10 Sure Shot Ways to Get Your Ex Back for Good by Jez Rourke-Pilott - HTML preview
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Sure shot ways
To get your Ex Back
Within one week
1. Reverse your Break up in 7 Days ………………..………................ 3
2. 10 Ways to get back your Ex within 1 week ………….….......... 4
Enhance your Physical Appearance ………………......... 4
Be Independent and Confident ………………….….......... 6
Never underestimate yourself …………………................ 8
Nurture the relationship ………………………................... 10
Be friends with his friends ……………………................... 12
Be sincere in your approach ……………………................. 14
Try to be unique and innovative ………………................ 15
Give Time and work as a team ……………….….............. 16
Understand the psychology …………………….................. 18
2.10. Broaden your Sphere ………………………….…................. 20
3. Authors Note ………………………………………..……........................... 21
Reverse your Break up in 7 Days
Life does not follow any set pattern. There is no rule book to guide a person on its long journey of existence. Follow your heart is the best way to handle the ups and down and various hurdles that come across through a person’s supposedly small life span on this earth.
Be sure of one thing in your life – “Never take anything for granted”.
Everything comes across with a price tag attached to it. You have to make your own place and stamp your existence on this earth vividly.
Be sure of your life’s goal and targets and shoot after them. Don’t be modest. Opportunities never knock at your door twice. You have just this one life to prove yourself (you never know in what form you reappear in your rebirth).
Nobody cares how you achieve your goal, what matters is the end result. If you want something desperately, work on it. Don’t let it go without sweating on it. Give it your hundred percent.
There is no way you can’t achieve your heart’s desire, if you put your whole heart into it. If a person wants something real badly, and put his full effort in achieving it, even the universe helps him in his pursuit of his quest.
It’s a mind game. One has to be fully prepared and confident in one’s own ability.
First, there has to be clarity in mind about one’s wants and desire.
Are you clear in your views about what you are after? Is it just a whim or a true desire? Are you ready to slog for it? If the answer to all the above questions is yes, then, tighten your seat belt and go for it. Your flight is ready to take off.
10 Ways to get back your Ex within 1 week Remember you are into a race against time. One Week is what you need to get your ex back. Plan your strategy carefully and implement it. Best of Luck!!!
1. Enhance your physical appearance Jot down your positive and negative points on a piece of paper.
Work on the negative aspects and flaunt the positive ones.
First, start with your physical appearance. Stand in front of a mirror and appraise yourself from head to toe very critically.
Say, let’s begin with hair. Are they dull, rough and unkempt? Have you had a same hair style for a very long time?
If so, take an appointment from your hair dresser for the earliest possible. Go for a new hair style keeping in mind your boy friend’s liking for short or long hair.
If you think there is nothing wrong with your hairdo, take a step down.
Now, let’s tackle the face. Are you losing out on your freshness and gaiety due to tension? Is your regular glow missing? Where is the sparkle of your eyes that first attracted him to you?
Don’t let go of your mischievous smile. Rush for a facial. Get a spa and massage done. Get yourself rejuvenated. Splurge on yourself. Go for bright, lively lip shades and make-up. Throw away anything dull and somber.
Next comes the clothing part. There is a old saying “God made a man, tailor made a Gentleman”. Clothes can make or break you.
Pamper yourself, go for a new wardrobe. Pick out some smart sexy clothes. They will not only make you look attractive but at the same time will boost up your self confidence. You will feel good from within.
Don’t forget you are out on a killing spree. Nothing is wrong in love and war.
Don’t be demure and shy and go out on a hunt for your man with full force. Make sure when you walk down on the road heads turn. Also ensure, your ex is somewhere around, noticing other men goggle at you.
Men love to possess something other craves for. Believe it or not, they love to show off, as much if not more than as women.
Keep two days aside for your physical transformation and in these two days don’t let your ex have a glimpse of you.
Once you are satisfied that you are looking your best possible, try to go out with your friends preferably a male one, to those common joints, where you are sure your ex boy friend is also bound to be.
