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chair and continued, “Don Miguel Ruiz comes from a long line of Toltec

healers and teachers. Although his family anticipated that he would continue

on with the family’s centuries-old legacy, Don Miguel followed a different path and went to medical school and became a surgeon. After a near-death car

accident, Don Miguel switched gears and now devotes his life to sharing the

Toltec wisdom. In the interest of teaching mankind a path to personal

freedom and not being controlled by your environment, he wrote his first

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highlights, I highly recommend that you get the book and study it in depth.”

From the table next to him he picked up the book and held it up to

show me, then opened it. “The first Agreement is BE IMPECCABLE WITH

YOUR WORD.” He looked up from the book and said, “… Which means to

speak with integrity. This sounds somewhat simple, but it is actually very,

very powerful. Depending on how you use it, your words can change lives for

the better which is demonstrated by people like Lao Tzu, Socrates and Jesus

or they can destroy lives which is demonstrated by Hitler, Stalin and Saddam

Hussein. If you do what you say, you can create a heaven on earth. If you

spend your time gossiping or not being true to your word, you render your

speech weak and powerless.” He took a sip of tea and looked closely at me.

“Is this making any sense?”

“Yes, I replied. “I get it. If we don’t have our word we don’t have much at

all.”

“Good!” Myron smiled and returned to the book. “The second agreement is

DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY.” He stops to think for a moment, looks

at me and says, “The reality is that whatever someone says or does to you, it

has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. When you

become immune to the opinion of others, you become very powerful and

enjoy a level of independence enjoyed by few. Just look back on your life and

see how often your words and actions were based upon how others would

perceive them. Now think how your life would be if you had the freedom to

act independently and didn’t take anything personally, would that improve

your life?”

That was a powerful question and I had to stop and think about my

answer. “Every time I was ever involved in a confrontation whether it was

verbal or otherwise, was a result of my reacting to what the other person said or did.”

“Excellent, that’s getting it!” He again read from the book, “The third

agreement is DON’T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS.” He slowly put down the book and

looked at me. “Most people spend their entire lives making assumptions of

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what others say and do based upon their personal view of the world, not how

the world really is. So the vast majority of what we believe to be true is

false. By asking clarifying questions and not making assumptions, you can

get to the actual truth as opposed to your version of it. With this one agreement, you can completely transform your life. Are you ready to give it a

try?”

“I believe so.” I reconsidered my words, “Yes, I’m ready.”

Myron nodded affirmatively then went back to the book. “The fourth

and last agreement is ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST.” He smiled, closed the book

and looked at me once more. “By following this agreement you will

experience life with a positive intensity which will produce a high self esteem level and a lot of self fulfillment. By doing your best, which will vary,

depending upon how you feel, you will be highly productive while at the

same time being good to yourself. The main idea behind doing your best is

that your actions are motivated by self love and respect – not for some

reward at the end. Actions based upon rewards are hollow and not truly

enjoyed.” He placed the book back on the table and picked up his tea and

sipped. “What do you think of the Four Agreements?”

“I love them. If I would have incorporated them into my life prior to

yesterday, the outcome of my day would have been entirely different. Up

until now, I never even considered the concept of personal freedom and the

tremendous impact it would have for me and every person in my life.”

“Well Robert, today is your lucky day. In addition to the Four

Agreements, I’m going to show you an exercise which will give you even more personal freedom.”

“What have I done to deserve all this?” I said jovially.

“Like I said, ‘when the student is ready the teacher or teaching will appear.’

Now I want you to un-button your top button, un-tuck your shirt, loosen your

belt a notch or two and lie down on the floor.”

“Are you kidding me?”

“’Do I look like I’m kidding, let’s go.”

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I followed Myron’s instructions feeling a little bit out of my comfort zone

but then, I had to admit, my entire relationship with him has been about

getting me out of my comfort zone. I proceeded to lie down on the floor.

“OK, now put this glass of water beside you and I’ll give you little

background on Transformational Breathing or TB, which was co-created by Dr.

