Its Socks by Edward Drobinski - HTML preview
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Its Socks
Page 55
he merely a foot sheath, or a symbol of dignity in a world unraveling?
After three harrowing days among the undergarments, Argyle took action.
He retained the services of a retired bathrobe named Chambers, now a legal consultant specializing in textile rights. Chambers filed a formal complaint with the Bureau of Domestic Sorting (BDS), citing "gross negligence, emotional distress, and drawer based defamation."
The case of Sock v. Drawer quickly gained traction. Pantyhose picketed. Ties tweeted in solidarity. Even the mismatched sock community; long marginalized, rallied behind Argyle's cause.
In court, a repurposed shoebox, Argyle delivered a stirring testimony; "I was folded against my will. I was mocked by briefs with slogans like 'Hot Stuff' and 'Insert Here.' I ask not for vengeance, but for justice. For dignity. For proper categorization."
The judge; a stern, lint covered cardigan, ruled in Argyle's favor. The household was ordered to implement a new sorting protocol, complete with color coded dividers and a weekly audit.