Flaunt yourself unashamedly. Flirt around and give a notion of having a good time. At the same time make sure, you do not entirely ignore your ex or go overboard in your act.
That might give him an idea that you are doing all this in a rebound and it might please him further that he still has that hold on you.
Your purpose of all this should be to make him realize what all he is missing by walking out on you. Be a little distant but at the same time be friendly with him, so that he gets the message that he still has the scope of coming back to you.
Don’t scare him off by getting too close to your male friends that might send entirely wrong vibes.
Be graceful and elegant and show off your newly acquired poise. If he approaches you with a desire to meet again, don’t show over enthusiasm, and don’t ever let him feel as if this whole trap had been set up purposely by you with the only intention of entrapping him into it.
A man likes to catch his own prey. The feeling of being hunted down scares them off. Don’t repeat the mistakes that led to this break up at the first place.
When with him don’t compromise with your new looks. Use your new wardrobe and make-up to your full advantage. A man likes to be seen in the company of beautiful and attractive women and there is no dearth of such ladies around. You have a constant competition.
One more important aspect that should be kept in mind is, always behave in a proper manner when out with other men. Don’t give your ex any wrong signals about your character.
Flirting with other men should be well within the limits of a friendship. Don’t give anyone the idea that you are easily available for any Tom, Dick and Harry. Let there be full respect in your relationship once you regain it.
That is the most important ingredient for a long lasting relationship.
So, have a nice time with your new look. There is a definite surety that it is going to catch your boy friend’s attention and bowl him out flat.
2. Be Independent and Confident
After physical appearance comes the emotional and mental part.
Woman are emotional fools, they carry a large baggage with them everywhere which contains rights and wrongs of life.
Leave your heavy suitcases behind for a change, for someone else to look after. Be light headed and move forward in life with an open and clear mind. Be firm and determined in your pursuit. Don’t be aggressive.
Be subtle but single focused. Persistence is the key to success. Don’t give up without a good fight. A battle lost doesn’t necessarily mean lost war.
If you want your boy friend back badly, go after him all armored, and ensure others know of your intentions. Determination always pays.
Be consistent in your approach. Remember you are fighting for what was yours and you want it back. Don’t show your desperation, by being clinging and submissive.
Be independent in your approach. Never should he feel burdened down by having you around him. Being soft, delicate and vulnerable are some good qualities that a women should have, but at the same time confidence in oneself is equally important.
Being always dependent on your man for every big or small problem is the fastest and the surest way of ensuring his reluctance in continuing the relationship on a long term basis.
At first, they all like their girl friends to be feminine and submissive and looking upon them starry eyed.
Men enjoy being asked their opinion regarding their girl friends clothes and accessories. Their full time attention and company boost their egos.
They feel manly with a girl friend tagging along with them and being always there at their beck and call. But over the period of time they start feeling suffocated and chained down when constantly in the company of a naïve, ignorant, empty headed girl friend, who is dependent on them for their every small requirement.
Change your attitude. Be independent and confident. But remember, only confident and not over confident. Try to relieve him from the strain of taking every small decision, help him out with his basic daily needs.
Men will never admit but they are very poor housekeepers. Doing basic daily chores like grocery shopping, bills payment, home cleaning bore them to death. Increase their dependency on you by simplifying and sorting out their everyday routine.
One most common excuse for a break up in almost every relation is the fight over who takes the responsibilities. If that has been the reason in your case, now is the chance to rectify it. It won’t hurt you to take the first step towards reconciliation. Have that much confidence and determination in you to be able to manage things single handedly.
Let him also have that much faith in you. Ask him to give you a week’s time to prove yourself. Show it to him that you can manage things on your own without his interference and that too with perfection. You should not be an added responsibility on him but a company for him, and that too an intelligent one.
Charm him down with your confidence, determination and independence. Just notice, he won’t want to go anywhere away from you. And why should he? He has nothing to lose and everything to gain.
