Of Some Domestic Quarrels, And The Consequence Thereof
An ingenious magazine-writer, who lived in the time of Mr. Brock and the Duke of
Marlborough, compared the latter gentleman's conduct in battle, when he
"In peaceful thought the field of death surveyed,
To fainting squadrons lent the timely aid;
Inspired repulsed battalions to engage,
And taught the doubtful battle where to rage"--
Mr. Joseph Addison, I say, compared the Duke of Marlborough to an angel, who is sent
by Divine command to chastise a guilty people--
"And pleased his Master's orders to perform,
Rides on the whirlwind, and directs the storm."
The first four of these novel lines touch off the Duke's disposition and genius to a tittle.
He had a love for such scenes of strife: in the midst of them his spirit rose calm and
supreme, soaring (like an angel or not, but anyway the compliment is a very pretty one)
on the battle-clouds majestic, and causing to ebb or to flow the mighty tide of war.
But as this famous simile might apply with equal propriety--to a bad angel as to a good
one, it may in like manner be employed to illustrate small quarrels as well as great--a
little family squabble, in which two or three people are engaged, as well as a vast
national dispute, argued on each side by the roaring throats of five hundred angry
cannon. The poet means, in fact, that the Duke of Marlborough had an immense genius
for mischief.
Our friend Brock, or Wood (whose actions we love to illustrate by the very handsomest
similes), possessed this genius in common with his Grace; and was never so happy, or
seen to so much advantage, as when he was employed in setting people by the ears.
His spirits, usually dull, then rose into the utmost gaiety and good-humour. When the
doubtful battle flagged, he by his art would instantly restore it. When, for instance, Tom's
repulsed battalions of rhetoric fled from his mamma's fire, a few words of apt sneer or
encouragement on Wood's part would bring the fight round again; or when Mr. Hayes's
fainting squadrons of abuse broke upon the stubborn squares of Tom's bristling
obstinacy, it was Wood's delight to rally the former, and bring him once more to the
charge. A great share had this man in making those bad people worse. Many fierce
words and bad passions, many falsehoods and knaveries on Tom's part, much
bitterness, scorn, and jealousy on the part of Hayes and Catherine, might be attributed
to this hoary old tempter, whose joy and occupation it was to raise and direct the
domestic storms and whirlwinds of the family of which he was a member. And do not let
