– a unique style, having come into it with a lot of thought. They will either sink or float. More and more the room is just too full for anyone new.

        Your goal should be to be better among your competitors. You should outdo them. You should do both more and better than them. It is the true field to compete in. Consider there to be two fields: the easy one and the difficult one. In the easy one people are just playing around. They enjoy it for sure, but it doesn’t accomplish much. There are far fewer people in the audience too. They love their little audience. It is a good enough reason to return. More people are watching the real competitors however. It is where the serious and devoted play. It is the arena of champions. It requires practice day and night. It requires a lot of thought and action, a lot of practice, and a lot of determination. Most will not even bother!

        There are those that sell stickers and baseball cards online. Then there are those that have their things sold by others. Like something they created, whatever it was. There is the person that sells the product and the person that makes the product. Sometimes the seller made the product. But they are never going to get any money really if they are the only ones selling it. It is the difference between producing your own music CD or illegally burning a copy of other people’s music to sell.

        There are those that got into the game at just the right time. They are among the legends of today’s time. They were the first to make an affordable computer. They were the first to get into creating the newest tech, that established companies, that thrive to this day (if they’ve found the greatest fortune.) Sometimes it all requires the greatest talent. Sometimes you have to be born into it. Sometimes you have to have luck besides. So be where you most belong. We all have our place.

        I will tell you about my goals. My goal is to finally get my 60th book soon. I have taken no shortcuts along the way. In fact I have made things a little harder on myself in order to strengthen the quality of it. I have already written 60 books but by combining them I had reduced that number to 50. Just a few years ago it seemed like a distant dream but now it feels like one I could surpass. All the while my books are all free and in the public domain. My goal is to become famous. Not rich, but famous. I want to look online and see my books being talked about. I want to make a good difference in the world– a positive change. I want to be along the same lines of the greatest religious leaders that ever there was.

        I will tell you what I will not do, however. I will not “sneak my books” into a library hoping they catalog it. I saw a documentary about a person that did things like that. He snuck them into libraries to see if they would come across them and think ‘they forgot to catalog this one.’ Another thing he did was create a hundred or some enormous amount of copies and mailed them out to radio stations. He actually thought that the radio station people were going to read his book and praise it over air. Then he set up a book signing thing at some book store as though he was famous to begin with. Oh my God.

Propaganda

Propaganda is a great source of easy money. It creates a lot of not-for-profits. It creates a very big revenue for lots of people. They’d teach you to stop smoking. They will send cheap little packets and things. Things that others have put a lot of money in for them. Sometimes tax dollar stuff. But they’d do nothing for cancer research and treatment. They cannot lose their cause. So they will demonize vaping. Vaping is a thing that would take their jobs away. It would take away their purpose. Whether or not it is safer, it's got to go. They will strip away rights a little at a time. At first they are just warning about its harm. Then they will add to that it hurts everyone. Then it is harmful for the environment. Then it causes every ailment known to man. Then it is made to look like it is revolting and disgusting. They will recruit as many against it as possible. I would have switched to vaping but it was made illegal. The only thing I can even afford is “pipe tobacco” that I roll up. It happened with alcohol too, but the prohibition didn’t go far.

It is a thing happening with sugar. Maybe not so greatly, but noticeably enough. Sugary things are taxed. Health warnings against it are ever increasing. A person is made to feel like they are destroying their body if they have any intake of it. It is like McDonnald’s having to serve up apple pieces to children. I had McDonalds as a kid. I didn’t become morbidly obese. I had sugary cereal every morning for breakfast. I didn’t get diabetes. I used to drink a 12 pack of soda a week, and didn't die from it. I just don’t think it is anyone’s place to come onto TV and tell me to exercise. Being a spiritual person I am a more along-for-the-ride kind of person. My uncle stopped smoking and a few years later he died from a stroke while trying to blow up an air mattress with his mouth. From what I read, lung cancer is unlikely to occur before the age of 70, with the average cases occurring at age 75. And from what I read, diabetes is largely genetic. I have only one family member with it. She ate too much. She lived off of pies and things like that.

Dietary propaganda has gotten where they will tell you how much coffee you should or shouldn’t have. It must have been around the 60s that this nutritional stuff started. All they are succeeding at is making forbidden fruit.

I call all of these things “the new morality” and “the new sins.” Humans insist on having morality and sins. They replaced Christian virtue with virtues such as these. Most of it amounts to being as carefully healthy as you can. They get money for their causes. They preach the gospel of healthy living. The new life, the full life. They are our saviors.

Running A Church

A Satanist once told me, “be a priest.” He said that after understanding that I was a Satanist who appreciated Christian things. It was a big reason why I made Christian Satanism. I think that a Christian Satanic church would stand out greatly. I wouldn’t make one myself because it is not my kind of thing, to make and run a Church, to get that personal. I am at a distance kind of person who would rather write. I am just entirely unsocial. I don’t even care to email people. Would outright deny any interview, even one well paid for. I am not after it as a career either.

        Running a church might be a good career choice for you. I cannot deny the power of Christianity. It seems like every few blocks has a Church there. Every neighborhood for sure. Almost for sure, we will say. But Christian churches are all over the place. I wanted a piece of that power. I wanted a Christian denomination like no other. I believe I have in my hands The Final Denomination.

        People would turn their heads towards a Church whose sign reads “Christian Satanic Church” for sure. More than they would at some sort of Satanic church by itself. It irritates people. It sort of offends them. To think that the side they are on does not matter to this building right there. Could be dangerous in fact, and I would warn that it is.

        I guess you will need either a house or a building to start things off. Then to decorate it as well as you can. To fit it into the appearance of a church. To set up just how things will work inside. To have friends or associates you gathered, perhaps experienced, to organize how things will run and be operated. Coming up with a schedule. Doing some things the traditional way and bringing in new things if your ideas are good. You should have packets that explain the Church and things like that. You need scripture available which your Church teaches. Will you have music and what kind of music? Will you have statues, art inside, and other aesthetic matters should be taken care of. What is your tithing method? Will you conduct rituals of any kind? What will the clergy be made up of? Those are the most important things.

        Then to bring people in. Maybe just by the sign and obviousness of it alone will do. A good area will pay off. Some material on it is available and given out. Advertising. Word of mouth. Recruitment. Things like that. Then perhaps you will have a nice career as a Priest in whatever form of Church you would run.

Starting A Group or a Coven

I remember in high school we could create groups with the help of the teachers. There was some pushing for Wicca, which went well. There were some that were Christian, which certainly went well, but then there was me wanting to create a Satanic group, and I was strictly turned down. Satanism is always so forced into hiding. I was all into the “Satanic Panic,” I enjoyed it. I was an evil little teenager growing up listening to metal music and practicing witchcraft. There were those who would not take me seriously. I was just some guy pretending to be evil or something, to them. I wanted to be a part of a Satanic Sabbat, a part of a Satanic cult. I read that they were so hard to find and were so masterly secretive that they were unlikely to be found by anyone. They were practicing true magic, calling on the Devil, being beside him. There were rumors around that such a cult practiced in a secret area outside of town. I was always hearing things like “they are over here,” or, “they are over there, in a cave.” But I never found them. I was using magic to find “them.” And I finally did on my 18th birthday. Only that they did not have the evil doings I thought they would. They were Satanists. There was Satan among them. But no evil cult that ate babies and eyeballs and did other unspeakable things with the full might and force of magic behind them.

        I hadn’t had any friends that were interested in these things growing up. I was the only one. I was in a small school however. There was a witch in a strange house that I would visit. And I had a friend or two maybe a little into it. Actually when I changed schools in Arizona (over New Mexico) there were people into magic. Things like the Necronomicon. But still there was no group for me or any personal relationship with those of my own kind. Now that I am as old as I am, that doesn’t matter to me anymore. I am no longer into groups. In my mid twenties I was a part of a few online Satanist and Wicca groups. That is what really changed. The internet makes it much easier. When I was a teenager I got my name into the magazine Metal Maniacs (for their pen pal section.) Though for some reason I did not get a single letter. I think I might have gotten just one letter out of a magazine that was published everywhere. Maybe my jealous girlfriend was taking them before I could get them. E-pals used to be a thing I was into. I used to be a very lonely guy that only talked to others online. This is my only form of talking to others online anymore: by writing a book. And I am entirely okay with not being talked back to, as well. I can understand how a person would want to have an e-pal though, in looking back.

        It’s up to you if you want real life friends or exclusively online friends. You could make your own website, that isn’t a difficult thing. You could even make an online Church or website for one. There is a page that answers all questions. There is a page that provides your ways and philosophy. There is a connect to others page. There might be things to buy. There may be membership costs and you get a card or something (which are also easy to have made.) You may even have a nice necklace for your members. In fact the higher you are in rank the cooler the thing you get. You could make a cult if you are an evil twisted person.

        Whatever place you have within these groups hopefully it will be a place where you feel you belong and there are people who are always interested in hearing the next thing you have to say. I don’t doubt that it will be and that you are, at least getting a small handful of close friends out of it. Just don’t let there be a monopoly over things. Online groups such as these have invalidated any “supreme” Church in the matter. So no monopoly can really be held anymore. What is the difference between one and another anymore? Who cares who was first. That does not necessarily mean that the first did it right and are the right ones for you to be a part of. If they are going to charge a hundred dollars or more for membership then they are not going to be around very long. If they survive that at all it is all just a fraud. They keep cheap websites up hoping to steal some money here and there from suckers. All in all and on the whole, do not let any Satanic religion hold a monopoly over your beliefs and non beliefs. That is the very definition of a cult.

        

The Attributes of Satan and Lucifer

Let me insert something here: when I named myself Lucifer it was always more of a Lucifer Jr. kind of thing. I didn’t name myself as Lucifer in the literal sense but used the name as a more “child of Lucifer” sort of thing. I say that taking names comes at a high cost. I was in a mental hospital one day when the staff told me to go to my room. I told them to say, “Say Lucifer to me, go to your room,” when he refused I spat on his face. He then hit me so hard that it hurled me backward. I got right back up. The nurse yelled out that I lost a pint of blood. She was trying to stitch up the area between my eyebrows (that third eye area.) Looking at it oddly, because it wasn’t a cut but a crack. It cracked that area of my skull. I went to my room after that. I spat up some strange slivers of things into a paper bowl. I then heard the voice in my head “Lucifer has spoken.” It’s just a story I wanted to include.

        There are attributes to Satan that Satanists do not consider so much. How about him being subtle? He gets the point across just fine, not too much, but enough, in making his point, in bringing the message across. Music was made for him and he is a truly masterful musician. He “sealith up the sum,” and is most perfect. He represents what is perfect. He is The Light Bringer. He masquerades around like an angel of light. That word masquerades is an important one. He goes about like a lion. He plants his things wherever they will go. The Devil’s way is more difficult to sustain. He desires worship. He is the inverse of God. He is in all of holy scripture, only reversed, and that is a Satanic key to the Bible. I had a vision once that after Noah’s ark (after he sent out a dove to see if there was land nearby) Satan ripped off a wing of a dove and said to God after that “just like that one wing dove.” It was not a thing so elaborately anti-scripture, but a powerful one.

        Then there are the attributes we all know. He is the most beautiful of angels. He represents individuality and freedom. He is the morning star. Venus. He fell from Heaven. The Earth is his. He is an angel.

The Existence of Gods

The human existence we are coming into. We are already unrecognizable from just a short time ago. Look at how far we have come! So what about the future? The future that might not even be too far from now? What will our homes be like? What would life be like? Let’s say that energy has become incredibly cheap and abundant, even limitless. No more lines at the gas station. No more problems having a vehicle take you where you want it to, as driverless technology comes about. So what would keep you from living in a nice RV and traveling the world? If food as well becomes as cheap as can be.. Food replicators, or whatever other thing needed has been made. If robots, drones, and 3D printers can make homes, as they themselves never tire and have limitless energy, high rising homes can be made, enough for all, enough to share. I like to think you will be able to go from city to city as much as you want to without fearing you don’t have enough money. If they do create a holodeck then the amazing effect of that is taking a limited space and making it limitless. So every home, maybe most or however much, will not technically be a small space even though it is, just enlarged by a holodeck room. We can be with people far away too just as realistically as can be, though not in actuality. Humans can get lonely but it usually doesn’t take much not to be: many are fine with just texting as it is. Things like augmented reality, in home cameras, and other things can create the representation of the loved ones they need.

        I hope and pray for universal basic income. A home for all, great crime deterrents, cures to illness, and longer happier lives. That is where the focus should start. Sooner or later there will be no reason to steal. A person would have all they could need. If they chose to steal then they simply could not get away with it. As cameras are smart enough to know exactly who they are. It is a pity that these AI cameras that could do that are being demonized as “invading privacy.”

        Someday the book of what humans have made will fill endless volumes. Every form of light you can think of will have been made. Older things will be perfected, such as solar panels. Robots will come in any form you can imagine. Software will write software, make movies, art, books, just about any kind of entertainment you want. CGI will come to perfect realism. Older software and video games will be easily held within incredibly small devices. Even those that take up a lot of space in modern times.

        Barriers will be broken. We will be able to be just the kind of person we want to be. We might take on more spiritual forms. Things might go from metal tech to spirit tech (energy forms for example.) When we conceptualize spaceships they are always made of metal. I believe that just as we surpassed wooden boats we will surpass metal space ships. They will come into strange energy based substances. If we could control android bodies through advanced VR then we could go to the moon without actually being there. Solid energy will be one of our greatest accomplishments.

        Solid energy means that walls can be made that are not made of solid material, not bound to the minerals we have currently. Solid energy could rapidly elevate us, as in a solid energy elevator that goes in all directions. Solid energy could make the four walls to a home and the roof and floor. It could protect us personally. It can be made to do what a wheel does. It can be made to do what a treadmill does.

        Stores will allow you to take and leave. That is a thing that is starting to come about. That the store knows who you are through your smart phone and automatically charges you for what you leave with. It might be a common site soon to see drones in the sky– those which deliver things. It might be common to see a robot device on the sidewalk delivering the mail. Maybe robot cars will be on the roads– not occupied by humans, having a kind of design that fits their uses the best. Maybe companies might send out those to park on the street and look for customers. McDonnald’s recently came out with an automated store. From start to finish, robots within them are serving up food and taking payment. They cook it and everything else. There are those that complain that this will take away people’s jobs. Well first, those jobs will go elsewhere (probably to better places) and second, it is just another one of those things that enables universal basic income (which most of all needs our resources to expand.) If a multitude of fast food places did this they would save a lot of money. Just by the nature of competition that will create cheaper prices.

        What will future jobs be like? I imagine they would be more personally chosen. If people do not have to work they don’t have to. If they do, they will have the pick of the litter. They will have greater tools to go along with it. Things like 3D printers, other printed material, sewing machines, notation software, word processors, digital art, traditional art, game making software, and so on. If what they want to do is make a new video game for a very old system they could. If they want to make what shirts they want, they can. They could make what coffee cup they want. They could also come up with all new things, things that haven’t been done before. They could work on research. They would be aided by the internet. And whatever education they want they will be able to get it online with no need of an actual teacher.

A Time To Retire, Soon

I foresee a better future. A future where all of a person’s needs are met, easily. Where we not only have the food we need but it is good food, and through science we can even stay thin like on a diet pill (someday.) Our time of retirement might be soon. A time when we will not have to worry about having a home. A time when we are sure to have one under any circumstance. A time where we can go about much more freely, even taking midnight walks if we are night people. A time when crime has been brought down to nothing, in the future to come.

        We are at the retirement age as a race of people. We were prisoners here for a very long time. Getting by was brutal. Getting out of that difficult place was a long time coming. Humankind has just about paid their debt. Taken from paradise, sent out to the field to bring it back, which we just about have.

        But God blessed us with seemingly limitless resources. I mean it is a great joke to consider how much water we have. But just like it is in God’s style, it was water we could not drink. People were always moving around trying to find drinkable water. Now more and more we can desalinate it and drink it. You have to wait awhile to make a tree grow back. Things like that kept us moving along. We could not sit around doing nothing. We had to keep moving. We were invested with an interest to learn. We were gifted the intellect to make things happen. We are truly above the animals of the earth. We are truly becoming better than what you would call the human race. We are entering into a god-state beyond “human.”

        It might still be a while off but I imagine soon enough we will have reached that retirement point and when it does, all past worries will be washed away and we will be able to live just the life that we want to.

The Joys of My Youth

I remember every time we drove by McDonnald’s I would wish we would stop there. As an adult though, that is just another building I passed by. I awaited my birthday and Christmas, something terrible. By the eve of them I simply could not sleep. It was a most wonderful day for me. I remember my first game console, the NES. We went to Pizza Hut often and they had a Super Mario Bros arcade game there. I never had enough quarters for those things as a kid. Dollars would be gone in minutes. So I very much welcomed having the system that I could play all day long. I had the Super Mario Bros and Duck Hunt (action) bundle. My next two games were Ninja Gaiden 2 and Mega Man 4. They were difficult games but fun. Ninja Gaiden 2 was very pattern based so the more patterns you master the further you get. Mega Man 4 had this incredible opening and elements to it and I still like it the most out of the Mega Man games. Every Friday my mother took me to rent a game and get some snacks. They weren’t always the best games. They had just a limited amount of games and I guess the better ones were usually taken. When Mario Bros 3 came out us NES gamers wanted to play and own that one above all the others. However it was only rented out in the more expensive video stores so for that reason I couldn’t rent it. I would get an NES and a large bundle of games as a 13 year old. I had an Atari 2600 at that time too.

        I had three games that immersed me in them more than any other. The top two of those were Final Fantasy 2 and Final Fantasy 3 for the American SNES. I would put The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past as a third. The music, the settings, the story, the gameplay, were a world of its own for me and honestly it is pointless to try to convey that to anyone unless they experienced themselves. I played Super Mario World so much that my thumbs got sores on them.

        I always had a birthday party at one place or another. The bowling alley, a fast food place, or the skating rink (“Roller World” in Clovis, NM) which I liked the most. I remember waiting in line for my skates. Then putting away my things in a little locker, and going out to skate for over an hour until my ankles got sores on them. They had a food place inside too and an arcade room inside. They had neat late 80s stuff on sale such as fanny packs and slap bracelets. It was an awesome time.

        I enjoyed overnight visits to certain relative’s homes just about more than anything else. I had a cousin I thought the world of. He lived in a neat area of its own a little apart from town. A kind of large land area with so much to “venture around.” My brother, me, and him played things like “war” together. One night though he told me a scary story that scared me to death. About a guy without a head and his partner that helped him get new heads. So he looked into the kids' windows looking for heads. Reminds me of another cousin saying that there was a murderer going around so “watch out for him.” Haha, that night I stayed in a room with a very large window too, one without a curtain. But it was that same day and night that another cousin of mine gave me some slime. 80s slime was the greatest, they don’t quite make it the same these days. Things like that were so astonishing for a kid. Music had an astonishing effect. So did movies and cartoons. They were a part of the mysteries of our youth. Like this little electronic keyboard that came and went when I was about 4 years old. This foot long white casio keyboard that when you pressed this, this happened, and when you pressed that, that happened. Eventually it would just disappear altogether and I remember being five years old looking for it.

        One birthday I got a really nice BMX bicycle. Another year I got a “cool cat” skateboard. There was an abandoned hospital near my home, just a couple of blocks away, that had ramps I could skateboard on. It was very much an 80s thing. I mean, people still skateboard but it was much more a thing of the time. Probably because of TMNT's popularity. With my bike I would sometimes get a flat and have to fix it with fix-a-flat but it worked well enough for me to get around a lot. I would go all over the neighborhood. I would find new gas stations I didn’t know anything about before. It was a really neat way of discovering things. I never knew what might be around the corner of one area or another. I would get cheap sour apple bubble gum at a little gas station. My favorite place to go though was a comic book store called “captain comics.” It was across from our old library (the new one in Clovis moved to another area.) It was a while to get to but when I got there I would pick up a few cheap old comics. They really were cheap, just 25 cents which even after inflation is cheap.

        One of my most favorite childhood gifts was a Nintendo GameBoy. It was so neat to have these mini gray NES looking carts to play anywhere. I had Tetris for a while then the next Christmas I got Kid Icarus, Metroid 2: Return of Samus, and Super Mario Land 2: Six Golden Coins. But what was really neat to me was being able to play Zelda portably with Link’s Awakening.

        My greatest fun must have been the amusement parks I went to. The water slides, the coasters, the quickly spinning things, the giant boat that goes upward to the left then swings high to the right, it was always a lot of fun. Wherever we went we went to a nice hotel. We went to ones with heated pools and enjoyed swimming. Sometimes we went to a cabin or a sort of such place in wooded areas. The environment was very special to me. To be around so many trees. The scent of the trees and environment was very stimulating. Me, my brothers, and my father would climb all sorts of mountains. We would often go fishing too. I really enjoyed the lakes and the rivers. They held just as much fascination as the mountains and forests did. Being up to my neck in mysterious water was exhilarating. The way my feet would go over large stones, being in such a place different from the ground, you could say, was what appealed to me. We went out on boats sometimes. The largest lake we went to was in Oklahoma, called Ten Killer Lake. One year early in my life (when I was 8) we went to a Church camp in Colorado. We climbed what was probably the tallest mountain we would: Pikes Peak.

        Everything was special to me. Watching The Wonderful World of Disney on basic TV was a wonderful experience. The cartoon movies I would watch had me far more involved than a movie ever could at my age. Early morning cartoons that came on every Saturday were something I looked forward to. It was always nice going to a store when my parents bought us toys of all kinds. All in all it was a special time in my life. The time when I was new to this world. The time when I did not know how circuit boards, TVs and games worked, or what those wonderful sounds were coming from a radio. I would have my pocket radio on all day and fully enjoyed it.

        

The Joys of My Teenage Years

I was thirteen when the Satanic really came about for me. That was mostly fueled by metal music, Satanic horror flicks like Warlock and Omen 4, metal magazines, books of Satanism and witchcraft, and things like Satanic jewelry. I had been approaching it before then. I had flirted around with the idea of black magic over white magic. I had been a Christian first. I became what you could call a Devil Worshiper in full at the age of 13. I would mostly lose interest in it by the time I became an adult, at age 18. Before then though it was a dark power within me. I felt “darkness” emotions. They were just as much emotions as any other, the kind everyone had, but that I alone carried as far as I know. My world was in shades of the diabolical and wicked. There’s not much I can do to explain it. My parents were bothered by the sorts of Satanic things pinned on the wall of my room. We went to Church. But one thing led to another which propelled me into it all. The main thing was that while I was in elementary school I had two friends discussing magic. Being surprised with what they said about it I decided to try it out myself. I found all sorts of books on it in the library. I wanted something more powerful however and by the age of 13 I went just into that direction, the direction of black magic and the Satanic. At the same time though there were other things in my life apart from it. Final Fantasy 2 (SNES) was one thing that took my focus from that and put it into the game. They say that Final Fantasy is satanic (these staunch church people) but ironically it sort of got me out of it. Later that was with Final Fantasy 6, more so. Mostly the things I liked the most were those two things and music videos. It was at that time that all we had were TV channels that showed any music videos. So I had a VCR always ready to record whatever would play. That way I could watch them again and again. On rare occasions a video they hardly ever played came on. The same went with the radio. I spent a lot of time listening to the radio in order to record a song on a cassette tape. It was very much a part of my identity.

        I also enjoyed writing. I would spend all of my allowance on paper and pens and by the time the week was done I needed more of it. There were pens that were special to me. While I was at the grocery store I would read video game magazines and heavy metal magazines. When I was 15 I got a VHS tape called “Death is Just The Beginning” of which there were different volumes. It was about the only way I could see things like death metal music videos. There was a little store in Clovis called “The Dragon’s Lair.” It sold heavy metal tapes, necklaces, VHS metal tapes, metal stickers, and black light posters. One of my favorite bands had nothing to do with the Satanic, which was Type O Negative. I got a black light poster and a Slayer poster, a King Diamond tape, and a Slayer necklace. That was a high quality necklace, heavy, with a large Slayer eagle and symbol on it.

        I had begun a time of greater freedom. I could go to a friend's home and stay there overnight. Sometimes I would lie about that and just go to a party, coming home “early” after staying up all night. I was the only one in the household that smoked. I would try to smoke out of my window and thought it was fine until I used the restroom and came back inside to be overwhelmed with the smell of it. I would also take a bit from my father’s bottle of whisky and dilute it a little. Eventually I would just take whole beers and pour them into a cup of tea. In High School we would all smoke in the parking lot. I went to two different High Schools. One in Marana Arizona and another in Texico New Mexico. I was certainly more around my own kind in Arizona. I had lots of friends, lots of girlfriends too. There were actually people there that liked Slayer over any gangster rap. I got caught smoking in the restroom. The one way I would get away with it was by doing it out in the open, hiding the cigarette within my hand, and waving my hand back and forth in a natural way.

        My girlfriend lived with me when I was a teenager. I was sixteen, she was seventeen. Both of our parents allowed it to happen. We lived in the same room together and would watch a lot of movies. We would skip a lot of school too. We went out into the desert sometimes to drink and party with our friends.


The Joys of My Adult Life

Starting at about age 19, one of the greatest years of my life, I was living in a shed next to my father’s home. I call my step father my father, to possibly clear up some confusion, but right here I am talking about my biological one. This was in a home in Albuquerque, New Mexico. My father got a Windows 95 PC and I was able to enjoy using a word processor for the first time. I had a video game for PC called “Betrayal at Krondor” which I enjoyed playing, as soon as I could get it to work, which took awhile. I didn’t even know what an exe file was back then or to click on it. I loved Mountain Dew soda at the time. You could say I was really addicted to it, that I needed it to be happy. I would walk quite a distance to get a two liter bottle to bring home. In my little shack I would watch music videos from a TV channel that let you do requests, at a price. People were always calling in. It was very neat. You would see the moment someone dialed in for a selection and all the videos available were good ones. Even some bubble gum pop like Aqua. I was really into bubblegum pop.

        I would also get religious books at the library and study them. I didn’t have a lot of money but I sure enjoyed spending it. I would go to the bookstore and perhaps get a Nietzsche book or something like that. I got into Dragon Ball Z too.

        In my early 20s I really enjoyed the time with my brother watching different shows and films and generally sharing interests. The biggest ones being Star Wars and Dragon Ball Z. A thing happened when I was turning 20. I was hit with Schizophrenia and sent to a mental hospital. I was placed on Social Security and given a home with rental help from “section 8.” I was placed on medication and would go to a mental health clinic. A part of that clinic was a thing called PSR: psycho-social rehabilitation. It was a place where other people got together, mostly with either Schizophrenia and Bi-Polar disorder. It was a place where we could socialize and enjoy group things. We went to movies, we even went out of town. We even went to Las Vegas which is a wonderful place, especially The Fremont Street Experience. Sometimes we would just go shopping with our own money together. Once a week we went out to eat. We paid for that ourselves too. I gained a lot of friends from the place. Some days we were just inside playing card or board games and I even learned how to play chess.

        Having my own place for the first time was great. I could make it what I wanted to. I was still at an age where I got lonely however. So going to my family's house for the weekend and going to that PSR program was something I enjoyed the most. So strange, I don’t get lonely in any way anymore. I don’t do things like talk to myself either. If someone takes all day to text me back, then I don’t care. My family would have a fire in the backyard during the weekend, and would drink and listen to music, talking. Sometimes we went to my uncle’s place where he had a pool table. I was still going on vacation with my family. We had a cabin out in the woods outside of Las Vegas New Mexico (there is a city in New Mexico that is also called Las Vegas. It is where the state hospital is in fact.) It was a nice cabin in a nice wooded and mountainous area. You might be surprised at how many forests and mountains are in New Mexico. There was a nice little pond nearby that we fished at. The cabin itself had satellite TV and nice furnishings. I was the only one to drink the water though. It was well water and my family brought jugs of store water. The problem was that I drank far more than they did and I didn’t want to take up the water they brought. Besides, I wasn’t apprehensive towards it being well water. We went to a mountainous area in New Mexico called Red River.

        For a time my greatest interest was writing music. That was especially so after getting my first notation software. After some time I went from music writing (something I learned and began at the age of 17) to writing books. The website Lulu was a big factor in that. To have my books printed and distributed held more interest for me than any notation software could. I began writing The Christian Satanic Bible to start. I would even come to get that book in the local library, cataloged by the staff. It was such a rudimentary version of it though. I would work on that book for six years before I felt it was finished. That was all that I would work on with writing although I was working on it all the time. It was becoming homeless that would start me up writing other books. I could not have written them without the things I would come to experience. After a time in jail and the state hospital for years I got into a group home. This was in 2017. I got into a group home and wanted badly to be writing. My money started back up and as soon as I could I got a smartphone. I saw a commercial on TV saying there was a Microsoft Word app for Android. That is how I wrote for a long time to come: on a smartphone. As a result the grammar was poor. I am sure that simple grammar fixing software will come about, just feed it into it, and there you go, so I am not concerned about it. I was in a group home and using a smartphone was just more practical. I am now in my own room most of the time. I have a 43 inch TV for a laptop monitor. I also switched to Google Docs.

        These days my life includes a number of great things. I have all those things I need the most in abundance. I have a great big TV. I have my own internet. I have my own room. My own coffee, my own tea, my own food and my own ways to cook my own food. I have learned through group home chores to be a clean person, and I am. I never leave dishes unwashed. I vacuum when I need to. I keep things orderly all the while. I take out my trash. I wash my clothes. I shower. Taking my rocky past it is a miracle that I have come into such a nice place as I have today and I hope and pray it stays that way.

