

Chubby Checker was imploring everyone to get down and do The Twist. They had the poorest choice of music in the islands. I was just starting to doze off when the news announcer began babbling about the President of the United States getting caught in a sexual dalliance with an intern.
I sat up on my beach mat and dug a Red Stripe out of the cooler and looked down the deserted beach for my wife. There she was! Buck naked, playing in the surf with our dog, Mongol. He was going crazy. Running around in circles and dashing back into the surf.
I pulled another beer out for her and half of a crab meat sandwich for Mongol and headed on down to see what all the excitement was about. I walked slowly down the beach through the surf. Taking my time. I loved the warm water and its therapeutic value. The years had not been kind to my joints and there was nothing I liked to do more than to soak my knees and nuts in warm salt water.
I’m the harbor master on a small island in the Caribbean, and every so often we take a small skiff over to one of the smaller semi-deserted islands a few miles across the bay, so that my wife can work on her all over tan. It’s a job I truly enjoy.
“What’s his problem?” Mongol ran up and jammed his bowling ball like head straight into my crotch. He was a pit bull, but had the temperament of a kitten.
“What do you think? A ray about as big around as a dinner plate. God, he’s a pussy.”
Mongol despised stingrays for some reason and every time he saw one swimming by in the clear tropical water he went nuts.
“Speaking of pussy, I just heard on the radio that the President got caught getting a blow job from a government clerk.” I said laughing.
“That doesn’t surprise me.” She paused and looked out at bay. “I’m sure glad that we don’t live in a place like that anymore.”
“I first I thought I had dozed off and was dreaming it.”
She looked at me with some concern in her eyes.
“You were kind of restless last night. You haven’t been dreaming about that screaming fish again. Have you?”
“No. Not for a long, long time now.”
“Good.” She smiled and ran off down the beach with Mongol hot on her heels. From a distance she almost looked like she was wearing a swimming suit with all those tattoos all over her body. Just like a comic book.
The morning I called, she had answered on the second ring.
She never has told me her real name. Of all people, why should I care? I guess we all have to have our little secrets.