It's July 1966: Three weeks before the FIFA World Cup Final at Wem-bley. The weather is absolutely perfect. A great year for English football fans and a great year for South London Gangsters.
Harry, an evil, violent, criminal, with the ability to make people and problems disappear. He owns South London's premier dance hall, "The Locarno," and as the kingpin of almost all of South London’s criminal activities. Puts him at the top of the police's most " Want To Fuck Over List."
It's early Saturday evening. Harry emerges naked from a short swim in his indoor swimming pool. He's overweight, in his late forties, and it's obvious he eats, drinks, and smokes too much. He towels himself off and throws on a large white fluffy toweling dressing gown, tightens the cord as best he can. There's a bottle of white wine in a bucket of ice on one of the pool side tables. He pours himself a glass until the bottle is empty.
Takes a drink. Lights a cigar.
As is the bent of 99.9% nouveau riche gangsters, they have no taste, or class. Anything that might be construed as refined is totally lost on them.
Harry is no exception.
Point in question: There is a mural he has had painted on the inside walls of his swimming pool. Through very unrealistic painted arches, you can see the equally unrealistic rolling hills of the Italian countryside. It looks like crap.
Now, sitting at one of the many poolside tables is Bob. " A hard man who works for Harry." He's drinking a beer straight from the bottle.
Harry sits down at table with Bob. "I'm taking her out to dinner so I won't be down the club till about 10, ish. Make sure them 3 musketeers are sorted by the time I get there."
Bob, "Sorted?"
Harry, "Yeah, when I arrive I want them 3 rounded up and brought up to my office.. Preferably in one piece.. I want to talk to them about them World Cup tickets."
Amanda, Harry's wife arrives poolside; she's slim with beautiful looks and long black hair. Eager to show off her new dress. Turns a 360*, "How do you like it darling"?
"Fabulous". Harry strokes Amanda's backside.
"I was up town with the girls today, I just couldn't resist it".
"It looks great babe. You look fantastic. We got anymore of that wine left?" Holds up the empty bottle.
"Philistine. You wouldn't know a decent bottle of wine from a 10 bob bottle of plonk." She Leaves pool side with the empty bottle. Goes to the kitchen and takes out a new bottle of wine from the fridge. She hears Harry calling from the pool.
"It's a lovely dress babe. What did that cost me?"
Calls back to Harry. "There's no need for you to worry yourself about little things like that darling. I've put it on the card."
Harry, to Bob, "It's a wonder she never got the shoes and handbag to match."
Amanda is still in the kitchen opening the bottle of wine.
Harry calls out again, "How come you never bought an handbag and shoes to match?"
Amanda Arrives back at pool side with the newly opened bottle of wine, hands it to Harry. "No need to shout darling. I did find a pair of shoes, but they didn't have my size. The nice lady said she would have a pair sent over from one of their other shops."
"Sent over. Sent over to where?"
"Why here of course. Darling, you can't expect me to go traipsing all the way back up town just for a pair of shoes."
Harry to Bob, "I got the only bird in England that has her shoes delivered."
Then quickly back to Amanda, "No babes cor's not."
The Intercom at the front gate Buzzes.
Harry, "Fuck me that was quick". Harry answers the Intercom. "Yeah who is it?"
A voice from the Intercom. "It's the Gas Board. We've had a report of a leak."
Harry sniffs the air. "Can't smell anything."
"We need to come in and check."
"Hang on I've got to put some clothes on."
Bob, "What's that all about?"
"I'm fucked if I know. We're all electric. Tell you what. You tooled up?"
"That's what you pay me for." Pulls out a pistol from behind his back.
Harry to Amanda, "Go upstairs, lock yourself in the bedroom, and don't come out till I tell ya."
"What's happening?"
"Just get up them fucking stairs and don't come down till I tell ya.
Right?"
"Ok...Just be careful." Amanda hurries away out of the pool area, and into the main body of the house.
Intercom buzzes again. "Hello."
