I Woke Next to the Corpse by Edward Drobinski - HTML preview

Page 21

And at about six feet and 220 at that age, Pirozi was quite good at looming, even when he wasn’t trying. Contrast that with short, lightweight Toro, who had just the prior year passed the five foot barrier, and was all of one twenty soaking wet. This was a disaster in the making and I got between them to try to stop it. Pirozi didn’t seem to mind, but Toro, whose usual olive complexion had transformed into a crimson hue, no doubt prompting an envy in the inadequately mimicking Amazonian Scarlet Macaw, told me in no uncertain terms to “mind my own fucking business,” at which point I thought it most practical to

“mind my own fucking business.” Oh well, like a wizened and

I Woke Next to the Corpse Page 22

ineffectual Democrat reformer fraud, I couldn’t be accused of not trying. I shrugged, made the slightest of head shakes, and retreated to a spot unlikely to be embroiled in any sort of action; behind Pirozi.

Brief, sharp, and semi-sharp exchanges continued between the two. The tone cooled, seemingly the wish of Pirozi. It may be giving him too much credit for foresight, but consider that at his size Pirozi’s reputation has nothing to gain from beating diminutive Toro, and much to lose if he doesn’t prevail in a physical fight. Things were getting more copacetic and coming to a conclusion when Pirozi was irrationally compelled to get in one more shot, smiling while saying; “Okay, little man.”

Toro lost it, and started leaping off the ground to punch Pirozi in the noodle over and over. They weren’t easy shots to make as Pirozi’s head was tiny. 99% of his weight was below the neck, and toward his central location. Pirozi’s puss gave birth to a mouse or three and was becoming redder than Toro’s scarlet. He flailed and flailed, ostensibly trying to block punches unsuccessfully, while forgetting to throw any. I can’t remember, but I think it ended when Toro got tired of jumping and smacking Pirozi. I couldn’t help but snicker, and Pirozi noticed and didn’t seem happy with that. I suppose that I was fortunate that pinhead had already exhausted his “fight” quota for the day.

I Woke Next to the Corpse