The Hardest Things Of My Past

I had a father that would promise me all sorts of things only to let me down again and again. He crushed my hopes at times. He told me he would take me to the fleamarket to spend my birthday money (which I got from my real parents) but when the time came he was like what the hell was I talking about. What makes me believe he would do that?

        Without my medication I am an insane person. Through and through. You might not know this, but Schizophrenia medication doesn’t work by sedating you. It actually takes away delusional thinking and hallucinations associated with it. Without it you are a wandering madman full of the strangest ideas and thoughts you could ever imagine. You can have no functionality in life if you are like me and unmedicated. The only thing that ever saved me was I wound up in jail and was put back onto meds. It is unfortunate that it works out that way for most of us.

        There was a time when iced tea was like gold to me. Being homeless you either begged or ate from the garbage. I ate the garbage. Towards the end of it I just freely pulled stuff out of it and gobbled down. I would have to piss anywhere and I got used to doing that as well. You might see on the news sometimes some homeless guy taking it out and just going right there as though not bothered by it at all. It gets very cold being homeless, even when indoors it feels perfectly warm. I would roll up into a ball at night and eagerly await the sun. I practically worshiped the sun. People would come up to me to hand me a little money. I think twice I got $20. Most often it was a dollar bill. And believe me, I enjoyed the candy it got me, or the simple paper notebook. But I was short on lighters at times and had to ask around about one all the time. My tobacco addiction never let up. I spent a lot of time looking for pieces of it on the ground. The police didn’t want me around larger ashtrays, touristy areas. I would roll it with whatever: trash paper, even newspaper.

        It was a profoundly magical experience. One of voices and one of a reality that most will never get the smallest inclination of. Without knowing how delusions make you feel I won’t waste my time explaining just how different the world is, how different those around “are” and so on– but believe me, I’ve come to call it hell.

        Mental hospitals have been a bad part of my life at times. Being in jail too. I would rather be homeless, starving, and crazy than to be there.

        Other than those things my life has been fine. I had some natural upsets from time to time. I had more difficult times than others. I had bad company at times- a-holes. But I have come from the worst, always shining. I have never experienced depression in my life and cannot even grasp what it feels like. I have never harmed anyone in life. I have never done nor would I ever do something that would put me in prison. If I lost it all again I could probably get it all back. I get along with my family to this day. I haven’t gotten myself into bad groups. To this day I have not done drugs. I think I did pretty well for myself.

My Tastes in Entertainment

Morgan was a recent movie I enjoyed. Not to be confused with Megan. It was about a genetically engineered little girl. She really enjoyed going out into the woods. They took her outside privileges away for no good reason and she attacked a staff person. So they had to confine her. Now a governmental person is coming to check up on their “project” to see if she is going to either be accepted or be terminated. That is the beginning of the plot.

        Blade Runner is something I am really into. I like the second one even better than the first. For most movies though it takes a lot to keep me interested for two hours. Thankfully on YouTube I can just do it in clips. I am more of a clip person most of the time. I did buy the movie called “Pearl” though which is about a psychopathic girl.

        My favorite villains are: Harely Quinn, Aku, Vegeta, Lestat, Luv from Blade Runner 2049, Palpatine and Darth Vader, Skeletor, Lisa from Girl Interrupted, Davros and his Daleks, Firefly from 3 From Hell, Faora-Ul from Man of Steel, Blix from Legend, Morgan from Morgan, Morgan from Merlin, Smaug from The Hobbit, Lyekka, Matrid and Prince from LEXX, Warlock from Warlock, The Shredder and Krang, those most of all.

        I like to watch news on YouTube too. It gives me a sense on how far the Apocalypse is coming along (if it is indeed occurring.) The end of the world is a nice place to start. Hopefully I am part of the rapture. I was praying about that last night. Hopefully my writing hasn’t damned me. I am just into shocking news, call me bad.

        What I enjoy the most however is things based on retro gaming. From what I hear it is something that takes up a large part of YouTube. There are all sorts of such videos. There are top tens, historical stuff, “best graphics,” “evolution of” videos, speed runs, competitions, casual playthroughs, reviews, even videos that are nothing but displaying old video game magazines for you. I have learned and enjoyed a lot along the way and have written books of all new video game ideas under my name Adam Jeremy Capps.

        For whatever reason I am just simply not into music any more. Maybe it is because I have heard everything I could enjoy again, again, and again. There was a time when I had to wait and hope to hear an old favorite song. I only had music channels on cable TV and the radio to hear them. Now that I have it all, exactly what I want, when I want it, I believe I am spoiled. Maybe it has to do with my age too. Back then my music was my identity. That is something that isn’t so any more. I don’t have music to swoon over or to make me one kind of guy or the next.

        I don’t play video games anymore. The last three I beat were Zelda: Breath of the Wild, A Link Between Worlds, and Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night. They were fun. They felt like chores though. I am just not so mesmerized by the stuff like I used to be.

        Is writing a form of entertainment? Well at least it is when it comes to my notebook books. They are books that I have hand written. I use color pens, stencils, stickers, and a spirograph set when I make them.

        

Everyone Is Becoming Individualists

Where it is that all music is available on demand, and movies, books, and other things too. When there is such a large amount of any given thing. When it is that there is no being “one” with it. When a person’s tastes can run free, individualism will come about. It is also caused by people being able to get exactly what they want. There was a pre internet time when the clothes one got were all basically at the same stores. They got them from whatever places there were in town. They could have been large stores. Still, things were narrowed down to what was available by things like gender, size, and personal preferences. Things are becoming more androgynous as well. The result of people being able to be more specific is individualism. It is also caused by broadness though. There was a time when the music people listened to was either on expensive CDs which carried only 10 songs, the radio, or the TV (which might have had only two music channels to them.) Likewise we only had the bookstore or the library to get our books. Now any book you can imagine is out there online to get. More choices makes more personal taste. Like with video games: there was a time when we may have had a handful of new games each year. Now we have all of the past games and the games to come. We have them on smartphones and new consoles. We also have them for clone systems, re-released systems, roms, and emulators. So a person’s tastes are no longer confined. They are given a lot more area to roam. And the result of things like these is greater individualism. Pickiness is a good thing to people, adding to the effect. People want something more suitable to them. They want more choices and will take advantage of that.

Who Needs School?

We have devices that can do the most complex math. We have software to fix grammar. We have AI to create and draw. We have teachers everywhere you can think about online teaching in the style you want. We are getting driverless cars and when that happens we won’t even need to pass a driving test. If it is so easy to cheat then maybe we don’t need the knowledge to begin with. We have all that we need to make tech do it. Besides, schooling requires a great deal of money. Imagine that money going towards scientific and technological advancement to fill any hole. School is better off teaching students how to use these things, things like 3D printing or whatever else. Whatever hobby the student chooses: writing, composing, making games, game competition sports, there’s a lot to choose from. They should be taught how to use the technology in a broad number of ways. Honestly though, even that is something they could do on their own. In fact they might become better at it if they did it on their own.

Know Your Choices

We have a great deal of them. I’ve considered just about everything myself over the years. What happened to stick with me was writing. I do find other things appealing though such as console modding and 3D printing. If you are into video games then you might use a game making software or even learn to code. Software is coming out that programs games for you! If making a little console is your thing then there are mini computers you can use. There are 3D printed controllers. New cases for old systems. Modern ports for old consoles. You can back light an old portable system that didn’t have one. You can fix the old devices such as using the cap set for a game gear (game gears have a notorious problem with cap leakage.) The NES often needs a new 12 pin connector given how the games are inserted. New optical drives can be put into old Playstations. Ideas for new games are important too. Game making isn’t only about programming. It is also about coming up with ideas to begin with. I’ve in fact written some books containing nothing but new ideas for games or new ideas to put into them. You can go the floppy route or the cart route, the CD route if you want, or just some electronic file for your game.

        With music there are all sorts of different softwares. Some are notation software. You choose your instruments and write down the notes in a traditional way, only in a way that the computer plays it back and records it for you, as in MP3 form. Then there is the riff softwares. You basically combine snippets of music. There is software for music making that does things like add an echo, distort the music, reverse it, and so on. If you want to cheat you can just take a pre existing thing of music and warp it so much that no one would know.

        If book making is your thing then a word processor is a place to start. You could write on your phone if it is more convenient for you. What’s neat about writing is that you can do it anywhere. It doesn’t make a lot of noise. No noise. And I mean it isn’t like taking out a canvas at a coffee store and painting there. Whatever you are using to write with it doesn’t take a lot of computational power, not by today’s standards. Any cheap laptop will do so as long as it is durable to begin with (won’t break/ isn’t cheaply made.) Set out to make a certain amount of pages. I would say 100 pages or more makes a book. Set out to write a certain amount a day. Most people find that 10 pages a day is about doing as good as you can. You can either stop by a certain time of your choosing or stop after you have created a certain amount of pages. Then there is publishing. You can either submit your books to good publishing companies or just place them on certain websites. I am a free ebook and public domain kind of author, but that’s just me. Making the cover, sometimes you might have to convert your file (some of the sites I upload to require a doc file and I don’t mean docx.) Some sites may want a higher resolution cover from you. Some sites will totally try to rip you off and waste your time. The moment you hit “publish” it says “first pay (   ) amount.” Or it sets things up for you that you find unacceptable. You could look for hours trying to find good places to publish to. Here is my list of the sites I use: Lulu, Google Play, Smashwords, archive.org, Xinxxi, Scribd, Free-Ebooks.net, Magcloud, and Payhip. Some of them are better than others. At the moment they are all free, good, and reliable.

        You can be a YouTube star. It isn’t easy. There is a lot of competition for it. But it could be fun coming up with your style, what kinds of things you would do best at, and to try, as it isn’t difficult to try. Put up some good videos and see how they do.

        Some people buy things from a thrift store, something like Good Will, and resell what they find. They either resell it online, at a flea market, a rented area, or an area they own.         

        Some people just make stickers or other simply shipped items and find an easy way to do things like ebay. If all it takes is simple regular postage then that makes things much easier. They have got to get these things from some place or another and not many adult gamers have their NES game collection anymore. So the art of it is finding it at the right price and maybe keeping it long enough to raise its value. You could make your own products altogether. That could range from a keychain to a leather wallet. I tried leather work at one time. You basically go to a store that sells leather upholstery and buy certain tools for it: like hole punchers and stamps. Could have been a lucrative thing for me.

        Maybe you are into carpentry or wood working. Maybe you are into forging and turning scrap metal into bars. Maybe you go places to hunt for gems. Maybe you have a nice metal detector. Maybe your money comes from the sea. Maybe you have the equipment that others do not, and so you have an advantage over them. Maybe there is a new store you can make, placed in just the right spot. Maybe you just want to be a bartender. Maybe you can take advantage of the newest technology, to get into the game early. You might put up vending machines or make a laundry mat. You might become a great inventor with enough thought. So what’s good for you? What is your heart into and what has simply stuck with you the longest? What are your goals for it? Money? Fame? Prestige? Or just to have a fun job that you are good at?

Perfectionism

There are people that spent a lifetime perfecting their talent. They were perhaps taught them by their parents, who did the same thing. They create the greatest products that you can find: the hand made, the meticulously made, a product that stands out as the most highly valued among its kind. Perfection isn’t possible, they say. It is elusive. It isn’t about being literally perfect however, it is about trying, the effort, to get there. It means that things will get better and better until even the smallest detail is without any flaws.

        “Anything worth doing is worth doing well.” If we rush something we get a travesty like ET on the Atari 2600. The game that almost single handedly broke the video game market. People were looking forward to that game on Christmas. When it appeared it let a lot of people down. When Nintendo entered into the market they had to pull off a few tricks to get anywhere. To bring the market back to life they put forth quality control. Every game making company making games for their system was limited in the amount they could make in a year’s time. So they had to spend more time on making them.

        There are those companies that make cheaper products, the short-cutters, and they have their place. They don’t however have the prestige and name-worth that the better brands have, however. There’s no real honor for a copycat thing. Everyone knows it is just a pretender. One becomes better and better and the other stays in the past. They are what I call “bottom feeders.” It is like when Nintendo made the D pad and that was copied right away. Then they made the thumbstick and that was too. What is the point of patents if they can be so easily broken? The slightest modification can make it be allowed.

        I do believe in patents. I even believe in medication producing companies getting large sums for the pills that they create as long as they are putting that money into research. It is a good system. It means that ideas are worth something, worth a lot. As a result people are making the world better through science and technology.

        There is a person of cheap talent and another with carefully honed talent. One that would do things in the quickest means. Another that develops things s/he can do through determination and practice. One is patient and the other is impatient. There is a level of being between the two. There is a great divide between the two in fact. One has a great deal to compete with: all the others that want things easily done. The other stands out as the one that is worth it. That is worth both the time and money. For every hundred of the cheap makers one gets paid. For every one among them that isn’t cheap, they get the rest.

Residing On The Great Mountain

There is a lower class, a middle class, and an upper class. There are those that have gotten far and high in life. They live in the tall buildings of the best making. The spiritual religions have always stripped a person down. The Satanic religion is about becoming greater. It isn’t our goal to deny ourselves. It is to elevate ourselves. Few find the place we would have. A wealthy sort of place, one of luxury. One with diamond and gold rings around our fingers. Where we eat the best food. Where we collect the most valuable of things. Where servants are all around and we live in a home the size of four smaller homes. A place with a heated pool. A movie theater complete with leather couches and a recliner. Where we could sip on a great wine while in a jacuzzi. A goat goes to where the mountains are and it is a good place for them.

The Best Therapy And Being Strong

Strength is a lost virtue. With how people act out it is no wonder why they just burst at the seams. They believe in these ridiculous standards that they just cannot receive or provide. These dumb kinds of standards that really don’t amount to anything but unnecessary social work around others. People around them are always breaking “those rules.” Politeness standards are just too unreasonable. No one wants to come across as aggressive or passive aggressive. They won’t even use the word “you” because it is like an accusation, they think, and the word “the” is on the table now for the same removal.

        People aren’t expected to get by on their own. They receive every little help for every little thing instead of being expected to make due. People are more capable than that. Further in the past people would break their backs to get by, but they did. While we don’t want things as difficult as that, there is testimony from such people that we are just not hearing.

        To me a good movie is good therapy. It distracts me for a while. I consider it to be almost like a dream effect. We are lost in ideas and fantasy and things for a while. We slip out of reality for a while. We believe things that are not true yet for a moment we fully believe they are. Movies are like dreams. The same can be said of all our entertainment really: books and video games, too. If there is any mystery in dreams keeping us together it applies to more than just sleep-dreams.

        We were built to be occupied and always changing. Humans are very task making. It is in our design to not be stagnant. We were meant to be a race that evolves. We were given a lot in our hands you could say. The really depressed are in bed all day and do not know why. The more mentally well off may not like to shower, but do. The depressed will not go anywhere because they know they stink. After a shower a person can have a moment of happiness and satisfaction from it. A depressed person hoards. They create a whole mess around their place and must live in it. A more well off person doesn’t allow that to happen, they clean regularly. So what I have to say is that keeping yourself busy and doing the important things go a long way in keeping you happy. You either microwave every little thing you eat or you cook good meals sometimes. You either wear the clothes of yesterday, change into clothes that need cleaning, or you put on fresh clothes every time.

        Having gratitude can make you happy. It makes you feel satisfied. It brings you appreciation for your things. It gives them worth that if you don’t have you don’t have. They are otherwise just things you have. It is good to meditate at least a little a day at how good life is and the things in it. Bright sided thinking, optimism, and positive thinking goes a long way too. You might even “pace” about a while thinking in such a way. It will replace any bad thoughts with good thoughts. It will wash away and make you “bright minded,” and think proud thoughts as well. Give yourself the right to be proud, even very proud, in your thoughts.

Reaching That Optimal Point

I wandered around for over a decade, my whole adult life, looking for the perfect place to live and not being content until I did. So I moved and I moved. I have lived in every kind of living environment you can think of. It led me to the edge of the ocean itself in San Francisco. I am happy with where life brought me. If you aren’t going up you aren’t going anywhere. You might start with a poor job but if it isn’t getting you anywhere then it is a good choice to find a better job. Maybe you have gotten a good education in finding that optimal point. It is such a sure way of getting a better job and better money in your life.

        If even our step up is small, we should take it. We should be looking for it too. If we have things to hammer out, then we should. If things are not as precisely well as we want them, we should address that. A person looking for a spouse should be certain of their choice, having found “the right one,” in all sureness. If a job isn’t getting us anywhere and we come to know that there is a better job for us, then let us go right to it.

        Let’s work to make our lives better on a daily basis. Let’s work towards our future in the best way we can. Whatever good new addition we can bring to our lives, let us look for them and take them. It can be something incorporated into a routine or something that just makes it all easier for ourselves. The more joyful things we add to our lives the better. Let us design our rooms just the way we want them. Let's make them good and pleasant places to be. If there is anything worth upgrading within our walls then we should. We should have our rooms evolve, at least a little. It is where we spend most of our time. If bought cheaply at the start, look for a superior thing to replace it. So let us upgrade our possessions and our lives itself.

Fun With Obscurity

Unless it is a thing that falls under the umbrella as “rare,” less common/obscure things can come cheap. What got me into classical music was the fact that classical CDs were so much cheaper. I thought, might as well try it out, and it turned out I liked it. Given my small allowance they were perfect for me. Some collect a certain series of books and look for things like first additions. I however went into the library to look for the best book based on publisher, genre, and year– a year of a whole decade. First, I already knew what the genre would be: fantasy/ science fiction. The other two I would have to determine by looking through all the books in that section of the library. I came up with the publisher Del Rey and eventually came up with the decade of the 1980s. I then had a type of book to collect: just those. Going to a used book store I found them as cheap as any other used book. One of my most favorite series among them was “The Heechee Rendezvous,” which I believe would be most perfect for a film. With all I know I don’t think the series has ever been put into film.

        It is why places like flea markets appeal to people so much. You never know what might be there. It is a graveyard of goods. I guess you could say that online stores have the same effect though people usually go in knowing what they want and knowing it will be there. In a flea market however you do not know what all might be there. When I make a budget I include an “anything” amount. A certain amount of money to spend at that store without knowing what it will be. One time that got me a unicorn snow globe. I passed by it knowing I definitely wanted it but not until then. We also purvey other people’s collections with that interest. It is a here-is-what-I-found sort of thing.

        A lot of good inspiration can come from the obscure. The more obscure they are the more they are bound to be unique when reformed and gathered together. The people of the best inspiration have not abandoned the past. They know it and have it for their use. That could be from myths not commonly known. It can be really old music. It can be of any long forgotten thing.

        Good knowledge is missed by people who only learn from the new. There have been all kinds of books and things that teach really good things which are no longer read by anyone.

A Little Apologetics

The question often comes up “where is God and why does he allow human suffering?” The answer to that is that we have refused to have Him in our lives and have in fact been both dismissed and ridiculed in every little way. God isn’t around because we don’t want Him around. We are very contrary to His wisdom, too. Only God’s wisdom is true wisdom. Without it we lean on our own vices: like selfishness, hedonism, and wickedness. We don’t have the things of God that we need. Where was God? God sent His only son to die on the cross for our sins. Humans were made to have free will and we misused it. It isn’t at all like He didn’t do anything about it.

        Jesus was no ordinary man. That should be plain as day. No ordinary man could have changed the course of the world. No words from an ordinary man could have lasted ages and ages and cherished by so many. The subject of countless books and never ending study, no ordinary man could have done and said things like that. It spread out like wildfire the moment it came about.

        The universe came with a big bang, with no creative power behind it? That insults my intelligence on so many levels. To see the beauty and masterfully formed degree of life.. The sun being the same size as the moon (by perspective) and the complexity of it all will lead reasonable people to see it as being God-created. To think of the great unlikelihood that you would exist at all, otherwise, is unfathomable. The Holy Bible itself talks of a people (God’s people, the Israelites) led in and out of harm a number of times yet able to pull themselves back together again and again.

How To Be A Good Christian

There are some bad Christians. They can be the worst of people in fact, even though they insist they are right in every little way. They would impose their goodness on others. They are quick to judge. That is what is in it for them: the sort of God’s wrath sort of people. They stand on the corner of the street preaching against trivial sins in order to cause guilt and get money out of people. Whenever they do that and have a tip jar, you can be sure.

I think that Paul made it hard to be a good Christian. That is where so many objections to Christianity come from. He considered himself the top of the roost. He had some of the better scripture within the Christian gospel but on the other hand he said do well to your captors (who enslaved you) general sexism and some homophobia. Maybe there should be a “Non-Paulite” denomination to Christianity.

Being a real Christian isn’t easy nor was it meant to be. It means forgiving people for the worst of things. It means to give freely “without expecting anything in return,” to turn the other cheek. But when the crap hits the fan they (sometimes) fail to follow that part of the bible. I have known those that would just leave those parts out altogether. As though it goes against reasoning and it isn’t important. I had a friend that once asked me “God gave you a pecker didn’t He?” Jesus never talked about sex, and I am the same way: I do not sexualize things nor do I like them to be.

Some Christians go way too far down the self sacrificial route. They create strict cults in the most sincere of ways. They lead their followers to wage war and slay themselves. It is a dangerous religion when delved into the wrong way.

It does have its wisdom though. It can keep you out of trouble. It can keep you doing right. It can have a Santa Claus effect (knows if you were good or bad.) As for me I struggled to keep it all together and in the end only Satanism mixed into it could make that happen for me. But as Jesus said “wisdom is justified of her children,” or, if what you do produces good results the way you came about it doesn’t matter. Satanists have a little harder phrase they use: “let the ends justify the means.” I am more of a “no harm done” sort of person.

When Sin Is Perfectly Okay

I am a very honest person. I am full of truth. I am even accurate with what I say, not embellishing things. I don’t like the idea of putting a falsehood into someone’s head. I don’t want to be known as someone I am not. That sort of thing in fact scares me. I believe though that if anyone were to use the truth against me then I should lie. It is like an interrogation thing. “You did this by accident, didn’t you?” They lie to get the truth. They pose themselves to be after your best interests but in reality they are trying to get you locked away as long as possible.

        I think that a little gambling is a good thing. Such as getting maybe a couple of scratchers each week. That can be fun. Not at all costly. Your odds are lower that way. But after a few years of buying them your odds will just go up and up. If you never overspent to begin with then it is like an investment.

        A little drinking can soothe you. I don’t get soothing feelings out of it myself though there are some that could really use it. If it reduces stress at all and you don’t over do it, it can only help. I approve of Marijuana. I don’t find fault in smoking it.

        Eating healthy at all times only ruins food for you and keeps you from what should be a wonderful human experience. Some pop music is fine and fun sometimes but sooner or later you are going to need something a little harder, not that you would act on what they sing about. It is okay to watch horror movies. It doesn’t mean you aspire to be a murderer.

        Cussing is fine among people that cuss. If your friend doesn’t like it, then just don’t do it around him or her. But if your other friend does cuss, then cuss along with them.

        Sometimes getting into fights is the only way. It can be quite a disciplinary lesson for them. So then they will think twice about the bully kind of lifestyle. The only way to undo a bully is to fight them. If they harm someone you love then you should certainly fight them. Among the worst kinds of people are those that burglarize and rob. I always support the person that would defend themselves against such people, even with a gun. I have no tears for criminals. These people would throw away life like it is meaningless garbage and think that hard earned things should be theirs instead.

        I don’t find any fault in greed and pride. I approve of capitalism. The truth is that capitalism serves the people. It is about people getting rich but they are getting rich through the people. That comes from free enterprise and competition. So they have the best product, things that people want and need, at the best prices. Capitalism serves the people in such a way and gives everyone the opportunity to succeed.

        On the other hand I don’t believe in the “vent it out” stuff. You know, those people who say that if you don’t vent out emotions they will boil over/ erupt. As long as I believed that, which I used to, I had anger issues. It was teaching me to be angry. It did not allow for perspectives to see things in a better light, to maintain hope and ignore small matters. I just don’t like anger. It is the emotional form of pain. So I won’t let it ruin my day and put me into misery. The kind of thing that urges you to act against someone who did you wrong.. The more you think about things like revenge and retribution the more you are likely to boil over. Then there is the sexual matter of things that goes along the same lines. That “sexual repression is mentally harmful.” It isn’t. It keeps you from things like bad porn habits and perverted thinking.

Be With Your Own Group, Have Your Own Opinions

The bad thing about openly sharing your opinions is that you are putting them up for inspection. That happens whether or not you were wanting them to be. A person that keeps those things to themself will guard them and own them more fully. We live in a very cult-like society. They have their own cult terms, ideas, concepts, methodology, and enforcement. They think that those things should pour into everything else, even into a person’s personal religion and church. There is no place for people to hide, it seems.

        A strong dividing line should be drawn between them and you, and you and your group/ church. They have no place in telling you how to think and act. They should not be allowed to obstruct us or misform us to suit their own mentality. They are ever active in doing it though. The early Christians had to go into hiding. It has become that way again.

Social Sludge

Socializing can be likened to a swamp. There are evil creatures within it. There are monsters, like monsters wanting everything you own. The greedy kind, primed to commit criminal acts to get it. There is the bully bunch. They must make others weakened to prop themselves up. They are like weeds that choke out flowers. They live off of slime. Like alcohol, drugs, and poor people’s food. They are always sinking down and will never find a way up for as long as they are with each other. It is a rotten place to be. The only way you can grow there is to grow up bad. Everyone there feeds off of each other’s rot. There is not a beautiful thing to be found. If ever a beautiful thing entered there it would soon start to look like the rest of it. It will quickly decay. People in that swamp do not live long. They are digested for the next thing to come. The only reason why it survives is because there is alway a new person to come along to continue the feeding cycle. It is a sort of place that a person can accidentally come across. That person will either see what it is or, from curiosity, choose to discover what it is about. There are those that make lying signs pointing people in its direction. They are people such as those that would use you and drain you, that would rob you, and leave you there to rot with everyone else. They know better than to be a part of the swamp. But for their own benefit they drag people there. They can be quite cunning at their job too. A little gotten away with here and there and experimentation with drugs leads to a lifelong addiction. I had a neighbor that was a nightmare. She pounded on walls, even mine. Was always yelling at the top of her lungs. Was throwing things at my door. It could go on for hours. Me and the other neighbors were always putting in complaints about her. Then one day I heard the staff asking her if she knew what the eviction process was like. Not another month passed before I heard some drilling or something on her door. I didn’t know what that was. It turned out they were putting new locks on her door. After that they placed a no trespassing sign and “eviction” sign on her door. She returned home and ripped the sign off, and that was the last time I saw her. I prayed for a quiet neighbor to take her place in that room and I sure got one, (my thanks to God.)Like he never exists. Two of my other neighbors were always fighting over the one’s noise. He busted down his door in agitation and also got evicted. The one making noise is still here but that’s fine. That’s fine because I have two white noise machines that completely block out his sounds. Actually only one is even needed for that but on rare occasions there is someone below me with loud music. I recommend white noise machines. Mine has a “fan” sound setting that I like. Anyways, this current neighbor of mine, that same guy, told me yesterday that he liked that I was private. That some here act like this building is a party but it’s not, it’s a home, and just like me he liked privacy. He said he didn’t like me for being “good” and he didn’t like me for what I did , but what I didn't do (talk to him and bother him.) He apologized for getting carried away with noise but I told him he doesn’t bother me any, and he appreciated that. I went through hell and back with bad neighbors, believe me.

The Disorderly

The word “disorderly” is a powerful one. It is defined as: involving or contributing to a breakdown of peaceful and law-abiding behavior. It is also defined as: lacking organization; untidy. A smart person sets up their life in the best way they can, and has the important things under control. They do not let others or other things take away their proper management of it. They don’t get lost in the flows and throes of crazy/ chaotic people. The lives of some manifest chaotically. The lives of another kind go according to their design. The chaotic kind do not know where they will sleep next even when they have their own homes. The chaotic kind are often fueled by drugs and alcohol, might be high or drunk all the time. Their focus is the next buck however they will get it, even if it comes through theft. Foreign places are not unfamiliar to them. They end up in places they haven’t been in before through a broad but loose connection of friends. Those that manage their lives know to keep strangers out of it. They don’t want things like party living. Their spouse suits them fine, if they have one, and they want to keep bad influences out and want to keep out any one who would intrude on their lives.

        I once heard from a person “people are going back to their tribal ways.” He didn’t know what he was talking about. He was talking about going back to arrowheads and producing cheap bead things to sell from an inability to work. He was talking about lazy people, an incompetent people, with progress halted. He took it as a glorious be-free thing. Where people did not have to work on their lives. Where the greater social structures all came tumbling down to be replaced with tent living and general lawlessness. He truly didn’t know what he was talking about.

        It takes a lot of work from good people to keep things together. There are those that keep it together and those that ruin, demolish, and put things to waste. The good people are always having to fix things for them.

Let Authority Be Strong

I have witnessed on a number of occasions that people rip on the police and only turn a minor problem to a large one. Police are people too and can get just as offended by a person that lashes out on them and desires to ridicule them. Political leaders are being harmed by people who are sure that their authority is evil and should not be, when that isn’t so. The best thing to do with the police is to just agree and be generic. Being generic means not embellishing things and not being overloaded with things to say. When the police system cannot function, the MPs (Military Police) might come in and believe me, if you thought regular police were bad.. My word for them are conks. They’ll conk you in the head. Anarchy can never be. It can never continue, that is. People need to be protected by people powerful and able enough to do so. Even if not for themselves, certainly for their loved ones. Little gangs and things might do a mediocre job at that at best. Good people do not want a crime climate where rape and murder is all around. What I have to say is that “let philanthropy win.”