3. Never underestimate yourself
One most basic rule to hold on to your boy friend is, never to underestimate yourself. You alone are not to be blamed for the breakup.
Have faith and trust in your capabilities to make a relationship work. There can be hundred and one reason for why he left you. It’s not necessary it was due to some fault of yours.
There could have been some misunderstanding on his part or else, he might have been, as it is looking out for some excuse to end this
Be strong rock and salvage the situation. Try to bridge the gap that has distanced you for him. Go through the incidences of the past two months.
Make notes of all the issues that have led to a spat amongst you (even the little tiny ones). Note down all the habits of yours that he doesn’t like.
Have you been because of your having low esteem in your own self, over protective? Have your actions been suffocating him in the relationship? Have you in your desperation to hold on to him not being giving him enough space to breath? Does it make you feel insecure even if he looks up to any other girl?
Change yourself. Have faith in your boyfriend and in yourself.
Loosen up a bit. Don’t underestimate your worth.
He won’t run away, if given a little freedom. He is yours to keep.
Don’t show your desperation. Don’t stalk him day and night (it just doesn’t have to be physically, even mentally release him). Value yourself.
How do you expect others to appreciate you when you yourself underrate yourself? Make him aware of what he is losing out on by 11
walking out of this relationship. You can achieve whatever you set your mind on.
Just have faith in yourself. If you really want him back don’t be afraid in using any mode or tool possible in reaching your target. It can be your friend, your family or your common acquaintance. Let them be your voice.
Don’t blow your own trumpet, but let it spread through words of mouth.
If you have enough belief in yourself, others will also go out of the way to support you in your cause. But first and foremost it’s you and only you who can make any real difference in your relationship. For that you must have a specific idea about how and why the things went sour.
Whose fault was it, is very immaterial, and because it’s not an issue of egos what involved here is your heart. If you have to bend down a
little to get back your lost love, let it be.
Confront him directly. Don’t be aggressive, just sit and work out how things can be mended. Talk like adults, don’t cry and cling to him, which would make him run away even further. Never show him your desperation.
There has to be some quality or qualities of yours that attracted him to you in the first place. Focus and highlight on those qualities. Bring his attention to them and subtly make him realize your worth. Don’t be melodramatic but be firm and specific in your approach. You know you can do it.
4. Nurture the relation
Every relationship let it be of mother and child, siblings or friendship, needs nurturing.
Love and care are two basic ingredients to hold on to any relation.
But be careful, always remember, excess of anything is bad. Don’t smother a person with your love.
You can drive a person insane with your constant attention. But at the same time show your boyfriend how much you care for him.
Give attention and importance to his every little whim. Make him feel special in your life. He should constantly get the vibrations of your love for him.
Make him aware of his importance in your life. If he is angry with you or has broken up with you, you can always convey your feelings in various different ways.
Make him realize, that you are missing him and would like to have him back. Leave a door open for him so that he doesn’t have the feeling that he has permanently closed all his future prospects with you, when walking out of your life. Boost his ego to certain extent.
Remember, love knows no limits and no boundaries. Let it be known to him that your love for him is unconditional and you are prepared to have him back, as he is, along with his flaws and shortcomings.
Don’t try to change him, if required change yourself. At times we start taking things for granted. Don’t do that. Loving someone is not sufficient in itself, if it is not displayed properly.
Words are as important as deeds to sustain our relationship. Actions somehow are not always enough.
One has to express the feelings vocally also. Don’t just assume that your partner knows how much you love and care for him. On and off, say it with words also.
Call him randomly, anytime of the day, just to say “I Love You” . He would appreciate the gesture, believe me. Won’t you have? Everyone requires and needs that assurance.
It reconfirms a person’s belief that he is needed and wanted. Start saying three words like “I Love You”, “I Miss You”, and “I Desire You” to make your relationship alive.
You can leave little notes with your feelings expresses on it in different places, where you know he is bound to see them. That would put a big smile on his face.
Along with it you will be constantly there in his mind (that is the main purpose of the whole exercise. Don’t you think so?) Have you ever observed plants closely? If left on their own, even the healthy ones wither and die.
