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Pretty Boy


Forgive me for speaking about Tree Town in the past tense.
I fled the town roughly a year ago. I’ll fill you in later in
the book about what caused me to flee my beloved hometown.
Maple syrup is incredibly delicious. During my stray cat
days my buddies and I would claw and bite our way through bark,
sometimes really tough bark, to get to that incredibly sweet,
thick, and tasty thing they call maple syrup.
Tree Town contained roughly 15000 human folk the rest
consisted of companion animals and strays. The vast majority of
non-humans consisted of dogs, cats and pigeons. Wildlife such as
squirrels, raccoons, skunks, and gulls had become a minority to
the stray cat and dog population.
Let me backtrack for just a moment. Regarding wildlife
population, I’m not including the other birds (non-pigeons, non-
gulls). Naturally, their numbers can reach into the bazillions.
That’s really incredible stuff.
It was roughly a year ago that the entire Tree Town City
Council, including Mayor Gordon had had enough of the
skyrocketing stray dog and cat population.
By then, the stray dog and cat population had reached
roughly 25000.
I understood what was going on. The human inhabitants of
Tree Town felt threatened by us animals. Humans can’t accept the
fact that some animal species can exceed their own numbers.
Within a few weeks Tree Town was literally buzzing with
animal control officers (ACOs). We had foreigners within these
‘cleanup crews’ too. These fellows and gals posed as Canadian
personnel, but I could tell by their accents they were
foreigners. Some were American, others were British. A few had
really strange accents, too foreign for me to decode.
The ACOs tried to annihilate us. I still don’t believe the
unfounded reasons the mayor and the city council members gave
for the annihilation of ‘unwanted’ inhabitants of Tree Town; too
much animal poop everywhere, dogs and cats attacking innocent
humans, too much howling, barking, yelping, hissing and meowing
throughout the day and especially at night, and too many animal
fights, and worst of all too many mountings occurring in public.
After the annihilation campaign our respective populations
began to dwindle quite rapidly. There was no place to go because
the Tree Town Police Department had officers stationed at every
town exit round-the-clock. These officers were the cream of the
crop, provided with night vision goggles and scoped rifles.
Many of our comrades were gunned down others were wounded
thereby dying a slow death. Hardly a cat or a dog escaped town.
Many, like me were captured.
I was one of the last animals captured. It was on a cloudy
Sunday morning near the back entrance of John’s Burger Joint.
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