D.I.S.S.U.S. 2030 by Edward Drobinski - HTML preview
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2030
By
Edward Drobinski
Copyright © 2019 by Edward Drobinski;
All rights reserved.
Well beyond the bothersome semi-constraints formerly imposed through weak US law, all rights are reserved. This book may not be duplicated, distributed, or Allah forbid, hellaciously fornicated, without written permission from at least three recognized Ayatollahs or Imams, as stated in Koran 2:23 under the penalty of death by stoning; further addressed in Koran 7:12
which adds the subsequent exclusion from each, all, and every of Mohammed’s seven heavens. The copyright holder doesn’t really care what you choose to do, and frankly would likely find your lawless demise amusing; but in an act of outdated western fairness is compelled to issue this warning. An accredited book reviewer, meaning that they get paid for reviewing, as opposed to those useless, stupid, on-line freebie, flouncing dilettantes may quote brief passages in the course of writing a review; limited to one of the laudatory type and upon submission of proof of purchase.
The characters and events in this book are fictitious.
Understand? Fictitious? As in untrue, fabricated, invented, made-up (not like in Liberace), false, pretended, fictional, conjured, and all those other words one politely calls liars. In fact they are so obviously fictitious that any attempt to assert otherwise would have to be the mercenary ploy of some lazy, non-productive crook or crooks, counseled, aided, and abetted by an
otherwise unemployed DEI chiseler or chiselers, as yet un-dismissed from the less than diligent bar. The year of the book is 2030. Like duh?? You know what day this is, ace?
Last and moreover, the unbalanced writer has vowed to report abusers to their local Muslim IDEAS office. Be forewarned.
For Anni, my best pal ever and her Benji terror.
“Somebody should have warned the English and Americans. Beware of gifts bearing Muslims.”
Table of Contents
The Big News 5-17-30 .......................................... 1
Pleased to Meet Me ............................................ 7
James’ Question .............................................. 22
Decadent Underground Parties ................................. 32
An Explanation ............................................... 54
Ruminations .................................................. 68
Norton Barges In ............................................. 80
The Unofficial History of DISSUS ............................. 85
Trump, Jr. on Hooey Sterno ................................... 87
The Fire Franchise Boss Becomes Bugged ...................... 141
My Trial at IDEAS HQ ........................................ 149
Sentencing .................................................. 179
The Broken Clock is Looted .................................. 216
The Grind Restored .......................................... 222
Tupac Obama’s Speech ........................................ 234
Hovel Sweet Hovel ........................................... 261
Page 1
The Big News 5-17-30
TheInterdepndentObserver.com
as respectfully reprinted from
The Guardian by way of
The New York Tattler
of unspecified varying dates, in turn allegedly taken from Reuters
May 17, 2030
by Jennifer Jihad, Freelance Journalist Theresa May Declares Brexit De Facto Dead In a surprisingly candid statement, 73 year old former UK Prime Minister Theresa May declared Brexit dead. PM in 2016, when the people voted to leave the European Union, she has now directly declared the vote null and void, after suffering years of accusations of indirect intrigues. “Look here,” she said, “There
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is absolutely no point in leaving the EU when we are its only remaining member. One cannot leave one’s self.”
“When Latvia left in April, it left Great Britain as the first desiring to leave the dance, as well as the last partnerless one still there. Embarrassing at the very least; wouldn’t you say?”
PM May has suffered fourteen years of criticism over her handling of the affair, and now feels vindicated. “Look here again. It would have been quite rude to just up and go in 2016
based solely on the vote of 52% of the less-than-well-informed people in a non-binding referendum on that one particular day without some sort of mutually acceptable agreement. Even disregarding the other spurious issues, 52% is far from any sort of mandate. In a civilized country, one does not get comme ci, comme sa divorced by willy-nilly sneaking away at night without leaving any note.”
For your information, The United Kingdom European Union membership referendum, also known as the EU referendum and the Brexit referendum, took place on June 23, 2016 to ask the electorate if the country should remain a member of, or leave
the European Union, under the provisions of the European Union
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Referendum Act of 2015 and also the Political Parties, Elections
and Referendums Act of 2000. The referendum resulted in 51.9% of
votes being cast in favor of leaving the EU. Although the referendum was legally non-binding, the May government of that time had promised to implement the result, and it initiated the officially farcical and pathetic EU withdrawal process nine months later on March 29, 2017.
“In politics, the astute of us learn that if one is patient, the needed decisions are most often provided for you. Time has clearly shown that this has become quite silly on the most practical of levels. Our left hand cannot very well negotiate with our right hand as to who holds the 400 million pounds. It’s like publicly talking to one’s self, and one might be seen as bonkers if seen doing that. We have attained the best of both worlds. Through astute, persevering management we have retained the entirety of the benefits attendant to remaining, while we have also gained the benefits of having left.”
“If I may dare speak candidly, the politically shrewd among you no doubt know that even below average elected officials have absolutely no intention of following the ridiculous whims of the
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uninformed voters. Indeed, just like everyone else desirous of a lucrative career, we primarily represent the whims of our large corporate contributors, including the dictates of the information controlling ‘social’ media, which have the goods on all of us. This whole Brexit business got a bit out of hand when some elected wise asses decided that it might be humorous to throw this right in the faces of the voters. Rather than the usual blah-blah-blahing disinterest in the undefined will of the people, the non-binding referendum of 2016, which some un-credentialed turkeys perversely said would be binding, showed very clearly as opposed to the standardized ‘serious appearing’
and fogging claptrap, that we political muckers have absolutely no intention whatsoever of following the vote demonstrated will of our plebian constituents. If you might pardon my Arabic, we don’t give two Shiites. In the near future, I think it is safe to say that responsible politicos have learned that it is not wise to directly ask the rabble what they want. The clarity may prove unacceptably blinding, necessitating an official response of a roundabout, convoluted, interminable KMA. Speaking of which, did you see the Biden photos? Shameful abuser of privileged position. And at his age. Humph.”
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“Still, I am confident, that with continued help from our Illuminilibtardi friends, Britain will soon be able to manage their own affairs, just like the Africans.”
“Besides, at the most bottom of lines relevant to my many peasant constituents; those nasty, raping, knifing Muslim invaders bearing a behavioral intolerance and an ‘Allah granted gift’ to tell everyone what to do, such as has not been seen since the days of that over-his-head State Secretary George C.
Marshall, have all relocated to D.I.S.S.U.S, with the continuing full approval of the media savvy, Sharia supportive, black-shirted Antifa fascists. God bless and save England, our Queen, and Tommy Robinson, not necessarily in that order.”
We at Reuters would like to extend our sincere thanks for the prior interview/statements which were granted with the unanimous approval of the Saturday evening staff of the Devonshire Dementia Care Home; where Ms. May has been residing and thinks presiding since 2020 when Nigel Farage and Boris Johnson got uppity. Reuters especially thanks them for the sanction and Ms.
May’s bubble bath. Elsewhere in the world;
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DISSUS (formerly the US) Has a New Supreme Court More or less on this day, the nine members of the Supreme Court simultaneously died from undiagnosed terminal phlebitis.
President Tupac Obama’s nominations for replacement of Ayman Muhammed Rabbaie al-Zawahiri, Saif al-Abdel, Anwar al-Awlaki, Naser al-Wahayishi, Abu Yahu al-Libi, Busta Rhymes, Flavor Fav, Fifty Cent, with Sharia Fatwah at the helm were approved in two hours by both the House and Senate. The delay was encountered as a result of objections to two original nominees; The Notorious B.I.G. and Osama bin Laden on the grounds of purported death, and a House-Senate wish not to get bogged down in that invariably ensuing and tiresome Old School-New School BS, which resulted in Tupac’s substitution of al-Awlaki and color co-ordinated Rhymes. This deft political maneuver overcame all objections, excepting a few hateful Republican reservations concerning Sharia’s alleged transvestitism. Their first act was to legalize white beheading as a punishment for improper and recidivist existence.
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Pleased to Meet Me
Please excuse my poor tabloid manners. It’s not my wish to be discourteous, but things around here have gotten even more messed up than usual and I’m not myself. I’m Ralph Modesto. My humble family of three, counting yeztruly, my wife Alice and son James, but not including Sammy the boarder, reside on Humble Lane, in a hovel in the development called Humble Hovels, Our humble abode. Trust me; it looks much better in color; really; property of the author.
which is situated in the borough of Humbletown, in the state of Humility, in the Delphic Islamic Squealing State of the United States (DISSUS), formerly known as the United States of America, now still commonly referred to as Rogue State, and still seen, albeit only partially, as the rich white terrorist country it was once considered in its entirety.
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In all fairness to anyone’s suspicious mind, I do suspect
that Sammy’s real name is Ibrahim Salih Mohammed Al-Yacoub. This
revelation was entirely accidental. Hehe. I was retrieving the mail while kind of spaced and inattentive to the requirements of the task at hand. When I got the snail desecrated lumber to the kitchen, I scanned through the customary sales pitches, cons, and exciting notices of having won bonus points; brightly noticing that two pieces of said lumber were addressed to one Ibrahim Salih Mohammed Al-Yacoub at this humble address. Though one did not have enough space to get past the “Yac” on the top line, I figured that it was a reasonable guess to think that they intended reaching the same person. One was from the hobby retailer; “Al Harb’s Burst Aides; your favorite polyester resin and catalyst merchant.” The other was from some DISSUS
governmental agency, a new one I guess, as I had not previously heard of “The International Institute for Democracy and Electoral Assistance (IIDEA).” I was intrigued to find out what the second was about; but an ideological reverence for the sanctity, as well as fines and jail terms, of the mail system overwhelmed me, and I put the two items back in the box, hoping it would look like the posting of a bill to any casual observer.
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I can and do laconically rattle that off for any near ear.
My primary intent is to get a well-paid gig on “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert;” you know, that Illuminilibtardi propaganda “comedy” show they’ve been fucking up ever since Leno left. Barring that for now, I’m more or less contented to hone my material delivery skills through practice; which truly seems to excite the ringy thingy on the masjid. My tertiary goal is to convey a bemused attitude toward the popular, hula-hoop-type novelty which has been coming here through the Rio Grande since the days of the First-Muslim-in-Charge. If that “humor” escapes you at first, try thinking Rupert Pupkin, that’s DeNiro, pre-empting an aged Jerry Lewis, laughing at someone-he-hate’s teeth being broken through sucking on too large a sour ball, while trying to say that he was okay with blood covering his spat out tooth scraps. I really don’t think so, but I guess I could imagine how for some this would be considered an acquired taste; requiring much too much .............. whatever. Welcome to the hovel.
My current state of mind might be interpreted as unbalanced or at least confused. I’m having some difficulty in reconciling and understanding how my middling career efforts at the middling local “Jimmy Hoffa Memorial Crematorium” franchise, have gone
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unrecognized. This is after four hard working years of diligent, piping hot requirements; right in the ugliest faces of disease, infirmity, flattening and insistent, yet too often untended, familial obligations, but in full compliance with any vaguery inferred by the dictatorial operations manuals in existence. I have attained the “glorious” rank of Assistant Domestic Non-Sentient Fireman, that which I had on day one, with the same pay.
I don’t know, but this may have been consistent with what has resulted in my having been charged by the Islamic Defense Establishment Artillery Section (IDEAS), not to be confused with the International Deepstate Equalized Anarcho Socialists (IDEAS), with ostensibly being a rich, white, though covert terrorist. Since the return of another Obama as a First Muslim in Chief, new IDEAS have been proliferating like poppies in an Afghani spring.
I can almost understand when I dumb down a few necessary notches. ...... In fairness, I must note that this conclusion is based on a speculation which would be rejected by every credentialed Physicist; and even worse, rejected by the Physics
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PhD candidates and even the aspiring nutjobs at the Master’s level who spend the bulk of their time giving mathematically based near-credence to that weirdo multiverse quantum stuff.
Undergrad they re-check the water-heat-steam calculations, never finding an error. Perhaps this is what makes them get all goofy.
It is sad, but it is also my possibly ordained and unfairly considered pathetic destiny. Before you might think that that sounds too whiny and solicitous of the obligatory, amusing,
“kindly,” supportive, and “social” shit, please be advised that I have always and continue to recognize that at the most bottom of lines, other opinions have all the significance of last Wednesday’s incorrect weather prediction.
