The Dumbbell's Dictionary
George Carlin, n. You just never know when you’re going to encounter a philosopher, to
wit: George Carlin really hit on something when he asked that if it’s true that we’re only
put here to serve others, then what are the others put here for. If none of us is to do
anything for ourselves, but always have others do it for us, does that not make us
simultaneously slaves and slave masters? See Ayn Rand for details.
Thomas Carlyle, n. Another of the West’s great men of the Reformation. He left us the
following gem in his „Characteristics.’ „The present is the living sum-total of the past.’
Carnival, n. Directly from the Latin: „carne,’ meat, and „vale,’ removal. Seems a bit of a
strange construction, due to the fact that we have for ever so long thought of a carnival as
a time of fun and feasting.
Carpenter, n. Craftsman who made himself a bacon, lattice, and tomato sandwich.
Carpetbagger, n. Hillary Clinton in her successful senate run from New York State in
2000. Pretty much followed in the footsteps of Robert Kennedy in 1964.
Rachel Carson, n. Due to the widespread acceptance of and government action initiated
by her 1960 „Silent Spring,’ responsible for the deaths of millions in underdeveloped
countries, due to the banning of DDT, which banning led to the resumption of malaria
caused by mosquitoes that were no longer killed.
Jimmy Carter, n. America’s second worst president. Simply doesn’t know when to quit
and shut up. If he’s not busy pounding nails into „Habitats for Humanity’ (Who else
would we expect to live in houses?), he’s jaunting around the world doing his own
diplomacy, the results in every case having been an absolute disaster.
Witness his certification of the honesty of the recent Chavez „election,’ in Venezuela, or
his absolute lack of success in halting North Korea’s continuing nuclear buildup.
Whatever happened to the Logan Act? He can, I suppose, be excused for the Playboy
interview in which he admitted that he had „sinned in his heart,’ but perhaps because he
had such prominent teeth. Maybe in his earlier years, a competent orthodontist had
prevented the development of a prominent overbite. (Did that overbite lead to his
Cartography, n. The act of photographing carts.
George Washington Carver, n. A true black American hero, who grew from slavery to
mastering the ability to teach black people that the only road to respect was to achieve: to
make white people take notice.
Cartwheel, n. Wheel of a cart.
Sidney Carton, n. Doomed hero of Dickens’s „Tale of Two Cities, which takes place in
London and Paris in the early years of the French Revolution. He stood in place of a
convicted Frenchman, and gave his life to the guillotine for him. Reminding us that Jesus
said „There is no greater love than this, that a man lay down his life for a friend.’
„Castles in the Air, n. Title of a hit song by Rod Maclean. I wish I could say it as well as
he did. City life? Cocktail generation? No thanks. Cities were at one time the cradles of
civilization, where commerce, culture, and industry began and flourished. No Longer,
and I have lived in the largest, including New York, and San Diego. In those cities, as