Cautionary Tales HTML version

So good in fact, he'd say it twice:
"Don't be like Henry, be like me,
Eat curly cabbage for your tea,
To be like me and stay alive,
Eat up your greens, and you'll survive".
back to top
Fatty Folds
Cousin Mildred Constance Phipps,
Grew so fat when she ate chips,
That people flocked from oh so and far,
To see a woman so bizarre.
Her folds of fat rolled down the bed,
And swallowed up poor uncle Fred,
Who'd come to gawp at his niece Phipps,
But disappeared into her hips.
His cries and moans they came and went,
Until he energy was spent,
And he could wail and weep no more,
A folded hanky in a drawer.
So learn this lesson, learn it true,
To not end up all black and blue,
Or eaten by some fleshy hips,
Keep well away from Mildred Phipps.
back to top
Old farmer Weck,
Had such a fat neck,
That his snores,
They sounded like thunder.
They rattled the panes,
They cleared all the drains,
And blew his small cottage asunder.
back to top
Willie's temper was so short,
He'd snap and snort and cuss,
When upset, he'd really shout,
Cause such a bloody fuss.