The Poetaster by Ben Jonson - HTML preview

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ACT V

SCENE I.-An Apartment in the Palace.

 

Enter CAESAR, MECAENAS, GALLUS, TIBULLUS, HORACE, and Equites Romani.

Caes.
We, that have conquer'd still, to save the conquer'd, And loved to make inflictions fear'd, not felt; Grieved to reprove, and joyful to reward;
More proud of reconcilement than revenge; Resume into the late state of our love,
Worthy Cornelius Gallus, and Tibullus:
You both are gentlemen: and, you, Cornelius, A soldier of renown, and the first provost
That ever let our Roman eagles fly
On swarthy AEgypt, quarried with her spoils. Yet (not to bear cold forms, nor men's out-terms, Without the inward fires, and lives of men) You both have virtues shining through your shapes; To shew, your titles are not writ on posts,
Or hollow statues which the best men are, Without Promethean stuffings reach'd from heaven! Sweet poesy's sacred garlands crown your gentry: Which is, of all the faculties on earth,
The most abstract and perfect; if she be
True-born, and nursed with all the sciences. She can so mould Rome, and her monuments, Within the liquid marble of her lines,
That they shall stand fresh and miraculous, Even when they mix with innovating dust; In her sweet streams shall our brave Roman spirits Chase, and swim after death, with their choice deeds Shining on their white shoulders; and therein Shall Tyber, and our famous rivers fall
With such attraction, that the ambitious line Of the round world shall to her centre shrink, To hear their music: and, for these high parts, Caesar shall reverence the Pierian arts.

Mec.
Your majesty's high grace to poesy, Shall stand 'gainst all the dull detractions Of leaden souls; who, for the vain assumings Of some, quite worthless of her sovereign wreaths, Contain her worthiest prophets in contempt. Gal. Happy is Rome of all earth's other states, To have so true and great a president,
For her inferior spirits to imitate,
As Caesar is; who addeth to the sun
Influence and lustre; in increasing thus
His inspirations, kindling fire in us.

Hor.
Phoebus himself shall kneel at Caesar's shrine, And deck it with bay garlands dew'd with wine, To quit the worship Caesar does to him: Where other princes, hoisted to their thrones By Fortune's passionate and disorder'd power, Sit in their height, like clouds before the sun, Hindering his comforts; and, by their excess Of cold in virtue, and cross heat in vice, Thunder and tempest on those learned heads, Whom Caesar with such honour doth advance.

Tib.
All human business fortune doth command Without all order; and with her blind hand, She, blind, bestows blind gifts, that still have nurst, They see not who, nor how, but still, the worst.

Caes.
Caesar, for his rule, and for so much stuff
As Fortune puts in his hand, shall dispose it, As if his hand had eyes and soul in it,
With worth and judgment. Hands, that part with gifts Or will restrain their use, without desert,
Or with a misery numb'd to virtue's right,
Work, as they had no soul to govern them, And quite reject her; severing their estates From human order. Whosoever can,
And will not cherish virtue, is no man.

[Enter some of the Equestrian Order. Eques. Virgil is now at hand, imperial Caesar.

Caes.
Rome's honour is at hand then. Fetch a chair, And set it on our right hand, where 'tis fit Rome's honour and our own should ever sit. Now he is come out of Campania,
I doubt not he hath finish'd all his AEneids. Which, like another soul, I long to enjoy. What think you three of Virgil, gentlemen, That are of his profession, though rank'd higher; Or, Horace, what say'st thou, that art the poorest, And likeliest to envy, or to detract

Hor.
Caesar speaks after common men in this, To make a difference of me for my poorness; As if the filth of poverty sunk as deep Into a knowing spirit, as the bane
Of riches doth into an ignorant soul. No, Caesar, they be pathless, moorish minds That being once made rotten with the dung Of damned riches, ever after sink
Beneath the steps of any villainy.
But knowledge is the nectar that keeps sweet A perfect soul, even in this grave of sin; And for my soul, it is as free as Caesar's, For what 1 know is due I'll give to all. He that detracts or envies virtuous merit, Is still the covetous and the ignorant spirit.

Caes.
Thanks, Horace, for thy free and wholesome sharpness, Which pleaseth Caesar more than servile fawns. A flatter'd prince soon turns the prince of fools. And for thy sake, we'll put no difference more Between the great and good for being poor.
Say then, loved Horace, thy true thought of Virgil.

