Making Your Long Distance Relationship Work by Michelle and Frank - HTML preview

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Respect your partner

From responding to people’s questions, we’ve realized that many people aren’t showing their partner as much respect as they should be. A lot of times all we hear is, “me, me, me, me…” when it comes to people describing how they feel when their relationship is suffering. Often times, the feelings of their partner are overlooked, and they only are thinking about themselves.

They expect their partner to fulfill their every need and feel that it is their right. Now listen, your partner is only human they can only do so much and it would be impossible for them to meet your every expectation. They have lives outside of your relationship, just as you do, or should. When you feel you have been wronged in some way in your relationship, have an open mind –try to see things from your partner’s point of view. How would you feel if you were on the other side of the issue? You may come to realize that you may react or do the same as them, or at least you will be able to understand why they react they way they do.

Let me give an example of a common issue, just to put this into context. Many times people will feel that their boyfriend or girlfriend does not care about them as much as they used to. This could be for various reasons, but usually they will begin to feel this way if their boyfriend/girlfriend stops doing nice things for them, or even when their phone conversations become limited or short and their boyfriend/girlfriend doesn’t talk to them as much anymore, or even doesn’t want to.

In this situation, people will feel that their boyfriend/girlfriend is the culprit. They are the ones that do not want to talk; they are the ones that stopped doing special things. Now try to see things from their perspective. Maybe they have become bogged down by something going on in their lives, and they don’t have the time they used to. Maybe they feel there is not much to talk about and when they do get on the phone with you, you yourself don’t have much to say. Maybe they stopped doing special things, because you don’t hardly ever return the favor.

The point I am trying to make with this example is these that things can’t be overlooked. Always take into consideration your partner’s feelings and try to understand where they are coming from before you take any action. You need to respect their their feelings before you attack them with words such as, “You don’t care about me anymore.” That can really hurt. So think about them next time and respect their feelings, by recognizing them and trying to do something about it, instead of expecting them to. I think you’ll start to see them reciprocating the respect you give them.

That said…