Amock Comedy Compendium HTML version

Honda are to use their innovative Asimo robots as a door-to-door salesmen.
"This is an ideal function for the machine," said spokesman Yoshiro
Tanaka, "as the mental capacity of the average salesman is achievable in
the limited capacity we are able to insert into the mechanism."
The robots will be dropped off in a suburban area and programmed to visit
every house. The product range and sales-pitch will also be pre-
programmed with sub-programmes available for sales resistance."
"I think we've thought of everything," added Tanaka, "If the customer says
they can't afford the item, Asimo will offer them credit facilities. If they say
they don't need it, Asimo will show them how it will benefit their lives. It all
makes perfect sense, especially for the company selling the products as
Asimo does not expect any commission payments. This can be translated
as an extra profit for the company or a lower price for the customer"
The Asimo can be used across the planet as it can have different language
and cultural modules installed to suit its environment.
Plans to include the normal salesman's perk involving housewives, have been shelved for the moment.
"Mechanically it would be simple," concluded Tanaka, "But there would be no emotional fulfilment for the
housewife. So, coffee drinking is out."