“Quicker.” I urged her but just as quickly as I got angry it dissipated. There was something about her that I just couldn’t stay mad at.
She pulled an angry face at me but in all honesty she was as happy getting on that flight as I was that she was getting on it with me. What would happen once we arrived in Poland would happen but for now she was mine.
She had told me about how they had got her over to the UK from Poland with modelling work, then when that slowly dried up they offered other work. Less artistic nude and more get your tits out for the boys. It wasn’t a huge leap from there to dancing on a video, then letting a man pose simulating sex with her and finally the last straw of any modelling integrity was moving into the movies.
Once you’d been fucked raw for a week making a movie for everyone to see, getting paid for private jobs was less of a stretch.
She had resisted drugs but enjoyed a few beers, nothing stronger but she often needed the few beers for the simplest tasks. I had learnt even for getting out of bed. She had handed her notice in when we got back and for the last week had stayed with Me, Royce and the Finn. I know they both tried it on with her and who was I to get jealous but I did.
She was mine. She was escaping with me. I was the hero and the hero always gets the girl. It is practically the only reason to do good. In the movies at least.
It hadn’t been much of a week though. I desperately tried to get my life in order and find out as much as I could about the project that I was jumping or getting thrown into midstream. The hardest thing for me though was splitting up my contacts and handing them over to other undeserving sales team members.
Those lazy fucking deadheads just got a sack load of free money off me.
I hated dividing my contacts up but as far as M&M were concerned and what they were telling me was that I wouldn’t need them anymore. I hoped that meant a senior position upon my return but equally I knew that failure would mean unemployment. Poland was a risk but anything worth doing always would be a risk.
I spent Monday and Thursday in the office doing that task and Tuesday and Wednesday being brought up to speed on the Poland project. Monday started well enough with congratulations from the sales team, am sure there were a lot of false smiles. Am sure a lot of the nice words were meant to help butter me up so I’d pass along my best clients to the nicest ass kissers.
I didn’t though.
Not by choice but Minkins ordered me to hand off my client list to the longest serving underachievers. Am not sure why, it’s not the move I’d have made but I did it anyway. John who had hair growing out of every orifice except his mouth, out of which he channelled only halitosis. John received a long list of clients who had purchased from me at least twice in the last three months.
Every call went the same. I’d dial up, ask for my contact, inform them of my promotion at which point I’d introduce our young go getter named John. Once he had killed any good will that I’d built up we’d repeat and rinse.
That took all day Monday and while he was chatting I’d be looking over my files. I had to hand off none repeat business and leads to Marty. I can’t ever remember meeting Marty but I made the list and annotated files with relevant info such as: Spurs fan, likes the cold, wife is a Hindu. Anything I thought could be useful.
I used everything and talked about everything and that was why in my eyes I was so successful. I had worked in a working class, old school, pub during university and once you can balance pontificating with lecturers and cursing out drunks you can communicate. That was one of, if not my finest skill. People want to be a people person and the most idiotic people say they are people persons, no they aren’t, other people hate them. Me though, I am a people person because I walk a fine line between good and bad. I am unspecial in the most special way.
I am unassuming.
They never see it coming, until it’s too late.
You can’t teach that. Also I am not a people person, I hate most people. I think they are stupid. I hate religion, that is the stupidest shit ever. I hate other people’s babies. I hate talking to people about their fucking hobbies, if I liked it I’d do it too numb nuts. But they liked me listening and a good listener, who knows when to nod, is seen as likeable and thus a people person. So all you cheerful, bubbly fucks stop your yapping and open your ears, fill that vacuum between them and repeat enough of what the speaker is saying so they think that you agree with them. They like people who agree with them.
That would be the wisdom I would have passed down to my team. You can’t really teach that though and it is a delicate balancing act to keep up the facade of caring when you don’t. The last thing you can appear to be is arrogant, humble and dumb beats knowledgeable and arrogant, if you can pull off knowledgeable and humble that is divine.
The best contacts or big fish I was ordered to split between the big six. I hated those pricks but on Thursday I was going to be given an hour with each of them and run through all aspects of the sales and contracts of the clients. That day was horrible but that night I was on a plane to Poland, staring at the girl, the woman I now knew to be called Elzbieta. I called her Elly.
We nearly didn’t make the flight though as I hadn’t factored in a terrible accident that paralysed Leeds city centre. I had to abandon a taxi to take the train to the nearest train station to our flat. Once I was there I had hoped that Elly would be good to go and we’d be on our way. Unfortunately she was still getting dressed after spending all day in bed it seemed. Well she might have considered staying in bed all day work once upon a time but I hoped that in Poland she would be more lively, more of the time.