Hor.
I judge him of a rectified spirit,
By many revolutions of discourse,
(In his bright reason's influence,) refined From all the tartarous moods of common men; Bearing the nature and similitude
Of a right heavenly body; most severe In fashion and collection of himself; And, then, as clear and confident as Jove.

Gal.
And yet so chaste and tender is his ear, In suffering any syllable to pass, That he thinks may become the honour'd name Of issue to his so examined self,
That all the lasting fruits of his full merit, In his own poems, he doth still distaste; And if his mind's piece, which he strove to paint, Could not with fleshly pencils have her right.

Tib.
But to approve his works of sovereign worth, This observation, methinks, more than serves, And is not vulgar. That which he hath writ Is with such judgment labour'd, and distill'd Through all the needful uses of our lives, That could a man remember but his lines, He should not touch at any serious point, But he might breathe his spirit out of him.

Caes.
You mean, he might repeat part of his works, As fit for any conference he can use?

Tib. True, royal Caesar.

Caes.
Worthily observed;
And a most worthy virtue in his works. What thinks material Horace of his learning?

Hor.
His learning savours not the school-like gloss, That most consists in echoing words and terms, And soonest wins a man an empty name; Nor any long or far-fetch'd circumstance Wrapp'd in the curious generalties of arts; But a direct and analytic sum
Of all the worth and first effects of arts. And for his poesy, 'tis so ramm'd with life, That it shall gather strength of life, with being, And live hereafter more admired than now.

Caes.
This one consent in all your dooms of him, And mutual loves of all your several merits, Argues a truth of merit in you all.---

[Enter VIRGIL.

See, here comes Virgil; we will rise and greet him. Welcome to Caesar, Virgil! Caesar and Virgil Shall differ but in sound; to Caesar, Virgil, Of his expressed greatness, shall be made A second sirname, and to Virgil, Caesar. Where are thy famous AEneids? do us grace To let us see, and surfeit on their sight.

Virg.
Worthless they are of Caesar's gracious eyes, If they were perfect; much more with their wants, Which are yet more than my time could supply. And, could great Caesar's expectation
Be satisfied with any other service,
I would not shew them.

Caes.
Virgil is too modest;
Or seeks, in vain, to make our longings more: Shew them, sweet Virgil.

Virg.
Then, in such due fear
As fits presenters of great works to Caesar, I humbly shew them.

Caes.
Let us now behold
A human soul made visible in life;
And more refulgent in a senseless paper Than in the sensual complement of kings. Read, read thyself, dear Virgil; let not me Profane one accent with an untuned tongue: Best matter, badly shewn, shews worse than bad. See then this chair, of purpose set for thee To read thy poem in; refuse it not.
Virtue, without presumption, place may take Above best kings, whom only she should make.

Virg.
It will be thought a thing ridiculous
To present eyes, and to all future times
A gross untruth, that any poet, void
Of birth, or wealth, or temporal dignity,
Should, with decorum, trauscend Caesar's chair. Poor virtue raised, high birth and wealth set under, Crosseth heaven's courses, and makes worldlings wonder.

Caes.
The course of heaven, and fate itself, in this, Will Ceasar cross; much more all worldly custom.

Hor.
Custom, in course of honour, ever errs; And they are best whom fortune least prefers.

Caes.
Horace hath but more strictly spoke our thoughts. The vast rude swing of general confluence Is, in particular ends, exempt from sense: And therefore reason (which in right should be The special rector of all harmony)
Shall shew we are a man distinct by it,
From those, whom custom rapteth in her press. Ascend then, Virgil; and where first by chance We here have turn'd thy book, do thou first read.

Virg.
Great Caesar hath his will; I will ascend. 'Twere simple injury to his free hand,
That sweeps the cobwebs from unused virtue, And makes her shine proportion'd to her worth, To be more nice to entertain his grace, Than he is choice, and liberal to afford it.

Caes.
Gentlemen of our chamber, guard the doors, And let none enter;

[Exeunt Equites.] peace. Begin, good Virgil.