Let the Good Thrive and Persevere

If a person is truthful and even has the will to confess the worst things, then that should not go unrewarded. If they are full of lies and excuses though, then not so. Most are full of excuses. They will lie up and down and left and right to get out of trouble. Their lives depend on a lie in some cases. But if a person is forthright with the truth then that is an honorable thing.

        If you ask me, forgiving is the way to go. For whatever reason, for keeping things together, anger under control, to not live in spite and hate are good enough reasons. Bad things might happen, things you cannot do anything about. May God correct things for you and may Karma fall against them, without us at all being God’s-wrath-upon-you people. If you see a person that needs to be helped out, defended a little, then do so. If you see a good person being mistreated then do not let it be. If there is a good person among a hundred bad people, help him or her out. Give them some encouraging words at least.

        I had a friend that would give every dollar he had. He had a job and we did not. He would be handing out large bills on his pay day and everyone was eager to take it from him. They would try to convince him to give them the largest amount. “You are my best friend here, you know that,” it is those kind of rotten people, such selfishness, that gets to me the most. The kind that take advantage of the disadvantaged. A sad thing is.. Is that he was almost scammed on his phone. He got one of those “you won the lottery” messages where “if you pay us a deposit it is all yours.” He was sitting there so happy that he was finally going to be rich himself with so much more to give and show for it. I had to tell the truth to him and his father too. God bless his heart.

        I think that a person who went through life without being jailed, especially if they have a job and family, should be treated very well legally if they get caught up in something like a misdemeanor. That can happen at any time. Just a little slip up in life puts you in the wrong place at the wrong time– people like that deserve some consideration. My favorite singer, who has passed away, Peter Stelle of Type O Negative, had to deal with a man touching and flirting with his girlfriend. He attacked the guy and was put into jail and a mental hospital for it. People can be really bullied. When they fight back, usually they are the kind of people that have to fight back, then they deserve some consideration for it all. These are the kinds of people who end up committing suicide. That is because they are gentle natured and not able to fully defend themselves. I once saw an asian lady on the corner of the street that looked like she was hysterical and she was probably forced into drugs and prostitution. The more and the harder such crimes are fought against the better. There is evil in the world that should be burned out with a great and fiery flame.

        A person who is productive should be given more consideration. If they have had their job for some time and are trying to support themselves and their family with hard work then that should certainly look good on them.

        As far as really bad people go I believe that they should be deprived until their doings can no longer lead to any harm being done. Where they are incapacitated. Where they are castrated for rape. As for people who are doing well in life, who treat others with kindness and respect, they should be given the most. They should have the greater liberties and the greatest power over the rest, the others.

        

Let the Bad Be Punished

That is something we need in America at this time. It is something in dire need. People are going into stores, taking as much as they can carry, and walking out with it without paying. People are tying ropes onto ATM machines and carrying them off with them. Drug use is rampant. Where I live I see it being done on sidewalks as I pass by on the bus. People are going on rages and fits in fast food places, destroying everything inside, and the same in gas stations. People are brazenly robbing and carjacking. They are raiding the White House and attacking politicians as though on cause. There are arsonists all about and you name it: it is being done. We need tougher laws. I am not talking about torture level laws (then again a murdering rapist might qualify) but laws people will fear. Laws without much mercy. Laws that put the fear of God into people.

Finding Your Style

Kids are always coming up with hero and villain identities. TV has grown such imagination more than anything else could have. Whether it is Batman or from some cartoon there are a lot of characters a person can emulate. As adults we are not about to put on a batsuit and pretend to be a hero while out and about in town. When I was a kid I actually wanted to go into the sewer through the manhole. I also had an over-eye-only face mask. I was into such TMNT things thinking that there was a whole hidden life possible below. Spider man web toys are for kids though. Some of us are more subtle about it as adults, maybe only coloring our hair. If we are a little braver we shave it and put on a punk wig. There are piercings. Eyebrows, ears, or whatever. Some adults like being bikers, so they get a Harley and a leather jacket. They might even join a biker gang. Some are Devil Worshippers whatever that means for them. There is a goth way of dressing. Some emulate gangsters in gangster movies and so on.

        I came up with a list of twelve names. I call it “my list of twelve names.” It contains the characters I like the most. It is a list ready to be put to use, to apply. As adults we are the ones more likely to make the stories, and why not? We can have others become them for us. Whether we have a good new vampire idea or a great science fiction thing to put forth, we are only limited by our talent to make them. Good ideas are a good gathering of old ideas. Things are done your own way by your own mixes as determined by your influences. Star Wars had the death star. That was a spherical thing. It probably influenced the BORG ship in Star Trek. That probably influenced the large pyramidal shape in LEXX made up of “Mantrid drones.” They saw an old idea and wanted to do something similar, only in their own way. It is all just a large pot of stew that people make when all of their ideas are brought together. Every pot is its own unique thing unless they are outright just copying old ideas. “There is nothing new under the sun.”

A Real Life Makeover

Always be looking for an epiphany. Always be looking for a new and better life. Always work towards your future. Always be looking for your most mighty purpose in life. Always be willing to change things for the better.

        A new set of clothing is always a good place to start. Look over the mountain onto the city and seek to capture it. Seek to capture the world itself.

        Go in the way of a better job. Make the first day of a good education become a reality. That reality can be or not be. It is amazing how simple choices can entirely change things for us. They can in fact mean the difference between a mediocre life and a meaningful one.

        Take what opportunity you can. Take advantage of things while you can. Be the first to arrive and be followed ever after.

        There are things other than personal success that can change your life as well. It might be going to a new city and starting a new life. It might be the choice to regularly go to a place you like, or find such a place. It could be inviting any good thing into your life. It could be correcting wrong. It can be in all life improvement that you can muster.

        The point is that a new day may come for you or not. The first step matters the most. I have always found it helpful to tell myself I will just do a little. It seems less difficult that way. Then I find myself fully involved afterward. It can take a lot of self encouragement to begin a new phase in one’s life. It takes real strength. That is in fact where the strong dwell.

An Honorable Life

Let your work become sincere, sincere about the results, and sincere about your purpose in doing it well. “Idle hands are the Devil’s work.” For Satanists however, they are the elite and are given real purpose, not the pawns on the board. Short cutting will not get anyone far and it is a place the majority will be found. To find the upper class requires a lot of dedication and determination. To stay out of jail requires that you are on guard as far as your influences go, to not be led there by foolish peers. Hopefully we will overcome the tragedy of committing an awful crime in our youth, because if we do not, we will have no future.

        Do not take what should not be your’s. Get your things in a legitimate fashion. Having respect for property is a sign of mental and social stability. For the sociopathic property doesn’t mean anything, even their own things do not matter. Vandalism is such a cowardly crime, one coming from people who would hide from you while doing it. There are some psychotic people who would trash stores and go around slashing the tires on people’s cars during early morning hours. You can truly see the sign of psychosis when it comes to people who do wrong without knowing it– as though it was natural. Then for some it is just a fun thing they want to be a part of and are equally crazy. These days we call “a Karen” an accuser making false accusations, unrealistic ones, desiring punishment for innocent people.

        Let us stay out of the fire. Let us not fight for any cause at all. Let us not be entangled by such things. Let us be safely seen through the tribulation by doing well and doing good. Instead of fighting any silly worldly battle let us be giving gifts to people and doing well on the earth. When God returns He will see it and we will be rewarded instead of punished. Maturity will see us through. Christian virtue will see us through. The wisdom of Jesus will keep us safe in God’s arms. In the meantime let us not be concerned with what happens along the way!

Faith And Hope

I am a person whose hope has been broken. I am not sure if that is a bad thing. In fact I think it is a good thing. I have no upsets. Everyone has at least a little upsets but mine are very minor. I was expecting something in the mail. The tracking even indicated that it arrived. There was a package in the office that was just the right shape for it. So I asked the staff for it. I told him it was probably “that top” package. He looked at it for a moment in the office, came back to me, and said “you didn’t get anything.” I was speechless. I couldn’t believe it. He saw this dreadful look on my face and then said “I was just kidding,” went back and brought my package to me and said, “I was just trying to make you laugh and smile.” I said, “it’s cool,” and went back to my room. It sounds like I was disturbed or something about it. I wasn’t, though. It is like the whole thing didn’t matter to me. It didn’t make me angry or any such thing.

        As far as my hope goes though, I don’t like the guy. He is supposed to be the receptionist but he is often outside. He doesn’t care about the job. He has his friends over with loud music playing in the office as soon as the staff leaves at 5 PM. My hope is he isn’t around much longer. That he gets a job elsewhere. That he is even fired, which is a thing he deserves. That might happen too. It should. The people who work here more often than not are cycled around. They are here for a little while before someone else comes in. It is a stepping stone job or something. I also hope and pray that my check comes in when someone more responsible is at the office. They are the ones who place our mail in the box.

        I have faith and hope just to have it. I said I don’t have hope but what I really mean is that I am working towards getting it back. Just in a way that I refuse to think the worst will happen or that things cannot be fixed. I want to believe more in the good than in the bad. I want to believe more of that than to disbelieve. I want to come to the realization that most problems can be solved. A personal phobia for me so long was that I would be sent back to jail. I don’t do anything that would put me there. My fears are unreasonable: bump into someone, go to jail for assault, jaywalk, short change the cashier, forget to pay when I plainly did, it borders on the delusional. My new year's resolution in fact was to worry less, in general. It is going well too.

        A period in my life where I truly had no worries was when I was unmedicated and homeless. I didn’t fear a thing in the world. I tested my mortality by drinking poisons. I had no fear of losing a home. I didn’t have one. It was my dream that the whole world would collapse into the apocalypse. I was always doing magic to raise ebola. Mark: delusional witchcraft. This was before covid was at all a thing. It was years before that. I was also using visualization magic to raise a terror in the world. Those of death, calamity, destruction, and war. Maybe I am he who took God’s cup (bowl) of wrath. Things never came so magically well together for me then at that time in my life. I wonder how much I would gain by being homeless again. I have become this fearful person that could not stand to lose it all. I believe these are ideas I should personally work on. To see that at the worst I am at least liberated. I do know one thing, my books will always follow me. I had great hopes for one book back then: my Christian Satanic Bible, the only book I wrote back then. Now I have over 50 books out there. One reason why I wrote them is because I wanted to live on, no matter where I was or what I was doing. I am out there in a sense.

Really Seeing The Light

Imagine being blind to something. Imagine looking at the unknown, the darkness. Imagine looking at a black hole, one that absorbs all things and is inescapable. There is even a saying for it, “seeing things in a dim light.” It is of things we do not want to look at, and so we never see them or ever know them. We then do not understand them. And what may be a monster is not one at all. Even as kids we were sure there were monsters in the dark and they were seen in every shadow.

        If we are really going to see things in the light then we must look at them and not close our eyes to them. We can’t do that thing that if our eyes are closed then it does not exist. What might have had a monstrous voice may turn out to be a puppy. Once we saw it, it didn’t turn out to be bad in any way. We can either go blindly and slowly through our problems or go through them boldly, quickly, and with all sureness.

        It is always good practice to turn a bad thing into a good thing. If that is at all possible then it should be done. If we can gain any good talent and ability to do so then we will be much better off in this life. We can take a miserable lot and make the best of it, or suffer a silent death when it occurs. Because of possible problems some will not even live. They have great things, but are afraid of losing them. Worry is added unto us, and might even cripple us. If you have the ability to go from rock bottom to the top quickly, then there is no better talent you can have. We all must face a rainy day. So let’s play in the rain. It’ll go and we will dry and the sun will return to warm us. In a manner of speaking, let's not drown in a puddle. Even in the heaviest water, let us swim with all our might. That means not depleting our strength before it happens and not giving up when it does. Make today a proud day of getting your life back together.

Karma and The Different Sides To Things

Karma is the principle that what you do comes back to you. It is a good thing to have faith in. It is a thing that exists in many religions and personal beliefs. Some of it is more sure than others. Doing wrong will lead to the worst of things. It is like a smaller fish and larger fish kind of thing. They are going to anger the wrong person sooner or later and it might not go easy on them. A lot of people get caught in crimes because they have become accustomed to it. They get greedier and more liberal with it. They may have made just one batch of crack to sell. They were careful in letting too many people over. Then over time it becomes a free for all. Many people came back and forth and they were noticed by law enforcement.

        People who are rude and hateful will anger the wrong person just by the way they act and live. Besides, no one is happy being that way.

        Even great kings are subject to war crimes. There really is a good force and a bad force at work in the world. I would add to that a gray force which has people that the universe doesn’t really know what to do with. The gray force is a self-creating thing. It is being encapsulated, self living, self contained, and isolated. The “light side” goes towards the flow of its own and so does the dark side. Those in the “dark” will be led to the same. When they get there they have their own substance to deal with. They harm the good side of things and the good side encourages the dark to give them retribution. That might not come right away. If it does then good: the bad has been corrected. If not then the penalty will be twice as much and twice as hard the next time until it becomes an absolute.

        The gray side is when the sea is parted. It is an area that people cannot reach as the light side is the right, the dark side is the left. Only by being gray can you truly know its own kind and go to where gray sided people go. The gray side is more likely to egg on bad people. They do so knowing just where it will take them. This is not done through things like harassment however. That is a dark sided thing. Rather, it is done just to dispel their power over the gray, to send it backwards where it came from. The gray side only takes the true gift and the true gift is the thing that was given with nothing at all expected in return. The gray would only give the things they really don’t care about. I find it hard personally to do such a thing. Everything I own has a purpose. I buy gifts, but only for my immediate family. The light side gives all at once. They give full of themselves too. They will surely be rewarded. The dark side has no problem with falsely begging, pretending to be poor, taking, stealing, whatever it is they have or could appreciate: if it costs their own dollar and their own work then they don’t have it. And surely every last thing they have will be returned to the light side from which it was taken. In the grave is their own lonely place.

        The gray side is a more earthly and worldly thing. It is being anchored in just the right way, both spiritually and physically. When loss comes to them they can handle it better. When the dark sided people are taken from then it is met with viciousness. When the light sided people are taken from “that’s just the way it goes,” but again, it will be returned to them, double, triple. As far as giving and taking on this earth goes: the dark sided will lose it all, the light sided will be given great things including what was taken from them by the dark sided, and the gray sided people possess things that belong to them, as it was honestly given to them or they earned it or some other such thing. That is one reason why “the middle realm” is the “gray realm.”

        With enough ill gotten gains the dark sided will end up in prison. That is a place where they truly have nothing. Nothing more than noodle comesaries, small tv, maybe a pocket radio, books, nothing of great importance. That is an act of karma. If the gray sided ever gets locked up it will most likely be for a low level crime. The light sided people are allotted the luxury of never being locked up. They have already locked those things away. They are locked into their monastery and monk establishments if anything at all. The dark sided  cannot maintain good religious practice and are the kind of people that are better off without it, as what they make of it are dangerous cults.. Cults that rob people, as is in their nature to do. You cannot put religion on a dark sided person and expect it to go well.

        For the dark side the cost for pleasure are things like obesity from overeating, losing all their money from gambling, getting STDs, being enslaved by drugs, being harmed by their peers, and losing their freedom. A light sided person will never know the effects of these things. They can’t enjoy them either. It seems like the most pleasurable things have always come at the highest price. The good do not die young. The bad die young, not the good. They get heart attacks, might be killed by their peers, overdose, get into wrecks from reckless driving, and a number of other things. It is an “only live once” philosophy for them. The key to gray sided life is found in moderation and balance and as far as the gray sided goes it is among the better attributes of it. Nearly everything is okay if done with moderation and balance. In fact it is not super healthy lifestyles from which one lives longer, but a careful line in the middle. That is true in some ways but not all ways. There are exceptions to the rules.

        On the gray side you will not find a person fighting for a cause. Not unless they strictly involve them anyway. Not until that trouble comes to their door would they act against it group and purpose wise. It is a non sided way of being. That can be an irritating thing about the gray sided . While one is in a group to be against another group, which is in the nature of groups, we find the ones that are fine at being both of them. They will dismiss any possibility of it. They will invalidate their existence.

        The Dark Sided  are always on the run. They will eventually get caught. If they have enough power behind them then perhaps they will go further and be more or less free in what they do. They especially have that liberty when they are among their own kind and their own kind are in larger numbers. That depends on the sort of place they inhabit. The light sided are more open air people and do not have that nature of hiding. They don’t need it. Quite the opposite. They are by nature more freely going and freely speaking unless they are protecting themselves against the bad side. The Gray Sided are more inwardly and private. They are secretive, but not hiding anything bad. They don’t care to do the world good with what they say and encourage. They don’t do the kinds of things that must be kept secretive, either.

        Basically: the light is dim but steady. The dark burns out quick but bright, and the gray.. Well, you can figure out the rest.

Finding A “Mini-Purpose,” or Finding a Unique Purpose

When I couldn’t do things for myself I decided to do them for Satan. I actually set up chores that I would do for him. I was rewarded by it too.

Good deeds can make your day better. They don’t have to be great or difficult. Just any good deed. Give someone something you know they would want. Mail a little gift to your family. Do you have a favorite sibling? Or maybe your parents would just appreciate getting a letter. I like to buy inexpensive cards online. They come out to just a few dollars. I get cards of things that I know my brother would like, most of all. He liked things like Star Wars and The Raiders. Just today I mailed him out two Star Wars cards that came from the late 70s. It didn’t even add to ordinary postage. I do the same with stickers and religious things. I mail Chrisitan bookmarks and cards to my aunt. For my father it is The Broncos, Godzilla, or Thor. So I send him out stickers and cards, whatever makes for no additional postage.

The good deed could be for yourself too. Consider it a thing that your present self gives to your future self. Like a nice shower, cleaning your living areas, washing clothes, cooking a meal that is better than ordinary, or whatever else.

I often pass by Christians who give me their reading material. They are normally just a page of things written on them. I appreciate those, and I read them. For a Christian things like that are important to them.

Making a Church doesn’t have to be a serious matter though. You could make a retro gaming Church. That would be cool!

Some things that you learn take a great deal of time, study, and practice. Such as learning a new language or learning computer programming. There are some useful talents you could learn though that just take a week. I learned how to read music in a week. Writing it takes a bit longer unless you are just creating songs. I would say that it takes natural talent to write songs. As long as you aren’t making octets or composing music for a full symphony, it doesn’t take but a few weeks to get it all down. I would have learned it more quickly if “time signatures” were not confusing me. Sewing: I can’t say from experience but that looks easy enough. It is fabric and a sewing machine and a little bit of technique. I did work with leather, which wasn’t too difficult to learn. My mother got a quick certificate to learn nursing and be a nurse. There are jobs of degrees then there are jobs of certificates. The certificates are far easier. I have a food handling certificate and all I had to learn was some common sense food safety. So there are many things you can learn and get good at quickly. It might be a better choice than getting a full degree that costs a lot and takes a lot of time. I mean if you have it in you, then all the better, just be honest with yourself.

Maybe you can make a small not-for-profit. Something manageable. Something of pride. Something easy to execute and keep together. Something not too demanding but something that would help a few people everyday. You could help the homeless get shoes or socks, or give them a cold drink, and honestly you don’t even have to be running a not for profit to do it, and that’s all up to you. Cold drinks were hard to come by when I was homeless. People that donated to us always gave us lukewarm bottles of water. There were water fountains around that had colder water than what they gave. I would hang around McDonald's.         Since they had free refills the customers would leave a cold and full fountain drink nearby after they were done inside. I have a home now and have for some time. I can say that the things I take for granted, even a cold cup of iced tea, were things I cherished while homeless, believe me.

I think that a donation bin should be added to the garbage bins. Things that a person donates to, to be used towards helping others. People throw away some expensive things and for a poor person those things might be highly valued and useful. I live in a hotel that sort of has something like that. It has the same effect anyway. We leave things we no longer want beside the garbage bins. I have put a coffee maker there before and yesterday I put an old ice maker out there. For myself I got a really nice little cabinet.

It is a thing in San Francisco where people put nice things beside the garbage bins or just some place where others can see and take it if they wish. I got a printer that although it no longer printed, it could still scan, which was what I mostly needed it for anyway. I have found books and other things that way. I found things I would only take if I was homeless, such as clothing and blankets. Nowadays I worry about getting lice. I have suffered from full body lice in the past. It is a miserable thing.

If you get together with some of your friends you might come up with an idea to work on. That is a way that a lot of good businesses and products are made. What was just a little idea quickly blew up into a larger one. You and your friends might become totally dedicated towards it and that can be the chance of a lifetime to create something lucrative. A good plan is always a good thing. They are worth coming up with and acting on. It could make you a self-employed person. The only question is: what do you want to do?

Yes, a good thing thought up is a powerful thing. You don’t even have to have a group behind it. It can be thought up on your own. To make a good new invention is only the right thought away.

        

Contracted Living

I have seen a lot of “gathered living” homes in my time. Some of them are religious based. They expect you to study the gospel and attend their religious groups. Some just pull in people from jail or mental hospitals who need a quickly gotten home. I have been in those where they take an unfair amount of SSI. I have been in a gathered living home that was run by a Church lady. She didn't expect us to be religious in any way. One time I went to one of those places that expect you to study the bible and things and it was obviously a cult-like setting and as soon as they left the room I left the building. They wanted my wallet and my phone. You could say that military training is the same idea. People living together. Program based. There are group homes, boarding care homes, shared living, “co-ops,” and all sorts of gathered living places.

        They may have curfews to them. They may expect chores out of you. They take your money, more or less. They may be made up of mental health groups. They might have religious qualities to them. They could even expect you to cook for everyone and have stricter and more difficult jobs than the others. Sometimes life is the job. The job just happens to have a place to sleep. A small place to sleep in fact. The rest of the time you are working for a company. Reminds me of a beehive or something like that. If it was a place making video games or something I don’t think I would mind. So long as I wasn’t doing the difficult programming. Some such companies don’t even pay a whole lot. They do let you out into the world and take you to special places for “inspiration” though.

        These kinds of living conditions have only increased. I call it contracted living. They all have their own rules and things. They split up the costs between many. They all have their caveats. They either ask too much out of a person or generally take it easy on them, just satisfied by your rent being paid. I think a subscription based hotel thing would be really neat: you can go from hotel to hotel in a traveling sort of way all the time. In the future great buildings will build themselves through machinery such as drones, robotics, androids, 3D printers, and who knows what all else. Living spaces will then be more abundant and everyone will have at least one home. It might even be that the help you are is more important than your money. Like on the Enterprise for example. Star Trek paints such a picture. They don’t have money in the future. So the crew aboard the spaceship aren’t being paid. Yet they have all they need. They have replicators, the holodeck, and all else. They get to explore space and sometimes take a small vacation out there before returning to duty. So, as I was saying, it is their help that matters, not their money. Maybe the future is more about bartering than it is money.

        I prefer to live alone though. I prefer to have my own room, that is. I feel safer in a hotel room anyway. An apartment by itself is out in the wide open and easy to prey upon. As long as I sleep and can be in my room alone then I am happy about my place. I have far more in my room than anyone else in this building. Maybe it is because I don’t do drugs and I don’t spend all of my money on fast food. I am very mindful of what I buy. We are all mostly made up of Schizophrenic people here. Hell as far as I know, everyone of us is. Believe me, as soon as we get off of medication we are homeless in no time. Fortunately people care enough to put me into one of their homes. I wish the same for all: guaranteed homes. Even if that doesn’t mean guaranteed income, I wish we would all be guaranteed a home!

        People donate food to this hotel. We have a large kitchen with a store-like refrigerator for the food they bring. They made the laundry mats free for us recently and that was an enormous help. There is a laundry mat literally a block away, but still. There is a large flat screen TV in the kitchen area. It plays internet TV. They recently also established free wi-fi for this house. I pay for my own internet, however. I think a point I make is that technology is becoming just a thing to have that everyone can afford. WiFi used to only be found in the least of places. Flat screen TVs used to cost an arm and a leg. I have to wonder how it is going to affect the prison system. Are we going to expect the jailed to live like primitive people? Like for them a cave but for the rest such luxury? The last time I was in jail they had new movies playing on TV all the time. The kind that would make you think they illegally downloaded them. It depends on where the prison is. An American prison would probably feed its inmates very well if something like a food replicator was invented.

With replicators imagine what would happen to all of these fast food places and grocery stores. What an effect that would have as far as restaurants and things go would have to be drastic. It is a part of the future I hope and pray for everyday.

Some More Futurism

We will be able to change shows and movies on the fly. We will have a device or an internet software to turn things into the style of something else. Such as “as a 60s show”, as (this) show, with “these people,” and so on. So we might have the same show, only with Seinfeld characters or something like that. I had predicted for some time that AI will be able to auto generate video, as you instruct it to. In no time at all that suddenly came about. Now AI is making videos, art, music, even video games. They are saying that nothing caught on as quickly as ChatGPT did, the tech that I am talking about. With video games.. It means that any game based on any past franchise could be rapidly produced with little to no programming by the person having it made. Obviously that is blatantly against copyright which will be an issue either dealt with or not, and if not, it could destroy entire companies. Celebrity images themselves are a part of that. It is funny to think how far we have come. We can have a movie made starring our favorite celebrity without it costing a dime. When CGI becomes lifelike, and some less important things, what once cost a studio millions of dollars is now made by a kid at home. The question is: even if studios don’t want the tech around, would they use it themselves? All sorts of things are being auto generated by AI. In the future, books might be more about feeding instructions to AI telling it what to create. As a result, a book about a video game you want made will replace any human programming. Here is the more interesting thing: you can instruct it to have variations, so every game is at least a little different. If you would rather, you could also make a movie script. They would be written in such a way that the AI knows how to make it, according to your wishes. Maybe a movie theater will play a different version of the same thing with every showing. Just give it the time to gather it all together and have it made. So long as CGI looks entirely lifelike.

In the future a person will be more and more able to be in a group while in their home. The interaction with them and synthetic worlds will become more realistic. There was one thing I thought would come later but is already being made: which are touch gloves. I couldn’t imagine how they would be made but technicians always find a way. They use little pockets of compressed air. It’s like picking an apple from a tree that you feel in your hand. Maybe they will find a way to incorporate smell and taste too, someday. There was another thing I couldn’t realize that they have also recently made: shoes that let you walk without going forward. Those are obviously helpful for VR. Headsets are becoming less bulky too, like augmented reality glasses. Then last night I came across one extra thing: this device that lets you speak into it so softly that no one at all can hear you speaking except for people online. I imagine this large window into the internet world, or a set of them, that shows your friends or family when they wish to be seen. It would be like a thing where you can have your loved ones near you even when you live far away from them. Like they are a part of your house. Further down the line it would be just like they are there with you, through holograms and solid energy.

A home will truly be a castle. A castle with android and robotic servants. A home they always clean. A home guarded: by those and by special cameras, protected with solid energy. Your 100 inch TV will come from your augmented reality glasses. You can have a rock band or classical quartet performing in front of you through holograms. Food replicators will mean you never have to go to the grocery store or even have things to cook with. Why would you even have a refrigerator with one of those? Energy can become free energy. I have heard that is scientifically impossible but if you change matter into energy the result is so abundant an amount that it might as well be free. Holodecks will turn a little space into an unlimited amount of space. With these voice understanding things we have we can tell it all what to do, how, and when. We can wake up and say “make my coffee,” and the machines get to work. We could say “get the shower ready,” “make my breakfast,” “wash my laundry,” or “bring my mail.” We might have a control box for certain things. Just press the button for what you want your devices to do. Or you could set up a daily routine for them.

Wireless electricity, super long lasting batteries, would do a lot of good. We will get to where we can replace limbs. We can cure diabetes and cancer. We can cure any illness. We can restore sight. We can increase intelligence. We can cure mortality. We can fix obesity. We can stop starving. We can house everyone. We can increase resources. We can bring about universal basic income. We can be less greedy by having more. We can fix crime. We can deter it through tech. We can bring about a utopia. I am sure we can.

Church of the Retro Gods

There are churches out there that are made by fans of certain things. That is about celebrities most of all. My idea is a Church of Nostalgia. One where people can delight in the past. A Church Of The Things Of Old. The hymn would be a showing of the original TMNT cartoon opening followed by the one from DuckTales. Idols would be all around, of characters. Statues of the Turtles. The one at the organ plays “Dancing Mad,” from Final Fantasy 3 (6.) The preacher preaches things such as the lessons from an old show that was always full of them (like Family Matters perhaps.) For a set donation you get a basket of really old games. For tithes, such things are given. So they tithe a copy of the NES Ninja Gaiden 2, and the one that donates the right amount will get it. There can even be auctions in the place. First, you watch the auction scene from Final Fantasy 6. That’ll get everyone in the mood. You might get to watch speed runs from good players playing tough NES games. Teddy Rubskin is an idol at the altar.

        There is an arcade machine room in the Church. There might be a museum of old things for the Church members to purvey. Things such as really old video games and old consoles, old toys, rows of action figures, play sets like the HeMan one, and so on.

        You can finally find your old VHS tapes. You even have a member of the Church that fixes VHS players (as well as old game consoles and cassette players.) You can find all of your old cartoons in the library. If you are a member you can freely borrow from the library. The library contains old video games and old systems, old toys, old magazines (think Nintendo Power, EGM, or things like that.) Old CDs too, old cassettes, old books, old everything. It is a privilege for Church members.

