CHAPTER 18: THE BOSS AND THE SOB
In early 1975, my fourth year of managing the outdoor division, my
mother sent me an article in the Wall Street Journal entitled, you hAve
proBLeMs? Consider the pLight oF the nAtion’s soBs.10 The outdoor
division was looking much better, the inventory had improved, and we had
made some productive acquisitions. We had a stable workforce, competent
management in the field, a good working relationship with all of the
employees and a growing national business, accounting for 80 percent or
more of our billing. But my father was still picking at every detail, finding
fault without recognizing accomplishments, ignoring what the plant was
like in the past while criticizing the present, and offering no hope for a
better future.
The article, by staff reporter Everett Groseclose, was dated March 20,
1975, and helped me realize what was going on was really not unusual. A
lot of SOBs (Sons of Bosses) were, like me, between a rock and a hard
place.
The subhead flagged how wretched their lives could be, and provided
insight on this “hypersensitive, emotion-filled world of conflicting wills,
bruised egos and rivalries.”
Groseclose pointed out that “most men that run their own firms are
intensely competitive entrepreneurs as opposed to professional managers
who can run any number of companies without becoming emotionally
involved.” I’m not making the call that any particular finding applied to
me, but Harry Levinson, a psychologist who has studied father-son
relationships in family-held firms, said, “For the entrepreneur, the business
comes to define his position in life, thus when a son comes into the firm an
entrepreneur may view his offspring as a threat, a potential embarrassment
or merely someone to be tolerated to keep peace in the family. Only rarely
is a son welcomed and given free-rein.”
The Wall Street Journal article pointed out that in 1969 an organization
known as Sons of Bosses International was founded with chapters in
twelve states. The group was made up of young men who had either taken
control of the family business or were in line to get the job. I knew I was
not in line to take over the family business, having been hired to run one
of its divisions, so I didn’t seek out membership in this group. The core of
the organization is the father-son relationship. As Groseclose said, “There
is still a lot of mourning because, to hear SOBs tell it, the life of an SOB is
anything but easy.”
Groseclose went on to say, “Most SOBs agree that once they have
decided to go into the family business, the most difficult problem revolves
around how much authority, if any, the father is willing to yield. In many
cases where the answer is none, a parting of the ways is sometimes
inevitable. SOBs note, however, that it is usually the son who departs.”