Virg.
Meanwhile the skies 'gan thunder, and in tail Of that, fell pouring storms of sleet and hail: The Tyrian lords and Trojan youth, each where With Venus' Dardane nephew, now, in fear, Seek out for several shelter through the plain, Whilst floods come rolling from the hills amain. Dido a cave, the Trojan prince the same
Lighted upon. There earth and heaven's great dame, That hath the charge of marriage, first gave sign Unto his contract; fire and air did shine,
As guilty of the match; and from the hill
The nymphs with shriekings do the region fill. Here first began their bane; this day was ground Of all their ills; for now, nor rumour's sound, Nor nice respect of state, moves Dido ought; Her love no longer now by stealth is sought: She calls this wedlock, and with that fair name Covers her fault. Forthwith the bruit and fame, Through all the greatest Lybian towns is gone; Fame, a fleet evil, than which is swifter none, That moving grows, and flying gathers strength, Little at first, and fearful; but at length
She dares attempt the skies, and stalking proud With feet on ground, her head doth pierce a cloud! This child, our parent earth, stirr'd up with spite Of all the gods, brought forth; and, as some write, She was last sister of that giant race
That thought to scale Jove' s court; right swift of pace, And swifter far of wing; a monster vast,
And dreadful. Look, how many plumes are placed On her huge corps, so many waking eyes
Stick underneath; and, which may stranger rise In the report, as many tongues she bears,
As many mouths, as many listening ears.
Nightly, in midst of all the heaven, she flies, And through the earth's dark shadow shrieking cries, Nor do her eyes once bend to taste sweet sleep; By day on tops of houses she doth keep,
Or on high towers; and doth thence affright Cities and towns of most conspicuous site:
As covetous she is of tales and lies,
As prodigal of truth: this monster--

Lup. [within.] Come, follow me, assist me, second me! Where'! the emperor?

 

1 Eques. [within.] Sir, you must pardon us.

 

2 Eques. [within.] Caesar is private now; you may not enter.

 

Tuc. [within.] Not enter! Charge them upon their allegiance, cropshin.

 

1 Eques. [within.] We have a charge to the contrary, sir.

 

Lup. [within.] I pronounce you all traitors, horrible traitors: What! do you know my affairs? I have matter of danger and state to impart to Caesar.

 

Caes. What noise is there? who's that names Caesar? Lup. [within.] A friend to Caesar. One that, for Caesar's good, would speak with Caesar.

 

Caes. Who is it? look, Cornelius.

 

1 Eques. [within.] Asinius Lupus.

Caes.
O, bid the turbulent informer hence; We have no vacant ear now, to receive The unseason'd fruits of his officious tongue.

Mec. You must avoid him there.

Lup. [within.] I conjure thee, as thou art. Caesar, or respectest thine own safety, or the safety of the state, Caesar, hear me, speak with me, Caesar; 'tis no common business I come about, but such, as being neglected, may concern the life of Caesar.

Caes . The life of Caesar! Let him enter. Virgil, keep thy seat. Enter Lupus, Tucca, and Lictors.
Eques. [within.] Bear back, there: whither will you? keep back!

Tuc. By thy leave, goodman usher: mend thy peruke; so.

 

Lup. Lay hold on Horace there; and on Mecaenas, lictors. Romans, offer no rescue, upon your allegiance: read, royal Caesar. [Gives a paper.] I'll tickle you, Satyr.

 

Tuc. He will, Humours, he will; he will squeeze you, poet puck-fist.

 

Lup. I'll lop you off for an unprofitable branch, you satirical varlet.

Tuc . Ay, and Epaminondas your patron here, with his flagon chain; come, resign: [takes off Mecaenas' chain,] though 'twere your great grandfather's, the law has made it mine now, sir. Look to him, my party-coloured rascals; look to him.

Caes. What is this, Asinius Lupus? I understand it not.

 

Lup. Not understand it! A libel, Caesar; a dangerous, seditious libel; a libel in picture.

 

Caes. A libel!

 

Lup. Ay, I found it in this Horace his study, in Mecaenas his house, here; I challenge the penalty of the laws against them.

 

Tuc. Ay, and remember to beg their land betimes; before some of these hungry courthounds scent it out.

 

Caes. Shew it to Horace: ask him if he know it.

 

Lup. Know it! his hand is at it, Caesar.

 

Caes. Then 'tis no libel.

 

Hor. It is the imperfect body of an emblem, Caesar, I began for Mecaenas.