        The people who run the Church do not wear robes. They wear things from old games and things such as old TMNT shirts. Their uniform is one of nostalgia. Might have an 80s fanny pack. Might have “holy jeans” or be clad in neon colors.

        The holidays are all about the birthday of these old things, or their anniversary. Whatever that is for: an old game, old cartoon, classic cult movie, ect. Then there can be “80s day” and “90s day” and if the Church is around long enough we will get into things like “30s day.” Pamphlets you hand out can be something like “celebrate (  ) day with us this Sunday at (  ), bring your retro clothing!”

        That is a free idea from me to you so take it if you want to, and run with it. Actually all of my ideas are free.

Things I commonly Go Over (That You May Have Missed)

There is my “credit coin” new economic system. Prices are based on credit coins. There are nine of them perhaps. They each hold the same value, unlike a dollar being less than a five dollar bill. With the credit coin system, the one is worth as much as the 9. It depends on your name. Your name and the product present a credit coin cost. That is based on the letters of your name and how they coincide with the product name. However many of the same letters there are between the two determines the credit coin used. So if there are three letters that the product name also has, then the cost is a 3 credit coin. Actually it doesn’t start at one but starts at zero in case no letters are the same.

There is the Principality List . It is a list that one finds their occult identity and the occult identity of those they love the most. You and them are given four attributes. Those attributes are able to be seen in all movies, shows, games, books, music, and so on. Here is the list of that:

Person One: Red, Hand, Bird, Staff

Person Two: Bear, Bee, Cane, Brown

Person Three: Green, Rabbit, Seed, Stage

Person Four: White, Goat, Ring, Thief (my own, personally.)

Person Five: Red, Whip, Cat, Fairy

Person Six: Yellow, Rodent, Wind, Lord/Ruler

Person Seven: Bomb/Blast/Wand, Fox, Black, Beast

Person Eight: Horse, Toad, Yellow, Dust

Person Nine: Creature, Lion/Tiger, Word, Assassin

Person Ten: Blue, Spirit, Stone, Elephant

Person Eleven: Dragon, Mask, Purple, Dog/Wolf

Person Twelve: Any four of your own making.

The oldest one of those in your group is the first and the youngest is the eleventh. If you wish to be the twelfth you can be. Otherwise you fit in according to age as well. If there are eleven of you then you have the highest amount. There might be only four of you. And so only the first four are taken.

Third, I have made an incredibly effective way of remembering old things. It is done by taking a small pocket dictionary (containing only basic words and conveniently putting it into your pocket) and remembering things based on the random words you see. So if you see the word “tree,” you have yourself remember things like tree houses and climbing them, or maybe you got a kite stuck in a tree, or a ball.

Fourth, my best advice for making music. It is simple but effective. It is to emphasize the triad of the scale. That is, C, E, and G for C Major, and A, C, and E for A minor. By repeating them, giving them longer duration, and using them more often, your music will never sound atonal.

Fifth, my favorite video gaming idea. It is to have color light buttons on the gamepad. So the four action buttons can be any color. Two of them can be the same color. Maybe all of them can be the same color at times. The lights all mean something. You can interact with a person in a green robe by simply pressing down the green button. There might be a red robed guy near him that you can conveniently talk to with the press of the red button. Red might mean “stop” and green “go.” Yellow might mean a message is waiting for you. You can warp based on color. A color lighting up may mean that something has changed or that something is ready. A color might indicate that a special attack is ready. That is my idea for a game pad and again, all of my ideas are free.

Sixth, there is my favorite Satanic chant, out of the ones I have made, this is my best:

“Do the shake, do the shake, do the wake, do the hip-py shake.”

Daylight come mon, me wanna go home

Isa Day Isa  Day Isa  Day-yay-yull..

Some Good Rules To Have In Life

Be Generic

Don’t pour out a lot of talk. People will appreciate you and what you say more if you limit its amount. Knowledge is power, power that another can use against you, but if you only have a little to say (if anything at all) they will have nothing to work with.

Tell Them “No”

Learn to say “no.” It might be difficult at first but it gets easier, trust me. I have lived in so many environments where people were always asking me for things. For as long as I complied with them I was angry about it. I was mad at their incapacity to get their own things. But I reached a point where everything and anything another asked for from me was denied.

Don’t Squander Your Things

I once had a problem pawning all of my things. Anything I could sell I would. Fortunately I broke through that habit and now have a lot of great things. Don’t give away your things. You never know when you might need them later. If you have a hoarding habit then the best thing you can do is carefully store it all away: in storage containers, keeping it all out of sight.

Choose Happiness Over Anger

Just go home, shut the door, and know you will be left alone. Just be aware that angry people will lead their own selves into trouble, just as naturally as can be for them. Such small things can take a grip on us and knowing that human life is not perfect helps. Focus instead on things you enjoy. You can either repeat nasty things said to you or turn to your better things, enjoying them.

Be Strong

Self pity can take a grip on us. Especially when we start personalizing things. We get a “how can we go on or continue” perspective we should instead decide to be strong. Feelings of being cheated, being treated unfairly, and especially when we feel like victims, are the worst perspectives we could have.

Create a Routine

One that starts off a good day and makes it go by in both a predictable and pleasant way. Bring any good thing you can into it.

Find a Great Purpose

It might be your side job. It might be a good creative habit that can change things for you in the future whether you are after money, fame, or both. It is to take a little time in the day to pursue your dreams and who knows, it might become a full time job.

Be Competitive

Striving to be the best can be a great motivation. So practice and work a lot in honing in on that level of perfection needed to be the best.

Be Alone

Be a person of unique inspiration, by being unique. Go against the regular flow. Come up with your own opinions and perspectives regarding any given thing. Do not suffer the harm that can come from groups. Work in a way that you are the only one at all near you that knows of it.

Have An Ace In Your Pocket

Be ready for the worst. Come up with a good plan. Have all you need for a rainy or stormy day. Set up those things that can improve your future life. Procure savings, and if at all possible set up something that generates regular money on its own.

Survive

If you have reached middle age then you can know you are at least middle better than all other people. If you reach old age then that is quite an accomplishment. If you can go from rock bottom to having a great place then you can have the future hope of being able to do so again.

Be Mature

Don’t get yourself into a lot of trouble. There are people quick to the gun. They were overridden by difficult things so much that they resorted to slaughter. There is no future for such people. People who are to live well, safe, and free, must find maturity in life over the kind of degradation that comes from criminality.

Magic as Wonder

I used to call them “texturals,” what they have come to call Memes. My word meant three things: text, scripture, and image. Long ago my favorite one was the “it is dangerous to go alone” scene from Zelda. For me these were things to meditate on. I imagine they could even be a part of a new Bible of some kind. Images are important to me. They are more like idols to me. So for that I have a laminator and have my favorite ones in my pocket (actually, my fanny pack.) I also have my favorite tarot cards laminated and placed in my wallet. I meditate on those.

        I also use the other definition of magic here. In fact they are more alike than is known. That is, the “wonderful” things. That includes things that are highly stimulating. It includes things that are very immersive. It is made up of parts like the soundtrack to a game (Nobuo Uematsu is effective at it), and a story that is involving. A magical and wonderful experience is the magic I am talking about here. How do we get back some of that magic as adults? We have to put ourselves back into those old shoes. We have to look at it as we remember it. When we watch an old cartoon in the eyes of our youth, but as adults, a magical effect occurs. Crystals in the mind are lit up from a familiar place being brought back to life, as best as I can explain it.

        There are places we can go that are wonderful themselves. It could be a beach on the other side of earth. It could be in the mountains, in a cabin, near the forest. It could be as simple as going to the beach for the first time. It could be seeing the Roman Colosseum for the first time.

        A magical thing for children was creating things. There are a large number of toys that are about building or creating, no doubt. Crafts can be a fun thing to gather for and put together. You could even just get a random set of things from time to time and figure out how to put it together later. When I was homeless I bought some blank CDs, cards, and wide clear tape. That was during a short time when I had SSI while homeless. I basically made a plastic sheet of mirrors and poker cards. A guy that passed by me called it a work of art and a masterpiece as though that was what I was doing. Then later I got thread and plastic straws and made a sort of curtain from that. These were just some cheap things I got at the store. You never know what you may turn into art. I had a rectangular piece of glass once and some black nail polish that I made into a ouija board. Fumes might have gotten to me on that one.

        I say play with your action figures. Whose to know? What makes it so indicative as childish anyway? What is the reason adults can’t do the same? Because it is childish? A tall adult swing is wonderful. A heated pool all your own is too. A stay at a hotel can be wonderful, even for a night, even when it is just in a city away. So is watching the movie you want to see the most at a large and nice theater. So cast away doubts and believe the fantasy for a moment, because real life is never that good.

The Magic And Power of The World

There are greater powers out there. What kind of isolation we are in reminds me of the most secure prison anyone could imagine. Like Alcatraz, only Alcatraz is Earth and if there's any life far, far, far out there, I doubt we could get over there ourselves. The time has come to cast away the fear over that and to live it up, as we have turned from cave people to god-like beings.

        Just think about the very profoundness of it all. For every ten feet there may be a person or a small group there. Everyone with their own lives. Everyone with their own unique history. Every kind of person you can think of talking to each other just as uniquely. There are people on boats right now, from small boats to cruise ships. There are people by rivers and lakes right now fishing, and people out there with nets catching fish as we speak. Then there are people eating fish in restaurants. There might even be a person eating a puffer fish right now (deadly if not cooked right.) There are people building small houses, then people just improving their home in any way you can think of, people working on skyscrapers too. For every book there is, there might be a person reading it. For every song a dozen people listen to it. Some just started them. Some halfway through. Others are just finishing. Yes, the profoundness, the “thickness of existence” is unimaginable, even on this little blue planet.

        For every person that lives there is a great deal more of the things we have created. Some companies put out millions of products. Given the small size of most things, maybe other than cars and homes, they vary in size and are found everywhere. Even a small storage tub can have a hundred neat things inside. In other words, the treasure of earth is great. There is far more of it than there are people on the earth. That includes things made by people long gone.

        I have mentioned it before but would like to say it again: the things you buy have a greater life than you realize. They just aren’t toys for the kids. As for you being a kid and having toys some of it is probably very valuable by now. It has probably exchanged hands many times before it came into the lot of a collector. It may even come into an auction someday. Even if it doesn’t become highly valuable though, it has a long life going from place to place. In effect you don’t give it to one person, you give it to thousands of people.

Shopping is one of the funnest things for me. Except for the crowds in the store anyway, and except for paranoid suspicion my mail was stolen. I try to have a taste that includes simple and cheap things but things nonetheless a joy to have.

In entertainment form, things are great in number too, and increasing rapidly. Our old shows and movies are being redone for better or worse. Personally I liked Blade Runner 2049 better than the original. They preserved the essence of it and included more interesting characters and a better story. Some are disappointments but never say “the end.” They were saying for a while that Star Trek Enterprise was going to be the last Star Wars series. Nope, and I didn’t believe so. I love that new games are being made for old consoles. Some of it is awful, like meant for a system older than what they made it for (graphics were not up to standard.) However they do a good job sometimes.

Just think about how far we have come food wise. There was a time that local food only came from local farmers. There was a time that we may have only had a handful of fruit to eat from. There was a time when spices cost their weight in gold. Then just think about a fully loaded pizza with sauce mixed just the right way and contains four types of cheese. Having hamburgers that come into whatever form we want them, or a chicken sandwich if we prefer. Soda instead of water. Apple cider, hot chocolate, whatever you want, you can have. So you can be an orange juice person or a grape juice person, or be exactly unlike me: liking apple juice.

The same thing can be said about our clothing. It can be cheap plastic fibers or cotton, cotton or wool, wool or silk. We have gained the zipper and the velcro. We can wear hoodies if we want or baseball caps. We can wear shoes, boots, or sandals. We can have what colors we want, even purple. We can have designs on them which mean things. There are a number of belts to choose from and we can add things like fanny packs if we want. There are cargo pants (my preference) or carpenter pants, blue jeans, sweat pants, shirts, or dresses, whatever we want.

It goes all over the board, these things. We have it all within our reach. We don’t have to travel to some far away city to get it either. We can pick from it taking our time and have it delivered to our very door. So if what we want is gold, crystal, turquoise, jade, silver, plastic, wood, or even complex circuitry, we can get it.

Now watch aliens come and take it all. What if Earth is a production factory for them? It wouldn’t be any worse than how we gather animals: animals that we feed and groom, that in every respect consider us their friends, until the day we put them under an ax and cook them up. Guess that’s a topic of its own.

We see places more and more which contain a large number of old things. Things like toy and video game conventions. It can be impressive how often you see things you haven’t before, even though you are always looking. There is always some bootleg you knew nothing about. There are things that strike nostalgia more than others. I have found that the most potent memories of mine come from seeing toys and childhood things I have forgotten all about. One of them for me was the fisher price movie projector. It is always worth my time to buy something such as a viewmaster and some slides I had at one time. Or an old video game magazine– so frozen in time, so unaware of things to come, living in its own moment.

        I believe that science is capable of virtually anything. It takes a pretty high extreme for it to not be able to do something. I think that things like living forever and creating gold are possible. After all, we can create diamonds. I always use the example of how far we have come in the last hundred years. That if we showed what we have to those that are far back what they would think and what they would have to say about what is possible and what isn’t. That includes a thing as simple as a compact disk. Such a thing would appear god-like even a hundred years ago.

        Another thing about science is it is worth waiting on. It is unpredictable though. We never know what will come about or when, or even what. That is because we are not such geniuses as to know how. The smartest person in and of themself could not create the bulk of it or even conceptualize its possibility. It is possible one way but not another. That one way that it is only needs to be figured out. They say that lightsabers are impossible because you cannot stop light like that. But if you can have a hovering tip then you can have that stop the light. Or the hovering tip itself can pull the beam downward making a downward going beam instead of an upward going one. My point is, that there is always a solution. We may not be able to go to Mars yet but at least when we do we can go there in style and maybe even the purpose of terraforming it, if we become able to do that before we are able to travel there.

My Favorite Entertainment

I believe that a good movie is good therapy. Storytelling has always been with us. People used to say them by the campfire. We always wanted to tell them better and that purpose has driven a lot of technology. So we made plays. We made orchestras and operas. We made radio, then TV, story based music, and video games. That purpose continues to this day as it all becomes more realistic and immersive.

I once could afford at best a 32 inch CRT TV which weighed a ton and cost an arm and a leg. The store had 40 inch screens in the early 2000s which cost a thousand dollars. I have the same thing at this time which cost about 200 dollars. A dream of my youth was having more video games. They were fifty dollars each and the highest tech of the time to play them are trivial by today’s standards. What would have cost hundreds of dollars for the console alone now costs about fifty dollars with dozens of games preinstalled. People make “randomizers” for games now. It shuffles all of the items up and gives you objectives in order to win the game. So the most powerful weapon can be in any chest. I watch gamers compete that way. The items are shuffled up the same with player one as player two. In the dark age of entertainment me and my family were renting VCRs. We had HBO a little after that. I watched Tales From The Crypt and maybe shouldn’t have been allowed to. That’s because I kept my parents up all night after that thinking there was a monster in my room, and I was afraid.

I played outside a lot with my family and friends. Sometimes I would look for crystals in gravel. I was really young when I was looking for magic wands from the best trees. There were a few nearby parks that we would go to. One was called Conchas Dam, another Oasis Park, one closer by called Ned Houk Park, then there was Caprock another. There was a small cabin we rented into while at Conchas. Oasis had a warm desert like climate, with sand dunes me and my siblings would play on. Like at Ned Houk Park (that used to be called Running Water Draw) there was a bench with a grill beside it. We would roast marshmallows and cook hotdogs and burgers on them. We were sometimes with the aunt and other family. We would climb trees and there were play areas for kids like monkey bars and swings. I still like the tall adult swings. I haven’t been on one of those in ages.         

        I got my first physical form movie when I was ten years old, during the Christmas of 1990. It was a VHS tape of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Movie. Everyone in elementary school was talking about the movie. The cartoon too. It was the popular thing at the time and you were either in or out. I watched that tape dozens of times. I held onto it until I was 19 years old. I even had to tape back together the tape where it snapped. Bill and Ted were my role models for a moment. They lead me into being kind of goofy though. It was a weird way of being cool, being an 80s kid. Later they made this toy that let you do air guitar with sounds.

        The games I played the most were Super Mario Bros 1, 3, and Super Mario World. Mega Man 4, Ninja Gaiden 2, The Legend of Zelda, The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past, Gameboy Tetris, Metroid 2: Return of Samus, Mario Land 2, The Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening, SimCity, Street Fighter 2, Mortal Kombat, Donkey Kong Country, Super Mario All Stars, Super Mario Kart, Final Fantasy 2 (SNES), Final Fantasy 3 (SNES), Super Metroid, Super Mario Paint, and sometime later Final Fantasy 8. I also enjoyed playing Guitar Hero with my family. My preferred video game magazine was EGM. The system that I got the most joy out of was the SNES.

        My early cartoons and movies came from the 80s. They include things like Neverending Story, “Saturday Morning TV,” “The Wonderful World of Disney,” The Rainbow Bright Movie (my tastes were androgynous as a kid), The Brave Little Toaster (that one had such dark and somber moments to it), Care Bears, The Gummi Bears, the original TMNT cartoon, The Real Ghostbusters, the more obscure The Raccoons cartoon, and older things too. I watched a lot of older cartoons such as Hong Kong Phooey, Fat Albert, Looney Tunes, MGM cartoons, Mickey Mouse (and Donald Duck which I was more into), among others. Later I got into the more dark set cartoon Batman The Animated Series. Beavis and Butthead when I was a teenager. Something that was unlike anything else, the start of cartoons being made more for adults. Ren and Stimpy kind of touched on that. Beavis and Butthead was the first controversial cartoon in its way. South Park would outdo that by quite a bit.

        I was going through the VHS tapes that a store in a mall had when I found my first anime to watch. I was 18 years old. The tape I got was of Ninja Scroll. It is an awesome anime. The next one for me would be Vampire Hunter D. Then a little while later I was getting into Dragon Ball Z. I saw a lot of my favorite anime for the first time on Adult Swim. For you future people who may not have Adult Swim anymore, it is just a segment of more adult content played after a certain hour on a cartoon channel. Super Milk Chan was very cute, Samurai Champloo, Attack On Titan, Cowboy Bebop, are some of my favorite Anime. My most favorite is the short lived but oh so excellent The Twelve Kingdoms. Princess Mononoke is a good one. So is Tokyo Godfathers. And of course, Akira.

        My parents let me watch R rated movies when I was young. So in the 80s I was enjoying the Conan movies, Robocop, Total Recall, Terminator, Predator, Kick Boxer, other Jean Claud Van Dam movies (who was a role model of mine for a time.) We watched about every good thing out there. I enjoyed Legend, The Princess Bride, Willow, Beetlejuice, Back to the Future, Dragon Slayer, Krull (80s fantasy movies were a favorite genre of mine, and is a genre that is finally getting recognition.) Yes, I annoyed it all a great deal.         If there was one 80s movie I missed, it was Blade Runner. It flew under the radar or something. I just saw it for the first time recently.

        My favorite 90s movies include Interview With The Vampire, Pulp Fiction, The Odyssey, Merlin (mini series), The Pianist, Schindler's List, Batman Returns, Braveheart, Misery (I am big on Stephen King movies), Girl Interrupted and Prozac Nation. I would take 80s movies over 90s movies any day though.

My first cassette tape, my first thing of physical music at all, was the Genesis tape of I Can’t Dance. My dad was buying us each a cassette tape at the time. Maybe that was just me and my brother John, I can’t remember exactly. He got a Paula Abdul tape. I was too young to really know the difference between any of them. I have no idea why I chose what I did. I sure enjoyed it though, every song. I still like Phil Collins. I was 9 years old when we all got a pocket radio. My favorite song was “We Didn’t Start The Fire,” from Billy Joel. I loved to hear it each and every time it came on the radio. I also liked Love Shack and If I Could Turn Back Time to play on the radio. I had no music videos at all until I got cable except times like being at my grandparents home or some place that had cable like at a cabin in Ruidoso NM. I loved it every bit. There were only a few songs I ever didn’t like. I would get annoyed if they played. One of those was “no rain” by Blind Melon. Later on the number of music videos I disliked increased. Get older, get cynical. I had to tape what I wanted to keep. Everyone was into Madonna. I consider her the Marylin Monroe of my time. There was Sinead O'Connor and “Nothing Compares to You,” and from Tom Petty “Don’t Come Around Here No More,” there was “Love Shack,” “You Might Think I’m Crazy,” and Janet Jackson, Paula Abdul, among others. They were fun songs. It was pop music as much as pop music could be. Meanwhile though I was listening to things like Slayer, Danzig, Morbid Angel, MegaDeth, and, a bit differently, Type O Negative. I got kicked out of the house after a fight involving me and trying to get a Deicide cassette. My grandmother was taking us all to get school clothing and allowed us to get one tape. The one I got was that. It erupted into a fight between me and my father. I was childish about it all, honestly. I had to leave to live with my biological father. I had already been into it all for a while though. Before that happened I had gotten a lot into Slayer and the rest. I got into Megadeth from a Native American man with a band in Arizona called “Black Mountain.” He gave me a Megadeth tape. One of my favorite albums is Youthanasia by them. Every song on that is a good one, too. I had very limited access to metal. If it wasn’t tape it was CD. When we went out of town the radio stations might be playing metal, which I taped. There was also a metal radio segment where I lived, and so taped what they had, always making requests.

Type O Negative was its own thing altogether. Certainly the best goth metal. My favorite album of theirs will always be October Rust. I have been into about every genre at one time or another. In the early 90s I was getting into gangster rap. At the same time I was watching Metallica’s Unforgiven music video and a couple of Aerosmith songs. You might get a serious metal song or two but those were hard to come by. I performed my first Satanic ritual to King Diamond’s The Eye album. I was even into bubble gum pop though. When Aqua came out with their first album I couldn’t deny its pleasant peculiarity. Growing up we listened to a lot of 80s country music. My favorite two were High Cotton and God Bless The USA. the 80s is my favorite era of country music for sure. My mother swears up and down about the 70s. Which is natural, we all like our own generation the most. I listened to grunge music more than anything else in the 90s. I do remember seeing Smells Like Teen Spirit for the first time. There was also The Smashing Pumpkins, Pearl Jam, Stone Temple Pilots, The Cranberries, Garbage, and Fiona Apple.         

Music and Videos For My Followers:

Just find them online anywhere. Like YouTube. Searching them should bring them all up just fine even if you have no idea what the title means. Here is my playlist for you and for all of those that may consider me their leader:

Mantrid Vs. Brizon

Interview With The Vampire: Lestat’s Piano Sonata

Legend: Lilly’s [Lili] Dark Dance

The Devil’s Rejects: Free Bird

Gay Rainbow: Rainbow Bright, Robot Chicken

Honey Mustard Reveals What The Great Beyond Is Really Like

Ninja Gaiden 2: The Dark Sword of Chaos, Opening

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990) Opening

Final Fantasy 8: Gatling Gun Attack

Final Fantasy 10s “Spring Scene”

No Doubt: Spiderwebs

Eric Idle “Always Look on the Bright Side of Life

Samael: Slavocracy

Betty Boop: Judge for a Day

Blade Runner: Tears in Rain

Enigma: Goodbye Milky Way

Family Guy: Iraq Lobster

Anarchy In Gotham (Ending to The Joker)

South Park: Van Halen

Sixpence None The Richer: Don’t Dream It’s Over

Enigma: The Child in Us

Final Fantasy 8: Ending

Castlevania Requiem: SOTN, Fairy Song

Final Fantasy 6: Terra’s Theme

Truck Chase Scene from Terminator 2

Final Fantasy 9: Melodies of Life

Poppy: Fill The Crown

Diamond Head: Am I Evil?

Music Videos The Most  For You:

The Cranberries: Dreams

Poppy: Bleach Blond Baby

Pat Benetar: We Belong

Sneaker Pimps: 6 Underground

Legend: Loved By The Sun

Live: I Alone

Bjork: Human Nature

Black Sabbath: NIB

Samael: Rebellion

Sixpence None The Richer: Don’t Dream It’s Over

Enigma: The Child In Us

Sting: If I Ever Lose My Faith In You

Grimes: Player of Games

Melodies Of Life, Final Fantasy 9, Music Video

Enigma: Sadness

Madonna: Ray of Life

Poppy: Fill the Crown

Aqua: Good Morning Sunshine

The Police: Wrapped Around Your Finger

Mono: Life In Mono

Rihanna: Diamonds

Juliana Hatfield: Witches Song

Alison Krauss: When You Say Nothing At All

Love Spit Love: How Soon Is Now?

Madonna: Don’t Cry For Me Argentina

Jewel: Hands

Pretenders: Don’t Get Me Wrong

Queen: One Vision

Making A Satanic Video Game

I have covered it extensively in my book My Antichrist Game or Movie but will add some things to it here.

The setting has to be spooky. Whether it is undead spooky, evil spirit spooky, demons and hell spooky, or whatever else.

The plot is: that you are escaping hell, that you are half demon trying to become full demon, that the gates of hell have opened, that you are trying to open it, that you are serving Satan, that you are becoming the Antichrist.

The imagery is full of Satanic symbols and the demonic. It is always dark outside. The trees are twisted and spooky. That evil things are all around. There are lots of things like swamps, graveyards, demon infested cathedrals, and witch houses.

The music is semi-atonal. The gong, the pan flute, and the tubular bells are used to Satanic effect. You can have metal riffs and music if you want. The music is sort of goth like with organs and cellos playing dark things.

The characters and enemies are the darkest things you can imagine. Yet they are human enough looking to be related to the normal. The land is brutal. Hell is always trying to snatch you up. You get the power of hell. Worse and worse things emerge from it.

The “light” is always represented in the game but it holds no power against the hand of hell, which seems to over take it wherever it appears.

Some examples might help you, games like: Mortal Kombat, The Immortal, Drakhen, Dragon’s Revenge, Golden Axe, Final Fantasy in some instances, the darker elements of Zelda, Y’s 3: Wanderers From Y’s , Castlevania, Ghosts and Ghouls, Blood Stained: Ritual of the Night, Blasphemous, and Altered Beast.

Make a more evil version of anything else. Just like how Mortal Kombat came from Street Fighter.

You might make a social software for Satanists to use and gather through.

A Church that incorporates gaming into itself can be a powerful thing. It would draw in more. It could get things done apart from doctrine based things. It would have that to offer to both the world and its members. So with whatever goals you have towards creating a Church, I recommend it. A Church whose members are making video games have something better to offer. It would be more valuable than any scriptural book. It would be getting things done which pay off and serve as better recruitment material than a pamphlet would. It would bring more attention to the Church. A Church making (satanic) video games? If you need help I have a ton of it available. I have my video game making books and my new video game idea books under my name Adam Jeremy Capps. They include, currently: The New Game Makers Bible, The New Video Game Idea Book, Making a Great Video Game, All New Ideas For Video Game Things, Notebook of New Video Game Ideas, and My Antichrist Game or Movie. There will be more books to come, too. These books include never before used ideas by the troves and the philosophy of good game making. They are all free books and all in the public domain (the same goes for all of the books I have written.)

My Playlist For The Devil:

LEXX OST: Yo-A-Yo

Final Fantasy 7: Sephiroth’s Super Nova

Malcom Mclaren: About Her

The Police: Wrapped Around Your Finger

Madonna: Ray of Light

Rihanna: Diamonds

Smashing Pumpkins: Zero

Journey: Who’s Crying Now

Soundgarden: Black Hole Sun

The Cranberries: Dreams

Enya: Orinoco Flow

E Nomine: Mitternacht

American Pop (movie): Dishwasher Scene

My Favorite Sayings:

I once had a book called “Russian Proverbs.” Proverb books as such are hard to come by. They are the sort of books that you can meditate with. Any given sentence has deep meanings. I had a father that was always saying them. He is a wise man. Not nearly enough to make a book out of but here are some of my favorite ones:

Where there is a will there's a way

Out of sight, out of mind

Absence makes the heart grow fonder

Live by the sword die by the sword

Two heads are better than one

Kill two birds with one stone

Throw the baby out with the bath water

People in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones

When in Rome, do as the Romans

A stitch in time saves nine

Look for the silver lining in the clouds

One drop overfills the bucket

Fortune favors the bold

That which does not kill you makes you stronger

If you can’t beat them, join them

Let the ends justify the means

Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth

Curiosity killed the cat

Every dog has its day

The pot calling the kettle black

The world is your oyster

Better late than never

The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence

There’s no accounting for good taste

You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar

Anything worth doing is worth doing well

Laughter is the best medicine

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery

If it isn’t broke, don’t fix it

Let sleeping dogs sleep

Don’t count your chickens before they hatch

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush

You can lead a horse to the water but you cannot force it to drink

When it rains it pours

Laugh at one penny, cry at one penny

Buy it nice or buy it twice

Here are some found online:

A chain is only as strong as its weakest link

A fool and his money are soon parted

A friend in need is a friend indeed

A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step

A rising tide raises all boats

A rolling stone gathers no moss

Actions speaks louder than words

All roads lead to Rome

All's well that ends well

Any publicity is good publicity

Beggars can't be choosers

Better the Devil you know (than the Devil you do not)

Birds of a feather flock together

Count your blessings

Cowards may die several times before their death

Discretion is the better part of valor

Do not make a mountain out of a molehill

Do not put all of your eggs in one basket

Easy come easy go

Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die

Empty vessels make the most noise

Fake it till you make it

Familiarity breeds contempt

Give an inch and they will take a mile

Good fences make good neighbors

Haste makes waste

Hindsight is 20/20

If you play with fire, you will get burned

If you want a thing done well, do it yourself

The early bird gets the worm

The squeaky wheel gets the grease

Knowledge is power

Let bygones be bygones

Leave well enough alone

Misery loves company

Money does not grow on trees

Money makes the world go round

Never say never

No guts, no glory

No pain, no gain

No rest for the wicked

Nothing succeeds like success

Nothing ventured, nothing gained

One person’s trash is another’s treasure

Out of the frying pan and into the fire

Patience is a virtue

Respect is not given, it is earned

Rome was not built in one day

Seeing is believing

Slow and steady wins the race

Slow but sure

Strike while the iron is hot

Talk is cheap

The bigger they are, the harder they fall

The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree

The darkest hour is just before dawn

The die is cast

The last straw which broke the camel’s back

The pen is mightier than the sword

The proof is in the pudding

The road to hell is paved with good intentions

There are two sides to every question

There is no honor among thieves

There is more than one way to skin a cat

There is no time like the present

Time is a great healer

To each their own

To the victor goes the spoils

Up the creek without a paddle

Variety is the spice of life

Waste not, want not

Well begun is half done

What goes around, comes around

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade

When the cat's away, the mice will play

When the going gets tough, the tough get going

You cannot have a cake and eat it too

You cannot make an omelet without breaking some eggs

The Light, Dark, And Gray Side

The light side of a corporation is very giving. Makes certain things free, provides honest services to people. The light side of corporations is less greedy. They will try to keep all the employees they can over firing them. They will pursue philanthropic things and donate some of their income to donate to certain causes. They may be a non-profit altogether. They may be an entity created to help people. If their heart is in it then they will use that money well.