Judith Kravitz. TB is a unique form of breath work that facilitates the natural healing process for all types of trauma and is beneficial in gaining greater

physical, mental and spiritual health.

It has a number of associated benefits including:

9 Higher energy level

9 Reduces worry and anxiety

9 Enhances the awareness of self-sabotaging patterns

9 Clears past traumas and dramas

9 Relieves depressive and negative emotions

9 Improves self-esteem

In addition to all of this, I do it every day and can personally vouch for the many benefits it has to offer.” “Wow, that’s pretty impressive. Is it painful?”

“Well,” Myron said with a chuckle, “When I first started doing it I was a little concerned about maintaining my pace for forty five minutes.” “Forty five

minutes, are you kidding me?”

“No, and the beauty is, Dr. Kravitz will guide you through the entire

process. So let’s get started.” Myron handed me a pillow for my head and

one for my knees and then a set of head phones and turned on his CD player.

As the music played and I breathed, Myron coached me on breathing deeper

and deeper. Forty five minutes later, I was about as calm as I have ever been

while at the same time feeling rejuvenated. What was weird was it didn’t feel

as if I was doing it for forty-five minutes. It felt more like fifteen or twenty.

And, I felt myself actually looking forward to doing it again.

When I opened my eyes, Myron was peering down at me with that big

smile, “How’d it go, are you gonna live?”

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“Wow that was really something.” “Are you up for doing it again

sometime?” “Absolutely!”

“OK,” He then slipped a piece of paper in my hand with the TB website

scribbled on it. “You better gather up your things and I’ll see you next week.”

Still reeling from my Transformational Breathing experience and

feeling more relaxed than I can imagine, I waived a faint good bye as I made

my way out the door.

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Sharing It

After six weeks of Myron, six weeks of The Science of Getting Rich,

seven days of TB and a comprehensive study of the Four Agreements, I was really ready to rock. My wife, kids and co-workers have all commented on my

calm demeanor and upbeat attitude. What’s really cool is that I’m starting to

work out again and instead of getting up a couple of times a night I’m

sleeping straight through until the alarm goes off.

As I walked through Myron’s door he could tell that things were

working for me. While he poured us some tea and we got comfortable, I could

see by his smile that he was pleased with me and it made me feel a sense of

pride.

“So Robert, how’s life treating you?” He sat back in his chair eager to

hear my response. I felt myself sit up straighter as I raised my chin, “It’s more like how am I treating it. Our work together is really starting to make a huge difference; in my business, with my family and especially in me.

“Excellent, so now what?” “I’m not sure I understand what you

mean,” I said as I leaned back into the sofa.

“Well, what are you going to do with all of this new found knowledge?”

Myron took a slow sip of his tea and then looked at me probingly.

My confidence was suddenly evaporating as I tried to determine an

appropriate response. “I plan to just keep improving and getting better.”

“Isn’t your Worthy Ideal to make a positive difference and be of

service to as many people as possible before you die?”

“Yes.” “’Then share it.” “What do you mean, share it?” “Well, in addition to your immediate family, don’t you have over two hundred people in your

company?” “Yes.”

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“What would be the impact to your company if your employees had the

same knowledge and experiences you’ve had over the last seven weeks?”

“That would be a dream come true.” “Would you like for that to happen?”

“Absolutely, but do you actually have the bandwidth to implement

such changes in my company?” After all, this little guy was in his late

nineties and two hundred people would be extremely taxing on anyone let

alone a person of Myron’s age.

“No, nor would I want to.” He took another sip of tea. “That’s your

job.” I practically fell off the sofa and spilled my tea. “Me?” I said

incredulously. “I wouldn’t know where to start.”

“Well then, let’s start with you,” as he handed me a napkin and refilled

my cup. “Business is essentially about profitability and a strong bottom line

– that is a given. However, building a sustainable, growing and profitable

business requires much more than just financial acumen and having people

turning out the work. Business leaders like yourself are faced with constant

and unrelenting pressures. These pressures come from a wide array of

sources including maintaining market share, interpersonal, cross cultural

governance and maintaining profitability just to name a few. There’s no time

for developing your people… right?...Wrong!” He set the teapot down and

held his cup as if getting ready to sip.

