The Guide by Thescottishdude - HTML preview

PLEASE NOTE: This is an HTML preview only and some elements such as links or page numbers may be incorrect.
Download the book in PDF, ePub, Kindle for a complete version.

TH E GU IDE

Writing a short story can be a daunting task for a writer, the subject of the story is the first thing he thinks about. One of the most popular choices by way of theme is science fiction. Now that the writer has thought of the theme he has to think of the subject, what will it be about? It being a sci-fi piece the thought of spaceships immediately enters his mind, could aliens be involved as well as humans? Lets stick to what we know, humans. With all this thought of, the writer begins to type the start…

Th e yea r is 3000AD, a n d in t h e P lu t ou s n ebu la a Un it ed Kin gdom St a r bla zer100 r a t t les t h r ou gh t h e a t m osph er e of n ot h in gn ess. A cr ew of fou r m en is a boa rd t h e bla ck, t ria n gle-sh a ped spa cecr a ft . Ca pt a in Kir t – t h e lea der of t h e cr ew – dr essed in h is da r k gr een ju m psu it wit h h is blon de h a ir sh a ved in t o h is h ea d, h is bea dy, blu e eyes sea rch in g t h e va st n ess of spa ce for t h eir t a rget , st a n ds on t h e br idge.

Pausing the writing to think of the rest of the characters, the crew that should accompany Kirt on his adventure, the writer begins to dabble in stereotypes… Th e Ca pt a in is join ed in t h e ligh t-gr ey con t rol r oom by h is 24 yea r-old n a viga t or , J a son Ma cgregor , a fier ce Scot sm a n wit h a pa ssion for bot h t h e ba gpipes, t h a t cou ld be h ea r d dr on in g a wa y, m u ch t o t h e a n ger of th e ot h er crew m em ber s, lon g in t o t h e n igh t , br ea ch in g th e qu iet n ess of spa ce, a n d wh iskey. H e h a d a sh or t br own bea r d t h a t wen t well wit h h is sh ort , br own h a ir .

Thinking that stereotypes would not alone suffice for the story the writer adds in a character that epitomises intelligence and stability…

Lieu t en a n t P et er F a lkla n ds is th e Ca pta in ’s r igh t -h a n d m a n a n d 2n d in com m a n d of t h e r a gged cr ew. P et er h a d gon e t o Un iver sit y, a ch ievin g a degr ee in psych ology, befor e goin g t o spa ce-fligh t crew wh ere h e gr a du a t ed top of h is cla ss. He h a d been ser vin g a s lon g a s Kirt in t h e spa ce feder a t ion n ow, a tot a l of 9 yea r s, bot h of t h em wer e t h e sa m e a ge – 34. Never pron e t o m a kin g a r a sh decision P et er wa s u su a lly t h e sa voir of th e crew in t im es of crisis. A va lu a ble m em ber of t h e crew.

The writer being male and a fan of martial arts movies decides to add a character with kung-fu abilities in order to make the story more appealing to himself…

Bru ce Lu , born a n d r a ised in J a pa n u n t il h e depa rt ed a t t h e a ge of sixt een for Grea t Brita in wh er e h e a t t en ded Ca h ill Un iver sit y a n d gr a du a ted with a n h on ou r s degr ee in Com pu t in g. Br u ce Lu wa s a lwa ys in t er est ed in m a r tia l a r t s a n d st a rt ed st u dyin g t h em “a ddictively” before h e ven t u r ed t o t h e Br itish Isles. H e is t h e t h ir d oldest of t h e cr ew, 28 yea r s old, a n d r espon sible for com pu t er a n d m a ch in e m a in t en a n ce.