This sluggish, low paid position followed my sixteen glorious years ending as a well-paid Senior Vice President for Deutsch Offshore Advisors USA, continually rising from my initial Assistant Junior Tax Dodging Analyst level. But, Deutsch was chased to Yakutsk, Siberia, Russian Federation by the Muslim interlopers even while Trump, Jr. was still in office; and I’m a picky traveler. I try not to think of those wonderful years.
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Luvya, all my old pals in the permafrost. All the best. If this global warming BS has any merit, spring might be coming soon. Hehe.
While it is always difficult to pinpoint the first instance, I think that the First Muslim in Chief, Barack Obama, got the transitional absurdity started back around 2010 with a seemingly innocuous Twitter twaddle which went the commonly overused term of viral, not yet recognized as being of its pathological “word equivalent” witchery. As is now required by the state, the momentous announcement hangs on my middle-western wall, having replaced my esoteric quote from old Henry Ford;
"Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal."
Oh, please excuse me again. Henry used to make cars before everyone started turning Japanese around 1970. ........ Can you keep that under your hat? You know, when you say things like that they call you old, fossil, codger, stuff like that. I don’t really give a wet raspberry about that, but the Muslims and Libby Millennials investigate you for “infractions” against the required nicey-nicey speech restricting laws if you say that
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there was something here before they were. How they reconcile that subject with each other would seem to require more hoop jumping than Antifa’s de facto support of Sharia law, thighing, and child grooming. Perhaps one day, I’ll get enlightenment through a tiny glimpse into one of Mohammed’s heavens.
Required Obama Twitter twaddle; property of the author.
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That can’t be argued as IDEAS never made its presence known until two years ago in 2028, when the “new ideas” man finally succumbed to a prolonged bout with elephantitis of the ears when the condition spread to his nostrils and from there proceeded to his alleged brain, leaving his son Tupac alone in the White House, barring another successful Ayatollah fatwah.
I can understand how we rich white people cannot escape being decadent and racist. For in excess of 400 years we have run the show to our liking. We came to take it for granted. It’s in our bones. But, I do think that I understand the view that Republican tax cuts might be viewed as terrorism against the poor, as the benefits go only to those who pay taxes, and have a debatable effect upon those who don’t; through either low income or untraceable cash gimmicks.
But all this is unimportant now, as it looks like I’ll be spending the rest of my life on the water ride in Abu Grabby, being tortured into making up stories about other secretly Islamophobic white devils with hidden loot. I’ll probably never know what caused this. It’s not required. But, I have a few guesses.
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The other day, very proud of his successful salvaging and reconstructive work, my twelve year old son, James Modesto pedaled down the driveway and into the street. He hadn’t travelled very far when suddenly he heard a voice he was hoping not to hear, that of nosy Joe Finke.
“Hey, boy. Stop right here. ...... That bicycle looks obscenely expensive.”
“It’s an old Schwinn!”
“Antique?”
“I put it together with parts I found at the junkyard!”
“No need to get defensive, boy. Just admiring your fine bike.”
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“You can get one just like it with a trip to the junkyard and a little work.”
“Good tires like that don’t sit in junk yards.”
“Well, no. You have to buy those.”
“Not certain humble I can afford that.”
“$12.95 on sale at K-Mart.”
“Each?”
“Yeah.”
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“That’s enough to feed a starving person in Afghanistan for a month.”
“Gee whizz. Can you imagine how much better things would be there if the Taliban would behave like your everyday organized crime gang?”
“Have a posh white day.”
Dejected, and sensing potential trouble, James brought the bicycle right back home, his initial modest elation now having been quickly potential “informant” converted to being fearful of being reported to the local IDEAS authorities. He put it inside the open, garage, and went back to the kitchen where he had piled up his Islamic school textbooks, intending to study more of Muhammed’s heavenly excursions and white deviltry. Instead he was surprised to find me home on a workday.
“Dad, nosy old Mr. Finke had something to say about my
‘posh’ bike.”
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I was not in the best of moods. I was home from work early because Omar, the town employee who scoops up the Humbletown road kill, got a little careless on the job, cut a few corners near prayer time, and wound up being flattened road kill himself, a lump near what might have been an ass facing or butting Medina. This recycling, popularly called crushed art was provided free; courtesy of an out-of-control Humbletown garbage truck. With nothing to do while waiting for the ambulance, cops, social worker, and the Muslim Imam who would try to get the corpse to say; "I bear witness that there is no god but Allah,"
the innovative drivers threw all the road kill, excepting the more or less flattened road kill guy into their truck. So, I was having an easy morning flipping the privately delivered goldfish into the oven when “Bernie”-Abdul told me to go home saying; “I can’t afford to pay you for doing nothing.”
After hearing James’ story I was infuriated, having had a head start, and in anger made a decision I will regret for as long as I live. I said; “Mr. Joseph Finke’s old ass is annoyed.
Is it really? Let’s show him what annoyed really is.”
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I took James to Walmart and we bought his choice of a scooter which wasn’t the cheapest one there. A Razor Pocket, fuckin’ A; two hundred and forty-nine greenies plus the razor challenged Imam’s cut.
Razor Pocket Mod 24-volt Electric Scooter, $249.00 plus the razor challenged Imam’s cut; property of the author.
When we got back I told James to ride it around the block, FLAGRANTLY. I went the first hundred feet with him and when I saw Joe Finke gapping I said; “Good day, Mr. F. Have an assessment of this scooter? ....... Didn’t think so. Take your
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time. I’d caution you to close your mouth as the black flies are in full flight this time of year. Yes, that’s a luxury scooter, just like the one Snoop Dog’s kid has.”
Picking up on my tone, James, took the cue and flipped the buzzard off, stopping to add a two handed version while verbalizing; “Sit on it, fink face,” and closed with a daredevil behind-the-back adaptation inclusive of an impromptu two-handed KMA chaser, before speeding dowm Humble Lane at 15 precarious miles-per-hour.
I was never more proud of my son.
Though quite fun in the moment, this undoubtedly proved to have been a major mistake as without doubt fish-face-Finke reported the event to the IDEAS authorities, causing this soon-to-be-mentioned, ridiculous IDEAS charge; and even if it didn’t it could present complications to its adjudication, if any. I suspect that in and of itself James’ scooter and the Finke flip-off would have constituted a minor personal infraction carrying a penalty no greater than two minutes of public stoning with
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small, blunt rocks. But I feared that we might be living in strange times.
In fact, the event’s repercussions began to manifest with the speed attendant to a Syrian ISIS capitulation to 10 US
troops backed by 50 Kurds armed with Neotech holographic sighting with magnifier, as little James became virtually immediately required to supplement his regular scholastic endeavors with an after-hours course on Ellen Degeneres Potty Mouth and Dance. James told me that the course seemed to have had a counter-productive effect, as at break the kids required to attend found it the height of hilarity to smoke regular Marlboros, and say things like “Eat my shorts, lesbo,” and
“Dance on this, Butch.”
If I had it to do over again, I’d just have gone over to Finke’s under the cover of darkness, and used my RoundUp to write “ISIS FINK” on his humble lawn.
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James’ Question
A rare Millennial; one with an inkling that something might have pre-dated their whiny, entitled existences, James asked me if we rich, white people were always governed by righteous, brownish Muslims and poor black rappers in Ferraris, aided by rich, white collaborators like Mr. Finke.
“Son, this phenomenon could be seen coming for a decade or more. In recent times it finally got full traction when the home grown International Deepstate Equalized Anarcho Socialists (IDEAS) conspired with Howling Organized Western Libbies (HOWL), Democracy International (DI), and International Institute for Democracy and Electoral Assistance (IIDEA) to simultaneously declare the US a terrorist nation, primarily for the alleged harboring of rich white demons.”
“We’re rich white demons? Demons too?”
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“Sure. Can’t you tell by our surrounding opulence? My goodness, that laptop alone must have a market value exceeding $100.”
“ .......... “
“Please excuse me.” I got up and banged my shoe against the wall and hollered “If you don’t turn down that oud music, I’ll report you for possession of that decadent contraband sound system.”
I sat back down and continued; “Gone are the pleasant neighborhood mornings of ‘Good morning Mrs. Farnsickle. I must complement you on your thriving begonias.’ Now we and Mrs.
Farnsickle grunt out greetings marginally courteous and eye each other for a sign of an opulence reportable to the enforcement arm of the DISSUS IDEAS Bureau, 92% staffed by belligerent Q-Tip heads. Gone are the malls where we rich white demons glutted ourselves on the fares of Dillard’s, Banana Republic, and Athlete’s Foot. Now they’re all gone, replaced by jails,
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investigative departments of the government, Moe’s Discount Hajibery, and Dar-us Salam Publications.
When I mentioned this to James, he said; “Actually, Moe’s has a pretty cool knife section. I was thinking maybe one day we could ........... “ I answered; “Let’s wait for Ramadan.
Everything goes on sale then.”
Now don’t get me wrong as I’m not the least bit of an Islamophobe. I rented half our hovel to an Iranian who listed his occupation as “jihadist,” that by the way of Brooklyn, and on the IDEAS approved list. He called himself Sammy, perhaps a poor joke on my Uncle Sam, who was midfoot maimed by an Austrian Glock 17 in Iraq; and forever thereafter was reduced to hobbling disability; the latter term fortunately inclusive of financial considerations. Poor Uncle Sam.
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Glock 17; property of the author.
It was nice to get Sammy’s monthly rent; my humble little family now able to keep one laptop and a 40 watt bulb on after dark, so that James might be able to do his required Alwaleed Islamic studies. I admit that the benefits of Sammy’s presence were not always in the forefront of my reasoning, as Sammy, who was apparently lacking in the need to go to a job, played an electrified four stringed oud, and accompanied it with high pitched chanting which sounded like “Ooveramavee, ooveramayou, ooveramawee, ooveramadoo,” over and over again. Try as one may, some people have not been Allah blessed with the voice or the ability to phrase of Frank Sinatra or Tiny Tim; their lack of blessing ostensibly a “good” Allah ordained punishment for any rich white demons within earshot.
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But, please excuse me once more, as I’ve been getting ahead of myself. I probably could continue to humbly live with the nosy neighbor finks, the low income, and seeing James’ school picture with him wearing a black and blue kufi prayer hat, just like all the swarthy boys named Mohammed. Being well under the radar horizon, I could nod approvingly the few times required and enjoy my time with Alice, while substantially being able to ignore the Nulib-Muslim dictates, were I not un-nerved by the e-mail I got the day before yesterday.
To: Ralph Modesto
From: IDEAS
Subject: Terrorist Activity
This order may not be communicated to anyone other than the addressee, under section 3 of the “Patriot Act,” A/K/A “Uniting and Strengthening America (sic) by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism Act of 2001,” as well as that which is stated in Koran 67:3–4; “You are not entitled to be represented by an attorney or Imam.”
You are hereby ordered to promptly report at 9AM on Tuesday, May 21, 2030 to Room 103 of the local IDEAS office at 396
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Corrections Parkway, in the borough of Humbletown, in the state of Humility, in the Delphic Islamic Squealing State of the United States (DISSUS), where you will face unspecified charges of terrorism, as defined in the “Patriot Act,” as they may or may not relate to decadent, underground activities.
Punishment for failure to appear and/or communication of your requirement to appear includes, but is not limited to beheading, stoning, limb amputation, life at Abu Grabby, and denial of heavenly access.
Cordially,
Muhammed Iqbal
Assistant Determinator
At first I thought it was one of those “funny” scams the computer proficient, young anarchos run. I thought of Dylan’s
“Rainy Day Women # 12 & 35” in what was initially an ironically amusing 2030 context to me.
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Stoning and “Rainy Day Women # 12 & 35” by Bob Dylan; property of the author, the latter under both the “fair use” and “transformative” doctrines.
On second thought it wasn’t so funny any more. The times they are a changin’ again, this time in the wrong direction.
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Back on the subject of the e-mail I started to doubt that it was a phony when I saw that it inferred information about yeztruly only a few people could possibly know. The decadent, underground activities might well indicate my attendance at Aabirah and Sindhy’s underground parties. They could have allowed informants in or were informants themselves. In 2030 D.I.S.S.U.S. no one can be fully trusted.
I got as serious as an Ayatollah in the proximity of a belligerent razor when I realized that the evidence, if still required, could be damning. My family and I usually keep to ourselves; a seemingly unnecessary difficulty incorrectly viewed as being achieved through an unjust luxury of sorts; but substantially overcoming that sapling view accidentally; Alice and I sometimes get an urge to engage in forbidden frivolity with other humble white middling devils.