“Great leaders are constantly looking for newer and better ways to

empower and leverage the passion of their employees. They know that

irrespective of the circumstances, increasing the return on investment of

their human capital can make a substantial difference in their bottom line profits over and above the products and services they sell.”

“I never looked at it that way.” “Well, I would suggest that you start.

But don’t feel bad because very few leaders have this empowered perspective and consequently struggle because of it. Studies have shown that highly

motivated employees are up to 127% more productive than your average

employees in highly complex jobs. I would also suggest that motivated

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would even go so far as to say that motivated employees are more cost

conscious and have less sick days. That all adds up to a lot at the end of the year.” He takes a sip of tea and continues.

“Research has found on average that 70% of the employees are

looking for more meaning in their work. That means that only 30% are

relatively happy in their job. To me that says that there is a lot of

underutilized human capital in the workplace. It makes sense to me Robert,

that if you want to break away from the pack of the unempowered to the empowered, you had better implement modalities that create passion in your employees.”

I felt a rush of energy; a wonderful feeling of lightness slowly flowed

through me as I began playing “what if” scenarios in my imagination. I knew

that a change of this manner was possible if I wanted it to be so and I was

excited about the possibilities as Myron continued to elaborate.

“And I’m not talking about a short lived blip of motivation typically

provided by books, tapes or an off-site meeting at the beach. The passion

I’m referring to is a conscious choice to live a life of meaning where at the end of the day you know you have made a contribution, not only to your own life

but in the lives of your employees and customers. How does that hold up to

your Worthy Ideal?”

“It’s dead on.” I looked at him and then down to my cup, “But I have

no idea where to begin.” “Again, Robert, it all starts with you. First you

must know how to feel.” “Feel what?” I asked, slightly frustrated.

“If you have to ask then you better really take a deep breath, step

outside the vortex of normality, and step into the world of leadership from the heart. Feeling is another way of listening to that small voice within. That voice, or as I like to call it, the ‘Gollum,’ a character in the Lord of the Rings, is the balance between good and evil, right and wrong. It’s the voice that most people don’t listen to, the voice that gives you that ‘gut feeling.’And when

you follow this voice, you take ownership and responsibility for every

thought, decision and action that arises both personally and professionally.”

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“You mean I can’t blame other people, I can’t delegate the fallout?” I said

jokingly.

“The answer is that great leaders, passionate leaders, take full

responsibility for the outcome of their leadership. Great leaders constantly

interact with their employees. They get out from behind their desks, and ivory towers and interact with those who are in the trenches.”

“But I’m constantly asking my people about what’s going on.”

“No one is ever going to tell you the truth if you ask them how things are going. But if you’re intermingling with your employees directly, you’ll be able to see the truth first hand.”

“I guess I see what you mean. To be honest, maybe I didn’t really want to

know the truth. I just wanted to hear that everything was working well.”

“If you want to be a great leader, you must learn to build trust.

Francois De La Rochefoucauld once wrote, ‘The trust that we put in ourselves

makes us feel trust in others.’ To build true and meaningful trust you must

first learn to trust yourself, then and only then will others learn to break down the barriers of skepticism and trust you.”

“Wow, I never looked at it that way. You know, this is all a little

overwhelming but I know I can do it. Where do I start?”

“Robert, a change in your company starts with you. The desire to

change is paramount due to the intestinal fortitude you’ll need in order to

withstand the many blows from critics who’ll ridicule and try to put you

down. Remember though, the majority are only willing to make a difference if

it benefits them and their bank accounts. Working to the contrary is the stuff from which legends rise. Just ask yourself, how do I want to be remembered,

what legacy do I wish to leave and how do I want to feel when I look back on

my life at the end of it all?”

