Amock Comedy Compendium HTML version
SEX-CHANGE WEEKENDS ARE HERE
Getting in touch with your feminine side could be a weekend thing with news that scientists at
the San Francisco Institute for the Sexually Confused have created a drug which allows
temporary sex-changes. The drug works by suppressing the
body's natural hormones, allowing those of the opposite
sex, which are always present, to emerge. The effect lasts
for forty eight hours.
One enthusiastic user is Bob Nasty of London, who has
been using the drug, called Mixiton, for several months.
"It's a stress-relief thing for me," he told this reporter.
"I pop the tab on a Friday evening and become Jill for the
weekend. This allows me to wears bras and have men kiss
me, which is something I miss since giving up rugby playing
due to a groin injury. It's opened up a whole new area for
Bob/Jill (pictured) went on to say, "I have a girlfriend,
Alice, during the week and she becomes Alex at the
weekend, but I don't see much of him as he tends to go out
with his mates to watch a football match and get drunk. I'm
really looking forward to a weekend when she doesn't take Mixitonl and we can have a girly
Alice said, "Bob used to love getting into my pants, and now he really does. He's always
borrowing my stuff."
ALIENS ARE PERVERTS
The Pentagon has finally admitted the existence of UFOs but say they do not pose a threat
to Earth as their alien occupants are
merely voyeurs with a
fascination for human sexual
General Butch Hansen said, "The
aliens are just dirty little
buggers and we have no cause to
fear them as long as they
can get their kicks from watching
people at it."
The General added that the
military had gleaned this
information from an alien they were
holding at the notorious Area 51.
"We had a hell of a time getting the little guy to talk, and he finally only opened up when one
of our female lieutenants showed him her bra. Their technology and weapons are far superior to
ours but we can keep them happy by not closing our curtains. Let them look, I say."