        The Darker Side of corporations are of ill gotten gains. They get their money from illegal means. That might be as bad as drugs or only as bad as a little gambling. The darker side of corporations get their money from other corporations. They do so by stealing from them. Then they sell what they steal on the black market. They are greedy companies. They only care about money and will do everything they can to get it. They may also be companies that create the Satanic, in whatever form.

The Gray Side of corporations might be a little strict but only to make employees better. They might have automated restaurants or something like that. While people can’t get a job there it makes prices cheaper for the customer. It is all a part of progress.  They have fair prices. They don’t spike prices but maintain a good price. They might be on the border of right and wrong but if they know what they are doing they can walk a fine line. It is like gambling in a legal way: win this, for example. It is like sugary cereal. It might be sugary but it is loaded with vitamins.

The Lighter Side of progress is that people are helped along the way. People find cures for all sorts of things. Life is made to last longer. People are healthier and happier. The homeless find homes. Crimes are reduced along the way. People get better and better things too, things that are only cheaper and cheaper to get at the same time. Life is made to have more meaning. There is more joy in it.

The Darker Side of progress is that our own technology can harm us, such as guns and other destructive devices. People lose their jobs as more machinery comes in to do all things. TV is great but people are sitting at it all day. Our own tech turns around to harm us. Monkeys and other animals are test subjects. We slaughter a million cows a day to serve our needs. Add to that countless poor chickens and fish. The world becomes a shopping place.

The Gray Side of progress is that eventually machinery will do all of our work. We have lost some purpose but at least we can start to find our own purpose. The gray side is that people are being helped, just not those who need it the most. Things need to continue forward however, one way or another, and eventually we will get to them. The gray side is in high prices but prices that are necessary for any given company to produce yet better things. Like medication which costs a great deal, whose money is used to make yet better medicine.

The Lighter Side of emotions are the happy ones. Those which are spiritually uplighting, hopeful, loving, caring, and understanding, are the lighter ones. Good emotions keep the door open, bad emotions are a thing of many closed doors. The Darker Side of emotions are the angry and harmful ones. The bitterness one gets, and holding a grudge, especially. It is found in the hearts of those who wish to take your things and view you as just another meaningless life on this earth. The Gray Side of emotions are non-emotions. That while you don’t feel good, truly happy, or bad, bitter with anger, you are at least stable. The gray side is the stable mind, one that has more “intellectual happiness” than emotional happiness. For many things that is the ideal state to be in. Just like the person screaming on the nine eleven call for help and is told to “calm down and speak clearly.”

        

        The Lighter Side of love is when you finally found it, after looking for so long. It is being with someone you enjoy being with. It is doing things like watching movies together. It is dates, those which were pleasant and a lot of fun. It is when the pleasure of it all is still at its best. The Darker Side of love is in those who are obsessed and might even stalk the person. They may even become murderous before it is all over. They call you endlessly throughout the day. There is no one you could detest more and wish to be rid of. For me, it is also about getting married, having kids, and losing all privacy and the choice to live your life alone and the way you want to. The Gray Side of love is that you are kind of bored with the person. You may even want a reprieve for a while. It is like the intermission in an opera. The start was really good. The break comes at just the right time. When it is over you have gathered yourself back together and can begin enjoying yourself again.

        The Lighter Side of growing up is your newfound joy of life, like a kitten at play. Everything is deeper for you, more immersive, and more enjoyed. You don’t have any real responsibilities. You try to do well in school but beyond that you have a home, not a job, with everything guaranteed by your parents: a home, clothing, food. You may have gone on trips and celebrated holidays, and hopefully you did. The Darker Side of growing up comes with bad parents. There are those that had a good life growing up and those who have not. Growing pains is a bad thing. That time when nature is telling you to leave the nest so you lash out at your parents, parents who may not understand. Among my siblings, that was more pronounced with me than with them. You have literal growing pains too, like I had in my knees at times. No medicine could fix it. You also get sick more and suffer more from it. As for me it was strep throat most of the time, and I was a kid who got the mumps. I cannot imagine how I got the mumps. The Gray Side of growing up is that things are more intense. We may eagerly wait for something, but “good things come to those who wait,” which is a way of saying that you either care about what you are about to get or do not. Christmas never came to me with good sleep the night before. Things like this make good things truly good and bad things truly bad.

The Lighter Side of power is that it is used to protect people. We have guaranteed the protection of both us and our loved ones. A person can have the dream of making a business without fear of it being looted, at least to an extent. Those in power may use our taxes to help those who really need it. People are kept safer in many ways. Roads are built. Things are made the best they can be through regulations. No one is so able to do us harm, cheat us, take advantage of us, ect. I like the idea of the mighty force behind our nation protecting our freedom. The Darker Side of power is from those who abuse it, obviously. They do cruel things to citizens, not helpful things. They often want to be worshiped, deified. They restrict freedom, even strictly and viciously. They imprison others over petty matters. They do horrible things. The Gray Side of power is neutrality. They are protected by other nations. It is also perhaps democracy as much as the government is absent, but their presence is their help and the people have the power. How much power is too much and how much power is not enough, that is a gray sided question. How much freedom is too much, and how much is not enough, is another one.

The Lighter Side of fame and wealth is that you now have all you need and that can be very stimulating in the beginning. You then have money to show off. You suddenly have enough money for a new home, even a really good one. You are at the start of something great and might feel quite blessed by it all. Now everyone is paying attention to you and you might even be known the world over. Whatever it is you make, you can know that it will be appreciated. The Darker side of fame and wealth is that people are always at your door. They follow you wherever you go. You cannot escape them. They hound you. Now there are people who want your money. They see a home such as yours and want in. You might have more money than you know what to do with. The Gray Side of them is that you are bored with spending money. You don’t know what to do with it. You feel you don’t really need it. You can escape sometimes, to the Bahamas, to get a break from the demanding public. You are not sure if your money will continue. Maybe you just had a bit of luck but luck that won’t last. So you must make sure you invest where you should, and hope that it all can last at least a little longer through those things. The in between would be that you were famous through and through but are in a period where no one cares. Then you do or create something that puts you into the spotlight again. It might even be a recurring theme for you. On the other hand there might be nothing you can do to get old fame and wealth back. You are a one hit wonder. But at least you had great things for a moment in time.

The Lighter Side of freedom is that people can fully express themselves without consequences. We can worship as we choose to. We can more liberally go about in life without fear that saying the wrong thing will imprison ourselves, or any other trivial thing. We can see true news over news manufactured by the government. We can enjoy the controversial, dark and wicked forms of entertainment. We can create the Satanic. We are more free to pursue our dreams. The Darker Side of freedom is that people abuse it. They falsely make themselves out to be victims in order to have power over others, such as their enemies who do not deserve to be their enemies, or authority figures. The Gray Side of freedom is that people can carry guns to protect themselves, but others can illegally get them and harm you with them. The Gray Side of freedom is we can create what we want, including things of bad influences. The Gray Side of freedom is we can say what we want, including ridiculing others.

The Lighter Side of relationships is that they really help you out. They might even help you move. They may provide you with a place to live while you are getting on your feet. They could be good company. You can drink and BBQ together. It’s good to have good friends. The Darker Side of relationships are the abusive. Those people who try to get you into bad things so they can take advantage of you. They try to find some gain off of you and some would never know any better. The Gray Side of relationships are those people who help you, if you would only be their friend. They bug you. They are needy in a lonely sense. But will give you the shirt off of your back if you asked for it. The Gray Side comes from people who are paid to help you. You don’t care for them on a personal level. They are just there to help you, and that is all there is to appreciate about them really.

The Lighter Side of religion is that it can spiritually improve lives. It is morality and philanthropy for a reason. It teaches right and wrong. It brings about self discipline. It makes people consider others. It brings about belonging. The Darker Side of religion is that there is too much “belonging,” belonging on a cult level. The cult leader is a perverted person sometimes, someone who would take all of your money, on false pretenses. Religion can also harm a person individually. It can make them suicidal. It can make them self-sacrificial. It might be a religion of great delusions to begin with. Cults themselves can lead to mass suicide or come to bear great arms. The Darker Side is there when religion enslaves you. The Gray Side of religion is when you take it seriously but not too seriously. It is when you walk the fine line of serving it and serving yourself in the right amounts. The Gray Side is that you can never be fully sure. You believe in your books but doubt lingers. Doubt about your after life, with some atheism that will not go away. As a result you can never be fully involved, if that applies to you. The Gray Side is that it doesn’t come free. Religions can be a very give and take kind of thing. It always requires at least a little work.

True Liberation

Liberation is Luciferian. I used to practice total loss of inhibition. I did the most daring things possible. I deeply cried while in public, more like sobbing than crying. That has always been enjoyable to me, not from depression. It came from self pity most of all. One time I went before a large crowd and sang “when you wish upon a star” as loudly as I could. I used to dance any time I heard a business play music, such as McDonnald’s with their own playlist of music. I would walk very childishly. I waved around my arms like I wanted to. I came up with fake accents which were both childish and demonic sounding. I would pretend I was playing limbo if I wanted. I was not afraid of doing anything at all in public. It was my form of being spiritually uplifted. It can even make for good therapy. To have someone see you doing whatsoever they will around you in a therapeutic setting. We are creatures of self repression. We are tightly kept together, especially as adults. I liken what I am saying to breaking the ropes that keep us bound.

        Liberation can also come from breaking away from the popular and customary. Whatever the rule of the day is, do not follow it. Keep yourself at a distance, always. Time and again people have come together to create a cult-like thing: the popular opinions and issues of the day, and if you are not careful they will capture you, too. “Go against the anti-flow.” There is so much more to enjoy in life than what they would hand you. Retreat into us or retreat into us of a different design, the design you and your loved ones would have.

        Let us block out the annoying noise they make. The noise that demands you be a certain way. There are people out there ever looking for those who do not conform to them and their ways. My advice is to blend in. “When in Rome do as the Romans.” Be a person for all people, as Paul said.

        There are some that would take away any chance you have at success. They are a poor lot that only have anything good through doing so. It isn’t their objective to be greater. It is to make others less greater. So they complain about capitalism. They make it look like equality but what it really is, is communism. While others waste away and come to nothing, just ignore that and continue to pursue your dreams. Have something that can defend you, that can prop you up, that can provide you, in darker times. It takes a bad person to not care about what others have, wanting it with envy, but entirely not able to work for it as you do. They may even think they should have it, why should you have it?

        Keep bad people out of your life. Do not be constricted into any group. Do not have a thing to be guided by. Instead, go your own way. Instead of wasting any time, look for and get the finer things in life. Keep them with you always. That is more valuable than any group. It is better to be lonely and have everything than to have the sort of company that would take everything from you. Don’t be misguided by their stupid little causes and their stupid little thoughts and ways. If they have brought nothing into your life then bring nothing into theirs. Time is much better spent making your future better.

        Maybe someday you can lift your arms and declare “free at last!” That is a day you have broken free from the ordinary world. A day when the best of things finally come together. Where through money you are independent. Where you have a life of greater significance. A day when you tower over others.

My Personal Prayers

My common prayers are for technology and science to develop in a way that helps the suffering and leads to a utopia. I pray for my protection. I pray my life will be preserved. I pray that my loved ones are protected, one and all, including you. I pray for fame. I pray for the success of my books. I pray for universal basic income to come about. I pray to be blessed with the unexpected. I pray to be a part of God’s Kingdom. I pray to always have my own place. I pray to never be confined again. I pray to never be harmed. I pray that I can keep my things. I pray for a psychic connection to the world. I pray against being the antichrist. I pray for the sake of my soul and eternal life. I pray to be left alone– not in entirety, but to be unbothered. I pray that nothing is ever stolen from me. I pray that I am never robbed. I pray to have good things, the things I have put into lists before. I pray to be a significant religious leader, the top of his kind. I pray for help on my worst days. I pray for my best future to play out. I pray for the best changes brought on through fame and not the worst ones. I pray for the success of my favorite things. I pray to be watched over and protected, kept from bad people, led into safety, with no harm making contact with me. If I love them, may they love me. If I do not like them, may they go elsewhere. If I can gain something, so let me. If something would be taken from me, do not let that be. If I can grow, let it be, and let me grow tall. If I can have a good day, let it be, if I can have a special day, let it be most special. If I could have a better life, then bring me to it.

Hales-Nema, So Noted In Memory (Amen.)

Preparing for the (Christian) Afterlife

The here and now is not a relevant thing in Christianity. The belief and faith is in the hereafter. Life on Earth itself is just a stepping stone. So the very purpose of forgiving and forgetting the transgressions of others is found. A Christian should right their wrongs, to atone. They should repent and remain good, moral people. A Christian faces self discipline all of their lives. It is a difficult religion. They should put all focus onto God and His Son, Jesus Christ. Read The Sermon on The Mount. It is packed with the most important things of Christian belief. Do not let the things of the Earth weigh heavy on you or keep you down. As Jesus said, your treasure is where your heart is, your heart should be in Heaven. If it serves you well, minimize the things you need, for that purpose. The most important things are love and charity. Help those who need it and your reward will not be lost. Give freely. Do not show off your good deeds, but keep them between you and God. These are some of the things that Jesus talked about. If a person hungers, feed them, if they thirst, give them water. Speak the gospel. Be a part of a Church. Grow with that Church. Be with your own. Do all you do in love, not judging others or harming anyone in any way. And know that God can return at any time, so be seen as doing good.

The World Is For The Satanist

The “wicked” will live in their own part of the world when God returns. God will rule in the Kingdom of Jerusalem/ Israel. On the outside, the iniquitous will dwell. The lion will eat with the sheep. Such people who would take from the tree of eternal life must correct their wrongs and be dressed in the dress of holy clothing before they can take from that fruit. That fruit of eternal life will be in God’s Kingdom. “There will be a new heaven and a new Earth.” “Heaven is in your midst.” The Kingdom of Heaven is in a place in space. Heaven with a capital letter means God’s Kingdom “up” there. The lowercase “heaven” just means outer space. God does not spill the beans. He did not have things put into the Bible that would prove it right. As the Bible says, “only faith pleases God,” and for a Christian with the gift of salvation from God, that is an important factor. Otherwise the love of Christians would be fake. The Kingdom of Heaven is a mighty place. It does not conform to the physics of space as we know it. It is a wonderful place that exists differently, as designed by God. You could call Earth the middle realm. I have described what hell is earlier in this book. The New Heaven on Earth is a place empowered by science and technology. It is one that has reached a utopia stage in all of it. When God and His angels (aliens) come, all of the missing pieces for that will be put into place. The name of Jesus must be put into the Church. That name is the name Lucifer. As the end of Revelations said, “I am the bright morning Star.” That carries the exact same meaning as the name Lucifer does. Jesus is found in all scripture. The Christians would deny it up and down but that includes the scripture about Satan. The entirety of the Old Testament is speaking about its own thing in one way, and Jesus on the other, always. In the meantime demonic spirits have been freed from the abyss. We can see people who have taken in those spirits everywhere. That is especially so in the most Satanic of nations, Satan’s Israel, which is the United States. We The People has always meant Satan’s People. It is his “New Earth.” It is the place on the Earth that produces the most Satanic of things, easily so. It is a sinful nation. It is the first nation to really drive out Christianity. Those demonic spirits have entered into the bodies of Americans more than anywhere else in the world. It kind of goes like a virus. We were blessed with Satanic forces to have a great military power behind us. Just as Jesus is coming to his kingdom, Satan is creating and coming into his own here (in the USA.) It can be seen of people, those with demonic spirits in them, with how they act. Even an atheist would believe that they were demon possessed. They always attribute it to drugs but it isn’t always because of drugs. We all know what a “Karen” is these days. Those are the kind of people I am speaking about. They trash entire restaurants and gas stations for not getting their way. They demand to speak to the manager or they call the police over trivial matters in which they are at fault. They get murderous too, killing many in the process. They liberally steal from stores, filling up whole bags. They are prone to road rage. They have no regard for life, for the possessions of other people, nor for civility. These are the people who will fare the worst during The Tribulation. They are Satan’s children just as childish as can be. They are premature births. They are people who grew up in a new Satanic age (or more like a new Satanic nation.) This world has made them greedy. It has made them selfish, hedonistic, with no spiritual qualities. It was like the water that grew weeds. If a Satanist is to do well then they must be mature. They must be discrete and keep themselves safe. They must avoid bad places and be prepared any way they can. They cannot allow themselves to act poorly. Those that can achieve these things will be a part of The Elite. It takes a Satanist to interpret The Bible that way. A Christian could never do so.

Satanic Living

Satanic living is about the love and joy of life. Why should they be considered wrong for loving life in the world over loving individuals as individuals? As long as we are not really harming anyone then that is good enough. In fact the cold and emotionless person can function quite well and serve the world well. Better than those whose emotions get in the way. For a Satanist being “good” means “treating others fairly.” Not showering them with love, but not with hate either. If they invade our places and take from us that is a different matter, and people choose their battles. Most of us just get by discreetly. We are not very talkative. Life is more about the things of the world and getting it. Not some waving of the hands around into empty places but to use them to grab good stuff. We find our own things to like throughout life. We get them, sometimes regularly, willing to pay whatever.

        Our treasure is here on Earth. We don’t find too many problems with life if anything at all. May Satan bless us with good things. May we get those things we want the most. May Satan protect his own. When we eat, let us enjoy every bite and truly taste our food. When a good time is going to come, let us eagerly await it. Once we have it, let us give every bit of appreciation for it. Let’s take nothing for granted.

        Let others squabble about their serious issues. Let the zombies grow and undo each other. Lets keep a distance from them. Let them war over serious issues and be guided that way. It is not literal zombies we must be careful of. We must be aware that these insane people could come right to our door and bother us and when that time comes may Satanic forces overpower them.

        The most important lesson in life is finding and getting the things you like the most. The most important matter is that you are happy. The most important thing is you have what you want and enjoy it. No other lessons in life mean anything. “Do well” is the only rule you need.

My Regret Has Gone Too Far!

A person is either going to grow up or grow down. If they grow up they have matured. If they grow down they have become criminals. Let us mature in life, so that we can live to be old and remain free. I have a lot of regrets about my youth. I said the worst of things to the best of people. I have done wrong at times and just ruined many relationships. I was once asked by a dying therapist if she was a good therapist. She had leukemia.. And I told her no. I had a stray cat I took in just to give it a better life. While I was homeless my friends insisted on taking care of it. They were offended that I was trying to put an ad in a newspaper about it. So I let them. A few days didn’t pass before their bull dog killed it. I was wanting to give the cat a better life but instead it met with a brutal end. I once broke up with a girlfriend telling her it was because she was too fat. She went to the only man she could, one who was 30 years older than her, whom she married. She later sort of whispered to me, in a sad way, he’s an old man. Maybe that is why I am cursed to not have any relationship. That has been the way I have wanted it for a long time now, however. I actually feel I have done well in life by not getting married and those things. I just feel guilty about the ways I have come about it.

        I am no sort of sociopathic person though. I care for others. I have intense empathy at times. I feel bad about my past. I have become the most polite of persons never wanting to anger anyone for any reason. I am carefully law abiding, will not even jaywalk (although San Francisco has legalized that this year.) and am paranoid over things like underpaying on accident. I have phobias like getting into trouble for bumping into someone. I am not bragging about these things. I know I do not need to live with such concerns. But I am just telling you the way that I am. It is a thing I seek to improve. My new year's resolution was “to not worry so much.” I have gotten better, and am worrying less. But then I went to do my lab work last week and every time I do I worry that if I am not nice enough they will sabotage my bloodwork, throwing the blood away or something. I worry that my mail will not be delivered to me but stolen or deliberately misplaced. The guy that works at the desk who puts the mail away told me I didn’t have any packages after I asked for it. I knew I had something come in according to the tracking. He lied and said I didn’t get anything and after he saw me down about it he said “I was just kidding!” I am too afraid to fight. I fear I would be jailed for assault or something. I do not put in complaints except for the worst of things. Am always trying to stay on good terms with others.

        We have things set up in this place where people come in to inspect our rooms for mice and bugs. I bend over backwards to clean it before them so they will leave me alone. They say it needs cleaning anyway. The way they do cleaning is the bad part, the bad part of that is that it lasts from 9- 5 ) eight damn hours! They look at it and compliment me for working on it. They say they will just be here for a couple of hours. Then when I come back they say it isn’t over until 5 PM, so they lied to me. So why should I clean at all even when I am able to and it is a good habit of mine? I told myself I would save enough money to go out to eat and see a movie while they are doing their nonsense. But instead I placed a sign on the door like my neighbor does, which says “skip me.” After doing that there was a loud tap on my door and they left. Just one tap, but they didn't come in. They are given keys for all of this too.

        I am complaining about the bad side of these things but what is the good side to it? The good side to it is that I will never go to jail unless it is a total misdemeanor. I don’t get into fights. I walk away from them. I don’t act in ways that provide any justification to take things too far against me. I am much less angry. I am not a person of self pity even if I made myself look that way. I do not soak in “done wrong” feelings. I rather return to my happier things in my locked up room that none may enter. I have gotten over a lot of my worries. If I can do that some I can do that more. I have hope. I rest on hope. I rest on the fact I can fix problems if they do occur. And the worst just never happens and I know that.

        I stay out of trouble. If I have to have someone help me when someone else is doing bad things to me then I will. I won’t say any sort of thing such as “I am going to complain about you,” or God forbid tell them I am going to call the police. I just do those things without announcing them. Most importantly I am just someone that needs to become comfortable in my own skin. I came from awful places.. Homeless, in jail, and years in group homes and a boarding care with hateful staff. It is just a recent thing of mine to have my own place. To be free at last. To have good things. I am just worried at this time in my life that things will go wrong. That I will lose everything. Things like that.

Making the Weekend Good

Maybe Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. Maybe some other two or three days. It is a time when you can have a different routine, if you want to put it that way. I mean is drinking alcohol a “routine”? Some like to BBQ at that time. Some like to watch a movie, maybe go to the theater, or a restaurant. Some just may follow their mother to the grocery store and be in the toy aisle. I used to do that and got a toy or rented a video game. Then later I spent my allowance at whatever store we went to on a Friday. Some like to party. Some like to hold parties. Others like to date. Some use that time to creatively work or do a hobby instead of job based work. Some just take that time to read. Some play video games all weekend long. Some rest more than normal on the weekend. Whatever it is you do, it is meant to be a nice time. A time that stands out above the rest. I remember the first time I stayed awake until 3 AM. It was on a Friday. I was just a little kid. My brother could not stay awake. They used to play things like the Heavy Metal cartoon movie, the old Hobbit cartoon too, in the middle of the night. Regular TV just doesn’t do that anymore. My best weekend memories come from playing Final Fantasy 2 & 3 all weekend long. One thing is for sure, I dreaded Sunday night when I knew it was about to be all over. I got highly excited when the school bell rang on Friday and school was done for the weekend.

The Habit of Doing Better And Better Will Take You Far

That is evolution and personal progress, after all. I talk a lot about becoming better because it is a Luciferian thing. First get better and better about doing something to begin with. Be good at a set regular amount. Once you are comfortable, step outside of your comfort level and do more. Then get comfortable with that. Just do not stress yourself out too much. For me that means writing books that go further than 100 pages. For another it might be writing 10 pages a day instead of 5. It is to do more than before and become better than before. Have a spirit of competition all the while. Have someone to do better than. That is with whoever the heroes are of your field. Every field has one. You must strive to outdo them. To become better than them. It is very motivating.

        It doesn’t only apply to that sort of thing though. You can also evolve the things you own. That simply means replacing old and lesser things with new and better things. That ranges from something as small as a fan to something as large as a new TV. With everything in between, down to the pens you use and the clock on your wall. The best place to start is for those things you use the most and the things most deserving of some better version. It's like replacing your paperbacks with hard covers and adding a coffee grinder to your coffee drinking.

        It is also about making your life better than before. That means bringing new things in it. Which might mean trying new things, finding a new favorite drink, taking a chance on a movie you think you might like. Starting a hobby that is sure to stick with you. It could be to take the first step in creating something you wanted to. It can even be a new set of clothes which make you feel like a million bucks. Then there is the venture into education and a better job from it. Going to college and doing well there can make major changes to your life. Maybe you just want to start reading. Maybe there is a thing you once enjoyed that you can get back into. Sometimes we have to push ourselves into or back into such things.

        It is an objective in some cases to be above your competition. You want to do more than most, at least. Understand your competition. Know from the start what that is like. Is everyone already doing it too? Is it a common thing people are trying to succeed with? Can you do better than them, enough to be more popular among them? Or is it hopeless? The best things to get into are the most difficult. The competition there is low and fewer are doing them. Some of those might be in high demand for that and other reasons. Like the reason they are just talents in high demand. In all cases avoid the easy routes. The more difficult ones are more worthy of you.

Not Being Too Cynical

I detest commercials. I even detest a lot of music. I am cynical. If I wasn’t then I would have a lot more to enjoy. Then again funny commercials used to sell me right away, making me hilariously buy their product. What does buying this or that have to do with humor? Yet I would laugh myself right into buying it. I was still listening to new music up until about ten years ago. I thought I would be different from older people. That I would continue liking new music. But no, I am just like the rest, still stuck in my generation. I actually am ignorant of what is going on in music currently. I cannot name one new hit song. I can’t name a lot of new movies either. Seems as though I have slipped away from the world in those ways.

        

The Satanic Version Of..

Prayer: We pray in a greedy way. We do not pray as though a strict being is listening, one that must be given the utmost respect. Rather we pray to a being who wants us to be greedy, childish, and with adoration, but not solemnly.

Church: If a Satanic Church is to be made right it must not be fashioned after Christian Churches. It is not a Christian Church. It must be based on things of Satanic attributes. Worldliness, pleasure, hedonistic settings, revelry, idol worship, the profane, ect.

Sin: I would provide a simple definition of “things that get you into trouble” as being sin. That means that if it will not get you into trouble then why not do it, if you want to in the first place.

Morality: Morality is just good manners. It is giving everyone at least a little respect. It is building up the relationships you want. It is about being treated freely and being good towards others. Do not do an evil thing.

After Life: We either deny it or believe in it and not much could change that. I tell you though that Satan will have his Kingdom on Earth as I have illustrated before. There is a greatness to the universe that the sensible person would regard as created. So elegantly created. We do not slip into oblivion.

Creativity: Perhaps we create as individualists. As Luciferian that is only natural. We are people of our own kind. We are not “sheepishly.” Our things should stand out. Our creations should come uniquely, as unique as we are. If we have the liberty to create, then the Satanic is liberally made. At the same time, we seek to be better than everyone else. To be at the top within what we do.

Life: Life is a worldly thing for us. It is The Devil’s world we live in. We dwell somewhere between heaven and hell currently. It is about the good life, as good as it can be. Before our lives many treasures are found, and that is true more than ever before. Life is about enjoying life and nothing more needs to be said.

Relationships: We prefer a more productive sort of relationship with people. With such we may gain and create great things. We should have the respect not to take things from people or even ask for them. Many of us are non relationship types, of which I am one. I prefer being alone. That isn’t true with all of us however.

Entertainment: We are masters at creating it. The Christian produced things cannot hold a candle to what we make. That brilliance has been shown in the last 50 years. More than that. People love what we make. The Satanic grows strong and fast and outdoes any Christian thing. Music was made for Lucifer. He is a master at it.

Religion: Some of us are atheists, some of us are Devil worshipers, then there is me: a Christian Satanist. Try as any one might, there has never been a monopoly over Satanism. It goes where it wants to and people use it the way they want to. That is the way it should be. Anyone who declares a monopoly over religion runs a cult. Things are not so black and white as that and better people will not do as they are told. Religion is free.

