Are you sometimes unable to sleep at night, thinking about an uncertain global future? Like that associated with runaway climate change?...or the unfolding menace of the coronavirus?…or four more years of Donald Trump? No? Then you may as well put this book back on the shelf. For those of you remaining, let me introduce myself. My name is Evan, and I'm a lazy ass-hole (a relevant point because it is the vast number of lazy ass-holes on this planet which has certainly contributed to our uncertain global future). But like you, I’m also unable to sleep at night, since I spent a solid decade at university, studying "societal sustainability". And I'm not very optimistic. I did, however, find the two main concepts which can fix our rapidly disintegrating civilization.