UNDERSTANDING IT FOR THE VICTIM FAMILY AND FRIENDS
Erik Erikson the behavioural scientist listed various stages of normal
development and postulated their outcomes and effects on adult life.
He poses four basic ego strengths as the necessary components of a
healthy childhood: HOPE, WILLPOWER, PURPOSE and
HOPE is the product of the infant's coming to feel a greater sense of
trust than of mistrust in his caretakers.
WILLPOWER results from the struggle of the infant to separate
from the Mother's bond and gain a greater sense of autonomy than of
shame and doubt.
PURPOSE accrues when the pre-schooler's sense of initiative is
stronger than his sense of guilt.
COMPETENCE is achieved when the school aged child develops a
greater sense of industry than of inferiority.
If we successfully navigate all these childhood stages we begin to
cultivate our own healthy attitude and responses to life's situations but
if our learning during one of these stages is impeded, then the
responses we develop to compensate for it will affect our personality
and attitudes, possibly for the rest of our life. Our journey under such
circumstances therefore will not be as comfortable as we would like.
Our PERSONALITY is created by ourselves during the course of our
childhood in response to meeting the criteria of these developmental
stages. If we have a poor personality or a personality defect or no
personality at all, we cannot blame any other person for it but
ourselves, it is the result of how we adapted to the stresses of life and
how we continue to adapt to this stress.
Any crisis during any of the early stages of development whether it be
due to poor tuition, ill health, traumatic situations or any other cause,
will affect our responses, not only to the situation but to LIFE in
general. Our personality will also bear the imprint of the hardship.