Now the story must begin, brainstorming a multitude of possible plots and scenarios the storyteller decides on one and off we go…
Th e St a r bla zer100 is a sm a ll, explor a t ion pu rposes. It s fea t u r es in clu de In t erfa ce (SCH I) t h a t is a ble to t a lk t o t h e u ser s a n d a dvise t h em on cou rse det a ils a n d m ission sta t em en t s. Th e sh ip is equ ipped wit h lim it ed wea pon system s design ed t o wa r d off pir a t es – t win Vu lca n m a gn et n ippy spa cecr a ft bu ilt for Sm a r t Com pu ter H u m a n ca n n on s, t h is is a la r ge dou ble-ba r relled m a ch in egu n pla ced on t h e sh ip’s roof t h a t fir es bu llet s u sin g m a gn et s t o pr opel t h em so th er e is n o r ecoil, a n d lock er m issiles. Th ese types of m issiles rely on a la ser lockin g syst em th a t t h e pilot m u st con t r ol t o gu ide t h e m issiles t o t h eir t a r get , t h ese m issiles a r e jet t ison ed fr om t h e cr a ft befor e ign it in g t o cu t down on t h e resu lt a n t for ces pu sh in g a ga in st t h e cr a ft . Th e St a rbla zer 100 is on ly ca pa ble of ligh t speed level 1,2 a n d 3 – t h ere a re 7 levels of ligh t speed, level 7 bein g t h e closest t o a ct u a l ligh t speed possible.
In t h e silen t con t r ol r oom Ca pt a in Kir t tu rn s t o P et er F a lkla n ds a n d in qu ir es. ‘ Wh a t a re t h e m ission object ives?’
‘ F or got t en a ga in ?’ P et er sh ot ba ck.
‘ Wh en you ’re Ca pt a in you ca n forget a s well, a n d besides I n ever list en ed t o you t h e la st t h r ee t im es wh en you told m e.’ Kir t joked u sin g h is poker fa ce, wh ich wa sn ’t very good a s h e wa s sm ilin g.
‘ Oka y. Ou r m a in object ive is to t a k e r econ n a issa n ce ph ot os of pla n et 44562.678 a n d iden t ify wh a t it is com posed of a n d wit h er it is su it a ble for sm a ll-sca le colon isa t ion .’
‘ Wh a t do t h ey m ea n by sm a ll-sca le t h is t im e?’ Th e n a viga tor , J a son , a sked. ‘ Th e la st t im e t h e gover n m en t sa id “sm a ll-sca le colon isa t ion ” t h ey bu ilt a cit y with a fort y m ile ra dia n ce.’
P et er r olled h is eyes ba ck in h is h ea d. Wa s h e th e on ly on e list en in g in t h e br iefin g room wh en t h is wa s a ll expla in ed? ‘ Th ey in t en d to bu ild a su r veilla n ce ou t post ca pa ble of la u n ch in g sa t ellites t o a ll of t h e 6 ot h er pla n et s in t h is sola r syst em .’
With the entire introduction out of the way the thing that needs focusing on now is the action…
Not join in g in t h e con versa t ion for on ce, in fa ct t h e on ly tim e ever , Br u ce Lu gla n ces a t t h e ra da r scr een n ext t o J a son , wh o isn ’t pa yin g it a n y a t t en tion . On t h e scr een a sm a ll red blob is m ovin g st ea dily towa rds t h em . Th e m ech a n ica l voice of t h e SCH I bu r sts ou t of t h e spea kers, sh a t t er in g t h e con ver sa t ion . ‘ Alert ! Th ere is a Ma rk 5 Lexispla dder on a n in t er cept cou r se. Ch a n ce of t h e Lexispla dder bein g a pir a t e cr a ft 89.3%.’
‘ Oh , gr ea t !’ Kirt excla im ed. ‘ Th a t ’s a ll we n eed, da m n pir a t es.’
‘ Wh a t’s ou r cou r se of a ct ion ?’ P et er a sked of th e Ca pta in .
‘ We’ve got a lock -on , sir .’ J a son a dded wit h a worr ied look.
Ta kin g a m om en t to pon der t h e sit u a tion Ca pta in Kirt m a de h is decision . ‘ Keep t h e lock -on bu t do n ot fir e. Let s see if it ju st pa sses by u s.’
‘ Affir m a t ive.’ J a son con fir m ed h e h a d h ea r d t h e or der.
Th e con t r ol room wa s n ow filled wit h a n a t m osph er e of qu iet pa n ic a n d t en sion you n eeded a ch a in sa w t o cu t . Th ey a ll bega n to br ea t h qu icker th e closer t h e Lexispla dder dot on t h e r a da r got closer t o t h e cen t re of t h e scr een , closer t o t h em . Swea t st a r t ed for m in g like a fin e m ist in t h e room , a ll t h eir eyes beca m e vein ed a n d red, a s if t h ey h a d been pla yin g in a five-h ou r video ga m es m a ra t h on . Still ever closer t h e Lexispla dder ca m e, every blip of t h e r a da r t h a t sou n ded m ea n t it wa s th a t bit closer .
Wh en t h e ot h er cr a ft wa s ba r ely a kilom etr e a wa y t h e Ca pt a in a sked a qu est ion of h is cr ew. ‘ H a ve we st ill got t h em on a lockon ?’
Br u ce Lu spoke for t h e ot h ers. ‘ Yes, sir.’
‘ Oka y, t h en . S en d a m essa ge t o t h e Lexispla dder requ est in g a visu a l com m u n ica t ion .’
Not a wor d wa s sa id, t h ey ju st wen t a bou t t h e t a sk. It t ook on ly a few secon ds a n d t h e m on it or in fron t of Kir t wa s lit u p wit h t h e fa ce of t h e, possible pir a t e, sh ip com m a n der . Th e sh ip com m a n der ’s fa ce looked ba t t er ed a n d dir t y, fu ll of grea se a n d m ot or oil. He h a d h is h a ir sh a ved com plet ely off, wh a t colou r it wa s n o on e cou ld h a ve gu essed. His du ll, a n d sligh t ly st on ed, gla zed over gr ey eyes looked in h ospit a ble. Ca pt a in Kir t spoke t h e fir st wor ds. ‘ I a m t h e Ca pt a in of t h e St a r bla zer 100 t h a t you seem t o be on a collision cou r se wit h , I a sk you t o divert you r cou r se t o a void collision .’