"Hang on. I'm putting me trousers on." Picks up a phone and quickly di-als a number. "I want half a dozen of you round my place NOW." Hangs up phone. Opens cupboard, takes out a shotgun.
Bob, "You got another one of them?"
Harry opens another cupboard; hands Bob an even bigger shotgun.
Bob with a broad grin on his face, "That should do the trick."
Harry, "We gonna do this or what?" Holds up the remote gate opener.
They both smile at each other loving every second of the buzz. Harry presses the remote, and the gate starts to open.
They both burst out of the house into the courtyard. Guns up and ready for action. "The 4 Gas Men" with canvas bags over their shoulders enter.
Fumbling to get their weapons out of their bags. Bob goes screaming towards them, shotgun blazing. Downs 3 of them, Harry only gets one.
With all four bodies on the ground, three of them not moving. Bob has his boot on the throat of number four.
Harry now standing beside Bob . "You know you're a fucking maniac."
"That's what you pay me for. Mind you someone else said to me a long time ago." Bob has a Flashback to when he was in the army, his face and hands covered in blood and camouflage grease. He's holding a pistol and a machete. His boot is on the throat of an enemy survivor. Looking down into the eyes of the lone survivor, he unloads two shots into his head. Remembering the words his combat sergeant said to him. "You're a fucking maniac."
Bob brings himself back to the present, "Fuck em."
The lone survivor is finding it hard to breath under Bob's boot. "I can't breath."
Bob presses down harder with his boot. "Shut the fuck up."
Harry to the survivor, "What the fuck was that all about?"
Harry turns his attention to Bob, "Hey Bob."
Bob, "What?"
Harry, "Give us a fucking chance". Motions to Bob to ease up on the pressure on Survivor's throat.
Bob, Realizes he's pressing just a little too hard on the guys throat, "Oh yeah." Eases up on the pressure.
Harry, "Well, what the fuck was that all about?"
Survivor, "Spain."
Harry, "What the fuck you on about?"
"He don't tell me much. All I know is you fucked him over on some property over there."
"You talking about Vince?"
"Yeah. He's well and truly pissed."
"No shit. Why couldn't the fat cunt just come and talk to me, or better still, just pick up the fucking phone."
"You know him. He's a fucking nutter."
"So all this bollocks is about a couple of poxy villas"? Walks away. Talking to himself. Shouts back to Bob. "Sort him out."
A SHOT RINGS OUT
Harry spins around to see Bob standing over the survivor with a smoking gun, “What the fuck?"
Bob, inquisitively, "What?"
"I said sort him out. Not blow his fucking head off. Tell you what. Don't ever let anyone ever tell you you're not a raving fucking lunatic."
"Cheers Harry, I thought I was, but it's nice to have it confirmed."
Harry turns away in exasperation, shaking his head, walks towards the house talking to himself, "He. Is stark starring raving fucking mad."
Amanda Appears at the courtyard door to the house. "You boys been having fun?" She looks down at Harry's dressing gown. Sees he has an erection poking up from under his dressing gown. "Looks like YOU have."
"I thought I told you to stay in the bedroom." He hasn't noticed his erection yet.
"OK I'll go back in, but only if you come with me". She takes Harry by the hand and leads him into the house.
Harry takes a look down at his erection. He is pleased at what he is seeing, and with a broad smile of self satisfied, happily follows Amanda, "Yeah sounds like a good idea."
The Intercom at the front gate buzzes. Harry is halted in his tracks just long enough to answer the intercom. Impatiently, he doesn't want to lose his erection, "What?"
A voice from the the other end of the intercom, "We're here Boss."
Harry takes a few steps back out into the courtyard, shouts over to Bob.
"Bob, sort em out. No, no no I don't mean sort em out. I mean just let em in, and sort this shit out." He turns around and goes back into the house, now doing his best to catch up with Amanda.
Bob notices his boss's erection, smiles to himself, "OK see you in a minute".