Plants have the tendency to bend towards sun and light. If given proper care and attention, they bloom and flourish. Same is the case with any relationship.
If cared and nurtured properly they shine and illuminate, and if neglected and left on their own they change their directions and flow towards greener pastures. So, don’t let your relationship with your boy friend dry up. Keep it hydrated.
5. Be friends with his friends
Enter into any relationship with open eyes. When dating a boyfriend, one might be mistaken into thinking that loving him and only he is sufficient.
Every relationship comes with certain accessories along with it. You have to accept the package as a whole. Don’t ever try to isolate or separate it from each. Remember your partner has a life apart from you also.
He has a life which consists of his friends, his family, and his colleagues. You might crave for your boy friend’s exclusive time and 15
attention, but over a period of time, even that might turn out to be boring and monotonous.
On and off, try to hang out with his friends. Include your common friends in your outings. His friends are also an integral part of him.
Be in their good books. Always ensure they have something nice to say about you when with him. Be jovial, lively and extrovert in their company. How others perceive you, reflect on your personality.
When wooing your lost love, these friends can be very instrumental.
Friends always cloud your judgment. If you are not accepted or liked by his friends, gradually, even he would start finding faults in you, and shift his attention elsewhere, to a merrier and a livelier company.
Be a sought after person when in a group. This would escalate your worth in his eyes also. Everyone is more attracted to interesting and fun loving people rather than dull and boring ones.
Help out his friends in their problems. You never know when, you might also need their support. Invite his friends over and give him a surprise.
Plan some common outings. As it is, “MORE THE MERRIER”. Even if he has broken up with you, keep in constant touch with his friends.
Hang out with them. Continue going out with them as usual. That will serve two purposes. Firstly, it would make him realize, how comfortable you are with his group and it is not just because of him that they have accepted you but they like your company as an individual also.
Secondly, you will be in constant touch with him. Who all is he mingling up with? Is he dating someone else? Who all are there in his group, now that he has left you? You would not have to worry about these questions since you can be aware of his activities through his friends.
Type of people he hangs out with also gives you a broader idea of his personality. It’s not necessary just spending exclusive time together can bring two people closer.
At times, meeting in a bigger group makes us understand each other better. You come to know of his priorities in life, his likes and dislikes, his basic character. Now use this knowledge to your advantage.
Use his friends as a trump card in winning his love back. Ensure you play your cards right. Let his friends make him realize his mistake by letting you go. Reap now what all you have sown till date in
Play emotional games with his friends. Work on their sympathy. Let them bring your boy friend back to you. All your hard work till now in building up this friendship will pay.
6. Be sincere in your approach
Be your own self. Even if you have gone for a physical changeover, don’t change your inner self. Don’t forget, it was your inner beauty that first attracted him to you.
Though it is a bitter fact men are foremost attracted by the looks of a women, but at the same time we cannot deny the fact that looks are superficial and temporary.
To get your ex back, you might have played around with your looks, but never compromise with what lies behind that outer package.
Be sincere in your approach in getting your man back. Remember, sincerity shows. One can be cunning and shrewd, but it is very short lived.
Be true and honest to your relationship. It never hurts to be straight forward and clean in your pursuit of your man. Let your friends and people around you be aware of your sincere efforts in getting your old flame back.
Convey a clear, but an unspoken message, to everyone concerned, that your boyfriend is not available in the market for anyone to grab.
He is yours to keep. Be subtle, but firm. Don’t give up easily.
Put a “No Trespassing” board around him. You will notice that if you are able to make people around you have belief in your sincerity, even they will go out of their way to help you in your patch up with your ex.
Get in touch with your boy friend. Let him see how sincere and honest you are regarding your relationship. To rebuild your
relationship, start meeting first, just as friends, with no strings attached to it.
Let him see, how much just being with him means to you. Don’t hide your feelings but also don’t play with his emotions. Be clear cut about what you want, leave the rest on him.