Bossy boss “Bernie”-Abdul Nouri at the Crematorium was the one who had told me about Aabirah and Sindhy’s parties. So I guess I should have known better, but the outings were so invigorating.
An evening, once a week, in which the group could go down into the dugout and for a few hours revel in the images now deemed
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inappropriate, of horrendous taste, yadda yadda, inclusive of that which is destined to be regurgitated in disdain on tomorrow’s MSNBC highlighted “news.”
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Decadent Underground Parties
Aabirah and Sindhy, over on Meek Lane, had taken a cue from what the earliest Native Americans did when the Spaniards forbade them from practicing their own religions, perhaps oddly under the same exhumed Muslim penalty of a semi-important limb’s amputation for a first offense if okayed by the area’s Ayatollah/Bishop; and dug out secret basements under certain houses to continue their practices. Aabirah and Sindhy had that done by a renegade general contractor Aabirah once referred to as “Bin Laden US Enterprises.”
Perhaps their names should have given me a second hint of a possible setup, but I was desperate for tales of Tiffany ......
Gucci ......... Louis Vuitton. So, every Friday evening a group of we devilish luxury devotees would meet, share some wine, speak very proper Leslie-Howard-type English, and peruse old issues of Vogue, Elle, and Harper’s Bazaar. Alice and I found it exhilarating and as insidiously addictive as an ISIS thug does a brand new chainsaw.
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Aabirah and Sindhy’s humble dugout basement; the kind courtesy of Pexels.com under their CC0
license; modified.
Ah, the sweet remembrance of things past always brings a joyous tear. Please excuse the mushy, unforgivable nostalgia.
....... Thank you. The curved stairway shown on the photo’s left was actually, potentially treacherous as its necessary pitch was so severe, that if one did not take the utmost of care, they risked a head bashing tumble to the natural stone floor. Various potpourri was intermittently added by the guests; indeed
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encouraged. Alice and I once brought a contraband video of Moon Unit and Frank Zappa singing “Valley Girl.” It was played on the huge screen hung defiantly high on the wall. Everyone was noddin’, boppin’, while fondling the contraband, underground, shiny trinkets lying on the tables. Ah, for a few minutes we were all back in the good old days. “I am sure. Totally.”
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Shopping mall and “Valley Girl” by Moon Unit and Frank Zappa; property of the author, the latter under both the “fair use” and “transformative” doctrines.
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Oh, and those magnificent wall hangings.
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I remember the time when Joanie read that 2015 Harper’s bazaar essay by Lionel Shriver. It was so ahead of its time I had memorized it. “On lesser matters some book reviewers have bemoaned the lack of male authors capable of writing in the female voice. Casual perusal has indicated that this group is far from rare. They are difficult to find primarily because the media controlling Illuminilibtardi have not yet sanctioned the open mention and display of the ‘tits-on-a-bull’ genre; as well
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as how this particular form of ‘perversity’ would be a violation of the governing Muslim beliefs, or they would at least say that it was in a somewhat humorous contradiction of the Muslim male penchant to wear those flowing robes which ape ballroom gowns.
Now that we’re on the subject, on an even lesser note, it seems worthy of mentioning that to say ‘THE female voice’ presumes that there is only one. Three seems an extremely reasonable reality, even when ‘minor’ differences, like momentary positional preferences, are not considered.”
Don’t get me wrong. When current events are less than ideal, nostalgia recalls the best parts of the past, conveniently blocking out the worst. That house on the wooded five acres overlooking the waterway was such a problem to maintain and the constant view of cheery boaters waving was enough to make an invasive leaping carp bite the hook.
Below is a picture I took when approaching the property in my lost bowrider “Pegasus” on one of those dismal days. The dock is virtually undetectable in the shadows of the trees. The house is also barely visible, the latter purposely that way in search of some semblance of privacy. You can see the cleared, but
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poorly mowed section near the water. In tedium, I used to harangue Javier about that, but as soon as he was out of my sight it was siesta time, as “dee motor, she break, boss” and I had to remain polite, because of all the expensive Illuminilibtardi laws about “proper” and “hate” speech during Javier’s redundant rendition of all that shit. My doctor wondered why my blood pressure level had gone through the roof.
I didn’t dare tell her, in fear of the Islamic imposition of a possible ninety days and a quarter million dollar fine.
D.I.S.S.U.S. 2030
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View from “Pegasus” going home; property of the author.
And I absolutely detested having to deal with that snarky, lazy French au pair. When convenient she would oh so cutely “je-ne-parle-pas-anglais” the putain de pisse out of me. Esme always mentioned that she was going to Columbia, as if she was some sort of unique gem of the ocean. Ostensibly, Ms. Self-Satisfied must have forgotten that she came from Ivry on the Seine. I’m
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only glad that the majority of the time the plain little Frog sequestered herself within the three room wing of the house, which we allotted her highness.
And all those gray days at the job. Christ! Advising all those ludicrous rich white twits in pressed suits how they could legally hide income and not pay any taxes. The Senior Vice Presidency, bonus and stock option situation was an illusion concocted by the right-wing fascists to enslave we poor workers.
In terms of potential interest, I guess it’s up there on the relative difficulty job scale, but after three months becomes boring standard operating procedure after determining what it was that the pretentious crook was actually doing. The only solace was in that these “big shots” were either too lazy or too fatuous to know what the IRS code allowed. So, they’d pay my fee and usher me out after they thought that they could blame me for any future IRS or SEC ramifications. Thank you for that much, fazools.
And those goddam brokerage accounts; always a “mistake.”
That would hold some more water if the mistake wasn’t always in their favor. When you try to fix it, you get the three ringed
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runaround circus; designed to make you say; “Fuck the lousy thousand,” as if you pursue it for weeks, when you get to the last station, before fixing it they want to know your great-great-great-great-great grandmother’s maiden name; and those rip-off legacy web sites can’t even tell you your mama’s first name.
The computer assisted corruption had reached epic levels.
With the benefit of hindsight, I guess that was inevitable; the natural product of growth.
Don’t even bring up that Islam triggered market crash, bigot. Nonsense. No, the problem was not that unsubstantiated ex-post-facto ISIS claimed “plan” for a shoot-up of the exchange traders. Nor was the crash a function of the shooting itself; the source most likely that of one or two of the many nerds USA guaranteed to be blessed with gun access; in other words the domain of the nutjobs grammar school stymied for any of a number of “reasons” only other nutjobs and the Illuminilibtardi find relevant, when their “plans” failed to include the lack of easy research into that on their day of fame, retribution, and anti-heroism, that the local facility, which usually housed their
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mean bullies was closed, necessitating a token recompensed subway ride. Making the standardized, required, regretful statements with a flag wave here and there, to anyone interested in listening, yet all too curiously eager “new,” professionally trained traders arrived in identical garb the next day and managed to carry on.
Working through Muslim-in-Charge #2, the Tupac Obama figurehead, the fundamentalist beardos with the Norman Bates’
complex, “righteously” pressured the placing of sanctions and tariffs on the whole non-Muslim world, starting with the now defunct US. On a theoretical level, this presented the same difficulties enumerated by Prime Minister May, as articulated in her permitted remarks allegedly recorded this month, more or less, at the Devonshire Dementia Care Home, when she was permitted to address both the history of and current insignificance of the Brexit blah blah.
“About time;” said the happy Illuminilibtardi-lock-step-gang, their “likes’ clicking to another reported “viral” volume point which endangered not only the ability to communicate that which will be forgotten the next day, but even more importantly,
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attesting to the economic viability of the web itself; though obviously not yet considering the digital display on the lower right hand corner; ostensibly referencing the former, if one can still activate the screen’s un-displayed-last-page-recall button; the ever present Quora “answers” much too self-servingly utilized, for possible want of an anti-Occam alternative, the brief version “conveniently” devoid of date.
The legion-of-aspiring-powers outlawed and busted the evil western banks; replacing them with trustworthy Wadi'ah and Amanah. Sure, that crashed the DOW even more than Dubya did, but I was able to get out before it had erased all prior gains.
When I can avoid the silly nostalgia I am certain that I am quite happier to be humble Ralph Modesto; my humble family of three, counting yeztruly, my wife Alice and son James, but not Sammy the boarder, now residing on Humble Lane, in a hovel in the development called Humble Hovels, which is situated in the borough of Humbletown, in the state of Humility, in the Delphic Islamic Squealing State of the United States (DISSUS), formerly known as the United States of America, now still commonly referred to as Rogue State, and still seen, albeit only
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partially, as the rich white terrorist country it was once considered in its entirety. I appreciate my new non-sentient job at the crematorium. All I have to do is remember to put on the gloves, as like humans, some of these flattened animal carcasses they bring in have maggots and other gross parasites. I throw them in the oven, turn on the gas, check my gloves, and relax; as I’m now free to space out on quantum quantums until they bring in the next batch of bodies.
Could it really have been the Schwinn-Finke event? Or it could be something I’m not even aware of?
Suddenly it struck me that if the terrorist charges were because of the underground parties, then Alice could have been charged too. If that was the case; for the sake of little James, we’d have to make some kind of arrangements for him if we were both going to become members of the “disappeared” at the same time. We’d have to communicate somehow, but I wonder if we’re being constantly filmed and recorded through our smart phones or other ways. ......... Maybe we’d have to pass hand-written encrypted notes like we did a long time ago. ......... I’ll have to think about that.
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James returned, saying that he was riding his new scooter around in the garage until he got dizzy. I was saddened in how that suggested James acceptance of a wobbly limitation for the benefit of the entire family. I figured that it was a good time to tell him some things he should know, just in case the forces of Sharia soon find me a forever home, away from the madding crowd.
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An Explanation
“Have a seat before you fall on your head. Let me try to explain what has been going on in the world, kid. ........
Ooops. That won’t require stitches. ........... I think.”
“They teach us all that stuff in grammar school, dad.”
Relieved, I continued; “No, I mean like politics, immigration, social studies, and stuff like that.”
“I understand that that’s covered in college.”
“You might die before you get there. So, pay attention.
This is the real thing. The crucial parts happened before you were born, and is absent from any approved, Muslim controlled school curriculum. It’s difficult to make sense of a comedy of errors, but a little history lead-in might help. See, when the British came to America, the Injuns said; ‘These goddam Teabags are going to fuck up the place. Mark my words. There’s nothing
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that can be done but to lock up your daughters.’ When the Irish came to America the Injuns and Teabags said; ‘These goddam Green Niggers are going to fuck up the place. Mark my words. There’s nothing that can be done but to lock up your daughters.’ When the Polish came to America the Injuns, Teabags, and Green Niggers said; ‘These goddam Polaks are going to fuck up the place. Mark my words. There’s nothing that can be done but to lock up your daughters.’ When the Italians came to America the Injuns, Teabags, Green Niggers, and Polaks said; ‘These goddam W.O.P.’s are going to fuck up the place. Mark my words. There’s nothing that can be done but to lock up your daughters.’
Getting my drift, son? See the obvious pattern? It’s continual. There’s a natural flow to these things which only professors at universities can’t understand; that possibly a naïve compliment to their self-interested rendition of ‘If I Had a Hammer,’ conveniently leaving off for the following ‘I’d plant it in my forehead’ part. And it all more or less worked out, with some minor quaint and comical flare-ups reported by the guilty, rich, white nerd brigade at National Public Radio. Like the time the undergraduate Princeton University black students felt a need to demonstrate that they were ‘down wit da bruthas in da hood,’ and got all up in arms over their discovery that
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there was one street in liberal Princeton Borough which may or may not have born the name of an alleged slave owner, and closed down Nassau Street for three consecutive Sunday hours, boldly impinging upon the starting times of an untold number of remnant tennis matches in private side street courts.
Back here on earth, the Muslim immigration began when poor, non-violent Muslims needed to flee their Arabian home countries because of the intolerable persecution performed upon them by their home grown, Saudi financed, ISIS thugs and indiscriminate drone strikes authorized by US First Muslim in Chief, Barack Obama, their military admitted death totals consisting 70% of innocent victims.
Now, pay rapt attention, boy. Here’s the deviation; the key error.”
“Dad, they teach that in school too; but they don’t call it an error anymore.”