‘ Not collision .’ Th e Com m a n der st a t ed.
‘ Wh a t?’ Kir t a sked, bewilder ed by t h e r eply.
Wa t ch in g t h e crew of t h e St a rbla zer 100 wit h h u n t er ’s eyes th e Com m a n der ela bor a t ed on h is pr eviou s st a t em en t. ‘ Not collision , boa rdin g.’ He let off a glim m er of a sm ile. Th e com pu ter ter m in a ls in t h e Sta rbla zer con t r ol r oom r a n g lou dly a n d r ed ligh ts fla sh ed.
With a fa ce dr en ch ed in gloom J a son report ed. ‘ Sir, t h ey h a ve a lock-on on u s.’
F ocu sin g on th e m on it or Kirt ga ve a dvice t o th e pir a t e com m a n der ; it wa s a pira t e sh ip, n o dou bt a bou t t h a t . ‘ Look, we h a ve a lock-on on you r sh ip. If you do n ot diver t you r cou r se we will be for ced t o fire on you .’
Alt h ou gh t h e tim e bet ween t h e Ca pta in ’s speech a n d t h e pir a t es com m a n der ’s reply wa s on ly secon ds t o t h e crew it seem ed like h ou r s. ‘ We a lso h a ve a lock-on on you r sh ip, we h a ve a bet ter -equ ipped sh ip for a figh t t h a n you do. We cou ld t a ke a dir ect h it fr om on e of you r m issiles, we’r e fa st er t h a n you a n d I dou bt you cou ld t a k e a dir ect h it fr om u s.’ Th e com m a n der wa s gleefu l, n ea rly la u gh in g a t t h e feeble Sta rbla zer 100 in com pa r ison t o h is sh ip.
‘ You m a y be a ble to t a ke a dir ect h it fr om u s bu t you ca n ’t ta ke m or e t h a n on e. J u st t o let you kn ow, we’ll be firin g m issiles t h r ee a t a tim e.’ Th e ca pta in r espon ded. J a son n ot ed t h is a n d r econ figu red t h e sh ip to fir e t h r ee m issiles a t a t im e.
Now that the tension has been built up it’s time for the action, and just to let you know this short story has a built in scare defuse device. The scare defuse device lets you know what will happen in advance so that you need not get worried about the outcome. Both ships will survive the encounter but one of the Starblazer crew will die…
Th e m om en t bet ween t h e t wo sh ip lea ders got even m ore h ea t ed a s t h e r a da r con firm ed t h a t t h e Lexispla dder h a d fir ed a m issile a t th e St a r bla zer. P et er in for m ed t h e ca pt a in of t h e developm en t in h u sh ed drea d. ‘ Kir t , we h a ve a m issile la u n ch ed.’
‘ F ir e a t h r ee rou n d locker m issile bu r st , t a ke eva sive m ea su r es.’
Tu rn in g a r ou n d P eter sh ou ted. ‘ You h ea rd t h e m a n !’ Th e th ree m issiles wer e fir ed a n d eva sive a ct ion ta ken , wh ich con sist ed of t h e sh ip com plet in g a 90 degree tu rn a n d sh oot in g off a t top speed. Th e m issiles wer e st ill ga in in g on t h em . Ch a ff wa s la u n ch ed a n d lu ckily t h e m issiles wen t a ft er th e ch a ff ca psu les a n d blew t h em u p, lett in g t h e Sta rbla zer esca pe. However, th e en em y sh ip h a d a lso u sed sim ila r t a ctics a n d h a d a voided a ll t h r ee m issiles fired a t it .
Ba ck a t t h e con tr ol scr een t h e t wo lea der s wen t ba ck t o th eir fa ce off. ‘ Oh , I see t h er e is a lit t le bit of figh t in you .’ Th e P ir a t e Com m a n der a n n ou n ced.
‘ Yes, t h ere is. I su ggest you lea ve m y sh ip a lon e; we will n ot m iss a secon d t im e.’
Now the writer adds in a little event that was completely unexpected by the reader, to add a shaky and unpredictable atmosphere to the story…
Am id a ll t h e excitem en t P et er F a lkla n ds, t h e secon d in com m a n d, got ext r em ely wou n d u p. H e bega n t o h iss, glow brigh t ly a n d th en exploded.
Told you someone would die.
Th is ca m e qu ite u n expect edly t o t h e cr ew; in st a n t a n eou s h u m a n com bu st ion h a d n ever befor e been wit n essed by a n y of th em . Th ey h a d h ea r d a bou t it on t h e x-files, n ow on it ’s 986 ser ies.
Sta n din g in fr on t of t h e m on it or t h e Ca pt a in t ried t o look com m a n din g, despit e t h e fa ct h e h a d lit t le bit s of P et er spla t t er a ll over h is ba ck. He didn ’t m a n a ge t o pu ll it off. Th e pir a t e com m a n der la u gh ed h ea r t edly a n d fired off t wo m ore m issiles. ‘ Sir, th er e’s t wo m ore m issile locked-on t o u s a n d deployed!’ Bru ce Lu sh ou t ed.
By the way, the built in scare control device malfunctioned earlier on. When it said that both ships would be fine, it meant that they both would become stardust, sorry for any inconvenience this has caused you. To make a customer complaint please send an e-mail to scare_complaints@c4.com…
‘ F ir e off a t h r ee r ou n d locker m issile bu r st ! Sh a ke th em off of u s!’
Aft er pu n ch in g t h e com m a n d in t o t h e com pu t er for eva sive a ction J a son r epor t ed. ‘ Sir ou r en gin e h a s br oken down , we’ve lost m ovem en t .’ Th e Lexispla dder h a d been exper ien cin g sim ila r pr oblem s a n d ju st a s J a son fin ish ed h is sen t en ce bot h sh ips exploded a s t h e m issiles im pa ct ed on th em . Th ey wer e n ow officia lly st a r du st .
The writer finishes off his story and then yawns, bleary eyed he grabs a can of coke, switches off his computer and goes to bed.