Convey it to him whatever he decides, you are always there for him and will always respect his decisions. You will see, your honesty and sincerity touches him deeply. If given a free choice without being pressurized into anything, even he would want to come back to you.
Welcome him back with open arms. Boost his ego, pamper him.
7. Try to be unique and innovative Don’t be a bore. Try to be different from others. Have your own uniqueness. Try to keep your boyfriend enthralled and interested in you.
Let life be a rollercoaster for him with never a dull moment around.
Try to keep him pleasantly surprised with your new innovative ideas and plans. Seeing a love you note and a rose on his office table first thing in the morning might brighten up his whole day.
Remembering his parent’s anniversary and birthdays will make him cherish you more. You should plan out something for them. Give him that special feeling for you by making his parent’s day special.
Cook something warm and nice for him and leave it on his dining table with a miss you note attached to it. Take trouble to be their constantly in his conscience by going out of your way to do things that would make him feel wanted and important. Make yourself indispensable to him.
Even if he is out with some other girl you should always be there as a thorn in his flesh. Make yourself such an integral part of his life
that he is bound to compare other girls with you and always find that something extra missing in them, that only you and you have.
Be extra nice to his girlfriends. In fact never show him that you are hurt or jealous. Don’t make him feel guilty that might rebound back on you later.
Try to include his new girlfriend in your social circle. Be over generous with your hospitality. Don’t give him a chance of blaming you for spoiling his prospects with other girls.
Let him wander out a bit. You never know that it might turn out to be a blessing in disguise for you. He might start appreciating you more.
Always be happy and jovial when around him. Nothing scares out a man more than a crying, sulking woman. Let there never be a dull moment with you around.
Give his new flame a stiff competition. You will soon have him back there on his knees.
8. Give Time and Work as a Team
Give time - Time to yourself and to your ex-beau. Time is the best healer of all.
Cool down, sit quietly and think in retrospect. Where, when and how did your relationship go sour? What all could be done to repair it and how to go about it.
There is no use playing the blame game. It could have been anyone’s fault, but at the moment it’s you who wants her ex back, and so it’s you, who has to make all the efforts.
Don’t hurry and spoil the situation any further. Calmly and sensibly plan out your strategy and imply it accordingly. Once the initial hurt, anger and disappointment settles down review the whole scenario without being judgmental.
Relax and think cool headedly. Was this breakup just a spur of moment action or else things have been boiling up for a long time and both of you have been ignoring it.
Take a day away from all your problems and chill out. One can always think rationally with clear head. Meantime, give your boyfriend also time to reconsider.
He must also be equally emotionally drained out with this breakup and needs as much time and space as you to think about the future.
You never know given time he might also want you back in his life as badly as you want to be a part of his. After a day or two call him up and invite him over casually just for a cup of coffee.
Sit down and talk like two responsible adults, discuss the situation and its repercussions. Make clear to him that you would like a 22
second chance with him and needs more time with him to understand him better.
Make a pact, to act sensibly and start your second innings being just good friends with no expectations from either side. You will realize given this extra time to work on your relationship and that too without any responsibilities and burden being constantly there at the back of your mind, will make you appreciate each other more.
Work on it gradually and take each day as it comes. Don’t expect an overnight magic, but at the same time don’t leave it for too long.
Remember you have to have your boyfriend back in a week’s time and that also whole heartedly without it being a compromise on either of your part. Take a break from your hectic life and both of you go out on a holiday.
Discuss each other’s shortcomings as well as good points. Give a chance to understand each other. Concentrate on making your relationship work well, the second time. Promise not to be impatient and short tempered. If anything comes up which either of you don’t like, calm down, give yourself some time and think how to sort it out.
Don’t take any instant actions. Discuss your problems amongst yourself rationally. Give equal weightage to each other’s opinion.
Work as a team.
9. Understand the psychology
Reverse your breakup by making a genuine effort of understanding what makes your man tick.
There has to be a certain reason for his walkout. Understand his psychology. It would make it simpler and easier for you to work on your patch up if you knew why he did, what he did.
