quickly meets its maker on the battlefield, leaving them with only the
former form of placation."
"I don‘t kill people."
"You kill your relationships when they impinge on your secrets." She
motioned the redundant point aside. "Peaceful societies have thrown
America away as a true friend, because they fear what they‘ve become.
There can be no real trust, because peaceful societies know there is no
courage involved in killing anything. Living properly requires it b y the
bucket load." She raised her brow.
"I get that much, but…"
"But your reasoning is standing in the way of applying it to your own
life." She shifted in her seat. "My point is that you've seen the
consequence of cultural conformation through the suppre ssion of
individuality in some cultures, and the surreptitious directing of beliefs in
others, so that people fit in. Both are stereotypical..."
"Lost me," I interrupted. "Directing of beliefs?"
"Trucks, clothing, guns, and attitudes varied only to the extent that
males were named after their grandfathers, who were named after Civil
War Generals or Apostles. One dog in each household was named Blue,
because that was what a good hound sounded like when he was on the
hunt. Even a tree was a common cultural re ference point, and they all went
to church to display their commitment to conformation. Take everything I
said about America, substitute the word religion for patriotism, and you‘ve
got a third match."
"Just under different levels of pressure?"
"Not by much," she said, sipping her wine. Setting the glass aside,
she said, "The principle applies to all nations: The symbols might change,
but like the people you experienced in Iran and Arkansas all of us are
shaped to accept, and be accepted, in our particular cultural circumstance.
This makes it difficult to see that we are all brothers and sisters on the
same journey, because our interpretation of self is embedded in our
perceptions."
"Makes sense."
"Your fears differed only in that they were more obviously earned,
and then buried as a way to cope with the unmanly sense of helplessness
you experienced in more circumstances than you‘ve revealed to me. They
created deep feelings of self-loathing and unworthiness, which you can‘t
see because the places you feel safest don‘t remotely resemble where you
earned your fear."