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“I’ll pretend that you’re joking with your old man and laugh. Hahaha. Before they even got there, the European Union Western Europeans welcomed the poor, non-violent, migrating Muslims with open arms, especially compelled to do so, as a result of having been ‘morally’ induced to be indignantly critical of their long distance perception of Donald Trump and the US treatment of Mexican immigrants; as if it had any difference from the unilateral edict generated policies, decreed by their darling prior US First Muslim in Chief, Barack Obama.
His unsupported Presidential edicts were solely the lack of will endemic to cowards confronted by thousands of thugs carrying concealed box cutters. The would-be-Grand-Mufti-for-life with crooked elephant ears rumored to be capable of flight, was continually unable to obtain the approval of either house of congress about anything. In fact, many more Mexicans migrated to the US under Trump, no doubt the result of available jobs, which did not exist during the Obama reign.”
“Can a Mufti issue a fatwah?”
“An Ayatollah can.”
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“Then why wouldn’t he want to be an Ayatollah? Fatwahs are cool.”
“I didn’t say that a Mufti couldn’t. I don’t know. Ask your school Imam.”
“You should have said ‘I don’t know’ first. It’s okay not to know everything.”
“Yes. Thank you. But, we’re digressing a bit. Let me get back to the ‘kind-hearted’ Western European arbiters of morality. Instead of saying the time proven, working words when the Muslim immigrants began their trek; ‘These goddam Cairo Coons are going to fuck up the place. Mark my words. There’s nothing that can be done but to lock up your daughters,’ the Eurotrash instead said; ‘Welcome, friend. Please allow us to roll out the red carpet. Is there anything we can do or provide to make you feel more comfortable in your new home? Please meet our daughters.’ Hearing this, the ISIS thugs, financed by the Saudi royal family, whose primary goal was to put as much distance between themselves and these ultra-violent assholes as
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possible, joined the march. Like any semi-sentient predator would have concluded, they thought on the first hand; ‘It is sometimes prudent to buy some insurance,’ and on the second;
‘Allahu akbar! We can take these suckers for plenty.’
As a result, the poor, non-violent Muslims were accompanied on their now non-escaping trudge by the very same thugs they were trying to escape from. Their difficulty in saying that is the subject of another speech. Suffice to partially say that it is difficult to break from those incorrectly seen as the same in an environment which may not recognize differentiation. In addition, unsupervised ISIS thugs have a strong penchant for raping, chopping heads, and semi-organized crime done in the name of Allah.
Got that James? I know this is much too early to be giving the important facts of life to one so tender in years. But, I figured one never knows how long they have and I was impressed with your precocious, multi-tasked flip-offs of that Joseph Finke closet informant case. ........... Bear with me. I think that I’m at the end.
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Within a week after the arrival of the migrants, the European Union’s Muslim loving flagellants said; ‘Uh oh. We have a problem here of the deepest doo-doo proportion. But, in the interest of a possible solution, let’s make it a criminal offense to say that we do. Since most of the US has been subjected to some degree of higher learning provided by the university professor Libbies, and are at least moderately embarrassed by having elected the Trumps, they are ripe to likely buy into any liberal-one-world doctrine thrown their way, and we’ll pawn the ultra-violent Muslims off on their mostly state school, undistinguished, professorially initiated,
‘educationally’ fluffed, Trump-Mexican guilty derrieres.’
Logical, right? Animals instinctively hide whatever problem they are able to. Worth a shot at the very least when cornered by bomb-crazed practitioners of extortion. Anybody got a better plan short of the longshot of a redirected Hitler II packed with other attractive ideas about genocide? .......... Didn’t think so. So, with the US having burned their last Conservative
‘witch,’ Ann Coulter, at the stake of Libby controlled ‘social’
media, instead of saying the time proven, working words when the immigrants came; ‘These goddam Cairo Coons are going to fuck up the place. Mark my words. There’s nothing that can be done but
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to lock up your daughters,’ the racially mixed US, in a pathetic attempt to ape their ‘morally superior,’ Western European partial progenitors, instead said; ‘Welcome, friend. Please allow us to roll out the red carpet. Is there anything we can do or provide to make you feel more comfortable in your new home?
Please meet our daughters.’ Hearing this, the ISIS thugs, financed by the Saudi royal family, whose primary goal was to put as much distance between themselves and these ultra-violent assholes as possible, joined the march. Like any semi-sentient predator would have concluded, they thought on the first hand;
‘It is sometimes prudent to buy some insurance,’ and on the second; ‘Allahu akbar! We can take these suckers for plenty.’
As a result, the poor, non-violent Muslims were accompanied on their second attempted escape trek by the very same thugs they were trying to escape from for a second time. Their difficulty in saying that is the subject of another speech.
Suffice to partially say that it is difficult to break from those incorrectly seen as the same in an environment which may not recognize differentiation. In addition, unsupervised ISIS
thugs have a strong penchant for raping, chopping heads, and semi-organized crime done in the name of Allah.
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As the sorry population of the EU had hoped, the naïve and Mexican ‘guilty’ US was again duped into importing Western Europe’s miscalculated bloopers, and unfortunately my tiny and dizzy son, you have lived in the ensuing garbage. The Injuns should have remained with the time proven, working words before the perennial flow of confident, reinvigorated immigrants came;
“These goddam Teabags are going to fuck up the place. Mark my words. There’s nothing that can be done but to lock up your daughters.” Instead the US megaphone armed Libbies progressively said; ‘Welcome, friend. Please allow us to roll out the red carpet. Is there anything we can do or provide to make you feel more comfortable in your new home? Please meet our daughters.’
Hearing this, the ISIS thugs joined the march financed by the Saudi royal family, who want to put as much distance between themselves and these ultra-violent assholes as possible. Like any semi-sentient predator would have concluded, they thought on the first hand; ‘It is sometimes prudent to buy some insurance,’
and on the second; ‘Allahu akbar! We can take these suckers for plenty.’ As a result, the poor, non-violent Muslims were accompanied on their now non-escaping trudge by the very same thugs they were trying to escape from for the second time. Their difficulty in saying that is the subject of another speech.
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Suffice to partially say that it is difficult to break from those incorrectly seen as the same in an environment which may not recognize differentiation. In addition, unsupervised ISIS
thugs have a strong penchant for raping, chopping heads, and performing semi-organized crime done in the name of their interpretation of ‘Allah.’
That may sound familiar, and it should. But history has this boring tendency to repeat itself. That is your heritage, primarily supplied by a guilt driven tolerance of
‘disenfranchised’ Arabians; illegal to say that they may have chosen their ‘disenfranchisement’ through their historically documented inability to live at peace anywhere, anyhow, even with each other, and under any circumstances. Syrian forces once entered a war, only because at the time, they had no one else to fight with. That was their official word.
Son, even if that seems objectionable or overly long, hear this. If you choose to break out of your cell before serving your entire sentence, you will not find happiness. You’ll have the hounds of hell on your tail for eternity. It will be tempting, as it is not very difficult to use your key in the
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jail’s lock, and no one will stop you. Most jailers are not even looking, and those who are will pretend not to be, hoping that you will ............ See son, if you can use your gift of patience, and wait until the jailer frees you, you will be rewarded with an eternity of happiness.”
“You sure of that?”
“No. That requires the faith part.”
“Oh.”
“Well. There’s also a bit of forbidden logic there. You see, the easy, early escape is a guaranty of hell hound companionship forever. So, patience might be a bad bet, but the other one is guaranteed to be one. ......... And remember, there was no one party which turned in, prosecuted, and killed Jesus.
It was done by representatives of all of ‘humanity.’”
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“Right, dad. Perhaps you might direct me to the most salient part, the part which has the most potential of being a virally liked Twitter tweet.”
“Well, if you insist upon a further distillation, more or less, kid; regarding the observable story, there’s always a choice, like it or not. The aggregate regurgitation might well entitle you to the prestige and zero remuneration associated with an underground Breitbart News op-ed; the ‘Allahu-akbar-type’ of ‘satisfaction.’ The ‘we can take these suckers for plenty’ part is actually pretty good for a bumper sticker or Twitter tweet, but that introduces the inevitable ‘necessity’ of a more generalistic discussion-soliloquy than either of us care to engage; as it will require interminable explanation to those who don’t understand sarcasm. So, if you so choose; mind, never mind, partially mind, or shove it all the way up the Muslim ruled, EU duped, former US, Libbie indoctrinated, collectively humble ass. To be brutally honest, beyond the possible effects upon you and Mom, I don’t really care if these goddam Cairo Coons continue to fuck up the place,” the statement designed to be as sufficiently condensed as that required by an effectively dumbed down, self-congratulatory, ‘cool,’ partying loser; they almost clandestinally contained within that BS solipsism,
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perhaps true for their chosen brand of limitation. At any rate nothing worth bothering with, however you slice it. That immediately obvious baloney, short changed posture, a prior inadequacy replete with an attempted cover up, if guessing at the meta presentation of one seeking in ease to instill, as substantially opposed to that of one confined at the most inconsistently consistent at the most annoying level of defined coherence; that taken, rightfully and wrongfully, as a substantial comfort, conducive to the long term acceptance of the provided structure; humanity’s over-riding skill; not that one which is complimentarily feigned as being mentally superior, while all potential demonstrations of that fantasy are self-interpreted by ‘humans’ as soundlessly absurd in favor of an ability to adapt to anything, which indirectly but surely consistently suggest an otherwise destructive ‘logic’ based will to a power, which never satisfies. Regarding the less easily observed route; ‘Let it be’ seems to be the governing principle.”
“You get out much these days?”
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“Certainly. My time at and trips to the crematorium speak for themselves.”
James said; “I’m going back to the garage to ride my scooter in circles.”
“Good idea.”
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Ruminations
I try not to think about it, as the more I do the angrier I get. It’s a weird kind of anger, as it’s not for me, at least not much. I’d like to tell Alice about it, but know that if I do she’ll be a nervous wreck. But, it’s more of an anger that those Deepstate anti-terrorist drones I hear overhead at night might hit Alice and James. In Iraq, 70% of those killed are innocent victims. Stupid drone will probably manage to kill them and leave me here in solitude, initially that best adjectively described as bent and vengeful at best, though much too susceptible to the diatribes of the suppliers of suicide bomb apparatus; and wrongful at the currently indefinable worst.
......... but best wrongful, thereby seen as an overwhelmingly
“human” desire of the attractive, uncorrectable sort.
That would eventually result in an intolerance and the birth of a real, white terrorist of the popular sort; that also characterized as an Hitlerian view, conveniently and pragmatically adopted by all the stimuli possible in the jokey
“sophistication” of a now insignificant version of the Europe, which claims all the “credentials” attendant to a potentiality consistent with that of a train which has stopped after losing
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its engine. If you so worship Islam, you didn’t have to wait for its practitioners to bring it to you. You can fly to Syria. The ISIS monkey asses have not yet figured out how to work the RIM-66 Standard to shoot down planes.
I mean, it’s bad enough that they can’t have the things people, ostensibly previous candidates for a “largesse” no longer offered at first negotiation, took for granted not all that long ago, that it is absolutely retarded to draw any correlation between, and without the pretense of humor, say that James having a bicycle has anything to do with starvation in Africa. And sometimes I wonder if this is Deepstate inflicted.
Maybe it’s a false flag operation. The Trumps have been out of office more than two years now. They had a long time to make America great, and/or work again, with their fingers in the dykes of Islam. I’ll never know how, with Europe’s proven problems, we decided to do the same thing. Belatedly, I have this helpful how-to list I downloaded from wikihow.com.
Ways to Deter Muslim Aggression
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1) Put on a Ms. Piggy mask and charge.
2) Point out that had Muhammed not had a horrendous childhood in Arabia, he’d undoubtedly have been a Jewish Rabbi.
3) Confuse them with weapons technology in excess of that which requires the correct pushing of more than one button in succession.
4) Tell the Israelis that they are close to a nuclear capability.
5) Offer them a 7-11 franchise in the US with no down payment.
6) Distract and excite them with a white, made-up, twinky in a mini.
7) Run a raffle for season’s passes to Demolition Derby.
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8) Raise tent prices.
9) Move to a sanctuary city. D.I.S.S.U.S. sanctuary cities proliferate from New Canaan, Connecticut to Carmel, California.
Heavy recent demand from rich white terrorists have pushed prices into the tens of millions. Goodwill entrances in adjoining towns are clogged three deep by protected rich whites trying to sell investment advice. “My good man; we’re just trying to work.”
