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The Dastardly Mr Winkle Meets His Match

Downloads: 2807         Pages: 499

Published: 2 years ago

Rating: Rated: 10 times Rate It

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Imagine a deeply miserable Fox Mulder with a potent distain for the even remotely strange, a hell of a lot of gin, super powers, and violent tendencies on a grail quest and you're pretty much there! "the story was riveting, humorous and exciting." "a bit too much gleeful violence and death for my taste" "It’s now 2.45 in the afternoon and other than breakfast, I’ve done nothing apart from lie in bed with my Kindle. ‘Roof’ must keep writing – he has genius qualities. Time for a shower and then back to Mr (Winkle) . . . . brilliant." This book is a black comedy. If you are easily offended about religious matters, then you're better off reading another work of fiction... I hear the bible's quite good. "The truth is out there, and if he finds it... He's going to insert explosives violently into its rectum!" Mr Winkle utterly despises anything even remotely peculiar, which is a bit of a shame as he's been a magnet for the bizarre ever since his hamster was killed in a freak seance accident when he was a child. The Holy Grail has been an object of great fascination for centuries and obvious, when Shoop gets a whiff of it, he instantly wants to destroy the damn thing! Unfortunately, there are a lot of very nasty people that want to get at it before he does and would be very happy if he were riddled with sharp things in the process. And so the race begins. Little do they know that the Holy Grail has been around since the dawn of life on this planet and has no plans to go anywhere any time soon, well not before she's had a nice cup of herbal tea anyway. WARNING: I am a writer, and a reasonable one too. What I haven't been an editor. Neither can I afford one, so please be patient with the odd typo or extra word here and there. Thank you and enjoy. Want to know more? More illustrations by the author and continuous updates will be found here:

Rufus Offor

Also… it's a comedy! Lighten up!

Rufus Offor

Well you can't please everyone now can you :)

Rufus William Offor

Thank you... I'm going to be doing a series of kids novels very soon about a pixie. he's going to be the magical realms version of Indiana Jones... stay tuned.

Rufus William Offor

I will absolutely not take that advice and will happily ridicule anything I find ridiculous, such as deifying political activists from thousands of years ago.. I'm not in it for the likes, I write because I love it. thank you for the other comments, you know, the good ones... as for the typo thing, I've edited 12 times because I can't afford an editor and am still finding mistakes... wanna do it for free?


I'm only about 30 percent through the book, but I find it wonderfully entertaining. The humor, style. I enjoy it so much in fact, I'll be looking to read something else by him. Hopefully he can bring his writing to another subject with the same light-hearted entertainment !

Rufus Offor

I see the lunacy in religion and I will write that down, I am not after fame and fortune, I am just about expressing myself.

k krieger

a bit too much gleeful violence and death for my taste

Yashmita Singh

Too much preaching about Jesus - should be labelled regligous book instead of fiction


I almost didn't't get past the first chapter.enough with the vampires. The story of creation really turned me off even though I strongly suspect much of what religion teaches us is incorrect. The rest of the story was riveting, humorous and exciting. Please take my advice. Don't mock Jesus if you want to succeed. Find a way to just take that out of the story and get an editor to fix the spelling and word usage errors. An accomplished story teller such as yourself should be free of those errors. Keep Jesus out of it and your likes will soar. I'm sure of that.


Rufus Offor

Artist, furniture maker, business owner, writing, thinker, with a history of slightly wayward behaviour.

Author's Social Media:   FB Profile

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