Chapter 1
“Oh no!” groaned Nick, looking at his Monday morning timetable. “We’ve got double Hippobottomus first thing!”
“What?” whined Bill. “You sure?”
“Yep,” said Nick, pointing to the slip of card they had been given at the start of term.
Mr. Hipobaum was the Year Five Geography teacher at the St. Thomas School in Kent. He had small beady eyes, buck-teeth and looked rather like a hippopotamus, hence his rather unfortunate nickname.
“Don’t you think he’s been acting a little strangely lately, like he’s about to erupt or something?” Nick asked.
“Volcanic, definitely,” agreed Bill as they made their inevitable way to the worst possible start to anyone’s week of school.
William J. Pennysworth, or just plain Bill, was Nick Taylor’s best friend. They had grown up together and were once next door neighbours. Bill’s father was the county crossword champion and had made him sleep with a dictionary under his pillow as a baby. This was an effort to make his son as brilliant with words as he was. Bill insists it didn’t work but even aged just nine, he was already an expert in words ending with nic. He used them at every available opportunity, usually just to annoy Nick.
It was their ambition to become private investigators when they grew up, and they were going to call it The Taylor Pennysworth Detective Agency. The two of them could no more resist a mystery than miss dinner or an episode of Columbo.
As they walked into the classroom, Mr. Hipobaum was frantically rubbing the blackboard clean. His pudgy little fingers were a blur as the duster sent clouds of chalk billowing above his head. The class filed in slowly, none of them seemed particularly happy to be there.
“Right, sit down class.” Mr. Hipobaum said quickly. “Open your books and revise for your end-of-term test.” Which was a strange thing to say, since it was only October. Mr. Hipobaum returned to his desk and picked up a rather heavy looking book, completely forgetting that he was in the middle of cleaning the blackboard. Quite happy to be ignored by their teacher, the children got out comics and reading books and chatted amongst themselves. Nick threw Bill a puzzled look as if to say What’s up with him? Nick just shrugged his shoulders and sat down.
After a while, Nick, who had been watching the teacher very carefully, turned to Bill.
“I don’t like this,” he said in a whisper.
“Don’t be so moronic, what’s not to like? ” said Bill. “If it goes on like this, we’ve got a double free period first thing every Monday!”
“It’s too good to be true,” said Nick. “Something strange is going on.”
“You are such a cynic!” said Bill with a deep sigh. Nick couldn’t help but smile. Even though it was sometimes annoying, Bill really was amazing with his nic words.
When the lesson finally ended, the pupils streamed out of the classroom. Mr. Hipobaum hardly noticed any of them leave. Nick waited until everyone else had left before he tiptoed up to the teacher’s desk, determined to get a peek at what he was up to. Mr. Hipobaum was flicking furiously through what turned out to be an encyclopaedia, unaware that one of his pupils was standing only a few feet away.
“Ahem!” coughed Nick loudly.
Mr. Hipobaum got such a fright that it made him slam his nose in the massive book.
“Yowch!” he squealed, dropping the book onto his desk. A bookmark with the words ‘Operation Nibiru—Planet X’ scrawled across it, fluttered to the floor. Nick peered at it curiously but Mr. Hipobaum snatched it up before Nick could read any more.
“Get out of here, you nosy little menace!” shouted Mr. Hipobaum.
“What’s Planet X, sir?” asked Nick politely.
“None of your business, boy!” came the curt reply.
“But sir,” insisted Nick.
“Get out before I report you to Captain … er Mr. Vini … I mean Mr. Winiger!” thundered Mr. Hipobaum, stamping his foot. Nick hurried out of the door and ran after his classmates who were on their way to the next lesson.
Nick caught up to Bill and told him about the encounter. He had his best friend’s full attention now.
“Planet X, how intriguing!” exclaimed Bill.
“Very,” said Nick, his eyes wide with excited curiosity.
“I guess we’ll have to keep a close eye on him then,” said Bill.
And that is exactly what they did.