 

Lup. An emblem! right: that's Greek for a libel. Do but mark how confident he is.

Hor.
A just man cannot fear, thou foolish tribune; Not, though the malice of traducing tongues, The open vastness of a tyrant's ear,
The senseless rigour of the wrested laws, Or the red eyes of strain'd authority, Should, in a point, meet all to take his life: His innocence is armour 'gainst all these.

Lup . Innocence! O impudence! let me see, let me see! Is not here an eagle! and is not that eagle meant by Caesar, ha? Does not Caesar give the eagle? answer me; what sayest thou?

Tuc. Hast thou any evasion, stinkard?

 

Lup. Now he's turn'd dumb. I'll tickle you, Satyr.

 

Hor. Pish: ha, ha!

 

Lup. Dost thou pish me? Give me my long sword.

Hor.
With reverence to great Caesar, worthy Romans, Observe but this ridiculous commenter; The soul 'to my device was in this distich: Thus oft, the base and ravenous multitude Survive, to share the spoils of fortitude. Which in this body I have figured here, A vulture--

Lup. A vulture! Ay, now, 'tis a vulture. O abominable! monstrous! monstrous! has not your vulture a beak? has it not legs, and talons, and wings, and feathers?

 

Tuc. Touch him, old buskins.

 

Hor. And therefore must it be an eagle? Mec. Respect him not, good Horace: say your device.

 

Hor. A vulture and a wolf

 

Lup. A wolf! good: that's I; I am the wolf: my name's Lupus; I am meant by the wolf. On, on; a vulture and a wolf

 

Hor. Preying upon the carcass of an ass--

 

Lup. An ass! good still: that's I too; I am the ass. You mean me by the ass.

 

Mec. Prithee, leave braying then.

 

Hor. If you will needs take it, I cannot with modesty give it from you.

Mec.
But, by that beast, the old Egyptians
Were wont to figure, in their hieroglyphics, Patience, frugality, and fortitude;
For none of which we can suspect you, tribune.

Caes. Who was it, Lupus, that inform'd you first, This should be meant by us? Or was't your comment?

 

Lup. No, Caesar; a player gave me the first light of it indeed.

 

Tuc. Ay, an honest sycophant-like slave, and a politician besides

 

Caes. Where is that player?

 

Tuc. He is without here.

 

Caes. Call him in.

 

Tuc. Call in the player there: master AEsop, call him.

Equites. [within.] Player! where is the player? bear back: none but the player enter. [Enter AESOP, followed by CRISPINUS and DEMETRIUS.
Tuc. Yes, this gentleman and his Achates must.

Cris. Pray you, master usher:--we'll stand close, here.

Tuc . 'Tis a gentleman of quality, this; though he be somewhat out of clothes, I tell ye.-Come, AEsop, hast a bay-leaf in thy mouth? Well said; be not out, stinkard. Thou shalt have a monopoly of playing conflrm'd to thee, and thy covey, under the emperor's broad seal, for this service.
Caes. Is this he?

Lup. Ay, Caesar, this is he.

Caes.
Let him be whipped. Lictors, go take him hence. And, Lupus, for your fierce credulity,
One fit him with a pair of larger ears:
'Tis Caesar's doom, and must not be revoked. We hate to have our court and peace disturb'd With these quotidian clamours. See it done.

Lup. Caesar! [Exeunt some of the Lictors, with Lupus and AEsop

 

Caes. Gag him, [that] we may have his silence.

Virg.
Caesar hath done like Caesar. Fair and just Is his award, against these brainless creatures. 'Tis not the wholesome sharp morality, Or modest anger of a satiric spirit,
That hurts or wounds the body of the state; But the sinister application
Of the malicious, ignorant, and base
Interpreter; who will distort, and strain The general scope and purpose of an author To his particular and private spleen.

Caes.
We know it, our dear Virgil, and esteem it
A most dishonest practice in that man,
Will seem too witty in another's work.
What would Cornelius Gallus, and Tibullus?

[They whisper Caesar.
Tuc. [to Mecaenas.] Nay, but as thou art a man, dost hear! a man of worship and honourable: hold, here, take thy chain again. Resume, mad Mecoenas. What! dost thou think I meant to have kept it, old boy? no: I did it but to fright thee, I, to try how thou would'st take it. What! will I turn shark upon my friends, or my friends' friends? I scorn it with my three souls. Come, I love bully Horace as well as thou dost, I: 'tis an honest hieroglyphic. Give me thy wrist, Helicon. Dost thou think I'll second e'er a rhinoceros of them all, against thee, ha? or thy noble Hippocrene, here? I'll turn stager first, and be whipt too: dost thou see, bully?

