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The Pillar of Dominance


Chapter 5
Oatmeal
"I apologize for the other day," said Dr. Morgan. "It was improper of
me to be so rude in asking you to leave."
Nella shrugged forgivingly, and took her former seat on the sofa.
They watched each other for a long moment in silence.
"You are not very talkative today," observed Dr. Morgan.
"What is there that can be spoken that is not already known?" sighed
Nella quietly, looking down at her hands.
"I see," he said, ponderously. “Perhaps you are just a little shy?” he
offered.
“Perhaps,” she replied. “Though to be shy is not an endearing quality,
for to be shy is to be afraid.
“Of what?” asked Dr. Morgan.
“Of disapproval.”
“There’s no harm in being shy or afraid,” said Dr. Morgan.
“True, though it can be a painful way to live,” replied Nella. “Shy
people often find themselves watching their dreams pass them by, all the
while doing nothing to claim them as their own. Being too shy to reach out
and touch one’s dream when it is only an arm’s length away is the definition
of heartbreak, if you ask me.” She finished.
“This shyness, does it ever keep you from what you want?”
“Sometimes it does,” confessed Nella. “I’m still working out how I
came to be this way. I want to understand this shyness within me rather than
exterminate it.” She turned around in her chair to glance at the bookshelf
behind, unable to forget it was there.
"Tell me, would you say you feel as though you fit into society?"
asked Dr. Morgan, watching the fidgety girl with uncertainty. Her peculiar
answers were difficult to diagnose.
"I have often felt as though I don't belong or fit in socially, but what
are the alternatives? I cannot live as others do, focusing so much of their
time on the avoidance of and the escape from what they perceive as reality.
And that leaves me with only one option, which is to dig deeper into myself,
and find peace with, and even love for, the very society my mind is so eager
to despise."
"Hum," said Dr. Morgan, putting on his reading glasses and looking
down at the notes he had written in her file during their previous session
together. Cringing, he violently scribbled over the written words. Catching
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