Myron picked up a hand written piece of paper next to the teapot. “The

following is a general checklist I put together for beginning your journey of

becoming a passionate, heart-based leader,” as he read aloud:

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Take a good look at yourself – the good the bad and the ugly.

Understand and learn from the many benefits and lessons that lay within any

pain, hurt or suppressed experience. An executive coach or mentor can be of

tremendous help in this self evaluation process. Promote personal

responsibility and ownership within your company. Always starting with you

first. Pursue an impactful purpose for your organization that results in a

positive sustainable diference within the company while still creating a strong bottom line.

Promote personal growth, organizational leadership development and

identify, nurture, recognize and reward your people and emerging leaders

and those people with hidden talents.

Open up the positive feedback channels within your company, your family

and your friends.

He then handed me the paper and said, “Now, do a quick mental audit of

how many of the above steps you are actively planning, encouraging and

pursuing within your company?”

I looked at the page and quickly accessed it. “I’m embarrassed to say that

I’m not doing any of these things. Up until now, I thought I had a pretty

good company.”

“And Robert, I’m sure you do, but how would you like to have a world

class company that really makes a contribution?” “I’d love it.”

“Well it all starts with a single thought that develops into an idea that

transforms into a plan that gives birth to a proposal that with care and

commitment will mature into a fully blown embraceable cultural shift.”

“Wow, that was nicely stated,” I said in awe.

“Now Robert, the question is, do you think you have what it takes? Is

your company ready for such an incredible challenge? What have you got to

lose… your job? Forget about the college tuitions, the mortgage and all of

your other financial responsibilities just for a moment. When you have a

Worthy Ideal that is warmly embraced and your primary aim is to be ‘of

service’ you won’t have to worry about where the money comes from, it will

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just manifest and flow to support you on your leadership journey.”

“Thanks to you, I believe that I am ready, Myron. In fact, I can’t wait

to begin.” “That’s what I want to hear. You have a lot of information to

assimilate so let’s call it a day. Next week we’ll pick up where we left off.”

As Myron walked me to the door I felt that a new page was turning in

the evolution of my company and more importantly, my life.

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Empowering Others

“Good morning Myron, how’s it going today?” I said as I approached

his front porch. Myron sat on an antique rocker, smiling back at me.

“Robert, it’s always going the same. In fact, that reminds me of a

story my grandfather used to tell me when I was a young boy. Several

thousand years ago in Lebanon, there lived a wise man by the name of Useff

who, throughout his life was always happy. It didn’t matter if he had enough to eat, sufficient clothes to keep him warm or even a place to sleep, he was

happy. People in the town would always ask him why he was always so happy

but he would never tell them. On the last day of his life with just minutes to live, one of his oldest and dearest friends knelt down beside his bed and

whispered in his ear, ‘Useff, before you leave this earth you must share with

me your secret of how you have remained so happy all these years.’ With a

smile, Useff looked up at his friend and told him that each day when he

would awaken, God would ask him, ‘Useff, today you can be happy or you

can be sad, which will it be?’ And very calmly, Useff told his friend that he

always chose to be happy.”

“That’s a great story. I guess, all in all it’s really as simple as that,” I

admitted. Myron looked inquisitively at me and asked, “So Robert, how are

you doing today?”

“Myron, I’m here with you on this beautiful, sunny Saturday, how else

could I possibly be but excellent?” “On that note,” and a slight chuckle

Myron replied, “Then let’s go to work.”

He then rose smoothly from the chair and ushered me into the house. “Today

I would like to discuss a critical step in our work which is the process of

empowering others.”

I took my traditional place on the sofa as Myron poured us both a cup

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of tea. He then walked to his book case and began searching the shelves as I

have watched him do so many times before. As I looked at him, I was

overcome by a feeling of gratefulness for having the opportunity to study

with such a learned man. Myron, with all of his foibles truly set a great

example of how to live a quality life.

One of his trademark pirate laughs underscored the fact that he had

found what he was looking for. With an old leather-bound book in hand he

seemed to bounce back across the room, sat down, flipped it open and