With the right mindset you can increase your confidence in a very short amount of time.
A problem that some people make is incorrectly labeling confidence.
Some people see other people demonstrating their unique qualities, then they realize they don't have those abilities, and then they translate that into not having confidence. Confidence is about just being comfortable with who you are, while accepting and enjoying the unique qualities of other people.
It's that simple.
You have to not only be comfortable with your uniqueness, but the uniqueness of others as well.
Very important. One of the quickest ways to read a person with little confidence is to observe:
How jealous they are of others
How they tend to put others down (or point out the flaws of others)
They tend to exaggerate a confident persona is so many ways.
Show me someone who has something negative to say about other people, and I'll show you someone who isn't comfortable with himself.
Show me someone who is jealous of other people, and I'll show you someone who isn't comfortable with himself.
Some people have amazing gifts. Some people are entertainers. Some people crave more attention than others.
If you're at a party and there is a guy who is being the 'life of the party' (in his mind, he may think he's the dominate male or maybe he just enjoys making other people laugh).
You can sit next to the girl who's giggling at him from a distance, and say (with a smile) 'That guy's hilarious!... by the way, what's your name?' And then eventually get her phone number, call her up to see what she's all about... (see if she meets your standards)...while being comfortable with who are...
Instead of: Angrily looking at her (from a distance) while she is laughing at him (from a distance) while thinking, I need to learn how to juggle 5 beer bottles while being pissy drunk in myboxers!!!Do you know someone like that?
(I'm not talking about someone who juggles beer bottles in their boxers. I'm talking about someone who gets angry-jealous over other guys and allows it to corrode their confidence.)
Sometimes they disguise it as witty humor, but you know what's really going. They're always getting angry at guys having success with women. Trying to find flaws.True Story:
When I was single, I had a half-buddy (this is the guy in your group of friends that you don't really connect with...and it could be because he's hatin' on you) who got mad because this smoking-hot girl liked me. Here's what happened...
We went to visit a mutual friend's girlfriend (with the mutual friend, of course) - who happen to have her female friends over - one of them being the smoking-hot girl.In the half-buddy's mind, things were perfect between us. Of course, he only saw the part where she gave me her number.
So when we all hung out, he was hatin' biiiiiiiig time. He was saying that she only liked me because of my car. LOL
Which at the time, was a Eagle Talon that I paid $3000 for... Btw, if you read Super Seduction Power or Super Compliments, it's the same girl I talked about where I first discovered the power of Super Compliments who ended up practically raping me. But at the time that he was hating, things were kind of dry...
In fact, it's the first time I learned that when saying the right things' to a girl triggers a fun response. And things can go from Boring to Steamy-Fun!!! Yeah, I know 'DUH'... but again, (to my knowledge) that was my first experience I had with saying 'something' that created massive sexual tension.
((So that experience was significant to me. It's kind of like when the rookie baseball player collects the ball from his first Home Run.))((I'm sure if half-buddy would have found out about that, he would have said: 'it was STILL the car'...NOT, the fact that I made her feel amazing about herself. That's like hitting your first home run and then your half-buddy non-jokingly talks about how strong the wind was blowing out...))
Of course, I never told him that part of the story.The point is, he was the classic guy who gets angry when other people are having fun. Instead of trying to learn from the success of others so that he can have his fun, too.
· Enjoy life.
· Enjoy other people's success. · Be comfortable with who you are.
Create a habit of 'feeling good' about other guys getting results, too. That helps to project a mindset of 'being comfortable' with yourself in a way that's almost magical to women (all by itself).
Don't ever make excuses!Warning: You will end up decreasing your confidence very fast!! You'll become an Only-Because Guy...
Don't say, he gets women only because he's attractive. Don't say, he gets women only because of his car.
Don't say, he gets women only because he has lots of money. Don't say, he gets women only because ___________________. Don't say, he gets women only because ___________________. Don't say, he gets women only because ___________________.
After all, no one can stop you from feeling good about yourself.
Also: Make it a point to become massively comfortable others.
