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Chapter 14
23 September.--Jonathan is better after a bad night. I am so glad that he has plenty of
work to do, for that keeps his mind off the terrible things, and oh, I am rejoiced that he is
not now weighed down with the responsibility of his new position. I knew he would be
true to himself, and now how proud I am to see my Jonathan rising to the height of his
advancement and keeping pace in all ways with the duties that come upon him. He will
be away all day till late, for he said he could not lunch at home. My household work is
done, so I shall take his foreign journal, and lock myself up in my room and read it.
24 September.--I hadn't the heart to write last night, that terrible record of Jonathan's
upset me so. Poor dear! How he must have suffered, whether it be true or only
imagination. I wonder if there is any truth in it at all. Did he get his brain fever, and then
write all those terrible things, or had he some cause for it all? I suppose I shall never
know, for I dare not open the subject to him. And yet that man we saw yesterday! He
seemed quite certain of him, poor fellow! I suppose it was the funeral upset him and
sent his mind back on some train of thought.
He believes it all himself. I remember how on our wedding day he said "Unless some
solemn duty come upon me to go back to the bitter hours, asleep or awake, mad or
sane. . ." There seems to be through it all some thread of continuity. That fearful Count
was coming to London. If it should be, and he came to London, with its teeming millions.
. .There may be a solemn duty, and if it come we must not shrink from it. I shall be
prepared. I shall get my typewriter this very hour and begin transcribing. Then we shall
be ready for other eyes if required. And if it be wanted, then, perhaps, if I am ready,
poor Jonathan may not be upset, for I can speak for him and never let him be troubled
or worried with it at all. If ever Jonathan quite gets over the nervousness he may want to
tell me of it all, and I can ask him questions and find out things, and see how I may
comfort him.
24 September
"Dear Madam,
"I pray you to pardon my writing, in that I am so far friend as that I sent to you sad news
of Miss Lucy Westenra's death. By the kindness of Lord Godalming, I am empowered to
read her letters and papers, for I am deeply concerned about certain matters vitally
important. In them I find some letters from you, which show how great friends you were
and how you love her. Oh, Madam Mina, by that love, I implore you, help me. It is for
others' good that I ask, to redress great wrong, and to lift much and terrible troubles,
that may be more great than you can know. May it be that I see you? You can trust me.
I am friend of Dr. John Seward and of Lord Godalming (that was Arthur of Miss Lucy). I