SCENE I. -- A ROOM IN DELIRO'S HOUSE.
ENTER FUNGOSO, FALLACE FOLLOWING HIM.
FAL. Why are you so melancholy, brother?
FUNG. I am not melancholy, I thank you, sister.
FAL. Why are you not merry then? there are but two of us in all the world, and if
we should not be comforts one to another, God help us!
FUNG. Faith, I cannot tell, sister; but if a man had any true melancholy in him, it
would make him melancholy to see his yeomanly father cut his neighbours'
throats, to make his son a gentleman; and yet, when he has cut them, he will see
his son's throat cut too, ere he make him a true gentleman indeed, before death
cut his own throat. I must be the first head of our house, and yet he will not give
me the head till I be made so. Is any man termed a gentleman, that is not always
in the fashion? I would know but that.
FAL. If you be melancholy for that, brother, I think I have as much cause to be
melancholy as any one: for I'll be sworn, I live as little in the fashion as any
woman in London. By the faith of a gentlewoman, beast that I am to say it! I
have not one friend in the world besides my husband. When saw you master
Fastidious Brisk, brother?
FUNG. But a while since, sister, I think: I know not well in truth. By this hand I
could fight with all my heart, methinks.
FAL. Nay, good brother, be not resolute.
FUNG. I sent him a letter, and he writes me no answer neither.
FAL. Oh, sweet Fastidious Brisk! O fine courtier! thou are he makest me sigh,
and say, how blessed is that woman that hath a courtier to her husband, and how
miserable a dame she is, that hath neither husband, nor friend in the court! O
sweet Fastidious! O fine courtier! How comely he bows him in his court'sy! how
full he hits a woman between the lips when he kisses! how upright he sits at the
table! how daintily he carves! how sweetly he talks, and tells news of this lord
and of that lady! how cleanly he wipes his spoon at every spoonful of any
whitemeat he eats! and what a neat case of pick-tooths he carries about him
still! O sweet Fastidious! O fine courtier!