No one can stop you from 'making a list of your Top Successes With Women (which I sometimes refer to as an I'm The Man File) and looking at it 10+ times per day for 3 straight days...
Do you think doing that would positively affect how you feel about yourself?It's an incredible way to rapidly increase your confidence with an easy exercise.
It could be done in a matter of minutes !!!
And yet your confidence has been Super-Charged! The list could contain ANYTHING (big or small) that made you feel like the man. You could add a 'statement' behind it, too.
For example, it could include a time when a girl in the 2nd grade said: I like you. You're the best boy in the class. If it made you feel like The Man, then it belongs on the list!
Take a look at an example of Top Successes With Women File
· A time when a girl in 2nd grade said: I like you. You're the best boy in the class.... that means: "I AM THE MAN"
· The time the girl at the party was kissing me on the neck and grabbing me on the belt saying in a pleading voice 'No one has ever made me this horny before. I want you now. Please Fuck me!!' (even if this happened 15 years ago, put it on your list and say ... that means: "I AM THE MAN")
· The time when blah blah blah· The time when blah blah blah and he was like 'Dude. What's you're problem? That was little my sister!.. (And you said: She still is!) ... that means: "I AM THE MAN")
This is your personal list!It doesn't have to be polite.
You don't have to share it with anyone. If it's a little embarrassing, then as long as when you read it, you start to get that 'Wow.. I am the man feeling' then you've done a good job.
Also...Don't be hater to yourself as well!
Don't be a half-buddy to yourself...
Don't be an Only-Because Guy to yourself...
The time the girl at the party was kissing you on the neck and grabbing you on the belt saying in a pleading voice 'No one has ever made me this horny before. I want you now. Please Fuck me!!' ....wait, I can't put that on the list, she said that only because she was drunk and she would have said that to anyone....
Increasing your confidence is a piece of cake.
It's not like Kung Fu or things like that - where in order to become a master you need years of training your physical motor movements.
A rapid change in confidence is different. It's based on perspective/perception so you can become a master in minutes! (at the rate in which you upgrade your perspective).
How many times have you said 'Hmmmmmm. That makes sense.'
Well, if that's happened to you, then in that moment (instantly) you changed the way you saw things forever!
That's because in a matter of seconds, you experienced a major shift in how you think.
Part 1: Feeling good about yourself. Feeling comfortable with who you. Making the decision to focus on your positive traits. Keep telling yourself 'positive things' like you're the man (all the stuff we just talked about)
Part 2: Keep a fresh positive outlook. Stay away from negative people. Avoid or limit watching the news or activities that are depressing. From the age of 15 - 20, I use to watch the local news everyday. I stopped at the age of 20. I noticed a huge difference in my mood within days of stopping. I haven't watched it since. It's been one of the best decisions I have ever made.
Part 3: Keep your brain healthy. Deficiencies in key vitamins & minerals will affect your mood because your brain isn't getting the nutritional support for essential brain functioning. Make sure you are consistently eating healthy and exercising.
Here are a list of key vitamins and minerals that are essential for mood and sharp brain processing.· Water - Mild dehydration leads to slower brain functioning and feeling lethargic .
· Selenium - a mineral that has been associated with having an upbeat mood (source: Brazil nuts, tuna, beef, seafood)
· Magnesium - great for people who live stressful/intense lives. Low levels lead to confusion and mild depression (source: brown rice, spinach, organic peanuts)
· Tyrosine (an amino acid) - boosts levels of dopamine and norepinephrine. These are brain chemicals that are responsible for motivation, energy, stress management and other key brain activities. (sources: fish, avocados, bananas, turkey, chicken, yogurt, almonds)
· Essential amino acids (Gamma-amino-butyrate, Tryptophan, Adenosine, Arginine, Nacetyl) play an important role in normal brain function (source: whole grain bread, oats, broccoli)
· Omega-3 fatty acid - the main component of brain synapses. Not getting enough leads to diminish intellectual performance (source: flaxseed, salmon, walnuts, sardines, pasta, Sunflower Seeds)