TH E E N D

 

You may also like...

  • Three Comedies
    Three Comedies Humor Classics by Bjornstjerne Bjornson
    Three Comedies
    Three Comedies

    Reads:
    7102

    Pages:
    163

    Published:
    Aug 2010

    Included in this FREE e-book are three comedies by Norwegian Playwright, Bjornstjerne Bjornson: A Gauntlet; Leonarda; and The Newly-Married Couple. Download i...

    Formats: PDF, Epub, Kindle, TXT

  • The Well of the Saints
    The Well of the Saints Humor Classics by John M. Synge
    The Well of the Saints
    The Well of the Saints

    Reads:
    2864

    Pages:
    39

    Published:
    Aug 2010

    A three-act comedy by Irish playwright J.M. Synge, revolving around a couple of blind beggars who were mislead about their appearance by the townspeople in ru...

    Formats: PDF, Epub, Kindle, TXT

  • The Poetaster
    The Poetaster Humor Classics by Ben Jonson
    The Poetaster
    The Poetaster

    Reads:
    5729

    Pages:
    162

    Published:
    Aug 2010

    A comical satire by English poet, playwright, and competitor to William Shakespeare, Ben Jonson. Download it today!

    Formats: PDF, Epub, Kindle, TXT

  • The Old Bachelor
    The Old Bachelor Humor Classics by William Congreve
    The Old Bachelor
    The Old Bachelor

    Reads:
    4392

    Pages:
    80

    Published:
    Aug 2010

    The comical first play by English dramatist and master of pure comedy, William Congreve. Download it today!

    Formats: PDF, Epub, Kindle, TXT