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The Dumbbell's Dictionary

prior to that date on two separate occasion in which bin Laden had been virtually been
handed to him in a silver platter, said no. Clinton’s response in both instances: „Thanks
but no thanks. This is a criminal, not a military matter.’
Those responses make Clinton culpable in the 9/ll attack, as well as in two earlier
devastating attacks on American embassies in Africa. Well, as I write in the Year of Our
Lord 2011, May 2, an American Special Forces unit begged to differ with Clinton’s
legalistic non-starter. Obama was killed by one shot to the head yesterday, said shot
administered by a Navy Seal, God bless him. That his remains were dumped at sea seems
appropriate. I just wonder how many of the seventy virgins who are going to attend him
can swim. Further, it’s about time he got his chance to meet Allah.
O’Tool’s Law, n. Murphy was an optimist.
Ottoman Empire, n. Early in the twentieth century, called „The Sick Man of Europe.’
Now has a foot rest named after it.
Outdoors, n. „The Outdoors and How It Got There,’ hilarious title of a chapter in an
eighties anti-ecofascist book by P.J. O’Rourke. I apologize for not recalling the book’s
title.
Outlaw, n. Doesn’t that pretty well describe the senior members of the Obama
conspiracy?
Ovid, n. Publius Ovidius Naso, 43 BC-18 AD, Roman poet who flourished at the time of
Augustus who, not being happy with Ovid’s „Metamorpheses’ as being too prurient,
banished him to the north shore of the (Euxine) Black Sea, never to return to his beloved
Rome. I can’t help wondering how Augustus would have reacted to the likes of Philip
Roth and his „Pourtnoy’s Complaint.’
Ovular, n. Product of semiliterate feminists who equate seminal with semenal.
Ownership, n. Contra Rousseau, Go out into the wilderness, fence a plot of land that has
no owner, put improvements on it, and own it. He considered this a crime against
humanity. My rejoinder is this: If everyone owns everything, than nobody owns anything.
The Oxford Companion to the English Language, n. Read it cover to cover, as I have, and
I guarantee you’ll come away better informed regarding both the roots and the treasure of
our language.
Oxymoron, n. A very stupid ox.
Oyster, n. Need not necessarily be austere.
Oz, n. Harriet’s husband.
P
Pacifist, n. Person who does not love life; moral covering for an absolute coward.
Thomas Paine, n. One of the heroes of the American Revolution. Left us many writings
worth remembering. This is among his finest. “I love the man that can smile in trouble,
that can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection. „Tis the business of
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