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The POWER of Laughter

How to be Happier, Healthier and Have More Fun

By John Williams © 2005

Proudly brought to you by

John Reese

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T h e P O W E R o f L a u g h t e r ’ b y J o h n W i l l i a m s

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Please Read This First

This book is intended to amuse and entertain mature people. Nothing has been included with the intention to shock, upset or offend and there is no overt sexual content. Some jokes may include situations and/or words from common experience that some people

might not approve of.

Remember, it is all fiction and only for amusement.

I believe that most readers will enjoy the stories and jokes in their context. It would be more unfair if adults’ reading was restricted except by their choice.

The entire contents of this book is copyright © 2005 John Williams. All rights are reserved.

No part of this book may be stored, sold or distributed by any current or future method without the prior specific permission of the author and publisher.

Only Members of Ebookwholesaler may sell this book, adhering to Ebookwholesalers’

terms and Conditions.

This book must not be offered or distributed through any barter arrangement, auction or auction site.

The contents are based on the author’s personal experience and research. The author, publisher and distributors are not responsible for any consequences that anyone may attribute to their reading this book.

Copyright © 2005 John Williams All rights reserved - 2 -

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T h e P O W E R o f L a u g h t e r ’ b y J o h n W i l l i a m s

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CONTENTS

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST .........................................................................................................................2

INTRODUCTION.............................................................................................................................................7

WE NEED HUMOR .........................................................................................................................................9

YOU CAN TELL A JOKE WELL................................................................................................................10

SPEAK AT NORMAL PACE..............................................................................................................................12

Laugh at Nerves.......................................................................................................................................12

JOKES AND STORIES ......................................................................................................................................13

SILLY SEASONING ......................................................................................................................................14

Leave Them Laughing .............................................................................................................................14

RISQUÉ JOKES ...............................................................................................................................................15

INSULTS AND PUT-DOWNS ............................................................................................................................16

AIM AT YOURSELF ........................................................................................................................................17

REMEMBER THE POINT! ..........................................................................................................................18

Never Explain the Joke............................................................................................................................18

KEEP IT SIMPLE ..........................................................................................................................................19

Just Use Email for Messages ..................................................................................................................19

Keep it Short ............................................................................................................................................19

Laughing at Your Own Joke....................................................................................................................19

THE WRONG JOKE OR THE WRONG AUDIENCE.............................................................................................21

Keep Niche Jokes for Niche People ........................................................................................................21

Telling In-Jokes. ......................................................................................................................................21

Talking Over Children’s Heads. .............................................................................................................21

BE A GOOD AUDIENCE ..............................................................................................................................23

STEAL FROM THE BEST............................................................................................................................24

BEING NATURAL … TAKES PRACTICE ...............................................................................................25

THE WAY YOU TELL THEM.....................................................................................................................26

Timing......................................................................................................................................................26

YOUR BIGGEST ASSET ..................................................................................................................................26

IMPRESSIONS AND ACCENTS .........................................................................................................................27

WHEN YOUR JOKE BOMBS......................................................................................................................29

Copyright © 2005 John Williams All rights reserved - 3 -

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T h e P O W E R o f L a u g h t e r ’ b y J o h n W i l l i a m s

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GOLDEN JOKES ...........................................................................................................................................30

POLISH AND PRACTICE..................................................................................................................................30

REMEMBERING PEOPLE ..........................................................................................................................31

STUNTS ...........................................................................................................................................................33

Cracker Surprise .....................................................................................................................................33

Sawing A Lady – Stage I..........................................................................................................................34

WRITING AND ‘TWISTING’ JOKES........................................................................................................36

THE JOKES … AT LAST!............................................................................................................................39

ANIMALS.......................................................................................................................................................39

Koalas......................................................................................................................................................39

BIRDS ............................................................................................................................................................40

AUTHORITY...................................................................................................................................................41

Law ..........................................................................................................................................................41

Royalty .....................................................................................................................................................42

Taxes........................................................................................................................................................42

BUSINESS ......................................................................................................................................................42

Bosses ......................................................................................................................................................44

Accountants .............................................................................................................................................45

Computers................................................................................................................................................45

Economists...............................................................................................................................................46

Holidays...................................................................................................................................................46

Lawyers....................................................................................................................................................46

Office Hours ............................................................................................................................................47

CELEBRATIONS .............................................................................................................................................47

CRIME ...........................................................................................................................................................48

EDUCATION...................................................................................................................................................51

ETHNIC..........................................................................................................................................................54

Australian ................................................................................................................................................54

British ......................................................................................................................................................54

FRIENDS ........................................................................................................................................................56

HARD LABOR ................................................................................................................................................58

Painters....................................................................................................................................................58

Plumbers..................................................................................................................................................58

HEALTH.........................................................................................................................................................59

Drinking...................................................................................................................................................59

Copyright © 2005 John Williams All rights reserved - 4 -

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T h e P O W E R o f L a u g h t e r ’ b y J o h n W i l l i a m s

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Exercise ...................................................................................................................................................60

Hospitals..................................................................................................................................................60

Smokers....................................................................................................................................................60

INSECTS.........................................................................................................................................................61

Ants ..........................................................................................................................................................61

Bees..........................................................................................................................................................61

Fleas ........................................................................................................................................................61

MONEY..........................................................................................................................................................61

OUR HAPPY HOME ........................................................................................................................................63

Children ...................................................................................................................................................64

Cooking....................................................................................................................................................66

Marriage..................................................................................................................................................67

POLITICS .......................................................................................................................................................68

RELIGION ......................................................................................................................................................69

RESTAURANTS ..............................................................................................................................................71

ROASTS .........................................................................................................................................................71

RULES TO LIVE BY........................................................................................................................................72

Critic’s Law .............................................................................................................................................72

Eighty - Twenty Rule ...............................................................................................................................72

The Law of Grants ...................................................................................................................................72

Law of History .........................................................................................................................................72

Law of Home Economics .........................................................................................................................72

John’s Rule ..............................................................................................................................................73

One Percent Rule.....................................................................................................................................73

Politician’s Rules ....................................................................................................................................73

Law of the Possible..................................................................................................................................73

Law of Projects........................................................................................................................................73

Law of Sausage........................................................................................................................................73

Law of Success.........................................................................................................................................73

Timely Laws.............................................................................................................................................73

SCIENCE ........................................................................................................................................................74

SHOW BUSINESS............................................................................................................................................74

Actors.......................................................................................................................................................74

Musicians.................................................................................................................................................75

SPEAKERS......................................................................................................................................................76

SPORT............................................................................................................................................................77

Football ...................................................................................................................................................77

Copyright © 2005 John Williams All rights reserved - 5 -

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T h e P O W E R o f L a u g h t e r ’ b y J o h n W i l l i a m s

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Golf ..........................................................................................................................................................77

Skiing .......................................................................................................................................................78

TOASTS .........................................................................................................................................................78

TRAVEL .........................................................................................................................................................78

TRANSPORT...................................................................................................................................................78

Cars .........................................................................................................................................................78

Railways. .................................................................................................................................................79

WAR OF THE SEXES.......................................................................................................................................79