21 levels of Self-Deception: THIRD EDITION by Tom Wallace - HTML preview

T W E N T Y - O N E L E V E L S

ourselves of the problems we perceive — because the ‘problems’ are often not real problems, just our attitudes towards our circumstances and towards other people. Watching and waiting seem like the best recourse, given the uncertainties in our knowledge and the tendency for our minds to try to rule us in all things. Watching and waiting will let us see, over time, the true nature of ourselves.

What is it that we watch for? Signs of change in ourselves — what annoys us, what pleases us. When do we feel at peace? When do we feel frustrated or impatient?

What is it that we wait for? The important thing, as suggested above, is not to try to instigate change within ourselves. If we try to fix things, this will often be by the ‘head’ not the ‘heart’. So the waiting is about the head catching up with the heart. Then change will happen naturally and not be forced. I’m suggesting this will yield better results!

All this is contrary to our normal mode of living. There is normally a striving to hang on to a sense of self, to ego and to our view of our own identity. The alternative is mostly about doing nothing, or very little, in trying to bring about ‘solutions’. But doing nothing is often extremely difficult. So, going with ‘letting go’, ‘surrender’ and ‘acceptance’ is of course a tough call to make. Lip-service may be paid to the idea of ‘letting go’, but part of us yearns to stick with a story that is easier to live with. Surrender and acceptance call on us to be prepared to change our story, to back down and sometimes to

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