We took a taxi to the airport where I was surprised to see my Mum and Dad. I had returned to Bradford during the week to tell them about everything, see a couple of mates and offer open invitations to Warsaw. No one seemed that interested unless I’d be staying for the Euro in two summer’s time but I told everyone that it was highly doubtful. My brothers had made time for a quite beer but I didn’t get to see my nephews, who were at their mothers. I said I’d send them some Polish candy, I later changed my mind once I’d tasted it and ordered my brother to give then some Cadbury’s and pretend it was from me.
You miss the chocolate you grew up with the most. It isn’t so much the taste but the taste reminding you of simpler times. That is my guess any way.
“Erm, hi guys. This is Elly.” I said by way of an introduction. “These are my parents.” I said turning to her.
“Oh, I thought we’d missed you love.” My Mum said giving me a hug while sizing up Elly over my shoulder.
“Do you work with him?” My Dad asked.
“A-ha.” She said.
“We are really late. Am sorry but I think we have to get to the check in desk.” I said shaking my Dad’s hand, then pulling him in for a hug.
“You’re over there.” He said spinning me around. “Desk twenty three.”
He was right.
We all trundled over together, my Dad ever the gentleman helped Elly with her bags. I should have been doing that I guess but for the time being she wasn’t a girlfriend and I didn’t want to give her any power over me.
I don’t really remember what we said as we waited. I remember sweating nervously. How would it look if I couldn’t even make it over there on time?
Someone from the office was going to be waiting for us on the other side and the first impression my new team, my first team would get of me was that I couldn’t even catch a flight.
We waved off my parents as we rushed through checking in and the security guards who made us take off our shoes and made Elly throw away her make-up and drink. I told her I’d buy her new ones and that expedited the process. I took a look back to see my Dad consoling my crying Mother. I felt guilty. I never felt guilty, even when I knew I should do, it just wasn’t there. Sometimes I worried about being a sociopath but here it was, guilt.
I didn’t know why. I shouldn’t feel guilty now. I should feel proud. I imagined they were proud of me, tears of pride. Arrogance can work in your favour if you know when to let it roam free and when to muzzle it.
Home free or so I thought.
Elly was checking out the make-up in the duty-free shop.
“Come on.” I shouted. “I’ll buy you more in Warsaw.”
The scowl was back. Sullen princess stood statue still and looked away.
They called our flight.
She stood still.
“Ok.” I gave in. “Quickly.” I produced my debit card and reminded myself that it’d all be worth it.
She was happy again and we were moving again so I was, well not happy but frantically moving towards my Polish challenge. I should have known that Elly was the true Polish challenge but hindsight is a wonderful thing.
The queue wasn’t that long but there was a lot of aggressive pushing and I couldn’t believe how quickly one old woman pushed her way to the front. She skilfully used her walking stick to jab and cajole her way through and once she reached the front her speed was gone. No nimble jabs. No powerful thrusts. Just patient shuffles that made everyone groan.
Finally we boarded and we sat down on a row with three seats, her next to the window, me in the middle and the aisle seat free.
“I think I should sit next to the aisle so then we have the middle free for our stuff.” I suggested.
“You must sit next to me.” She said gripping my hand tightly.
“Ok.” I said happily.
“I never flown before.”
“What?” Could it be true?
“I came by bus and it was my first journey on board.”
“Abroad?” I asked.
She nodded but if she knew that was right, why did she say on board?
It didn’t matter.
“By bus? You came by bus? How long did that take?” I was astonished.
“One day.” She said smiling. She looked out of the window and then back at me. “I am scared.”
“Don’t be. I have flown lots and this is very simple, very quick.” I looked at our estimated landing time. “Less than two hours.”
“Will we see much?”
“At night. Not really. Lots of lights. It’ll be pretty. Like you.”
Always so smooth.
“You are so kind.”
With that she kissed my cheek and the gripped onto my hand. The cabin crew began their safety notifications and as I attempted to flick through the in-flight magazine she watched diligently. She even tried to locate her life jacket under her seat. At least that’s what I think she was doing. I had never listened. I might have watched if the stewardess was hot but even if she was today I wasn’t about to be caught checking out another woman. I had even bought The Economist to read instead of FHM or Maxim for that very reason.
We taxied to the runway then were up and away. A new adventure awaited me, us. Poland.