10) If of more modest means, joining one of their evening patrols which harass scantily clad white women might convince them that you have become one of them.
My concentration was broken when Alice returned from her immigrant baby-sitting job at the Humbletown Social Services Center wearing her contraband Jordache jeans. Totally un-nerved, I greeted her with; “You should have known better! Dammit, Alice, you should have known better by now!”
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“What? There is not yet any rule that I have to feed them out of my own pocket.”
“No, no, no. Designer pants. ........ And tight, Israeli distributed ones too. You can be arrested for that.”
“I’m sorry. I was rushing and was on the border of missing the last bus, and just grabbed whatever was on top.”
“That’s not a good excuse. You should have taken the designer label off your jeans long before. I mean Jordache?
Everyone knows that they are expensive; and worse are owned by Israeli Jews. Jesus!”
“ .................. “
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“For James’ sake, I’m going to take a chance that you won’t rat me out, and tell you that I’ve been charged with terrorism of some sort.”
“What did you do this time, Ralph?”
“I don’t know. They don’t tell you and I’m not supposed to tell anyone else of the nothing I know. That would insure another charge.”
“ ............... “
“Okay. My best guess is that nosy Joe Finke informed the authorities about James’ bike or scooter or that someone in the Friday night group is an informant. Or maybe Amaway on Steroids routinely reported my purchase of that Tommy Robinson poster.”
D.I.S.S.U.S. 2030
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Tommy Robinson poster; property of the author.
“I told you that you shouldn’t.”
“Well, you know. I mean, you can’t run from everything. It could even be that sarcastic joke I made about FIDE being a racist organization, for never having recognized any black or Muslim chess grandmaster.”
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“Well, whatever. I’ll be right by your side.”
“Oh no. You were charged too?”
“No, no. At least not as of an hour ago. I just mean that I’ll be standing by my man. Smootch. Smootch.”
“No, you can’t. That would show that I ‘illegally’ told someone.”
“In spirit, lover.”
“ ...................... “
“This is Muslim fascism, aided and abetted by dumb, cowardly white scum.”
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“Tell me about it. It’s more retarded then the norm. You know Kerry at work?”
“From what you’ve told me.”
“We get along fine and one day I chanced saying; ‘All this bullshit about equality was just a ruse to get white women.’ He surprised me and got serious saying; ‘No. I don’t even feel comfortable around white people.’ We both paused a while before he added; ‘It’s not like they’re being openly racist, but they go so far to assure me that black is all right with them, it is indirectly so. I’m not asking for their fucking approval. My black existence does not require their authorization, yet it would be ‘rude’ to point that out when they continually tell me that they have black people in their neighborhood and that their kids play with the ‘others.’” “They’re probably trying to be re-assuring,” I inserted. “In most cases, and that’s what makes the whole situation impossible. Hundreds of years of shit has happened, fault on both sides; mostly yours. It’s not going to be corrected in a couple of decades. So, chill out, you know. In the meantime please forgive me for being over sensitively Afro-
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centric.’” “That seems a small request relative to prior demands.” “Fuck you.” “Yes, true equality.”
“What does that have to do with your potential Abu Grabby vacation?”
“Everything and nothing.”
“ ................ “
“Your position is clear. Okay. The fascists have some legally unmentionable problem with me. I love you; kissy, kissy; so I risked telling you. ......... That’s kind of it. You know where the tin can with the money is. Right?”
“Yeah. You know, that’s not the point; the ........ “
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“Love you, babe. That’s what I hoped. But if my hopes were unfounded, I still wanted you to know where the money was.”
“I did! It’s you and your lack of focus that I’m concerned with.”
“You’re the greatest, babe.”
Cuddle.
Cuddle.
I said; “So, it wasn’t you who ratted me out after all.”
“You really think that you’re funny. Don’t you?”
“No and yes. ....... Sort of depends on the context. ......
Sorry. ........ So?”
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“Umma Gumma. ..... You think you’ll be getting water boarded?”
“Umma Gumma.”
“I got the kid and the buried money.”
“Soul mate.”
Cuddle, cuddle.
Cuddle, cuddle.
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Norton Barges In
Disturbing our cuddles and reverie, I heard a rap-rap-rap, pause, more insistent rap rap-rap, longer pause, rappity rap at my front door. I didn’t need the intrusion at a time of blithe thought, but then I heard; “Hey, hey, Ralphie boy. I know you’re in there. Open up.” Without a locked door complemented by the immediate access to a loaded and ready pistol, I couldn’t think of any other faux civil option.
Norton. My pal, Norton. Damn. I said; “The door is open.
Come on in,” in an ironic tone not meant to be encouraging to unannounced, semi-breakers-in, but somewhat semi-tempered by a resignation meant to sound as if it was capable of coping; at least on a strained semi-social basis.
Too dumb or determined; thereby unaffected one way or the other, Norton re-adjusted his sideways hat, while he came in saying; “I didn’t want to be rude man, but I’d like to be the first to extend my congratulations on being the current Islamic rude boy celebrity. ....... Kudos, kudos,” adding a Carson-type
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genuflection fully replete with the full hand-head-chest-belly wiggly.
“ ....................... “
“ ....................... “
“You’re one of them.”
“Oh sure; I mean like Goggle knows everything, with their spyware in every PC; and worse they talk like yentas on steroids, even when no one asks them to.”
“ .............. “
“Ha, ha Ralphie boy. Ya gotta get up on the techie stuff a bit. There are no more secrets.”
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“The e-mail said ............ “
“Yeah, right. The e-mails also say their pills can give you a foot long dick. ........ Sorry, Alice.”
Alice shrugged before I did.
“The good news is that you probably won’t end up in Abu Grabby. But, just in case you do, I’m here to say that I’m volunteering to look after Alice for you.” Wink. Wink. “Sweet stuff.”
Tentative smirk, intended to convey whatever the observer would like it to. “You’re a pal, Norton. Why is it that I am just unable to dismiss the possibility that my best ‘friend’
might be my worst enemy? Could it possibly be that the notion is just too standard and trite?”
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“Ignorance, Ralphie boy. Innocent ignorance. No aspersions on your challenged head cast. Blessed by Goggle and my sewer job, I get to see where all the rubbish comes out every day. It floats for all to see just as well as a viral Twitter tweet or a rat carcass. ........ No big thing. Just kinda like how the bookies become reasonably conversant in all the odds.”
“Norton, you are some semblance of an adequate, expected man, and I am honored to know you. ....... Just for Alice’s anticipated benefit, please tell us. Do you wash?”
Raising his left arm, Norton said; “Wanna huff?”
“I trust ya, buddy.”
Norton nodded, again adjusted his cap, and exited the way he came in.
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Ralph looked at Alice, who said; “Your buddy does wonders for mood.”
“Yeah, he’s a regular purveyor of peremptory pulchritudinal pleasing.”
“So, still wanna?”
“Check it on Goggle. They know everything.”
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The Unofficial History of DISSUS
Like most countries, entities, sub-divisions, notwithstanding the Picasso and Cubist flavored approach now incorrectly seen as a Derrida nuanced abstraction, insistent and numerous irrelevances, and easily disputed errata, D.I.S.S.U.S.
was founded a long time ago, had its infancy undermined in a much too hurriedly, cursorily, fleetingly, and non-consensually based coupling with some sense of ostensible interdependence in mind, exactly like the under-age white girls Muslim thugs
“groom,” the open mention of which gets one a cell adjoining
“right-wing-racist” Tommy Robinson. The Illuminalibtardi must have simultaneously and en masse gotten some sort of perverse kick out of that; strongly supported by Millennial social-media-hogs with as much common sense as a turkey who drops in to say
“hi” the day before Thanksgiving. They have taken credit for coining the popular, “brilliant” two word phrase; OLD SCHOOL.
The ponderous detailed wherewithal was most kindly interpreted as a temporary whim most mathematically associated with a notion of a clandestination, at best an inordinately biased confession to either a disturbed notion of a contestably unbalanced, protagonistic need to compete for the fleeting
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prominence afforded to every forgettable, hit parade flash or an ADD related challenge of memorizing what comes after 1.
Seemingly important in the moment, adjustments followed in their detailed lack of substance. Details may be found all over the web in two distinct varieties; libtard and fascist, insofar as the groups still consider themselves unalike.
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Trump, Jr. on Hooey Sterno
They were broadcasting on BrightBart Private Radio from an inner compartment of the yacht “Black Medallion Box.” The yacht was on loan from Robert Murder, making it tax-deductible in the former US of fucking A and the current batch of shithole countries aspiring to step into the Illuminitardi-Muslim-Mexican induced void. 76 year old Hooey Sterno got as serious as a destitute, long term unemployed, radio DJ is employer required to be plus an estimated practical margin of “comfortable” error; that rough, below-the-radar calculation intended to approximate the projected and projectile results of the universally accepted personalized capital asset pricing model. It was arguably spasmodic as well as sarcastically coincidental that a dinghy with no discernable passengers on deck, bearing a plagiarized Pinta-Nina-Santa Marie moniker, sailed on by un-noticed in the dark, murky, and turbulent international waters two nautical miles from the petty rebellion advertised by the “Mar-a-Lago-Pay-for-Play” neon, color co-ordinated lights, as if it was a blind, darkness-seeking ghost, in retreat from any sort of test designed to measure abilities to color differentiate, and thoroughly uninterested in trying to convince anyone that the indigo is on the flip side of the vermillion. Least of the most unbelievable of vices-cum-versas, namely how the unseen common
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courtesy wave of a silence is conveniently misconstrued as the non-argument which had been “legally” abolished by the Illuminilibtardi anyway, which is how the “revolution” more resembles a regurgitation of the etiquette/manners column popularized at some once un-rememberable point by former Zeitgeist darling, Ann Landers; rather than anything of Che, Karl, or Zapata. Hello. ........ Hello. ......... Hello, hello, hello. With the lights out .................. .
Hooey said; “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. This is your
#1, BrightBart Private Radio jock on the waves once again, shock-and-awe specialist, Hooey Sterno, with my trusty sidekick Artless, bringing you everything that the Muslim-Illuminilibtardi coalition has deemed either gauchely inappropriate or expressly forbidden, as they aspire to speak and act in the name of Allah, for our poor benefit. Dumb schmucks like that just always beg rebuke. Don’t they? .......
What sayest thou, Artless?”
Artless said; “Oh, right. Like uh, say something brilliant, and bail out the bankrupted chief flunky. If you haven’t noticed, this nautical two miles still remains a social democracy;
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burdens shared correspondingly in words and lopsidedly in pictures, schwantz face.”
Hooey said; “All right. All right. You need a fix, but for our listeners who may not be interested in the cantankerous blurbs of a thick and obese, timeworn junkie, we are proud to have previous President of the US of Fucking A on the line, Donald Trump, Jr. For those of you who may have forgotten or like me, weren’t paying any attention, Don Jr. followed his dad’s eight year term as US of Fucking A Comedian in Chief, with what became a transitionary, serious, and IDEAS impeded Presidential term, for the four tumultuous years between 2024 and 2028. During those years, not only did every Mexican, Central and South American who could walk and knew north from south traipse into the unprotected mainland formerly known as the US of fucking A, with all of the ‘justified’ veracity of those who boorishly absconded with previously sympathetic and tolerant Dr. Zhivago’s house; every goddamned Muslim in Britain and western Europe was flown into Mexico at the expense of the Saudi Royal Family. The Royals and their friends understandably want to keep their distance from violent, low-end scum. Okay, some including King Salman, understood; but the rich Saudis have to dump them ALL at our border? There are others. From there the Q-Tip heads worked
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like illegal wetbacks and proceeded to the shallow river in droves, to wade across the muddy and shallow waters of the Rio Grande, and spread out here like the 7-11’s in all bipty states.