Sin Is Foolishness

One foul mistake can cost your life or your freedom. I have seen on the news that an agitated person was trying to get off the bus. There was an old man in front of her. And in an instant she lost her freedom and would be charged with murder. Why? Because she shoved the old man forward and he later died in the hospital. You know what? She probably went home and forgot all about it. She probably had no idea at all that the police would soon come and arrest her for murder. She was, however, and has a lifetime in prison to regret that little moment in time.

        People sometimes set themselves up for arrest. They cause a ruckus thinking ‘I am within my rights,’ the “as long as the knife or gun is pointed downward” sort of thing. So they bring a bat into a store or some dumb thing. They harass the employees. They outright reject any belief in “no trespassing” laws as though it does not apply to them. Like something being unconstitutional or something. They have the right to harass and threaten things. They feel they are the victims in the matter. They are willing to lie. So they call the police, when they get there they find them yelling, and they get arrested instead.

        Why do some people do evil to begin with? Well, if they spend every dime on drugs and run out of money, they are perfectly willing to burglarize or rob someone so they can get high again. They aren’t concerned about being arrested later. They are just desperate to get high again. They live in a sort of do all atmosphere. Their days are spent in one room and another room, one place, a different place, with friends doing the same. They live a life of being high and have sometimes lost touch with reality altogether. Some were abused by their parents. It is all they know. Any discipline that the legal system would bring them was not as bad as what their father put them through. For as long as they get away with what they do they will do it more and more until they are caught. How is one more time going to hurt anything? They probably know they are doomed to begin with.

        We have to be on guard against such people. As for me, I will not leave my house or stay out past 4 PM. I do not go to strange vacant areas. I let go of the things people say, like when I am on the bus. For all I know it might be a murderer who is saying it to me or they are in a group ready and willing to hurt me. If I am smoking and someone out in town asks for one from me, then I give them one. I wouldn’t do that for anyone I personally know but for these street strangers I do, not knowing exactly who they are. I stay alone. Staying alone will get you far. A group will push you into drugs, prostitution, and other things. I have denied drugs from others a number of times. At times that was met with anger. Once while homeless me and a few guys I only knew for a short time got into a fancy car. Seems like they were going to buy us some stuff before I got out of the car feeling like I was about to be “used.” People think that whoredom is only for women but no, there are also lots of transvestite prostitutes and that sort of thing. Whores for gay men. There have been a number of times when I just walked away from trouble. Once in Arizona I was at a house party. Outside a guy started talking to me telling me to go into some guy’s house (to basically break in) and steal some steaks from his refrigerator. The Devil was with me on that night. He was why I could flee. I think I was protected by God and Satan all my life. I used to get very lonely when I was 13. My father was a trucker and gone for days at a time. So I would wander around. This was in Arizona. One day down a dirt road in a small neighborhood this van was slowly driving behind me. So I went right up to someone’s door and told them there was a van following me. I didn’t stay there long. They didn’t believe me. Fortunately when I went back outside the van was gone. Horrible, horrible, horrible things..

        Being discreet is also important. It will keep you safe. You can either be silent in certain places or speak and be seen. You never know if you may say the wrong thing. Sometimes saying anything is the wrong thing. Some times when a person says something to you and you say anything at all back then they will lash out on you. Then there is the more obvious matter of what you carry around. I mean you don’t want to carry a large flat screen TV home walking down the sidewalk with it. I have some valuable gold rings that I would like to show off, but don’t. It also means being generic. I love being generic. To have such simple answers and so little to ever say.

        Then there are those that ridicule the police and only make things worse for themselves. The first time I was confronted by the police my father told me “just agree with everything they say.” Which probably saved me. I mean, if you anger them, they are going to respond in kind. I can see why fighting for your rights is good. If you really did something wrong though then going into a tirade about it will just add charges to you, maybe causing your arrest when you would not have been otherwise. People normally talk a lot to the police. They pour their souls out and feel like they have to express things in precisely the right way. But it is best to be generic, only answering questions given to you and letting them fill in the rest. Just don’t threaten to call the police on someone. Just do it. Don’t threaten to make up a complaint. Just make it. “Snitching” can cause a lot of retaliation against you.

        I am all for bad people getting what they deserve. I am all for a gas station employee to turn the tables on his robber.. With his own gun. I am certainly all for a woman shooting an intruder in her home. They go in thinking that they will take everything in such a tough way not knowing that it will cost them their lives. Not an hour passes before they meet their end due to it. And that is just hilarious. How deserving. What sardonic laughter. American society currently needs much tougher laws and it is either that or anarchy. It is either anarchy or a police state. It is either a police state or martial law. It is either martial law or a dictator. We live in troubling times. It is a prayer to add to my prayers: let there be tougher laws.

Broken Relationships

Maybe she doesn’t want you to fix it. Maybe she wants to fix it herself. So as much as you are trying to fix it yourself, maybe you should put it into her hands and see what happens. That means letting her be alone to think about it. That means to make her thoughts of you come freely, instead of forced. It means to not text again and again, or until she is ready to talk to you.

        If you do not love someone however, no matter what, that is your right. In fact it is better to be sincere. Sometimes we have to strongly tell such a person no. If we do not or let any lingering possibility of being with them remain, then we may create a stalker out of it. Some make stalkers in fact. The kind that wants their partner to grovel over them, that is in fact a common thing in relationships. Not until the thousandth denial do they finally let up and say “yes.” It is like submerging them in water and giving them breath at just the right moment, when they need it the most.

        As for me I am a sheer asshole when it comes to relationships and it is better I not get into them at all. I am a very jealous person. I am very controlling. I quickly lose my satisfaction. I find myself wanting to be alone again. Which is fine, because I don’t like dating. I don’t like having other people in my room or home. I don’t want to ever be married with kids. I want my time to remain my own. Relationships for me are more like a divorce from myself.

        If I don’t want someone in my life then they will not be in my life. That is all there is to it. Especially given that the life I made I made for myself. I left New Mexico behind. I did what no other in my family did, moving to San Francisco. I came here homeless and stayed that way for a year. I built up my life to what it is today. So I take the choice of who is in and who is out. My biological father wanted to be in my life, and would always say things like “his home is my home.” The last time I was there I had to go to a mental hospital. I took some cutting shears (serious scissors) and ripped it across my veins. I went to the mental hospital over it. When I returned home, I found I was kicked out of my room. They must have said something like “let’s throw out all of his things while he is away.” So I moved into the living room. He said over and again that it was my last month there. I was kicked out and wound up in the cheapest hotel in the city (of Albuquerque.) while my funds were quickly depleted. I got some nice new clothes out of it and went off to be homeless after I had to be. To get into the hotel I had to get an ID. Fortunately the hotel took my letter from the DMV that one would be coming in my mail (proof enough.) It was cold as hell at the time. I decided to take the bus to California and decided on San Francisco. It was something I had thought a lot about. Where I wanted to move was New York City. It was even colder than Albuquerque though. So again, I was homeless for a year. I wound up in jail. I wound up in the State Hospital for two years. In jail I had that ID mailed to me by my (biological) father but had to sign a paper having it returned to him. It was made of plastic, something I couldn’t have. So as much as this life is my own, as much as he set up my homelessness, he will absolutely not be in my life.

        I was in group homes for a while. The first was transitory. Some transition to their own places. I went to a longer lasting group home (6 months.) I think it was 9 months however. You can stretch it out while they are placing you somewhere new. I went into a boarding-care home. I thought that would be permanent. It closed down altogether though. Maybe the owners just wanted to sell their home valued at millions of dollars. Naturally it was a large home, with around 20 residents. Whatever the reason, I am glad it happened. The staff there were bossy in a hateful way. So I went back to that second 6-9 month group home I was in. Afterward I finally got into a hotel room. My conservator helped me into one. When I had a conservator. It was the last thing she wanted to do for me.

My point is that I was around people constantly. All the time. Even in my room. Outside, inside, every time I wanted to cook, there were numbers of people all around. We went on mandatory outings with each other. In the morning we went to group therapy together. I think that is why I like being alone so much. I don’t even talk to myself. I don’t care at all to talk to anyone and am kind of annoyed by those who do. It is like my neighbor, the guy right across from my room. He said that some people here treat this place like a party. “But it isn’t,” he said. “It is our home.” He said that he didn’t like me for “being good,” that he didn’t like me for what I do, but that he likes me for “what I don’t do.” And that means not bothering him with talk and things like that.

The Kind of People I Esteem The Most

I like the person who has found a lifetime talent. Those sorts of people that were perhaps handed down the tricks of the trade from their parents. Those that make the best hand made products in the best way. They do things that took them all of their lives to master. I like productive people as well. People that have good honest jobs they work hard at.

        I admire people in the upper class, but only when they get themselves there themselves over things like winning their money or getting it from their parents. Among them I probably like people who created great corporations the most and things like song writers the least. In any case if they got their money with criminal means I do not like them in any way. They are people in high places. They have such wonderful homes. They are mostly free with their time. Time to eat well and live well. I envy that. I envy the sort of life that comes with wealth. If they are smart people, people who perhaps revolutionized things, then all the better.

        I like certain celebrities. People like Arnold Schwarzenegger, and the talent of Gary Oldman to perfectly portray his role (a celebrity that is under-appreciated too.) I like my own kind: authors. I like Mike Tyson. I feel he has become a genuinely good person. I like Shigeru Miyamoto, the game making genius that he is. I might like a person’s movies but do not care about them in a personal way. Tim Curry always makes for a great character. The late Peter Stelle of Type O Negative was an interesting person. I like the 49ers NFL team.

        I like people who keep to themselves. I like those without a lot to say. People who are not into drugs. The nerdy kind perhaps, the gamer. I like the retro gaming community. I have my certain YouTube channels I like to watch and get subscription videos from. I await the day they typically post. Sometimes it is about speed running feats. Sometimes it is just reviews or history or something else. It is a widely varied thing. I like to hear their opinions and see what kind of videos they will make next. For some it is even their job. I don’t want anything to do with an alcoholic. I could tolerate a person high on crack more than I could with an alcoholic. They are irritable and unruly.

        I like people who have gotten a good education. Those that take their lives seriously. Not the criminally minded but the responsible kind that works for a better future and raises the best kids they can. I like the inventor kind. The kind of person that experiments with electronics and electricity. They spend their time alone researching and giving good things to the world through their accomplishments. Alone with productivity is a double whammy.

        I like and appreciate scientists. I like philanthropists. I like those who genuinely care about others.

The Kind of People I Dislike The Most

Rude people for sure. Those that cannot go about without saying hateful things. People who have no respect. Those that are always getting into fights over dumb things. Those that cannot hold their tongues.

        Criminals: people who sell drugs. Pimps. Thieves. The abusive, the aggressive, the murderers, those that rape and plunder, whatever it is, if they are a stain on this world then I am at a distance waiting for their condemnation to come.

        Needy people. Those who would force their way into being your friend. Those that cannot stand being alone. They want to be your gamer friend or something. Whatever social need they want you for: because I don’t need it.

        Children and animals. Don’t get me wrong, but I don’t like them around. I am a “seen and not heard” kind of person. As for something like dogs, they bark a lot and get in your way, crap everywhere, and you have to walk around them. Children can be annoying towards me too.

        People who lie. Who hides dirty secrets and you can kind of tell so. Those that sexualize things. I do not like for things to be sexualized. I also don’t like hearing things like a fart sound wet. I don’t like filthy mouths.

        I don’t like those that think they know what is best for me. Those that are always full of advice and would like to control my life in some way. I certainly do not like bossy people. Those that say I am not doing something well enough and snap at me over it.

        I don’t like closed minded people. I like people to have an open mind. Not those who would dispense with everything I say and count me out. I don’t like argumentative people.

        I don’t like people who smell bad. No one does. This nonsense of “pheromones” and sexual attraction towards body odor is untrue. Even a little of it makes me vomit. When such a person walks into a room, everyone is pointing and holding their nose waiting out. That is the very opposite of attraction. It repels.

        I don’t like the untrustworthy. I do not like people who would back stab me. I don’t like those who would break my hope. I don’t like those who would ridicule my dreams. I don’t like those that would abuse and use me in any way.

        I don’t like beggars. I don’t like hustlers. I do not like anyone who would take the most from me or the least from me. I don’t like those that live their lives sharing a wallet. One day they give something to you and the next they take something from you, as it has become your responsibility.

        I don’t like anyone who has an agenda they would incorporate me into. I don’t like anyone who would involve me in their group. I don’t like the group mindset. I cannot fully appreciate anyone who cannot think for themself. That is especially so with people of propaganda, whatever that propaganda is.

Be Aware, A Lot of Scripture Relates To The Gray Side

It would seem to purposefully allude to it. You don’t even know it is so until you are given some examples. Here are some examples:

You will know both good and evil

You cannot serve both God and Mammon

Lucifer means the bright morning star

The Devil masquerades as an angel of light

God said if you are lukewarm He will spit you out

The Devil finds another way in

Evil standing in the place it should not be

Antichrist = replacement of Christ

Has horns like a lamb but speaks as a dragon

Satan cannot cast out Satan

Maybe Christian Satanism is an Antichrist philosophy. Maybe not. If Christianity was ever a powerful thing, then maybe Christian Satanism might be too. I call it the Final Denomination. There may be denominations coming after it, but it is the end of the road. I sometimes have doubts in my own beliefs. Sometimes it occurs to me that I may be creating something totally evil. I am not a bad person at heart. Then there is the saying “the road to hell is paved with good intentions.” Maybe I am damned. Maybe I was wrong or even greatly wrong. Honestly, I have come to the point where I don’t think about it. I believe that what I have made is a good thing. That it is a good example, a good influence on people. God’s wisdom remains the greatest. Nothing can outdo Christianity and its making.

I have made a different thing. I have made a different people for God, not for myself. I have provided a different kind of person with different things to say and with a different way to act towards God. He may either appreciate it or hate it, but I have offered up just that to Him.

Naturally, people are going to hate me for being both. For them it is a side, to be “of” one or to be “of” the other. A part of their making is being against the other side. Aren't they then made on the other side? It could be said that The Devil wrote the Bible. Were it not for the events in Genesis then the Bible would not have come about and Jesus would never have been.. Not as he would have become, anyway, with such a people that worships as they do.

There’s A Machine (And Tools) For You

If you want to spend money to make money, machines help a lot. If you want to make any given thing, machines and tools make it easier. It could be as minor as printing out stickers or as difficult as large scale carpentry. For the tailor there are sewing machines. If they want to they can print designs on them. They could take rugged old clothes and make them better, or buy fine material, or work with leather if they ever want to. If you want to make action figures there are 3D printers and epoxy. If you want to make miniature figures there are 3D printers, epoxy, clay, glass, and woodcarvers to use. In some cases a thermal printer can save you money. It is a cheap way to make black and white stickers. I use it to create address labels. If you want to, you can make video games using a game engine. Then there are hack and game mods that some people create. Some prefer to work on old consoles like with a new set of caps and a soldering iron. That doesn’t look too difficult if you are doing it in a copycat way. That is especially so if all you are doing is one brief thing like putting a new 72 pin connector into an old NES console. For some it is more complex, such as putting a back lit screen into an old GameBoy.

        Have I gone over one you may want to do yet? Some like to work on cars. You may bring together a group of people to create a certain thing, something that after you have a supply of that you sell and hope it sells well. That goes with just about anything you can make and the important thing is that there is a demand for it and it is a good choice. You might buy a van and sell food or ice cream from it. You might instead pull a cart around. I don’t recommend that however. Unfortunately people get robbed that way. You could sell hot dogs or whatever. You can have cold drinks where people need them.

        If you are a writer you can buy a good computer or laptop with a word processor. You don’t at all need a powerful one in fact, not for that. There are ways to save you data, those things to buy. You might want a good keyboard along with it. The artist has a lot of choices. Maybe the most universal is a canvas but then again some people prefer to do digital art. You can use either oil paint or acrylic. Water colors, pastels, too. I once did some art on a dry erase board. When I was done with the image I painted over it. If your thing is music then a musical keyboard is a good thing to buy, if only to work out the melodies. I may be getting back into writing music myself. I got a small kids keyboard basically, a 37 key keyboard. I only need it to work out the melodies. I have some notation paper coming in soon as well. There is notation softwares to get. They let you know exactly what your music sounds like. If you at least know harmony well then you can put together symphonic stuff with them. You can make digital music files out of them.

        Woodworking calls for the tools it does. Some of them are more universal than others. A saw, a hammer. I would rather go over just how personalized it can be. You can make cabinets with glass doors. You can make corner cabinets or bookshelves: people like them. You can choose what wood you want. If you choose an expensive wood then all the better for its value. Some of it is very easy yet are things people often need, like bookshelves. There are tables: of lesser and greater wood, using glass, marble, whatever you want. I just recommend making it stylish so long as it doesn’t come across as too strange. You want neat, not ugly. There are people that improve their homes too. They may add a wood shack to their backyard, another room, my parents had their garage turned into a new room (a large one at that, the room for them.) My grandma added an eating area outside her house. All the family gathered there during holidays and the wide room was needed. The same carpenter did the same two.

        Some take scrap metal and turn them into bars. I have seen a few videos of that online. The guy just gets junk metal and makes bar after bar of it. Whether it is copper or iron, naturally he didn’t have something as valuable as gold. He did make some silver bars however. He had a “crucible” where the solid metal went into a furnace. He heated it up until melted and poured it into the mold. Looks entirely dangerous to me, but fun to watch. With all the metal thrown away and everything I can see it being lucrative.

        There are people whose tools mean everything to them. They may be used to pull off a complicated task or used to do more ordinary things, but the more they use them and learn from them the better. Their money and livelihood depends on those tools. There are people in groups doing their own thing and contributing in their own ways, hopefully ways they are good at. People still appreciate retro gaming. As such small groups or even individuals can still make video games. A lot of businesses started in a garage and things like that. One does his or her job and the other does theirs. They either float or sink. If they sink they part their ways and do something else. If they float they may succeed so much that they must expand, and so many strong companies started that way. Where one gas station became many, where a few computers sold becomes many, when just the right team was put together and had a good plan, you find success.

        

Keeping Things Together Against The Reckless

It can be called a large and bad smelling mess that some people have put the world into. We do not need a “compassionate” leader. We don’t need an empathetic/ emotional one. The type of people that frivolously spend tax dollars on things “in the name of good” are those whose pride comes at our cost. Neither do we need an angry leader. We need leaders that deal with criminals in a strict way. We need tougher laws. There are a type of people, many of them exist, that would ruin things for everyone else. They ruin things for good people while they infest every area with their own kind. They must be put to a stop. Made to halt. Made to suffer under their own bad choices.

        People are carrying around and enforcing ideologies on others and if others do not comply with it all then can very well be attacked. Some want to be the ones enforcing the law. They carry guns into places. They go about in a heroic sense defending store keepers. With how much the police have been crippled something had to fill the vacuum. Those things however are a bad sign. They are just an element of anarchy. Rulers are never done away with even under anarchy. Those rulers however are the worst kind. Our constitution had things so well laid out. Those that would rule over us were made unable to strip us of rights. For most part they haven’t. But the ones who adore anarchy have dreams of power and proceed in harmful paranoid ways.

        They see a great big world with a great deal of good things and want to unrightfully take it. Advertising, fast food “honed to perfection,” the riches that can be, what it can get, the forbidden allure of the criminal, through movies and games, drugs, hedonism, has made a horrible Frankenstien. It takes a strong mind for anyone to have not come one themselves. It takes an individualist who rejects bad influences. It takes a Luciferian. It takes a Luciferian to make things better. It takes Satan, God’s instrument. It requires a power as great as that. Tougher laws are needed. It takes time, it takes maturity. We are in a Satanic time, one newly formed. In our time there is Satan’s newborn generation. They are spoiled and uncertain. Their growth however is the growth of a great age. That age will lead into the Satanic Renaissance.

        First, things must “ de-convulate .” The Christians have congregated enough and made love for all hate for all. Good causes are a main problem among the things that have become convoluted. Things become convoluted over time. Things exacerbate. A little budget becomes a great budget and a great burden. Over time all things are expected to perfectly be helped with. No one is expected to get by on their own. Strength becomes a silly word. If you are weak you will get by the best in such a world. Regulations begin to hinder everyone. Propaganda absolutely does not know when to shut up, such as against smoking or things as trivial as sugar. People complain there are a few bumps in the road. Here is a great construction team that cost untold sums of money. People will greedily take as much as they can and yet expect more.

        Social norms become cult-like with cult-like principles, guidelines, rules, ideologies, terminology, and all else, until it just sort of blows up. Until it falls down under its own weight. Until it becomes simply detestable, intolerable, a thing everyone wants to free themselves from. They create the forbidden (anything against them) and the new rebel of the day is born, those against them. So again, for things to get better, it will take time. First the path to destruction (the collapse of the gathered convolution) then chaos (a new start) until an all new path is made.

        In the meantime we have science and tech to help us along. Just one major scientific advancement can improve things a great deal, in fact. That might be something anti-crime, things that make everything else cheaper, cheaper energy for all, and other things that improve our livelihood. As a result, people are happier, safer, housed, have what they need, and do not need to take it from others.

Pain

When I am unmedicated I cannot sleep. I remain sleepless for as long as I am. I seriously say, I do not sleep while unmedicated. My thoughts get in the way. I have the sort of Schizophrenic thinking that keeps me awake, mostly repeating the same thing in my mind, endlessly, keeps me from being able to sleep. One night while homeless I was locked into the thought of an African man eating a fruit bat, raw. It was disgusting to him, I could see things through his eyes. That same thought persisted for hours as though I was lost in time. It was scary. When I came out of it I ran, fell to my knees, and felt like death was right over me. There was a metalic black chair where I fell. I sat down on it, with my head bowed, until I was able to put myself back together (as much as a Schizophrenic person is able to.)

        I used to love visiting my family more than anything and waiting for them to pick me up (they lived 10 miles away) was hard on me. Waiting for Christmas day was hard on me. I could not sleep, cursing God about it. When I was young I knew that the sooner I fell asleep the faster I would get to Christmas day. My early days of stopping my medication are excruciating. I used to throw my self onto the ground basically wanthing to kill myself into sleep, if that makes sense. I would tumble in my bed utterly unable to sleep. I would throw myself around in bed, moaning. I tell you I have had great suffering in my life. I feel better about this new treatment for Schizophrenia: a twice a year shot. I would love nothing more than a permanent cure. I would take a ten year cure. I would take a five year cure: like getting a new ID and my five year shot on that day.

        I once sprayed bear mace in my room. I was wanting to buy a weapon mace: a staff with a ball with spikes, but that came up in a search. Thank God I didn’t use it on anyone. I thought it would work well at killing bugs and things in my room so I sprayed it in my room. In my closed door room. That hit me like a ton of bricks. I had to flush my eyes with water. The only thing that saved me was running in place, vigorously, and producing a lot of sweat. I used to wake up with bad back aches. No matter how much I squirmed I could not fix it. Then I found just the right yoga-like posture to fix it. It was an upside down backwards L. One where my back was bent forward and my arms were stretched out. Works every time. That and sodium naproxen. The name brand for that kind of pill is called Aleve. That also helped me with a toothache. I haven’t had a toothache in ages but when I did, it was miserable. In fact pain isn’t understood by anyone who does not have it. But when you have even a little of it it can ruin your day. Anyways, I went with the pain. I gargled salt water, peroxide, and vigorously brushed my teeth. That was adding pain to it all but within a few days the pain went away and hasn’t come back in ten years.

        As a much more drastic thing, I used to be a “cutter.” Not the scratcher kind either. I took a very sharp blade to my wrist once and scissors to it another time. I had to be stitched up in both cases. The second time the doctor told me I nearly lost function in my hands. Fortunately I have not been suicidal in a very long time.

        There was a night I was praying to God for an “erroneous” divorce. I was homeless at the time. Three days later I was in a parking lot wandering around and I spat on someone. A little longer forward some bicycle police came right upon me and hit me in the head. Maybe it was just a shove or something, I don’t really remember. I dropped my portable radio. I moaned “my radio is broken.” They had me wipe my face, which had blood on it, told me not to do it again, and left. But I landed on my ring finger (to get back to the whole divorce thing.) It not only broke, it compacted. Now it is permanently bent downward. I at least bought a gold ring for it. Quite a costly ring too, an 18 K gold ring.

        

Memory Games

There was a time that the only things I wanted to remember were video game based. That includes in game elements and the game itself, games I forgot. They were important to me because I was in places and circumstances that I could not have them. Not knowing any better I asked my doctors/ nurses in mental hospitals to give me a GBA and Final Fantasy 6 for my therapy. It kind of went along the same lines as how I asked for a 1.5 MG dose of Zyprexa, an oddball dose that never was, surprised by them giving me a regular dose (10 MG.) Anyways, in remembering these things I would go through the alphabet. I would think up a video game per letter. Sometimes I would go through game elements instead. Later I made a board game where you play alone remembering things. It could have used any type of memory. Where the dice lands and what number indicates the sort of memory you try to pull up.

        I incorporated drinks into it. Every Time I was able to remember something I drank. I also came up with a “list of 12 names.” That is a list of my favorite characters like in movies. I would remember things about them.

        However I came up with my best idea later. Remembering things alphabetically was kind of constricted. So I turned to a pocket dictionary, one only having basic words. I would flip through it and remember things based on the words I read. So if I saw “car” I would remember my first car, a trip, having one fixed, and so on. If you read “zoo” you remember being at one. It is something I should do more often. There is so much about life we have long forgotten. I once read the word “painting” and remembered this guy that came to a church our family went to. He would make these incredible paintings of things like bald eagles. I brought it up to my dad and he said “I haven’t thought about that guy in ages.”

Things From Our Childhood That Are Good To Return To

One time my friend laughed uncontrollably when I made fart sounds with my hand and armpit. He hadn’t seen that since he was in grade school. Do you remember all of those things we used to say and do? Things we would do with paper, with our hands, and things like that? We used to say in elementary school “see ya, wouldn’t want to be ya, even though I know ya, wouldn’t want to blow ya.” They are neat memories at least.

        I like to go to places of loose rocks and find some crystals. I can’t be fooled into thinking I would find gold. I thought as a kid any yellowish rock was gold. There are all sorts of neat looking stones in those places. Maybe you might even take it as a job. A job where you find rocks from turquoise to topaz. I just look for whatever is neat looking, those rocks that have color to them, different shapes, obsidian, crystals, cheaper and easier to find stones.

        Try getting ice cream from the ice cream man sometime, or playing a board game with someone. You might buy a toy every now and then. You might pick up things of nostalgia: an old video game, a skid row cassette tape. If I had my own home I would paint my walls with glow in the dark paint, no matter the price. I would at least have my living area that way. Go to a pool where you can be alone. Try an adult swing. Go roller skating. Buy a happy meal.

        Crafts can be fun. You could buy random things at the store, like straw and thread, and decide what to do with it later, like making a different kind of bead door from that. One where each straw is carefully painted?

         Play with your action figures. Return to video games if you have left them. Tinker and experiment with electronics like they are magic. Make the book you write handwritten: full of stickers, using a spirograph set, and scanned in. If you like to write music, just get a kid’s musical keyboard. Just let all of the joy of your youth return, as much as you are able to.

Squabblers

The most evil suffix in any word ends with an Ler, at least in most cases. Ler is the most evil sound that a human can make. For complainers, that is the squabbler. They complain about trivial things.

I met one on the bus yesterday. It is customary for people to leave the bus before new people board. This time though, a rush of ten people entered and ignored those trying to get off all together. A man trying to get off the bus said to them they weren’t letting him get out. One of them that just got in said “I’m not about to get out so you can, you should have gotten out when you could.” He had maybe two feet to step out and get away from the door for us. He felt offended about that. But what was the damn matter? He was a squabbler. The kind of person who gets mad at trivial things.

        I used to be a squabbler myself, to be honest. I grew well out of it at least. I used to go to a PSR group (a group where the mentally ill come together.) One in a house and the staff would have us join in prayer over lunch. They would let the women eat before the men too. I yelled out “Hail SATAN!” I got agitated by it. I had a friend there who was actually a Devil Worshipper. We were the only two there that had anything to do with all that there. There was a lot of Christinaity to go around. My friend pointed out though that things like that shouldn't bother me. I was a Karen  before Karen was a thing. It is almost like the world copied who I used to be. No one complained and raged over dumb things, threatening to call the police and things like that, back then. Going forward in time a little I learned better. I am glad I learned a lesson soon. For some such people they end up in jail themselves.

        It should take a lot to make you complain. It should only be after you seriously need to. Sometimes that is instant: if you are sexually harassed or something. Then you should complain right away. If things are only a little bad or if your complaint is at all unreasonable, then try not to. As for me the only instance I would call the police is if my life is in danger.

        Some people just won’t let you have any fun. That can agitate certain kinds of people. It so often seems for that very reason: someone else is having fun, and they don’t like it. “That’s against the rules!” So they lash out at people just having a BBQ at the park. One year my family were popping fireworks in a parking lot. I guess it was somewhat reasonable for the manager to make us stop. A better person would have just let us have our fun. She right away complained about it and we went across the street into a (very) empty field. We thought it was okay after that. But nope, here she comes declaring that we could harm the “burrowing owls” there and this must be put to a stop. The way she put herself forth was in a way as “you can’t have fun over there either.”

        

        It has gotten to where if you don’t have a phone (camera) you could get locked up by someone full of lies. It is an evil thing: to falsify what another did to you (they did nothing to you) but say you attacked them or whatever else because it would please them to have you locked up. Many have their manners misplaced. Meaning that if you do not do what is customarily polite, they will lash out at you. Once a really old man bumped into someone’s child. The mother thought it was a bloody murder. She shoved the old man who in fact died from the tumble he took. I don’t imagine she will have her kids anymore: she was charged with murder for that.