Caes.
You have your will of Caesar: use it, Romans. Virgil shall be your praetor: and ourself Will here sit by, spectator of your sports; And think it no impeach of royalty.
Our ear is now too much profaned, grave Maro, With these distastes, to take thy sacred lines; Put up thy book, till both the time and we Be fitted with more hallow'd circumstance For the receiving of so divine a work.
Proceed with your design.

Mec. Gal. Tib. Thanks to great Caesar.

 

Gal. Tibullus, draw you the indictment then, whilst Horace arrests them on the statute of Calumny. Mecaenas and I will take our places here. Lictors, assist him.

 

Hor. I am the worst accuser under heaven.

 

Gal. Tut, you must do it; 'twill be noble mirth.

 

Hor. I take no knowledge that they do malign me.

 

Tib. Ay, but the world takes knowledge.

Hor .
Would the world knew
How heartily I wish a fool should hate me!

Tuc. Body of Jupiter! what! will they arraign my brisk Poetaster and his poor journeyman, ha? Would I were abroad skeldering for, a drachm, so I were out of this labyrinth again! I do feel myself turn stinkard already: but I must set the best face I have upon't now. [Aside.]--Well said, my divine, deft Horace, bring the whoreson detracting slaves to the bar, do; make them hold up their spread golls: I'll give in evidence for thee, if thou wilt. Take courage, Crlspinus; would thy man had a clean band!

Cris. What must we do, captain?

 

Tuc. Thou shalt see anon: do not make division with thy legs so.

 

Caes. What's he. Horace?

 

Hor. I only know him for a motion, Caesar.

 

Tuc. I am one of thy commanders, Caesar; a man of service and action: my name is Pantilius Tucca; I have served in thy wars against Mark Antony, I.

Caes. Do you know him, Cornelius? Gal. He's one that hath had the mustering, or convoy of a company now and then: I never noted him by any other employment.

Caes. We will observe him better.

 

Tib. Lictor, proclaim silence in the court.

 

Lict. In the name of Caesar, silence!

 

Tib. Let the parties, the accuser and the accused, present themselves.

 

Lict. The accuser and the accused, present yourselves in court.

 

Cris. Dem. Here.

 

Virg. Read the indictment.

Tib . Rufus Laberius Crispinus, and Demetrius Fannius, hold up your hands. You are, before this time, jointly and severally indicted, and here presently to be arraigned upon the statute of calumny, or Lex Remmia, the one by the name of Rufus Laberius Crispinus, alias Cri-spinus, poetaster and plagiary, the other by the name of Demetrius Fannius, play-dresser and plagiary. That you (not having the fear of Phoebus, or his shafts, before your eyes) contrary to the peace of our liege lord, Augustus Caesar, his crown and dignity, and against the form of a statute, in that case made and provided, have moat ignorantly, foolishly, and, more like yourselves, maliciously, gone about to deprave, and calumniate the person and writings of Quintus Horatius Flaccus, here present, poet, and priest to the Muses, and to that end have mutually conspired and plotted, at sundry times, as by several means, and in sundry places, for the better accomplishing your base and envious purpose, taxing him falsely, of self-love, arrogancy, impudence, railing, filching by translation, etc. Of all which calumnies, and every of them, in manner and form aforesaid, what answer you! Are you guilty, or not guilty?

Tuc. Not guilty, say.

 

Cris. Dem. Not guilty.

Tib . How will you be tried ?
[Aside to Crispinus.
Tuc. By the Roman Gods, and the noblest Romans.

Cris. Dem. By the Roman gods, and the noblest Romans.

 

Virg. Here sits Mecaenas, and Cornelius Gallus, are you contented to be tried by these?

[Aside. Tuc. Ay, so the noble captain may be joined with them in commission, say.

Cris. Dem. Ay, so the noble captain may be joined with them in commission.

 

Virg. What says the plaintiff?

 

Hor. I am content.

 

Virg. Captain, then take your place.

Tuc. alas, my

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