Donald Jr. claimed that his efforts were hampered by an Illuminilibtardi congress coupled with an un-co-operative, unelected, some would say diabolic and disproportionally powerful horde of Dem appointed, fossilized octogenarian federal judges, purportedly still among the living, and triaged by the naïve collusion demonstrated by the ‘contractually bound to the ever expanding interlocking thesaurus, updated twice daily by the PCP
of the controlled and controlling members and dupes of the mainstream cable media farts. Donald Trump, Jr.’s speeches and behavior became seen as increasingly irrational; comparisons drawn to Caligula’s ‘decadent’ reaction to his naively infanticidic attempt to establish a theoretically inherent democracy’s demonstrated ability to transcend its own common absurdity, which became some sort of perverse and covertly retrograde score card, later judged by the absurdly never existent standard of a Nostradamus in clarity as if it was his fault that he and his sister lacked the ability to predict the future, or even the present .............. “
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Donald Jr. interrupted and said; “Yeah, yeah Hooey. You’ve taken all my lines. So what can I say? But, I’m kind of disinterested in all that shit right now anyway. Know what I mean? You’re sounding like one of my late term speeches to the drooling base.
Old news and fuckemall now. Hehe. Bottom line; their loss and I still got mine. The thing was that unless I had invoked martial law, simultaneously declaring an occupational policing war on Mexico, combined with a banning of the Muslim Fascisti, as not permitted by the media-controlling Illuminilibtardi, annoyingly supplemented by the said octagenarian, federally appointed judicial, bounds-dis-respective law makers, any one of the unelected hundreds of which was ‘legally’ sufficient to derail any of my initiatives. The highly predictable result was that in the absence of sustained white initiative, an obscenely doctrinaire Muslim-brown ignorance would prevail, as just a few years have conclusively shown that it undoubtedly did. I mean, to the credit of the Illuminilibtardi on a basis I have to consider as a good guess or a throw-enough-shit-at-the-wall thing, the odds against pulling all that off was something like gazillions to one. ...... So, in retrospect, I guess I should have taken dad’s humorous approach more seriously; but you know that youthful need to rebel shit. Right? ...... In all fairness, I can say that my “Make America Work Again” derivative program has fulfilled the larger promise intended; as I personally
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didn’t do too badly with the sale of those red emblazoned baseball hats with the stretchy things in back. Were he still here, I have no doubt that dad would have been proud.”
Hooey said; “You are still a most serious fellow.”
Donald Jr. said; “I’ll gratefully place that assessment right alongside all the other stupid and incorrect, safe statements deserving of my respect. Consider. Like dad, I’ve been the subject of libelous and distasteful false news rendered by the Illuminilibtardi controlled media machine, as well as 85 year old Mueller’s continual investigation of my supposed involvement with those Obama-Clinton planted Russian oligarchs in dad’s campaign back in 2016. ........ The continuing jibes made me strongly relate to Little Anthony and the Imperials’ ’Tears on MY Pillow.’ But, I toughed it out for the love of my good fellow Americans. This entire bullshit isn’t about me; it’s about you; the people. Now, I’m quite okay, despite Dr. Phil’s hands off public diagnosis.”
Hooey said; “So, what now Don?”
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Donald Jr. said; “Well, in an attempt to diligently keep up to date, I’m undergoing a violent personal consternation regarding the Sunni and Shia divergence. Why can’t we all be friends in our one and only world? Yet, it still seems as if one must take a side. Having the contemporary leader a family member or just a tribe member is an issue which many righteously find mayhem worthy, either outlook essentially an anti-democratic, Antifa consistent statement; that even more impressive when done by those most obviously historically mayhem disposed. So, I’ve been in almost daily contact with many of the prorogued British Members of Parliament, and thus far I’m leaning toward the Shia stance, if and when an agreement can be worked out with the Sunnis, which will opt for the Shia estimated benefits, but not negate the Sunni advantages currently inherent therein.”
Hooey said; “So, your ideology has, like D.I.S.S.U.S, turned Muslim?”
Donald Jr. said; “You must be kidding. Do you pay attention to anything other than the cue cards written for you? For me, Islam
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is not a religion; just a looting technique; like the Visigoth
‘migration,’ in brown face.”
Artless yelled out; “Sure, just the current replay. Fucking Hooey can be so goddam stupid.”
Hooey said; “Artie; you wanna be sent to your lower deck cabin?
You know, you’re only here because I felt sorry for your unemployed old ass, and insisted so to the head man at BrightBart Private Radio.”
Artless said; “Yeah, right. Like you got the balls to insist anything of Murder. If he didn’t want me I wouldn’t be here. End of story.”
Hooey said; “Sorry, Don. Artless is in a bad, impractical spirit right now; fixable with a little spoonful. Apologies for the late-coming, loud-mouthed, suck-up; who would have been institutionalized for his own good in other times. Please continue.”
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Donald Jr. said; “Yes, a technique; a technique which successfully relies on the majority public inability to see the present as an alternatively costumed replay of the past. But, unlike much which can be later seen as an innocuous teransient fascination with hula hoops, one might say ........... .
Artless monotoned his next interjection; “Yes, yes, my good man.
By very definition, a necessarily incomplete list of further negative points of the 2028 Zeitgeist are excluded, and they include, but are not limited to;
1) A silly penchant to attempt to fight fire with fire.
2) A fascist requirement, which necessitates that members adopt ALL of their dogma-propaganda; ostensibly seeing their totality as the summation of a good Godly manifestation.
3) A more specific redundancy with 2); making a crime of any semblance of ‘free’ speech; again ostensibly unaware that their chosen ‘dictate’ is the impossible imposition of a one sided coin.
4) Of most personal significance to me, their prolific interest in lunch and substance habits, while cowardly afraid to comment
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on what is arguably the most significant evil of the last 100
years; the military-industrial complex.
In other words they get an A on stated intent, despite ‘leaders’
obvious primary love of ‘power,’ and a periodic goof up of the easy parts; but something less than an F on Methodology, Priority Assignation, Planning, Execution, Tolerance, Magnaminity, and Originality. A debased PhD granted, due to the biased grantor's recognition of having the personal stupidity to display one specific of his personal ignorance through assessing an infant by an adult standard. Will someone please bring in the clowns or play some music worthy of a Bandstand 9, because it has a good beat and you can dance to it.”
Hooey said; “Who the fuck asked you anything, Artless? Need I again remind you that you’re not on this show as a star or interesting guest? Okay? You can be replaced with a cheap, old laugh machine.”
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Artless mumbled; “Murder likes me better than you.”
Accentuating Hooey’s chastisement of Artless, Donald Jr. said;
“And what are you talking about, anyway Artless?”
Artless said; “The twenty-first century Millennial manifestation of the Illumnilibtardi. Weren’t we all, compadre?”
Hooey said; “ .......................... “
Donald Jr. said; “ .......................... “
Artless said; “Well, if no one knows what they’re talking about, we should all just shut the fuck up.”
Donald Jr. said; “ .............. “
D.I.S.S.U.S. 2030
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Hooey said; “ ................ Hmmnnnn; that approach doesn’t work all that well on radio. ....... Hey; to bridge the gap, let’s play D.I.S.S.U.S.’ new national anthem. It’s a shame our listeners cannot appreciate the visuals. Doing it, here they are; the #1 D.I.S.S.U.S. group, as they appeared at the last, as in final, Super Bowl opening, right after the GoDaddy, largest domain registrant, and periodic applicant for a justifying associate-Nielsen, here are ‘The Four Boxcutters!’”
Faht da Wat Powa
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O bes train, bes brain
Bes solja, ain’ta faht?
Is me whatta say
Dey rada bitch dan blitz.
Git down on it
Wit yo fahn funky self.
Brudda an sista heart explode
Hittin, hittin in da soul
Gonna faht da wat powa
Gonna faht da wat powa
Sang it loud
Ya gots ta sang it proud. C’mon
Lemmy hear yo sang
Faht da wat powa. Lemmy hear yo sang
Gonna faht da wat powa
Gonna faht da wat powa
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Gonna faht da wat powa
Gonna faht da wat powa dat we.
Elvis be a redneck honk
Key stole ow shit
An ow conk
Elvis be a redneck honk
Key stole ow shit
An ow conk
Yeah ...... Yeah!
String him up
Nex ta da Duke we wup
String him up
Nex ta da Duke we wup
Yeah ...... Yeah!
Lemmy hear yo sang
Faht da wat powa. Lemmy hear yo sang
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Gonna faht da wat powa
Gonna faht da wat powa
Gonna faht da wat powa
Gonna faht da wat powa dat we.
Foxy revalootion groan
No matta wat yo collah
Les it be pasty wat
Dat ain no true collah
Watchore pace face say
Thass raht
Yo wup
No madda
Cos now we sang
Faht da wat powa
Faht da wat powa. Lemmy hear yo sang
Gonna faht da wat powa
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Gonna faht da wat powa
Gonna faht da wat powa
Gonna faht da wat powa dat we.
Upwards on the horizon
rises the eastern sun, The light in the eyes
of the believers in justice,
Bahman is the zenith of our faith.
Your message, O Imam, of independence,
freedom, is imprinted on our souls.
O Martyrs! Your clamours echo in the ears of time.
Enduring, continuing, and eternal.
D.I.S.S.U.S. 2030
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The Four Boxcutters and “Faht the Wat Powa” by Ice Pee; property of the author.
“Thank you, once again Boxboys. ............... Whatever.”
said a seemingly mystified, but pleased Alemayehu Ziehirim.
Alemayehu Ziehirim; the kind courtesy of Pexels.com under their CC0 license; modified.
Hooey said; “Catchy tune. No?”
Artless said; “Can’t stop my feet from uncontrollably jigging.“
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Don Jr. said; “I took a knee.“
Hooey said; “Yes, I understand that can do wonders for an otherwise terminated career. But, I guess that the details are invariably a bore; though we can all sing and presumably dance to ‘Faht da wat powa.’ ....... Wrong again. .... So, Donny, I hate this type of question; so under the circumstances I’ll ask it of you. What do you consider the greatest accomplishment of your four years in office, and what was the greatest failure?
All fingers out of throats, please.”
Don Jr. said; “I’m really glad you asked that excellent question, Hooey; as that was the one I most expected and therefore almost spent the entirety of an exhaustive two minutes in preparation of my answer. You see, that the phrasing of the question seeks to put me in the losing position of either ridiculously saying that I made no mistakes or that I fucked up, with the obligation to provide an example which the Illiminilibtardi and their affiliated suck-ups will then program at length with attendant ‘expert’ comment on MSNBC, CNN, The Communist Workers Daily, and the like for a month with
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subsequent residual regurgitations permitted; indeed encouraged; on slow-news-days not marked by a democratic, small d, Twit.
Having established a preface; copyrighted, mind you, insofar as the legally ignorant are still intimidated by the term; I would have to say that my biggest accomplishment was winning the election in 2024 and my greatest failure was losing the election in 2028. I have the distinction of being the only living President to have lost an incumbent election, the last such person George H.W. Bush, before the flood in 1993, and almost a half century ago. The turkeys get used to most anything after a while. .............. On a personal basis; like a duh on the scintilla of un-detectable, performance enhancing drugs and crack that Biden’s kid used to score for me in Ukraine; that also the failure. ......... Kind of late in the game for this I suppose; but time is out of my control. So there it is. I will do my utmost to care where that is taken as for what it was intended; a humbled failure to the cause of Fascist Sharia.
Allah, please help all we sinners.”
Hooey said; “Preparation is the mutha of muthas. Itiswatititis, huh? So, for the benefit of the segment of our audience which may not yet be able to relate to that, I have to note that the likely interpretation of your reply, is like totes one hundred
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percent consistent with the traditional, incongruous, physicist view of calculated personal observation, re-observed, and re-observed to some sort of a conclusion which simultaneously ostracizes and reaffirms all aforementioned possible relevance of the water-heat-steam numbers, which prompted the thoughts of process and intent similarity, much in the manner in which ontology gurus try to equate cause and effect.”
Don Jr. said; “I think you’ve read and stolen my cue cards; so
................................... and so on.”
Artless said; “ ................. “
Hooey extended that to; “ .......................... “
Donny Jr. followed his own Trump suit and carelessly upped or downed the ante to some lengthened derivation of .........
saying; “The details of the chump change to the Muellers for further study.”
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Hooey said; “So that we don’t give our fans the fear that they’ve suddenly become privy; in the news today.
‘New York Times – Sunday, March 30, 2030
Phil Space – Staff Editorial Investigative Reporter Over the past week many extreme right wing, for want of a better and more accurate term, net media modules have been inundated with doctored photos and recapitulations of anonymous, anecdotally limited stories of people of color driving Bugatti Royales, Bugatti Venyons, Pagani Zonyas, Bentley Mulsanns, Ferrari Californias, Dartz Prombrons, Rolls-Royce Phantoms, some other funny looking cars, and even an everyday Mercedes with a misleadingly glorious ‘I am expensive’ bumper sticker, presumably just in case you might not know.
