Fantastic passions' maddening brawl!
And shame and terror over all!
Deeds to be hid which were not hid,
Which, all confused, I could not know
Whether I suffer'd or I did,
For all seem'd guilt, remorse, or woe;
My own, or others, still the same
Life-stifling fear, soul-stifling shame.
Coleridge.
During the interval while she was thus left alone, Jeanie anxiously revolved in her
mind what course was best for her to pursue. She was impatient to continue her
journey, yet she feared she could not safely adventure to do so while the old hag
and her assistants were in the neighbourhood, without risking a repetition of their
violence. She thought she could collect from the conversation which she had
partly overheard, and also from the wild confessions of Madge Wildfire, that her
mother had a deep and revengeful motive for obstructing her journey if possible.
And from whom could she hope for assistance if not from Mr. Staunton? His
whole appearance and demeanour seemed to encourage her hopes. His
features were handsome, though marked with a deep cast of melancholy; his
tone and language were gentle and encouraging; and, as he had served in the
army for several years during his youth, his air retained that easy frankness
which is peculiar to the profession of arms. He was, besides, a minister of the
gospel; and, although a worshipper, according to Jeanie's notions, in the court of
the Gentiles, and so benighted as to wear a surplice; although he read the
Common Prayer, and wrote down every word of his sermon before delivering it;
and although he was, moreover, in strength of lungs, as well as pith and marrow
of doctrine, vastly inferior to Boanerges Stormheaven, Jeanie still thought he
must be a very different person from Curate Kilstoup, and other prelatical divines
of her father's earlier days, who used to get drunk in their canonical dress, and
hound out the dragoons against the wandering Cameronians. The house seemed
to be in some disturbance, but as she could not suppose she was altogether
forgotten, she thought it better to remain quiet in the apartment where she had
been left, till some one should take notice of her.
The first who entered was, to her no small delight, one of her own sex, a
motherly-looking aged person of a housekeeper. To her Jeanie explained her
situation in a few words, and begged her assistance.
The dignity of a housekeeper did not encourage too much familiarity with a
person who was at the Rectory on justice-business, and whose character might
seem in her eyes somewhat precarious; but she was civil, although distant.