Everyone has its own way to approach his life. What is right for you might be wrong for him. His priorities in life might differ from yours.
Don’t see everything from your angle only. For a change peep into his soul and see the world as he sees it. Your perception for him might take a somersault.
There might be certain trait of yours that has been bothering him for some time and breaking up from you could have been the only easy way out for him.
There is no good or bad person. Everyone has their shortcomings as well as their positive points. Concentrate on the positive ones and try to ignore the shortcomings. Never make the mistake of changing a person.
Nothing irritates a man more than a nagging or interfering girlfriend or wife. If you want him back in your life it should clear in your mind that you are accepting him the way he is. Welcome him back along with his negative aspects.
Change your outlook. Show more empathy towards him. Be more tolerant and more patient. If both of you have any argument, end it, while it is still on a healthy stage.
Don’t make it your ego to always win and have an upper hand. In love there is no winner or no loser.
What is the point of winning an argument if ultimately it leads to losing your boy friend? If having the last word gives him the satisfaction, let him have it. There are various other ways of putting your word across or to get what you want done rather than getting into spat of words.
Be subtle in your approach. If there is something that you want to do, for instance, going out for your friend’s party or some weekend outings with your friends and you want him to come along, but at the same time you know he will be reluctant to go out with your friends, be a little manipulative.
Either include some of his friends also in your excursion or mention your plans to him in such a way, so that he doesn’t get the feeling of being pressurized into doing something against his wishes. In fact, try to make it sound, as if the plan was initially his. Man has a big ego, bigger than life and it needs frequent pumping.
Don’t ever boast about your achievements in front of him or his friends. Firstly, it loses its impact and secondly, more important it turns off a man. Be modest and humble. You would get more credentials that ways, rather than by singing your own praises. Man doesn’t like loud brash girlfriends. Be soft spoken and gentle. You are sure to earn back his love and respect faster that ways.
Broaden your sphere
To every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. At times to serve your purpose you have to do things the other way round. Play a reverse game.
Don’t make, or at least don’t let him realize, that he is the centre of your universe. Broaden your sphere. Involve yourself into other activities.
Give equal importance to your friends and family as to his. Men are generally more attracted to interesting, outgoing, and extrovert women who are competent enough in themselves, rather than the dependent, submissive ones. Play a bit hard to get. Don’t let him trample all over you by lying down as a carpet for him to step over.
Try to gain his respect by both of you being on equal footing. Make intelligent conversations so as to hold his interest for a longer time.
Don’t be just frivolous and flamboyant. Such a life has a very short span. Be a vivid reader. Increase your horizon. You should be able to talk on varied topics and should be able to mingle up with all sort of groups.
You stop doing the running, let him run after you. Show some attitude. Let him be the hunter instead of being hunted. Again as it has been repeatedly mentioned, be subtle in your approach.
Don’t be aggressive in your action.
Catching a boy friend is not the only purpose of this whole exercise.
You have to maintain a healthy relationship with him. Ensure you are involved in some other activities also apart from the ones which are common to both of you. It would give you a separate exclusive entity of yours without you always being dependent on him for making your presence known.
Mark your existence with your individuality. Don’t suffocate each other by keeping 24/7 vigilance. Keep yourself involved constructively elsewhere also and give breathing space to each other.
Don’t let him have the feeling that your life has come to a standstill because of him. Your partner should be a very important part of your life but not your whole life. Relish and enjoy your relationship rather than turning it into a nightmare.
So going back to where we begin from – Life does not follow any set pattern.
There is no rule book. Every individual differs, and so differ their problems. It’s not compulsory that 10 sure shot ways to get your ex
back within one week are applicable in all the cases.
One has to first pin point the problems and the circumstances that led to the break up. Then they have to make up their mind how serious they are in getting back their beloved and to what extent can they go for it.
Then at last choose from the referred solutions. Remember there should be love and respect on both the sides. One sided relationships never work. It would be an immense pleasure to me if I am able to help out any person through this book.