See birdie Num Num,
sitting in her cage,
singing for her supper,
she's really 'all the rage'
See pussy Sneaky,
such a nasty cat,
stalking birdie Num Num,
he eats her - just like that
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Old Lady Clutter - an outrageous nutter,
squirreled her papers away.
She filed them, and stored them,
piled them and pawed them,
and read them all over each day.
Her neighbour Sir Fred - not quite right in the head,
paid her a visit last May.
He pyred them, and cussed them,
fired and combust them;
then threw all the ashes away.
The lesson to learn - is that if you don't burn,
and get rid of that stuff, no delay.
They'll get you, and fine you,
upset and malign you.
So 'cycle that stuff, right away.
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Just A Pee
I went to the doctors this morning,
to tell him about my bad back.
He said, "Get up there,
right up on the chair."
Well, I tried to, but fell with a crack.
The doctor said, "Have you been drinking?
'Cause 'I won't treat a patient like that."
I told the doc, "No!"
Said, "I really must go,"
as I struggled my way off of his mat.
The doctor then typed on his keyboard,
fingers flying - tap, tappity, tap.
Held a vial out to me.
Said, "Go take a pee.
Fill it right to the top, leave no gap."