How to Marry a Psychopath by Fruitloopmum - HTML preview

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Do mobile phones fry your brain?

I was in the middle of writing a crucial chapter of my soon to be best-seller when the phone rang. It was my dearest friend in the middle of a crisis calling from her mobile. She needed my help, now, immediately.

"I've lost my bloody car keys somewhere! I'm stranded in the village. Can you come and get me?"

Now, my friend is pretty level-headed and has dug me out of many a sticky

situation in the past. I launched into the usual questions Are the keys in the car? Have you re-traced your steps? Would you have heard them drop? Have you checked inside the lining of your expensive handbag?

She started to get exasperated with me.

"I'm walking around the village now, (background noise as she enters yet another shop) excuse me, yes I do know that I came in here ten minutes ago, but has anyone handed in my car keys? No, ok. Look you'll have to come and get me"

I suggest that she just does one more sweep of the village shops before I launch into rescue mode. Her exasperation and stress reach boiling point.

"For fuck sake! "

"What?"

" Well now I've gone and lost my mobile phoneā€¯

Case proven.