        Patience and maturity will take you far. So will wisdom. So be careful when out and about. You never know when you will encounter people such as that.

The World is Your Best Friend

Not so much the people in it. The richest would be most taken from. The rich are kind of left without any true friends. The moment you give of your wealth in the least, they will never stop coming at you for more. If you don’t give them anything to begin with, then they will detest you for it. They will wander around your mansion and envy every little thing about it. Even their spouse only cares about their money. Among the poor it is no better. Friends are people you take from. There is an atmosphere of sharing with nothing that sticks. Whatever can be peeled off for another will be.  

        But rather take the world as your friend. A friend that will only give. A great provider, your treasure. Mr. Restaurant, Mr. Movie Theater, Mr. Bar, are always there to serve you. A friend during a movie can talk. They want to tell you which one to watch and when. There is too much competition among fishers. By fishing alone you will always get the first catch. A band resents you for being the popular one: the singer who gets all of the interviews. Others make the band their name and the other players are just hired hands. They never have to worry about the band breaking apart.

        Worst of all there is marriage and children. Something that lasts about 18 years and sometimes more, depending on your production of new humans. Time is no longer theirs after that. Whole schedules are determined for them after that. Some of those schedules come out of nowhere in fact. Any time alone becomes precious. You no longer spend money on only yourself. You can afford less. You sleep next to someone who might snore. You are more likely to get sick. You cannot talk me into getting into a relationship for those reasons.

        

Not Letting Hate Ruin You

When our standards start to become distorted, hate can come easily, and even last most of the day. Things are thrown into chaos for some. They act chaotically at random times. They find controlling their anger difficult but as long as they keep trying they will find a way. Some however just let it stay within them until it becomes so natural they don’t notice it. They don’t notice they are picky. They don’t notice that they are rude towards others and kind of bossy.

        One thing that helped me was to not use cuss words. Cuss words are connected to anger, yet you can never say them loud and forcefully enough. The very word and anger are two in the same. I don’t even use them in my own mind anymore, whatever they are, even the word “hate” I have stopped using. I found that I can think about people in a decent way now. I am more able to diffuse arguments and things too. It was my father who taught me not to use the word hate. I should have listened to him sooner. Anyone who doesn’t cuss at another at least has that on their side. They can’t be accused of cursing out someone.

        Not controlling anger in time has caused dire consequences for some. It can get them fired, kicked out of their place, or jailed. Besides, anger is a painful emotion. It is like your mind is telling you that you are thinking in the wrong way. Just like picking at a sore though, we won’t let it alone. Maybe we can instead decide to come home and choose to enjoy the rest of the day without being bothered by anyone further. Maybe we can choose to be happy instead, to not “lose sleep” over anything. I had some anger issues in my time. I would snap over petty things. I overcame all of that. I would just walk out of a doctors office if the doctor took too long. I would be in the middle of a number of things and just walk out over anger and impatience. If something wasn’t fast enough, I would walk out. If someone had the slightest insult too, sometimes it was just all in my head. If I was met with disappointment in any way I would get mad. I took things too personally. I still get angry. Not often, though, and certainly not as intensely. I keep in mind that if I do not control myself I will do or say something I will regret later.

        They say things like you should “vent” out your anger. That if you don’t it will “erupt.” That is not really true. Some psychologists would say that that only teaches you to be angry. I am on the side that says so. After all, how much venting is too little and how much too great?

        Perspectives help. That is, having the right perspective can make us think in less angry ways and can keep us cool. For me, the buck doesn’t stop with me. Anyone who is naturally rude will end up on the wrong end of the stick. It isn’t going to be me. I am just a passing moment for them. But they are going to anger the wrong person someday and only end up getting themselves into hot water over it. I know that the wicked will be bundled together someday and strictly dealt with and I am not going to be among them.

Knowledge Evolves, Knowledge Belongs To The Master

It never belongs to the pawns. Do not let anyone tell you that a thing they have created (particularly religion) cannot be changed. They are just trying to hold a monopoly over it. To say that Catholics have it best and that is all to it, that they will not do things differently in any way, is to be caged by it. They do not want competition and will even brainwash you over the matter. The masters have tried to accept it as flawless but they just could not quite stay that way. The day comes for them that they know that what they have is better. It pours out so strongly that a great new religion is made by them. They did not listen to rules that only this person or that person had a say. They did not accept that things were perfect and could not be made better. They begin seeing flaws and they stop saying to themselves that this is the only way it can be. Then they come out with a better version of it.

        As for me and what I write, I am not a guy that holds a monopoly over it. I don’t say that my way is the only way. I do not say you cannot change anything I write. I do not say that my way is the only way. I just know better. In fact I encourage my followers to do whatever they want with my writings. Accept it, reject it, or change it. All of my books are free and in the public domain. I only want two things: fame and to make a positive change. Not control, nothing perverted, not power, not money, or anything other than those two (fame and having a positive change.) I have always been a person more about ideas and my ideas are free, whatever they are.

        Do not let people tell you that you cannot make a new version of this or that, that you must follow with tradition, that you cannot do something that someone you don't even know approves of. Be yourself, make yourself, make the better thing, just go for it.

Praiseworthy Crap

With the 20th century came atonal music and abstract art. With plastic came much cheaper things. With machines, human hands were less needed, if at all. Old lifelong talents are disappearing all the time. If a composer can just scribble notes onto a paper and be highly esteemed for it, as though it was calculated, then maybe it is suitable for classical music to see its way out. AI is now making art work. It can do in moments what would take days or longer for a human hand.

        A lot of clothes are just as cheap as can be, made up of plastic fiber and not built to last. They call it “minute fashion.” There are people in some places that live right next to the garbage dump and are allowed to freely take from it. They get their food that way. They are always saying “the rich should just give us the food they don’t want.” A lot of food isn’t food in fact and that falls under the same idea. While cheap things have gotten cheaper, expensive things have gotten more expensive. To have anything from before, those things handmade, those things made of the truly good material, are belongings that only the rich may have. The rest of us have things procured as cheaply as possible. We even forget that our things could be better.

The Spirits of Lucifer

It is a dog eat dog world. It is a world of predator and prey. Don’t ever feel guilty about getting the position that your friend wanted to take. It is a bold choice to take as much advantage that you can and to strive to raise higher. In your lifetime you will have hopefully done so. Be full of a competitive spirit.

We can wash away all doubts about ourselves. We can be tall and circulate only positive thoughts about ourselves. We can be bright minded. We can be proud of our accomplishments, our present state, and where we are going. Be full of a proud spirit.

We can be strong. We can overcome weakness. We can have the broad stroke over the weak one. We can make a place for ourselves. We can overcome our problems. We can be stronger than anyone who would make us weak. Be full of a strong spirit.

We can be ourselves. We can act and think on our own. We can dispense of anything that another would have us be. We can turn away from the popular to the things that we really like. We can have our own tastes. We can build uniqueness in us and have our own tastes. Be full of the spirit of individuality.

We can enjoy the world. We can find the greatest things within it. We can strive to get yet more. We can build a nice home here. We can embrace it in full and enjoy everything that it has. Be full of a worldly spirit.

We can progress. We can do those things that will take us further. We can do those things that make our lives better. We can increase our stature. We can become greater and greater. We can find a life of significance. Be full of the spirit of progress.

We can survive. We can go from bottom back to the top. We can flee to fight another day. We can find ourselves in a home. We can live through the worst of things and yet become stronger by it, not weaker. Be full of the spirit of survival.

We can enjoy life. We can bring the best of things to us. We can find and get them. We can find the best places to go and go there. We can appreciate everything that we own and take nothing for granted. Be full of the spirit of happiness.

We can sin, we can break rules, we can be immoral so long as we are not hurting others. We can be free. We can say what we want. We can create what we want. We can fill the world with the greatest of Satanic things. Be full of the spirit of freedom.

Creating The Satanic

If you want to be different from the start, then make it Satanic, which is especially good if a Satanic version of it hasn’t been made yet. For example: Mortal Kombat. That took inspiration from Street Fighter 2. The creators of Mortal Kombat did the same thing in a Satanic way. Whether or not that was deliberate doesn’t matter, but it was deliberate even if not in name. Remember that it does not even have to contain the image or name of Satan. Rock and Roll is Satanic music, even Van Halen. We have just lost our sensitivity to that. Some of it is a tad more noticeable, such as the Smurfs. Some are outright Satanic, like the music of Slayer. And there are Christians that would condemn Final Fantasy left and right.

        So what is the substance of Satanism? What is it composed of? There are a lot of answers to that question. It can be a sword and sorcery thing, something like D&D. It might be more obvious, such as blasphemy. It entails anything based on witchcraft. Some use the more subtle word: magic, but it is all the same. Things with demons and keep in mind that that’s not always so obvious. A demon is a spirit you call on. Could be pokemon. Could even be an alien from outer space. Likewise, action figures that look like demons are only Satanic idols. A trademark is an idol. A fast food sign, that is an idol. The neat image on a coffee cup that is an idol, a graven image. When you draw out your video game heroes, those are idols. Truly Satanism is all over the place.

        The Satanic might be a thing that counters Christian morality. It might be to say that one thing or another is okay even if it goes against permission from Christians. It can represent greed: to have better, wealth, the luxurious, the enjoyment of those things. It can be a thing made up of the worldly. It puts sin in a better light portraying it as harmless and acceptable. This is when the self righteous are most offended.

        Whatever adds to the mood: like the sound of a gong. Like the evil fairy. A blood red moon. The gothic. The darker things. Individually they don’t amount to much but taken as a whole they can be excellently Satanic. So be sure to consider every little element. You might even make up a list of such things and put them into your creation one by one. Whatever is spooky, things traditionally thought of as dark among music forms, the unfamiliar perhaps such as the pan flute, the otherworldly, the grotesque, scary perhaps, the hellish, and the profane, will all serve you well.

        Just no-no’s among Christians: having a different God, like Conan and “Crom.” Using magic, calling on spirits, the character resurrecting, being a different Jesus, the glamor of the wicked, sexuality, sinfulness, and so on.

Nothing Stays The Same Forever

The change you may be waiting for might come sooner than you think. By nature, people eventually turn things around. The rebel of today is not the one of tomorrow. The rebel makes new times as the forbidden fruit becomes more and more desirable. People get sick of the overdone and tired of being made into things. They no more want things like that dictated and just become sick of it. So things change. What is “good” is totally opposite to what it used to be. A person may think the causes a half century ago will remain, but they won’t. If grandma could see what was on TV these days she would turn in her grave. The philosophy of people is ever changing.

        Unfortunately the constitution has pieces of it that the Founding Fathers couldn’t predict. That’s to say things like great weaponry. For most part the constitution is timeless. It gives us rights we will always need. Having freedom of speech is just as relevant as it ever was. Freedom of religion, defending yourself, and so on, just the same. Politicians struggle with things like mega guns, however.

        Our nation (America) cannot be on top forever. Naturally I want it to be, I live here. But I know better than that. It is like Rome, Rome in its time was the most excellent of nations. Now it is just a spot on the world map that people do not give a lot of thought to. The same goes for all past nations. Such as Egypt, Great Britain, and all the others. I think as long as we are philanthropic then we have the right to exist, something true for all nations. That means giving people rights. It means being humane. It means to not harm its citizens or cruelly rule over them. Other than that I do not personally care who owns what or the name behind it.

        Unfortunately even the most democratic of nations can turn into dictatorships. If people push anarchy too strongly then that can only lead to things like police states. When the people can no longer be kept under control then a dictator may result. Rights might be whittled away over time. What was one violation becomes more. Things get to where loopholes can be made. The economy of a nation might collapse. Other nations may come against one of the greatest powers, and be overtaken. Being the top nation may not last forever.

        Relationships do not always last forever. Even in our romantic “our love will last forever” mindset. Even if the relationship does last forever you may find yourselves basically hating each other. One partner may find a lot of resistance towards ending it. The other just won’t allow it, and may become a harmful stalker. So they call endlessly and just make things worse. It becomes a thing they want more than anything: to end it.  People do not know what they are getting into when they promise to be with another for the rest of their lives. They might cheat on you just to get a way out. That one they cheat with is given all sorts of promises but they just leave them too when the coast is clear. The person you love most may become the one you detest the most.

        If someone wants to work on things that last they are better off with learning a talent and learning it well, and having what they make be their children. Children they can count on. That serves as they are intended to. That you know in and out and that can never be a disappointment. If you are in a relationship then it is good to be at least a little hated at all times. So long as it isn’t hate coming from over loving. They will always think at least a little that they must keep things together. They will always think they need to work a little harder. They will always put you up just a notch higher than they would if everything “was just a given.”

Saving Yourself

You are the best one at the job. You will either accept a bad life with bad people or leave it. The best do not allow it to begin with. So with friends who have gotten into drugs and bug them about taking them too, they are no longer their friends. They find a way to move out of a bad neighborhood knowing there are greener pastures. They put the authority in their lives to never be taken from. They will tell others no. They will have their own things and keep it that way.

        They do not go into bad neighborhoods, especially at night. They don’t do foolish things like that and are generally alert.

        They take health advice seriously. They treat ailments instead of ignoring them. There are many in this world that have fallen prey to problems that were easy to fix. Because of his stubbornness Al Capone’s intellect degraded. It came from a medical problem that could have been quickly fixed. Sometimes a person just needs a vitamin, if they are suffering from malnutrition in some way. Steve Jobs, the creator of Apple, died of cancer. He chose “natural” treatment over things like radiation treatment.

They pay attention. They pay attention in a car and they pay attention while walking about. If they sense danger they get out of the way. If they sense that someone has bad intentions towards them then they remove them from their lives or remove themselves from that person.

They make the right choice. They hand off what they must from a robber and just take it as a loss. They keep quiet around potentially dangerous groups. They turn the other cheek if they must. They give their assailants no reason to attack them.

They mature in life. They make smarter choices. They would never do anything that could imprison them. They are smarter than that. They do not start fights. They do not do anything that would rouse trouble. They would never senselessly attack someone. They know better than that. They generally follow the rules wherever they are. They do things that ensure their housing. They do not do sorts of things like egregiously breaking their lease.

They have a plan B. They save up money as possibly needed knowing that there are no guarantees in life. So when the worst happens they at least fare better than those who had no plan at all. They are survivors. In the darkest hour they maintain hope. They approach their problems in a more rational way.

They choose work over ill gotten gains. They choose isolation over bad people. They are discrete, not noticeable if that is for the best, and they do not do things such as show off what they own. They do not make targets of themselves. They fight for their rights if they have to. They do what they can to not be victimized by others.

Being Advantageous

I always pull up the example of the start of the computer era. There was a little company named Apple that was putting together computers in a garage. They were good at it and had a cheaper product for everyone and the rest is history. The same goes for Microsoft in fact. Then there were the guys at Atari doing the same thing. When they put up an arcade machine they returned to it the next day thinking it was broken. The only thing that broke it was that it had too many quarters in it. These were people that got into the game at just the right time. They were people of their time. While most of the world ignored what was being done in any field these guys took advantage of it. There is always the thinker of “I wish I had thought of that,” when things are too late. Being aware of the times and jumping on board can bring you great riches.

        Being advantageous also means having the right equipment, especially the equipment that others do not have. So spare no expense. If you are really going to set out to make something then get the best tool or tools. There are lots of them these days. Just look around. Being advantageous also means having a good plan. Just remember: thinking is not doing and actions do more than words. It may mean getting into the market in a unique way: one better than what they rest do. It might be coming up with an idea that is undeniably better. The kind of idea that others do not have or use. It may be finding a way to make something cost less. It might involve a patent. You don’t want anyone to take that from you. Know what you are going to do through and through before you begin putting it together. Then again, sometimes things should start as a rough draft, as long as you can go back to it and make it better and better.

You will either be at the top of the game or not. You might have to settle with being second best. It isn’t always easy to know the result of what you do before it comes out. You might think it was the best thing ever yet it does poorly and “the proof is in the pudding.” But keep trying, keep moving forward, and leave behind anything that refuses to be of any good.

  Being Prepared For Homelessness

It wasn’t before I was homeless before I knew what a homeless person most needs. I heard a guy tell me that a flashlight would be good to have. He knew nothing about being homeless. If you smoke then you may find yourself without a lighter and picking up “snipes” from the street. I often had no lighter problems. I hated asking all the time. It is a strong habit for me. What can I say? That is just the way it is. If you are the same way then having about four lighters can take you far. The only kind of entertainment I could afford was a pocket radio. It made my days a lot better though. I wouldn’t get the digital ones. Get the analogue ones, those that take AA batteries. Not AAA which do not last as long. The AA pocket radios can give you two weeks of power per battery. It was so much that I treasured two little batteries like they were gold in my pocket. Having a notebook and pens made my life better too. The best way to deal with the cold is with a trench coat: one like a blanket. Believe me, it may not seem cold in your home, but the middle of the night gets very cold wherever you are.

        People just sleep where they can. If they are removed then either the business owners do it themselves or they call the police. I was used to that. I didn’t really sleep to begin with. I preferred the small camp which was not really like a camp. Those that slept along a sidewalk over those with tents under the highway. The difference is that one leaves you alone, the other is more like a community. They will not let a person sleep in a chair. There is always someone that tells you to move if they see it.

        The rain is a terrible thing while homeless. A good raincoat, umbrella, and tarp are good to have. Your tarp can just be a shower curtain.

        And just keep away from others. You never know if they want to get you involved in drugs or prostitution or where they may take you.

        Have things of value to begin with. The smaller the better. Having bullion as with silver or something that can easily be sold. You might even have a new video game system. Those easily sell and can provide you with good money if you need it. Have money saved up. Know where to go if you must. Be ready to connect with family. They may have a home for you for a while. Take your job seriously and get another one if you must, as soon as you can.

Human Decency

I believe everyone deserves at least a little respect. Unless they are horrible people and deserve punishment. Jesus said that anyone who harms children should have weights tied to their ankles and be thrown into the sea. Maybe those without any human decency should get no human decency. Sometimes innocent people are harmed out of nothing but hate. That hate comes from intricate biases, may come from being bullied, may come from being abused, sociopathy, psychopathy, or sadism.

        We don’t usually get that bad. We each and all get angry at times. Sometimes we just explode in anger and cause a big scene, more or less depending on the person. I knew a person in a group who was angry all the time and only ever had hateful things to say. I knew bossy sorts of people who expected too much out of me. Then there are the covert people, “I was just playing with you.” Some are just jealous of you. Some are envious of you. Some just like to throw their weight around. Some really seem like they were born to be rude. If you rarely get angry then you are doing as well as you can.

        I rented a trailer home some years back. I had an outdoor cat. Apparently it bothered someone because I got a letter saying to “remove that animal from our premises.” They kicked all of us out like we didn’t matter, only the land did. That’s okay enough in itself but their greed really shined when they refused to give me my security deposit back. With my mothers help we even rented a vacuum soap machine to clean the carpet, as the property instructed us to. My mother was my payee back then and helped me out in my earlier years with Schizophrenia. She was determined to get my security deposit to use towards my next rental. They denied us though. That security deposit thing: you know that they spend that money and you aren’t getting it back without suing them. Things were different for me recently, though. I did a great job in cleaning my last place before I moved and felt honored when they did give me the security deposit back. Made me feel like a human being instead of  a money source.

        Fortunately my problems have been trivial.

        People are objects that make money for many people, many companies, corporations, and groups. The worst of it is slavery. Then there are sweatshops that may as well be slavery. There are the overworked and underpaid. In some areas in the world it is especially bad. People work to death every day with little to get out of it. Some are sent to labor camps for a decade or more over trivial things. The things these people go through.. One can only imagine.

        There are places in the world where protesting can cost you your freedom and even your life. They cannot perform the simple act of speaking out against a ruler. In some cases that is so strict that they will immediately be identified and punished for it, so much that you will never find more than a single person doing it. Some punishment involves a person’s family. They will not only punish you but them as well.

        Even in the best nations evil people exist. There are those that would act as a friend while getting you hooked on drugs, to get money out of you. To get more money, they force people into prostitution. There are people that have no regard for human life. They will take a life over a trivial matter. They care nothing of a person’s property and would rob any place they like. My High School principal once said “in Arab nations, if you steal, they will cut off your hand.” And added, “that may sound cruel, but no one steals in Arabian nations!”

        

Some Things Ignored In The Bible

The Bible says that the cup/bowl of wrath was given to Satan. Just know that cups and bowls are one in the same in the Bible. Jesus asked his father that the cup of wrath be taken from him. That was done, and the cup was given to Satan, who was there with him in the garden. Then in Revelations, that bowl is poured out over humankind in the time of tribulation (a time which may be occurring even now.) I learned this from a brilliant but rather underrated pastor, the late Pastor Arnold Murray. His son would later take over. His son said that most of the times that the Bible talks about marriage it means sex. Then God once said “be fruitful and multiply.” And Solomon had 300 wives. Then, I will bring up the question no Christian ever has: did Jesus use the bathroom? Did he take a crap like everyone else?

        Jesus was not at all a push over. He was friends with the bad guys: the tax collectors, the prostitute Mary Magdalene, and the sinners. He brought Paul into his own and Paul was a murderer. He stoned Christians. So Jesus is there with the bad guys. Jesus would go boldly about too, unafraid. He knocked over the money trays saying that they turned his church into a money making place. He said the most objectionable things that could be said, things that could get him into trouble, but things that were the truth. He was no coward. He was less a coward than just about any of us. He was an honorable person too often mistaken for something lowly. That’s too bad. He was the kind of person that would give his life for his friends. He said that he was not there for the righteous, he was there for the sinners. He in fact detested the self righteous more than anything else.

        There is the common question of who Cain married and had a child through. His mother Eve? Wasn’t that all the people in the world? Arnold Murray reasoned that God’s creation of Adam and Eve was different from the rest of the tribes of Earth. That Adam was an eight day creation. After all, Cain went to the land of Nod, which was full of people. People then existed before Adam and Eve.

        There is another common question: where is God? Why does he allow bad things to happen? The normal answer is: God gave us free will. But there is another reason: it is because we have rejected God. Just like what happened to the Israelites when they went against God, God put down the wall of protection for them until they returned to Him. God isn’t around because we do not want Him around (or at least not most, who would rather sin.) Would you help anyone who ridicules you? Would you be with them and love them and everything else?

        Does Hell really mean Hell? Is it a literal thing? Why should it be? The Bible is full of metaphors. A Christian will take what they want and leave out the rest. They want there to be a literal hell. A literal fiery place full of abominable suffering. When it says that Satan is a dragon, though, they do not take that literally.

        It says that “it is easier for a camel’s toe to pass through the hole of a needle than it is for the rich to get into Heaven,” the disciples then ask, “then how can anyone get into Heaven?” And Jesus says, “with man this is impossible, but with God nothing is impossible.” Salvation is a gift from God. It is not something we earn. Nothing can take it away. Jesus said that not a single sheep that God has given him is lost. He is a good shepherd. The only two things required of us is faith and asking for our sins to be forgiven. So don’t let anyone tell you that you are going to hell. Once saved you are always saved. It can even be argued that the less you try to save yourself the better.

More Evidence Towards An Isosociety

We can be around just who we want to be around, whoever and whatever that is. Is there segregation in the virtual world? Can you be around the kind of person you want to be in the virtual world? Or will it force diversity? An Isosociety is emerging. Better worlds are being carved out for people through tech. It will actually bring all together, just in synthetic ways. A person’s home or room will be like a Kingdom. There will be less and less reasons to even leave the house. All of our things will be brought to us. Our homes will contain the best things, things we simply cannot have on the outside. Even our deliveries will be from machines. Further down the line we will have self cleaning clothing and blankets. Our places will remain very clean due to machines. We could much better share things or sell them as our own deliveries will be made through machines. We can already print out our own postage labels.

        The days of going to the theater may soon be over. I was at Target yesterday and saw this enormous TV. It was comparable to the size of a small theater. The cost wasn’t bad either. Perhaps gotten on one paycheck at low wage. We can bring in things like never before. Our homes can much more be just what we want them to be. For me that means a moon chair (which is a half a sphere shaped chair tilted upwards.) I am just about done shopping at our major outlet here in San Francisco. I realized that it no longer has the things I need, save for those things I must buy regularly (soap, hygiene stuff, and cleaning stuff mostly.) Every other thing of importance I have already gotten there. Our trips at the store are shortened to begin with. We can use a credit card to have things gathered for our pick up. I remember when getting a visa gift card was not so easy. Now when I go into any store there are rows of them. I in fact sometimes only go into a store to get one. Now that I have run out of things to get in town, with the limited selection of things there are, I have been shifting to buying things online. I cannot even find a good set of stickers at these stores. Nor stencils. The sort of thing I need for my handwritten books, books that are scanned in and published.

        Everyone wants to work at home. The virus that came around recently put a lot of work into home. People began calling each other instead and going online to do their work. Everyone wants self employment and to work at home. For some that means becoming famous enough on YouTube. As such they get a lot of advertising dollars. Some want to make games and put their hope in that. Some want to be authors, like me. Some want to sell things from home. Some want to create websites and little stores online and so on. There was a time when making an action figure or good plastic things was a silly idea but with 3D printers a lot can be made easily, quickly, and cheaply.

        Education itself is coming from the internet more and more. Who needs a teacher at some place across town? There are large numbers of teachers for any given thing, teaching just the way you want them too. With AI produced things, entire essays can be produced. That is a very modern problem. The teachers are having trouble knowing if a student’s essay is real or not. Besides other cheating, like mathematically, who needs a physical teacher before them? That is a matter that needs to be addressed sooner or later.

        What’s more: AI can make art, can make music, and make video games. No education needed. No education needed to tell a machine what to do. No carpentry skills needed. No fashion designer needed. No editor needed: not with grammar fixing software. No driver instructor needed: cars can self drive.

        Do not worry about the machines taking our jobs and doing every little thing for us. We can in fact work for ourselves at that point instead of for someone else. We can do the things we personally want to do. That along with our increased resources will result in universal basic income (guaranteed income for all with a chance to make more) especially with some key scientific advancements such as fusion power.

The Details Are The Unholy Spirit

In Hell the details are often endless for a person. I will give an example: I spent an entire night there trying to make this perfect image. The image properties themselves were carefully decided: a dragon with a ying yang tail and hand, phoenix wings, a lightning bolt tongue, a crown on its head, an udjat for the eye. I tried all night long trying to make the perfect image. I went through about 500 sheets of printer paper in doing so. But I never achieved what I wanted. It was this sort of obsessiveness that led me to create the principality list. For ordinary life thinking can be shallow. In hell things are delved far into and the thinker of it is not satisfied until some long time, if at all. They can get stuck into a thing for weeks or even months.

        It is the perfection of an idea that a person in hell wants. That may be about art, electronics, things said (which was a particular problem of mine) or even making the perfect video game controller. In any case, the person in hell is relentless at making it perfect. They hone in on it as carefully as can be, piece by piece, element by element. For me it was often the things I wrote: to make them the perfect thing said. Something of great depth in just a little paragraph. Remember what hell is to begin with. I wrote about that earlier in this book and in other books.

        There is no end to such things. It is an abyss. Such a person can turn something as simple as giving gifts into an intricate system. They can come up with all new vehicles. They take somewhat short music and perfect that, melody and motif, theme, the instruments doing what they will. They might even work on the same music for years and take every little thing seriously. It can go in the wrong direction too. I once tried to perfect my hair through my own hair cut. There is no such thing but you are just that way in hell sometimes. I came up with an awful mess and it was apparent that there was something wrong with me if you were to see it. So it can either make a good thing or be greatly misplaced. It is like Leviathan in the depths. Hell is often associated with a pit.

Do the shake, do the shake, do the wake, do the hip-py shake

Daylight com, mon, me wanna go home

Iza day, iza day, iza day-yay-yul.

All You Gotta Do Is Live And Die

Sometimes saying that to myself helps. What is here now is gone tomorrow. Why should I focus so intensively on things? The best I can do is make good of the moment. There is a lot about life that is meaningless. I came up with the philosophy that if I can make any 45 minutes good then that is the best I can do. There are some days better than others. After I have done a lot of monthly shopping I even feel high sometimes, but poor later, as it is not a feeling that can go on forever. Then I spend weeks waiting for the opportunity to get more. Sometimes a nice thing comes unexpectedly. I thought I had an appointment a month ago, the next day. I kept thinking I wish I could do that some other time. Then I realized I got my schedule wrong. It wasn’t for another few days. I felt so relieved. It was going to conflict with some things I had been working on and with cashing my check, to top things off. It was like heaven came down and gave me a few extra days.

        Maybe my legacy has already been created. That would be nice. After writing over 50 books I feel I can take a little more time on each one. Normally I write 100 pages. This one will be around 145. What I really want is to have an existence online when I am not even online. That comes a little from my fear of jail. That in turn comes from the fear of what my mental illness can bring about if I ever mess up on medication again. Most of all though, just some recognition. A positive change, fame too, a life of greater significance. I am sure that time will come. In the meantime I have a pretty mediocre life! Just sitting around mostly. Writing has got to be the laziest job.. It isn’t much different than just running your mouth.

        Good things come to those who wait. I was bristling over the James Webb Space Telescope not long ago. That billion dollar telescope we sent a million miles from Earth. That is much more a testament of our abilities than going to the moon was. You never know when something interesting will show up on the news. I once had a great appreciation for the apocalyptic. That was when I was homeless and my life was hopeless, however. Now keep the great man away, because I am enjoying life.