This reporter is here to tell you that there is not one bit of evidence yet in place to substantiate these racist claims, and find the irresponsible reporting of the Fox News Fair and Balanced Reporting website which contained the headline “Niggas Gassed at the Premium Tank” to be reprehensible in their inferences that hard working hip-hop stars have been Muslim exempted from compliance with the modesty codes imposed upon the rich white demons.
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This kind of hate speech is obviously an innuendoed, underhanded one, used to stir inferred, racially based discord through inverted KKK-type claims of discrimination, at the same time prompting the vile and ignorant, white supremacist demonstrations throughout southern D.I.S.S.U.S. towns where none of these vehicles exist, other than through the extra points granted ‘minorities’ in the civil service tests which have been Illuminilibtardi designed to permit no pre-socially-adjusted score of less than 100 to non-retards, effectively guarantying civil service jobs to those still benefitting from minority status sixty years after that legal ‘catch-up’ had been rightfully conveyed in a fine tuning, intended as a temporary in consideration of 400 years of empirically and anecdotally documented theft of services. Now, blacks have had their legitimate issue usurped by Muslims with none.
Racheted down, all al-Farooki, head of IDEAS southern DISSUS
branch could say was ‘DEMONS DEMONStrate.’ All we non-Farookis were further enlightened. Thank you once again, Al .........
whatever, this time.’
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In possible anticipation of a protracted silence, Hooey said;
“Much too obvious to be funny. Huh? Tough audience. Artless, you may not yet have noticed this, but the only reason you’re paid to be here is for your infectious laughter.”
Artless said; “Hahaha.”
Don Jr. said; “If I laugh, am I assured of a place in Murder’s Renaissance Technologies Medallion Fund?”
Hooey said; “Dunno. That’s between you and Murder. Can’t help thinking that you had a better shot when President.”
Don Jr. said; “Yeah. Shit’s undocumented anyway; the obvious beneficiary of AI generated rumor.”
Artless nearly waxed poetic, saying;
“’Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!” cries she With silent lips. “Give me your tired, your poor,
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Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door!’
In some quarters that is deemed to be Commie propaganda snuck into the Statue of Liberty many, many years after her French installation. The original statue had only one inscription;
‘July 4, 1776.’ Consider how the founding fathers issued the
‘Federalist Papers,’ as suggestion rather than law. Further consider what must surely be their current regrets.”
A backstage, union-represented, thereby foolishly secure commentator with a carelessly open mike used what sounded like a non-traditional sound-capable orifice to editorialize, adding;
“Braaaaaaaaaaaaaaappappaapap.”
Hooey said; “You guys backstage trying to upstage Artless again.
Easy target. He’s shaking in need of getting totally fucked.
Okay. Deserves it too, more or less. No big thing to me one way or the other. It’s all for the good of the paying, anti-
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progressive cause. But, con su permiso, let’s try to put this in a contemporary by way of perennial context; courtesy of forty-five very biased and un-footnoted heretics who post anonymously on one of the websites purporting to be truly informational, while negating that allegation through crowd sourcing. Again listeners; sorry you’ll miss the visuals, but take my word, this time you’re not missing much. We have to break for many, many accurate words compiled by our sponsor; Renaissance Technologies, LLC; ‘Please come see is if you have one hundred million to invest.’”
An unseen, deep and mellow voice intoned; “You may not know this, but the Muslim claimed ‘homeland’ of Western Asia is now as rife with violent trouble as it has always been throughout recorded history, perhaps more so due to access to an advanced weaponry imported from intelligent countries, with a surreptitious aim at having the brain challenged, bearded for want of understanding how a razor works, simians annihilate each other, saving the more advanced the trouble of icky contact; profitable too. But that is admittedly a monumentally high bar in need of some sort of adjustment for time, brain size, and available weaponry. It is only denied by those westerners still afflicted with IQ “issues” and the Illuminilibtardi lock-steps
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that there is no coincidence that retrograde simians produce an environment conducive to the continued habitation and encouragement of regurgitated retrograde simians. Holding all variables other than Islamic majority, dictated practices and beliefs constant, this is what you have begun to see and can soon more fully expect in D.I.S.S.U.S,” now the land of hooligan goon ISIS backwardly interpreted Sharia law;”
D.I.S.S.U.S. 2030
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Muslim Western Asia is the pre-eminent s***hole region in Western Asia, if not the world. Bordering Lebanon, Jordan, and Israel, one is reminded of how unfair random placement can be for the others. The super s***hole region has fertile plains
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which are not boringly farmed due to the Muslim Western Asian preference for the excitement of continued battle. As a consequence there is a proliferation of unskilled drone activity and the attendant opposition bombed ruins coupled with food shortages.
According to the limitations imposed through the crowd sourced information posted on Wikipedia, Muslim Western Asia is home to diverse ethnic and religious groups; 80% Sunni (pronounced soon-ee, as opposed to the reviled sunny) Muslim, 19.9% Shiite (pronounced she-ite as opposed to you-know-what) Muslim, and .1%
the 14 various others too dumb or stubborn to leave; who have survived the approximately post-622 AD, perpetual Sunni Muslim purge. Those in fleetingly, ISIS thug controlled sections tend strongly toward strict adherence to fundamentalist Sunni doctrines, or have learned to say that they do, with the needed proficiency attendant to and perfected by a clandestinely-difficult-to-pin-down Parliamentary Brexit Remainer, more or less, depending.
By way of background; Sunni Islam is polled as being the largest denomination of Islam, followed by 75–90%, or 85-97% of the
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world's Muslims, depending on your source of information, further insofar as that estimate can be accurately gleaned, even under yet-to-be perfected polling methodology, and further in recognition that the outcome had been issued by a marginally cooperative society under the habitual burdens of duress, an educational system which stresses the plethora of ways to make and detonate explosives, fear for personal safety, and which are conducted by an entity somewhat known as an “affiliate” of
“friendly,” oft-used and “loved” Goggle, under a loosely worded government contract supposedly awarded to the lowest bidder; and is further well within the same “margin-of-error” limitations intoned in absence of apology by the professional pollsters who still seem to think that Hillary Clinton was elected President of the US (now re-named DISSUS) in 2008, 2012, 2016 and 2020
landslides. According to the statistically advanced and learned pollsters, it was the ignorant voters who were severely flawed, those flaws inclusive of, but not limited to, math deficiencies, a lack of common sense, out and out fibbing, and hostile, bordering on anti-social poll non-participation in all four races.
Sunni comes from the word sunnah, which is said to refer to the behavior of the Islamic prophet Muhammad, clearly and concisely
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explained as Sunnah, also sunna or sunnat, which is the body of literature which discusses and prescribes the traditional customs and practices of the Islamic community, both social and legal, often but not necessarily based on the verbally transmitted record of teachings, deeds and sayings, as well as the later interpreted, silent permissions of the ersatz prophet, tiny thigh aficionado, seven heavens explorer, slayer of 700, and reporter, Moe. To this semi-leap of faith is also added the various reports allegedly from and about Moe's alleged companions/accomplices, with an alleged predilection for
‘justice,’ most often administered through the righteous, crowd-sourced chucking of rocks. The Koran and the sunnah make up the two primary causes and supplies of Islamic theology and law; the former the supposed justification for the ISIS fundamentalism some detractors describe as dumb, organized crime thuggery, that characterization all too consistent with what is persuasively transmitted on a daily basis to the illiterate in the state of helplessness. In addition to the age old, boring loose construction-strict construction arguments, other differences between the Sunni and the rebellious Shia, or neither-here-nor-there versa-visa, somewhat beyond insofar as stating the minority position as being equated to that hoary Sunni Muslim armed-hissy-fit with Shiite Muslims, which emanate from a disagreement over the succession to Moe and subsequently
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acquired broader political significance with supplementary lesser information, nonetheless prejudiced, as well as the usual resultant theological and juridical dimensions, the subject of many more protracted theses and merchant of employment, most initiated by otherwise camel-poo-kicking Imams in search of a
“powerful” profession, devoid of the stiff competition rendered by the three savagely proliferating forms of Muslim Western Asia dung beetles.
In brief, and according to Sunni traditions, Muhammad did not clearly designate a successor and the Muslim community acted according to his sunnah (information surmised ostensibly through advanced osmosis by the recent, now former camel-poo-kickers after his death) in electing one of his fathers-in-law, Abu Bakr as the first caliph. Though consistent in the ordinary, nepotistic method of power transferal, it contrasts with the Shiite view, which holds that Muhammad announced his son-in-law and cousin Ali ibn Abi Talib as his successor, most notably while in the presence of Ali’s assertive mom. Political tensions between Sunnis and Shiites continued with varying intensity throughout Islamic history and have been exacerbated in recent times by ethnic conflicts and the rise of Wahhabism; essentially
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another branch of the infinitely interesting and never ceasing monotheism-polytheism argument.
The Koran, together with its attendant Hadith (especially those collected in Kutub al-Sittah) and binding juristic consensus, form the basis of all traditional jurisprudence within Sunni Islam. Sharia rulings are derived from these basic sources, in conjunction with the argued analogical reasoning, Sunni said to be provided through Imam holy regurgitations of things a lay person may not see as analogous, consideration of public welfare and juristic discretion, using the principles of jurisprudence developed by the traditional legal schools which originated to decide disputed camel poo ownership; un-named at their wishes, in fear of widespread mockery.
Muslim Western Asia contains some of the oldest continuously at war, thereby impoverished, inhabited, self-induced-tenements in the world; a tribute to the tradition-dominated, shallow, insistent ignorance, and laziness of one form of hominid life alleging some relationship with mankind. In the Islamic era, Damascus is a provincial capital of the Mamaluk Sultanate in Egypt, whatever that means. 1971 marked the introduction of yaks
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and yak poo, and a short lived Muslim Western Asian hiatus from economically and fun based hostilities.
Muslim Western Asia’s chief exports are a religion centered on white annihilation, unshaven, violent jihadists, yaks and related yak poo; Sharia Law, Muslim underage-white-seeking posses intending a “grooming” obviously misplaced, camels and related camel poo, exotic dancers of all known genders, and fatwahs. Their chief imports are small arms, chainsaws, sound amplification systems, and how-to assemble bomb instructions.
Muslim Western Asia is unsurprisingly ranked last on the Global Peace Index, making it the most violent region in the world.
This celebrated distinction has been held since the GPI began official tabulation in 1931; that no doubt a factor strongly taken into consideration by rumored native, former US President Barack Obomber when he gave nukes to neighboring Iran, ostensibly a respectable 133 of 163 on the GPI index, perhaps hoping they’d put Syria out of its misery. It is said that life, as it were, continues normally for most of its citizens as of December 2029.
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According to Islamic doctrine, Muhammad was the founder of Islam, the last prophet, sent by Allah to present and confirm the monotheistic teachings of his predecessors. He united Muslim Western Asia into a single Muslim entity, through the Koran, his teachings, and by slaying heretics. In fairness, it should be noted, that the estimated killings ordered or performed by Muhammed range from a few necessaries, as stated by Muslim
“authorities” of today, to 800, as stated by the heathen, heretical, disreputable sources of information; not inclusive of the deaths in battles he led or ordered.
Born approximately 570 AD (Year of the Elephant) in the Arabian city of Mecca, Muhammad was orphaned at the age of six and raised by his paternal grandfather and uncle; not the same person, but one has to specify in Muslim Western Asia. From 583
until 609 he was a merchant; from 609-632 a religious leader/battle strategist-captain. In later years he would understandably seclude himself in a mountain cave named Hira for several nights of prayer. When he was 40, Muhammad reported being visited by Gabriel in the cave, and received his first revelation from Allah, apparently from this “Gabriel” visitor.
Three years later, Muhammad started preaching; a profession rather endemic to those blessed by “Gabriel’s” social calls;
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much more prevalent prior to the inhibiting presence of psychiatric institutions.
Approximately twenty years later, when Muhammed was able to assemble 10,000 camel-poo-kicking followers, fighting ensued.
Religion, power-based considerations, and Muslim Western Asian tradition combined to provide the impetus. The battles continued throughout Muhammed’s existence; the end of which is attributed to the combined forces of physical and mental fatigue, as well as untreated syphilis. He had thirteen wives which are known of; the first married in 595, the second immediately upon the first’s death in 619, and eleven married during his religious height in 623-630. Seven children were borne him by his first two wives and none by the last eleven. Recalling the initial Sunni-Shiite split previously mentioned one must presume that Muhammed must have deemed none of his offspring to be capable of succeeding pop. The ten wives who were not yet dead when Party Animal Moe kicked it in 632 simultaneously disappeared; their future earthly whereabouts unknown prior to reported fleeting glimpses of Heavenly ascension.
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One might think that an inordinate amount of time has been spent discussing Muhammed during a discussion of Muslim Western Asia, but the writer-of-this-infomercial-in-search-of-a-kindred-spirit-with-deep-pockets feels it appropriate as Mohammed, Muhammed, Mohamed, Muhammad, Muhammat, Mohammad, or whatever has been recently granted an inordinate amount of influence in D.I.S.S.U.S. by the Illunilibtardi; in addition to what one might well-argue to be total control of Muslim Western Asia, for more than 1,000 years. That does seem a bit much for a murderer in need of so many aliases. Didn’t anyone ever check his birth certificate and driver’s license?
Islam, Muslim, Moslem, Musulman, Mosquegoers, or whatever; are the religion or religions he founded, helped by his trip into the heavens precociously prior to the invention of zeppelins, hot air balloons, airplanes, helicopters, or rockets, has a main tenet. It is forbidden to kill properly practicing Muslims, et al; flagrant suspicious use of pseudonyms previously mentioned.
Others are discretionary. In the case of rich white shoppers in non-observing areas, like D.I.S.S.U.S., the U.K., and Israel, a self-sacrificing suicide bomber is rewarded with fifty virgins in Paradise; the faithful ostensibly believing that they do not eternally remain as such. Complications are known to arise when
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the bombed include one or more Muslim adherents mingling with the heathens. This high order Islamic dispute is investigated and judged by a secret panel of fatwah-happy Ayatollahs; the infinite fate of the bomber and his/her virgins in the balance.
The effectiveness of this pervasive religion may in one way be assessed by the joyous, high living standards in the area, admittedly bolstered by the oil revenue. Its desirability as a home is indicated by immigration, and tourist popularity.
The writer thinks it fair to note that in addition to their demand to establish Muslim law wherever they may be, that is only one of the four Muslim traits westerners find most objectionable and disgusting. Thighing infants, child grooming, and Pashtun Bacha Bazi round out the short version of the list.
Of the last three only the infant thighing was specifically endorsed by Mohammed, as 6 year old Aisha experienced with the then 50 year old holy man. The other two may be viewed as Hadith based heresay, approved in writing by the Ayatolla Ruholla Khomeini.
Prior to Muhammed’s corrective actions, things in pre-Muslim Western Asia began a sharp decline shortly after jihadists stole
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a polytheistic god’s nose and made women wear clothing, circa 1600 BC. One advancement was noted as early as the Ebla royal palace, circa 2400 BC; noting that the lack of windows is an ingenious adaptation to the proliferation of crazed rock chuckers, and is perhaps the earliest known manifestation of intelligent life sectors in the region, if one rules out the behavior of animals, unfair in comparison, due to the animals’
inherent advantage of not being burdened by the worship of the alleged teachings of a prime candidate for institutionalization, had Muslim Western Asia any formalized institutions, other than an apparent tradition-based favoring of the entrenched bedlam, sprinkled with crumbs of dried camel and yak poo.
Wars began their perpetual existence with various groups with weak leaders and the usual stuff like that taking over, then getting wiped out, yadda yadda as one might expect, ad infinitum in pre as well as post Muslim Western Asia. Seekers of repetitive detail can find them in various places on Wikipedia; no offense intended toward Wiki’s thoroughness.
By 1961, thanks to expansive General Motors Credit Corporation, autos replaced yaks and camels as the vehicle of choice. This
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also proved to provide an economic boom by Muslim Western Asian standards, as they were now able to eat their former means of transportation. But, despite the sudden economic shot in the arm, upheaval dominated daily life and the illusions and dreams of a full-bellied politics amenable to the bearded, short-tempered, violent, camel poo dependent aficionados of mayhem were promptly returned to the Southeast Asia version of normal.
And it was even more normal when one considered the anger of the carpet knife armed, male segment of the population.
Politics and government are ineffective and/or non-existent in Southeast Asia. If there is any semblance of a central, semi-sentient power, the “semi” graciously stated in place of the more accurate “non,” it lies in a confluence of approximately 40,000 Ayatollahs. However, there is little or no agreement between them, and at any given time there are 400,000 different fatwahs in effect. Based on their learned interpretations of the Koran, and if necessary the Old Testament, each call for the extermination or banishment of certain groups or people, often the other Ayatollahs. This belligerent and ecumenical hate model had been first adopted for the 21st century United Kingdom and later D.I.S.S.U.S. A more or less up-to-date listing may be found on WikiFatwahPediaphile.com.
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Human rights, a standard consideration in most of the world’s regions, is only mentioned by someone who must have a morbid sense of humor to even consider this in regard to Muslim Western Asia. There is a dearth of localized humanitarian issues due to a dearth of local humanitarians; as well as an absence of foreign relations which couldn’t be described as ballistic.
Severed infidel heads became the primary “coin of the realm” in 1991. After suffering relentlessly changing regimes and relentlessly worthless new currencies, the people insisted upon something which was relatively small and would keep its value; settling on heads. Think of it like Bitcoin with a growing supply. Severed penises are used to make change. Abductees represent the entirety of human visitors from elsewhere. Some camels and yaks have crossed the border.
Education is more or less compulsory from ages 6 to 12. Schools are run by clerical gangsters who supply the books which teach that the white man is the devil, under grants from the Saudi Royal Family. This is followed by a three year training period in which the child can major in a myriad of subjects chosen by
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his Ayatollah, ranging from Export Jihadism, to Advanced Extortion, to Explosives.
Developed western societies must give patience the utmost priority if compelled to engage Muslim Western Asia. Where else on this planet would camel-yak-shit-kickers protect themselves from the 140 degree desert heat by donning every blanket the camel had not recently pooped?”
With this the voice temporarily terminated its purported Muslim Western Asia information analysis, saying; “Thank you for listening to part one in our presentation of ‘Muslims are Icky.’
Renaissance Technologies, LLC, once again invites the well-heeled of you to please come see the friendly associates we have on staff if you have one hundred million or more to invest. We have been return rated #1 by Hedge Fund Research, Inc. for ten years running, averaging a 35% return per annum. In a silly required legality, Renaissance Technologies, LLC management makes no such claim; past, present, or as an indicator of reasonable future expectations. Wink. Wink.”
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Artless said; “Oh, wow. That must have lasted five frigging minutes. How much you got in your pocket, Hooey?”
Someone backstage, and with an apparent predilection toward avoiding the main topic yelled; “Three and a fucking half! Learn to tell time, fat ass.”
Donald Jr. said; “See what I mean, man. The show gets overtaken by the faceless unelected, protected by the union, in the unseen darkness of the Deep State and their partners-in-crime, the old, senile, federal judges.”
Hooey said; “Sort of yeah. But, if there was anything more wouldn’t a semi-competent world leader be able to overcome that?”
Don Jr. said; “Shoulda, woulda, coulda. Ooooh, the unbearable guilt. But, in order to make that useless feeling last more than
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five seconds, just show me one who tried and wasn’t assassinated tooting sweet.”
Artless said; “I asked you, how much you got in your pocket Hooey. Opportunity only knocks once, dammit.”
Hooey said; “ ............................ Just ignore him, Don.
Everyone else does. ........ On a simple logic basis, it would be interesting to know why all these ‘wonderful migrants’ have chosen to leave the homes they have made so ‘wonderful’ in order to be in a strange land where, excepting London, they are completely surrounded by white devils. It may seem cruel to say, but the only possible answers are that the Muslims want to spread their Sharia law as far as possible at all costs, or that the ‘Islamic men’ have a thing about under-aged white girls and boys. In proper 2030 parlance, pedophile rape equals, and is more indivisibly termed ‘child grooming,’ in Muslim worshipping, Illuminilibtardi PCP parlance.”
Demonstrating the “rare” adult ability to be ADD distracted, Artless abandoned his fixation with what Hooey had in his pocket
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in favor of a more personal fixation concerning his lineage and hue. He cried as he said; “It’s not my fault that I was born white. No one asked me. No one offered me a palette of colors to choose from. But, here I am, trapped and reviled for something I can’t hide. I’ve become the suicide hotline’s most frequent caller. They’re starting to tell me that my feelings are correct and ask if I have easy access to a rooftop of at least five stories. Dammit, I just wanna be black. ............ errr, brown. So that people like me, give me presents, respect, and stuff.”
Hooey said; “Don’t mind him, Don. He gets this way whenever the backstage guys outdo him. The sympathy seeking will end if he thinks of anything bright to say, that a relative term.”
Perhaps borrowing from his Dad, Don Jr. may have, under the circumstances, gone startlingly attempted comic; and through his difficult to interpret guffaw said; “See, dad. You were right; but so was I. .......... I guess they just had to have been there, like one of the homeless losers who should be most concerned with meth intake, mental imbalance, and tent prices; which they never are, to have any hope of understanding the
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double twist at the end. ..................... Fuck it. It isn’t our problem anymore.”
Hooey said; “A non-serious moment if I might. It was decided that any attempt to keep Muslims out of the US was a violation of our long held freedom of religion doctrine.”
Don Jr. said: “Islam is even less of a religion than that which is practiced by the Ku Klux Klan. At least the KKK only hates one group; kind of tolerant in relative comparison. Muslims make it a virtue rewarded in Moe’s heaven to kill all, anything, and everything not in full compliance with Muslim regressive doctrines. I never could understand how the Illuminilibtardi could so consistently support a group which denies all female rights, denies any notion of legal due process in favor of mob beheadings reminiscent of 19th century Georgia, advocates ancient barbaric forms of cruel and unusual punishment, and blames those who have purchased their oil for all the problems which their own writings of history say they have had since before there was a West. The only guess I can make is that the media proficient Illumilibtardi have been purchased by Zawahiri,
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the Saudi Royal Family, or Bin-Laden interests. ......... As I previously said; fuck it. No longer my problem.”
Hooey said; “Hasn’t their punitive actions toward wealth affected you?”
Don Jr. said: “Just a smidgeon, Hooey; if that. In this advanced cyber age it takes less than 100 keystrokes to transfer money away from localities which seek to disdain and/or steal it to one which welcomes its presence. Surprised you didn’t know that.
Forgive me, but it seems that it’s kind of Remedial Eco 101. I can see the flashing red light; so before we have to close let me read into the record that which they have deleted or purposely misstated everywhere else. Some quotes from Dad.
‘The influence of Islam paralyses the social development of those who follow it. No stronger retrograde force exists in the world.’
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‘Improvident habits, slovenly systems of agriculture, sluggish methods of commerce and insecurity of property exist wherever the followers of Mohammed rule or ape living. Soon coming to a mainstream station near you.’
‘These slobs ought to try grooming themselves.’
‘Islam has already spread throughout Central Africa; and were it not that Christianity is sheltered in the strong arms of science, the science against which it had vainly struggled, the civilization of modern Europe might fall, as fell the civilization of ancient Rome.’
‘The fact that in Mohammedan law every woman must belong to some man as his absolute property, either as a child, a wife, or a concubine, must delay the final extinction of slavery until the
‘faith’ of Islam has ceased to be a great power among hominids.’
‘In America, we have as much need for Islam as we do more pedophiles and school shooters.’
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‘If you think that Islam is a real religion; the next time you need a doctor call Miranda Bailey.’
‘The Illuminilibtardi media controllers conveniently attribute the countless atrocities to ‘radical’ Islam. It is not
‘radical.’ It is fundamental. Try reading their standard books of hate and listen to their hateful speech, libtard.’
‘Either we have a country or we don’t.’
‘Muslims found their American dream with underage white girls after doing the same in the UK.’
‘You think we had a problem with the niggaz and wetbacks? Niggaz and wetbacks love me. Wait until these Q-Tip heads take over. In six months they’ll change the US into the backward, racially biased, shithole countries they came from.’
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‘When the constitution guaranteed religious freedom, only the Israelis knew that anyone considered this Islam abomination to be a religion.’
‘There are a few easy ways to break up an Islamic rally; 1) Yell out ‘Drone!