        I take things for granted in fact. We all do. We could have things we never dreamed of before. But they just become more of the same. The first nice TV I got I treasured. It was at first a thing with a large screen then became just another screen. It was a 32 inch CRT TV. Now I have a 43 inch TV and that is just a normal thing. Gratitude therapy works because it brings you appreciation for things. You either like something or it is just something you have around.

        But why all the struggle? Should I intensively delay my death if it means sacrificing something I really enjoy? Isn’t it better to be along for the ride? I imagine that a rose may be a tad poisonous, but is it better to stop and smell them or pretend that they don’t exist? Seems like there is death in everything we enjoy. Sugar, fried food, alcohol, coffee, lack of exercise, and so on. Living longer can be a difficult undertaking yet you never know when you are going to go anyway. It all sounds like Ecclesiates and honestly Solomon said it better.

        

What I Have Is Enough

I like to make prayer sheets. They are sheets of paper I spruce up and put written prayers on. A part of that is putting ribbon onto the borders of the paper. I was buying the ribbon on Ebay. That can be a place for “quantity sales,” or sales that break up larger packages and sell the things in them individually. After getting them on Amazon instead I got dozens of them for about the same price. I have more of those than I will probably ever need. The same is true for a lot of my things. I have enough trash bags for a year or more. For one person that doesn’t even cost a lot. I bought ten bars of Dial soap so the same is true for that. Toothpaste is cheap. I get toothbrushes for about a dollar each! I have a TV that will probably never break. Even if it does, not for ten years. Refrigerators are among the longest lasting appliances even if they cost a lot.

        San Francisco has nice enough weather that all I need is a powerful fan for the hot days and a small heater for the warm ones. I have ice I need. The tea too. And coffee. Will never need another lamp. Light bulbs last a long time. I have some nice blankets. I have three laptops. A good cell phone for the next couple of years. Lots of clothes, all without any stains. The laundry machine is free here. Laundry soap for one person lasts a long time. So I have all I need.

        So I bought some expensive rings. For me they were to show how far I have come. Something that will last forever. These gold rings that together cost a thousand dollars. I found myself sending more gifts to my family too. It has actually become a bit bothersome to spend my money while I have everything I need. Apart from an expensive thing breaking, which is unlikely, I just don’t need it.

Hygiene and Cleanliness

Body odor does not mean human attraction. They can talk about pheromones all they want but it just is not true that humans have sexual attraction to body odor. It repels people. It makes a person feel like puking. It makes them want to leave the room as soon as possible. That is not attractive. It's disgusting. Even if all you do is sponge bathe, it should be done. Deodorant, brushing your teeth, and having clean clothes, are also important. Dirty clothes just make you feel sloppy and can even be depressing. There is actually a thing called clothing fatigue where people get tired of putting on new clothes every morning. A part of that is having to decide. It may be because you feel that the clothes you slept in are good enough. We aren’t cartoon characters though. People notice when we have the same thing on for three days. Since I smoke I have to put my clothes into plastic bags and seal them, or else hear complaints all day about the smell of smoke.

        You can enjoy it though. You can enjoy picking out bath sponge. I got one the other day with a handle. You can get just the right body wash and go to different brands along the way. We all have a favorite soap. We all have a favorite deodorant. That is unless we just want something cheap. It isn’t a special feat that deodorants pull off anyway. It all works.

        It is too bad that we cannot smell our own odor. That would allow us to take showers when we needed to instead of how we do. Be sure though, for all a person knows they can be walking around smelly and none the wiser. Sometimes you just have to leap right in whether or not you want to. The first part done will take care of the rest.

        As for keeping a clean home: I only have a few dishes. That way whenever I need one I have to wash it. I just wash them right after I use them anyway. I am only a foot away from my sink in this hotel room, anyway. I have a tile floor that was a burden to clean. I had gotten an air mattress. I thought it would make my mattress more comfortable. It ended up as carpet for me instead and honestly, with its furry design, made for good carpet. To fill in the rest I got yoga mats. Just as well carpet, padded carpet at that. Now a quick go over with a vacuum cleaner will do.

        I always do things along the way. I always keep my food stored away in large containers with locking lids. I give a mouse no reason to be in here. No matter how clean I am I get roaches. It wasn’t a lot while it was happening. I would see one about every two weeks. That was until I put up some glue traps. Like behind my freezer, mostly. They are good to get rid of any kind of bug. Since I started doing that I haven’t seen a single bug in over a year. I recommend those, especially if you have a small living area.

        I have seen some nasty sponges in my time. The kind that smelled bad. I can use the same one for a while before I need them. I rinse out my dishes before they go in the sink. I wring out my sponge every time. They last longer that way. They are in fact one of the cleanest things in my room. I don’t leave food on them. They just know soap.

        I prefer the peroxide and baking soda toothpastes, dial soap, any good body wash, any good deodorant, Tide laundry soap, using Ajax or Comet, Pinesol, non bleach cleaning spray, Dawn dish soap, using sponges and paper towels, Q-Tips, an electric razor, a simple Red Devil vacuum cleaner, and storage containers to have my things put away and organized, and that is all I really need.

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

I had a Satanist friend that liked the saying. He was hinting something at me. It was a lesson learned later in my life. Every time I decided to start out trying to learn or do something special I would tell everyone I knew. What I didn’t know was that all I cared about was impressing people. Once I did, I somehow lost interest in continuing it. I would have been better off holding off on telling anyone. That’s because I would have grown eagerness to reveal it and would have had something to reveal in the first place. Think of it this way: you either say you are learning a new language right away or later. If you do it right away then people will see it coming. If you wait until you actually learn it then they will be surprised by sure. You suddenly start talking in an all new language? When did you start doing that?

        There is another thing about forespeaking. You only obligate yourself that way. If you say you are going to do something you put yourself on a spot. You even feel obligated after that as though you have taken your choice away. If you just do it without saying you will, then you are always free not to if you change your mind. Besides, it is better to surprise people. That is why I do not tell my family I am sending one of them a gift, like a birthday gift, until it is done and on its way.

History Repeats Itself– Especially Bad History

Humans have a desire for war. Not all nations, and not all people, but enough that war has been waged since the earliest days. When we look at apes we see them gang up on other gangs of apes. We see animals fighting in packs. We humans are much the same, whether on a small scale or an enormous one. So as much as people say what they will against war, it is in ways inevitable. Hopefully we will grow as a race and overcome those desires someday. What do you see in our science fiction stories though? Humans going out into space to wage war with aliens and aliens against other aliens. It is in the very title of the most beloved franchise: Star Wars. If we are not fighting against each other we are fighting against machines, as in the Terminator franchise. We like war. We like war stories. We like war fantasies, as shown in movies, books, and video games. Those against it just invite drama over it. They are the ones more likely to present the woes of war in their movies.

        

Once abusive, always abusive. You cannot count on your partner changing his or her ways, as hopeful as you might be. Some will absolutely leave their partner the moment it first happens. Others will not. I encourage such a person to leave the relationship just as quickly as they can. Unfortunately they may become irate over that, however, and one is in a dangerous situation: damned if they do, damned if they don’t. They say that sexual predators are never cured of their sickness. Maybe they should be castrated. With the horrible things they do? I would say so. You may or may not remember Jodi Arias. Her partner was a pervert. I believe he sexually abused her and that should have been taken into account. I believe that any abused partner should always be heard out on how they were being abused, if the day comes that they could tolerate it no further.

California once had a “three strike” law. If you commit a crime a third time then there is a harsher sentence. There is a much greater sentence. Sometimes drastic laws have to come about in order to keep society together. Once a person gets away with about the third awfully bad thing they have done they realize they have nothing to lose. It even comes to the point that they brazenly do illegal things. That is a reason why a lot of people are caught. In any case the first time they commit a crime is likely to result in more until they are not even self aware of it any longer. It is like a very discreet drug dealer. At first the person is always looking over his shoulder. Over time though they are letting anyone and everyone at their house come buy drugs. It becomes openly blatant and they are not even aware of it. You could say “three wrongs make a fool.”

The Light, Dark, And Gray Side of..

War

The light side of it is that it gets society in high gear. It can help with a nation’s economy. Many good things have been invented due to it. The light side is the side fighting for rights and human decency. They can overthrow horrible dictatorships, freeing many.

The dark side of it is obviously the death toll. Many will die during the course of a war. It can even be quite catastrophic.

The gray side of it is things like Israel getting its nation back after World War 2. This territory theft being undone. The war crimes are accounted for and those bad actors were later executed. The cleaning up after it all. That it took measures as drastic as the Atom Bomb to halt it. While many lives were lost due to it, potentially more were saved.

Fashion

The light side of it is the pride that good clothes give you. They make you more popular in school. They at least keep you from being unpopular, as the person in rags is bound to be. You just feel better in good clothing. The light side is that we have the pick of the litter because of online buying. We can get exactly what we want. We can even have our own designs created.

The dark side of fashion is the price. Some can afford it, but even the richest can find high costs for them. It depends on how far you can personally accept the cost. The people at fashion shows and the models that present it are often heroin addicts and anorexic. The dark side is getting something really good then getting a stain on it. I had a pair of Nike shoes that were well made. They looked nice. But the material wasn’t right: it showed stains too easily. They became ugly after getting some water on them.

The gray side of fashion is the “minute fashion.” It is good clothing, but cheap clothing. You can go from one thing to another more quickly that way because it is cheap to begin with. So you at least have variety. But that is bad for the environment. The gray side is when you feel proud of what you wear but later realize that you may be looking strange. Like a trench coat, you later see that maybe you were standing out too much as though you were special. The gray side is also just getting tired of your clothing. When you first bought it you were very proud of it. While it still looks new, you just don’t feel any different for wearing it anymore. Another gray side thing is when it is uncomfortable but looks good. Something tight feeling maybe, or maybe not warm enough, but it looks good on you.

Food

The lighter side of food is that it can be enjoyable. We do not need a whole lot of food to survive. Restaurant trips are quite nice. It is good to get a good burger now and then. It can be fun cooking. It is a very versatile thing: cooking. There is a lot to choose from otherwise, whether from a grocery store or any particular restaurant you want to go to.

The darker side to food is that it can cause things like obesity and diabetes. Those can lead to a score of bad things. Diabetes is one of the worst conditions you can have. You have to prick your finger daily due to it. You might necessitate amputations because of it or face a coma. Obesity can lead to a heart attack. Also, we must cook our food if we are not going to “catch a bug,” a possibly very harmful one. We can get salmonella from food. Things like that can bring about terrible pains. Another really bad thing is instances when the people cooking our food do not wash their hands and even spit into it, out of spite. Whoever really knows what is happening in the back of a restaurant.

The gray side of food is that good tasting food is bad for you. The gray side is when you become full. The gray side is having to wash the dishes after you are done. You won’t eat celery but you will eat peanut butter celery. You won’t eat broccoli by itself but you will eat it with cheese. It might take work to prepare the food. You have to go buy what you need. There is a little work there but the work can be fun and very rewarding. Leftovers are a gray thing. It doesn’t taste quite as good as fresh but can still be tasty. Microwave food is gray: is not as good as homemade but is quickly ready for us.

Money

The lighter side of money is that “it makes the world go round.” It makes our world a better place with better things. It is an entity of progress. It gives us a physical thing to work for and to become better for its sake. The lighter side is spending it. The things we get, the things we desire, we can get when we have it. Shopping can be a therapeutic thing.

The darker side of money is when it is gotten by criminal means. That includes the most horrible of things such as stealing organs for it. Some would rob or even kill just for it: this paper that means so much. The darker side is that some have it and some do not. Those that do not are homeless and starving while there are people in the world living lavishly because of it.

The gray side of it is the excitement for it, when you know you will have it soon. It is spending your money on paper before you even get it. Writing down your budget until it is as good as can be is the next best thing to having it in hand. The gray side is when it has all been spent. You now have a lot more things than you did before and it is time to enjoy that a while longer before you find yourself waiting for the next time. For a short time you are not thinking about the next time, are just happy with your new found things. It is gift giving. While you cannot enjoy it yourself, you can through another. The gray side is that money brings progress, which is good in its own right, but perhaps more should be given to the poor instead of towards smartphones.

Pets

The lighter side of pets is that they love you. They are gracious towards you. You always know what to expect out of them. They will never run their mouth off at you or argue with you, because they can’t. They only require you to take care of their health and to feed them. They are easier to manage than any human friend. They are good company with no strings attached. A pet can protect you too, if even just acting like an alarm.

The darker side is when they attack you, unpredictably. It may be a pet like a bulldog. They can very well kill you if they do attack you. The darker side is rabies. Reminds me of Stephen King’s Cujo story. A family's dog chases a rabbit into a hole where bats are living, one which bites the dog giving it rabies.

The gray side to pets is like a hamster. They do not live long but are inexpensive as a pet and are easy to care for. Hamsters do not make much of a mess. Just give it new bedding here and there. It doesn’t eat much more than seeds. They do die quickly though and that can be a sad thing. It is like a snake. You like having the snake but you know it can never possibly care for you. It is good to have a pet but you have to feed it and clean up after it. It is a responsibility. Not a great and difficult one but an important one.

Habits

The lighter side of habits are the good habits: cleaning, working on a project, learning something, working toward anything, and just keeping things together. Once you get yourself into a habit then you can count on continuing it. We just have to take it upon ourselves to get them started. You may have gotten out of a good habit. In that case the best thing to do is to get back into it and after a few tries then maybe they will become a part of your routine again.

The darker side are the bad habits one can have: addictions, alcoholism, too much sugar, salt, or caffeine, napping too often, staying awake too long and it interferes with your job, and so on.

The gray side of habits are you can be doing better but at least you are doing. At least you cut down on things. At least you have things under control. You have the important things taken care of. You are most of the way there. You have at least what you need to finish something. You might be on a break at the time but it is a necessary one.

Dreams

It is good to have them. The lighter side of dreams is that they give us purpose and direction. They give us things to strive for. If we succeed then they can make our lives better. There are many dreams to choose from and there is one that is precisely best for us. We may want to be in a band that is signed, a successful author, painter, business person, find self employment, or whatever else. We may win or fail, but at least we tried.

The darker side of it is that after a lifetime of work you may have not succeeded. You might have even wasted a portion of your life trying. You may have even had better things you could have been doing all the while. Your dreams may have cost a lot but that money towards it didn’t amount to anything. Like setting up a restaurant you were sure would succeed, but did not.

The gray side of it is that jealousy may come along with success. You become a great person but to your family you are the same. You now have “friends” that want to take from you. They want a piece of your pie or even a chunk of it. The gray side is that we may have strived for the very best but have only gotten second best, or third, or fourth, or less, but that is enough. That is better than none.

A True Luciferian Is Complete Within Him or Herself

There are people with simply nothing to be said. They are looked down upon by those who talk all the time. But what the big talkers do not know is that the silent person is greater than them. They do not need the acceptance of others. They do not need extensions of themself. They are whole, not fragmented. They are complete within themself.

        They will not suffer the fate of being in a bad group. They will not succumb to peer pressure that gets them into drugs. They will not compete towards trivial things. They will go about more quietly. They will not be pronounced wherever they are. They will have no secrets to tell. They will not have quarrels to deal with. They operate in their own way. By appearance they may seem like a simple minded person. They are people who perform their jobs right where it is that for most people jobs are a social situation. Friends + work for some, and for the other a thing to do what is required of them in order to be paid.

There is the test of “if you talk to yourself.” If you talk to yourself then you are a lonely person needing contact. If you do not, then you are fine with being by yourself. There is a period for some who are lonely, however, which is in finding themself. Once they have found themselves, something they can only do after being forced to be alone, then they will become themself. If not, then they just become more and more crazy. It is like they are ever looking for a supplement they cannot find, not knowing it is within them.

The complete person thinks for themself. They have uniqueness in all they like and enjoy. Those that pick up popular books are just wanting to be a part of its crowd. When a complete person reads they read on their own. When they find an interesting thing it wasn’t brought by another. If anything different is ever going to be made it is because of them. They can stay away from the atmosphere of sharing. They are not taken from. They have just what they need without any thought of turning straight to a “friend” to give them their portion. They do not have a lot of noise in their head that involves other people. They think more for themselves and more about themselves. They find the best way forward. There are none blocking the way. They are Luciferians.

More Lost All The Time

People in today’s time are leading themselves into disaster. They are the majority that do. They are the minority that do not, for sure. Their light is the light of pleasure like an animal that devours and knows nothing else. They are sub-intelligent. They come in different shades. Some get so wrapped around their causes that they cannot live for themselves, yet they think they do. They are the home shifters that can never spend time alone in their own house. For them life is about meeting one friend then the next and sometimes just sitting on benches to watch people until someone comes along. It is a means for fast food for them, or drugs, or cigarettes, through begging, through sharing. Through anything other than their own hands. They are master hustlers.

        Where they go though has no meaning. It is a place to eat, to talk to others, to drink, to do anything other than: reading, learning, working, developing a talent, or making a better and more meaningful life. It’s no wonder why things are so bad right now. No one takes life seriously! They want everything but are unwilling to give anything for it. They are lost in places without principles. They are caught up in selfish and hedonistic lifestyles. Because of confounded ideologies they have lost grasp on what is truly good about life. Those ideologies are becoming more complex all the time.

        They are a people of many idols, and they worship those idols. They include the newest highest brand smartphone, the largest TV, the ever evolving fast food places, along with the advertising that indoctrinates them. The trademarked symbols say it all. Their devils are without substance. They do not either hate or love their devils. They are devils without any real meaning. They are ignored. Yet propaganda doubles down on them, ever warning them of things that fall on deaf ears. Modern morality has little substance and meaning. The values they generate, just the same. Real values are a lost thing. Some of the things that made past societies great are even stigmatized, such as strength, and yet strength is true tolerance.

        If you are among such people then I hope my helping hand has pulled you out of the water. I have said all along in this book how to not be among them. Fortunately the solution is not difficult, but its depth is worthy of us. The more we can be ourselves the better.

A Nation of Free Thinkers

Nothing could do the world any better. It means the kind of people who are not always copying each other. So music branches out into many directions suddenly. So do other forms of entertainment. We see in the minority of companies new and innovative things. We see in the rest people copying those ideas. It is like video games before Nintendo. It is like the times they have been ceaselessly copied.

        It means more inventive and innovative people. I refer to the kind that experiments with things. The kind that invents new things within the laboratory in their homes. That may even learn new electronic principles. There is the story of a great math equation solved by accident: a student was late for class. He went in to see the teacher. No one was there. He saw an unsolved equation on the chalkboard and assumed it was the homework. So he went home, solved it, and brought it back to the teacher. What he didn’t know was that he solved a very difficult equation that was not yet solved. It speaks for the power of an individual. Similarly, things are stumbled upon by individuals while trying to create something else. Or, something is created that becomes more useful in an unexpected way.

        I am not saying that we are without such people. I am in fact saying that free thought is increasing. It is because of the internet. We are not living in times where music is only gotten on radio, CD, or TV. We have it all over the place online, both old and new. Becoming a popular musician is more individually done than ever. People post their songs online now for everyone to see, as opposed to something like a cassette tape. So that has increased free thought.. Free doing, free making of things. Likewise, learning is no longer confined to teachers and books. Far from it. A person can be taught in a large number of ways online. Things that a person was hopeless at ever doing they now can. It includes things like working on video game consoles, learning electronics, carpentry, really whatever at all you want to learn you can. If your thing is melting down scrap metal into bars you can do that. As a result: individualism is increasing.

Things Lost And Things Gained

The thing I most sorely lost were video game magazines. Magazines of all kinds have been lost, even publications that were around for half a century. Video game manuals too. They were such a nice addition to any physical game. I would rather have a cart based physical game over a CD, in fact. They came in nice boxes with a sleeve. I miss the act of holding the games and looking through them, renting them, too. Then again, I question if that was really better. Maybe I am blinded by things of old from my childhood. All you have to do to play them anymore is punch in a credit card number, a prepaid card if you want. When game streaming comes along (I am guessing it will) then a console will no longer be needed. As for that I see it as a good thing. Less to break.

        I have been so spoiled by it all that I can no longer appreciate it. When I was a kid owning ten games was great. To have more than that, a dream come true. With emulators and ROMS, I have it all at once. It is like with cable TV going from a few channels to hundreds of them. Or these days it is more and more internet streaming TV. I can’t choose! There is too much to pick from. I have no fear of missing out on something. In the past if I didn’t watch it when it was playing it could be a long time before I saw it again. Or I had to go rent the movie or buy it if there was any chance of seeing it. The same goes for music, I am spoiled by that in the same way.

        I wonder if food replicators would do the same thing. I imagine at first I would love being able to eat what I want when I want, instantly. I am sure over time I will have tried every last thing I ever liked and after that it would just be more and more the same. As it is, I have a hard time finding fried mushrooms. Not to mention something like that can cause obesity problems.

        They say that 90s music was the pentacle of music videos. It was the end of an age where music videos were mostly viewed on TV. Only a small amount of them would reach TV too. Ironically however, record companies learned what music lovers wanted out of their videos: just “lyrical videos.” Nothing special really. Just lyrics going across the screen as the music played: in a fancy way. They could have saved themselves a lot of time and money. In fact I have observed that TV was way off the mark all along. The things people watch on YouTube were the sorts of things the TV never had or thought of. Now we know the truth. Some of it is rather simplistic in fact. Just top ten videos of all kinds. People doing neat things with machines or whatever. Video game videos of all kinds (speed runs, history of, competitions, reviews, top tens, evolution of, comparison videos, and just people sitting there and playing them.) The bulk of what we like are the things most cheaply put together and are the most simplistic of things.

         Basic or Acceptable, Acceptable or Decent, Decent or Good, Good or Great, Great or Perfect?

They say that if you want something to be done right you have to do it yourself. Finding good employees may not be easy, especially if your standards are too high. If you have gathered to make something then having the best team possible is essential. Such as a video game making team, and anything involving music (if that applies) calls for the best you can find. Those areas that can make or break a project should be given the most attention with the best hands found. There are some jobs that just call for simple things. Such as being a receptionist. Maybe even a very basic one who just answers the door. Hopefully you have a natural talent for the degree you chose. We shouldn’t delve into things we are not naturally good at. If we pursue something we are naturally good at then getting a degree for it is much easier. I have a theory that anyone who learns something they are not naturally good at never really do retain the things they learn, and they become difficult again over time. With some jobs there is no such thing as being perfect. With others, it is required, I would use military jobs as an example of the jobs that demand your perfection. Some jobs are in making things that only you are good at. Their quality very much depends on you. With some jobs it has nothing to do with your own talent. Punching costs on a cash register for example, at most you can become fast at it. Some jobs just require you to be thorough. Like being a janitor. Anyone can vacuum, sweep, mop, throw out trash. Not everyone has the patience to take their time on it instead of getting done too early. It really requires a lot of patience. That was once a job of mine. I grew up getting money from my grandparents pulling up weeds at their business. That is an instance where the temperature outside is a problem. My grandfather once said that if I wasn’t sweating then I wasn’t working. They had an apple orchard too from which I plucked good apples and threw away the bad ones. It is one of those things that can feel overwhelming. You look at a great row of trees and have a tougher sense of your progress and how much more there is to go.

        I had a boss that didn’t care how much I did. He was more like a work mate. We worked on a cattle farm digging ditches and laying pipes. I had the embarrassing problem of not understanding instructions however, which was an early sign of my mental illness. There was a time when I went blank headed and couldn’t get my focus, my understanding of what they were asking me to do. The boss was easy on me though while we leisurely got things done, as there was no one there to observe what we were doing or not doing. I had a boss that was such a mean, nasty, and demanding person that I quit on my first day. That should have been an easy job but the boss was too unpleasant to stay. A job might sound easy and doable, but then you find a person such as that acting in a dictating fashion.

        Sometimes I hear “I thought it would have been an easy degree,” or “I thought it would have been an easy job.” Such as with nursing and with psychology degrees. You can be sure, the people that make the classes and textbooks are doing all they can to make you perfect at it. They don't want to be easy on you. They want to make good pupils. That is, unless you are just in a community college. I passed classes in a community college that I probably shouldn’t have. The teachers at Harvard though are very proud of what they know and take their job as a proud one, making you the best they can.

Then the same thing but with what you buy..

I am willing to pay a little extra if it means that I get a better thing. Sometimes I end up deciding on spending much more. If I am at the store looking for something I know I will use again and again, regularly, then I push myself to spend a little more than I planned. Such as a time when I went in for a comforter blanket. I looked at the cheaper ones, most of them were at a low price, except for one. The one that cost much more was pure cotton and well stitched. The others were polyester. In the end I got the much better one. I am glad I did. I think back and think I am glad I didn’t stick myself with a poor blanket at the time.

        Sometimes though the higher quality is trivial. You might get batteries that last just a couple of days longer yet cost much more. Peanut butter is peanut butter other than that all natural kind that is full of oil.

        Sometimes generic is acceptable. All aspirin is aspirin. There is no special aspirin. As long as the dose is the one you want the rest doesn’t matter.

        If you are collecting things like old video games then those can run much higher with just a little more quality than the others. You can either get a raggedy box or one more like new. I remember a story of how someone got their niece a valuable comic book one year, decades ago, but if he just got the variant that cost a little more then the value would have been far greater. There are times when people are wrong about something that will raise in value. I got my brother a comic book that I thought would go up in value nicely. I overlooked one thing: it was not a memorable series. So the effect was “what’s that?” It was a comic that no one would look for, in other words. Then there was the thing with two dollar bills. Everyone thought those would be valuable someday but that didn’t happen.

        Sometimes buying the better brand is ideal. Like with the price of the thing being low to begin with. Such as a bic lighter or bic pens. It is worth getting those because even though they are brand names they are inexpensive to begin with.

To put it into rules:

Find the job that is just right for you. There are many to choose from. Figure out what they require. Do they require too much? Do they require labor, or patience, or intellect, and are those things that you have? Does it pay enough?

If you use something regularly but it is something that lasts a long time, then pay extra to get something better. Such as an electric razor, a cooling system, a microwave, or a bed and its blankets.

Do not be fooled by expensive brands which are just as good as those that are generic. As for me I have never drank regular black tea that tasted any better than any other kind.

If you buy something for its increasing value then be careful in knowing it will. Like with Beanie Babies, everyone thought that those would only go up in value. They certainly didn’t. More recently people thought the same about old complete in box games. For a moment they skyrocketed in value and fell just as strong. Maybe it is better to stick with silver and gold.

If it is cheap to begin with then get the better brand. That is, if the better brand doesn’t come at an unreasonably higher price. But whenever the better thing only raises the price by a few bucks then get that one. What is five dollars worth anyways?

For the things you need the most, always stay ahead on their supply. Three is a good number. Three is having two spares.

Always buy the things that add to the quality of your life.

The End. Thank you reader.

About my other books:

First let me say: all of my books are free and in the public domain. Naturally you have to pay for the printed books. Even those are free when it comes to me because they are set at zero revenue. I want the prices to be as cheap as possible. As public domain books do what you want to with them. I only care about them being used, read, and shared.

I have written books on entirely different topics. I sometimes enjoy writing books containing all new video game ideas and video game making philosophy such as with my Game Maker’s Bible.

Sometimes I make notebook books. That is, books that were hand written in a notebook and scanned in. Those are fun. I use stickers, a spirograph set, stencils, color pens and things like that. There is my “Lucifer’s Notebook” series of books.

There is the Bible of Mother Aeon that you would have to read to see what it is about.

I have written books about five “imaginary” planets. Far away worlds. The worlds of Pippy, Link, Ler, Sefra, Orion, and the unmentionable Romona.

I have written things both about Satanism and my Gray Sided religion of Christian Satanism. I have also gone off into another topic or two.

My books can be found on Google Play, Smashwords, Archive.org, Free-Ebooks.net, Scribd, Amazon, Ebay, and other places. I have written nearly 60 books.

They are found under my names: Lucifer White, Lucifer Jeremy White, Lucifer Damuel  White, Lucifer Jeremy Damuel White, Adam J. Capps, and Adam Jeremy Capps. All free as ebook downloads and from sites you can trust.

My Other Books:

Christian Satanism And The Herald Of Satanic Waters

Christian Satanism And Christian Satanic Doctrine

Becoming A Christian Satanist And A Map For A Christian Satanist

Mastering Christian Satanism And The Gray Book Of Satanic Christianity

The Christian Satanic Bible

Another Christian Satanic Bible

My Antichrist Game Or Movie

The Satanic Book And Satanic Living

Satanic Poems 1-30

Branches Of The Satanic Tree

Lessons Of Demonic Magic

The Bible Of Steel

The Bible Of Mother Aeon

Christian Satanic Books 1-5

Godism and Crazyism (series)

Lucifer’s Books Of Inventions And Ideas (series)

Books Of The Five Planets (series)

The Game Maker’s Bible

The New Video Game Idea Book

The Christian Satanic Book: An Introduction To Christian Satanism

Lucifer’s Notebooks (series)

The Christian Satanist

Lucifer’s Satanic Bible

Lucifer’s Satanic Bible: Expanded Hardcover Edition

Making A Great Video Game

Introduction To The Five Planets

Christianity, Satanism, And Christian Satanism

Alien Messages For A Christian Satanist

Book Of The Satanist

New Video Game Ideas

Lucifer’s Great Book

Lucifer’s Light, Dark, And Gray Sided Book

Notebook Of New Video Game Ideas

And now: The Luciferian Book.

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