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Amock Comedy Magazine 5

T-SHIRT TRY-OUTS
We at Amock are big fans of funny t-shirt slogans. So, here are some ideas for you to print out and iron onto
your shirts. All are guaranteed fat-free.
667, THE NEIGHBOUR OF THE BEAST
IF A THING IS WORTH DOING, IT WOULD HAVE
BEEN DONE ALREADY
7/3rds OF ALL PEOPLE DON'T UNDERSTAND
IT'S HARD TO MAKE A COMEBACK WHEN YOU
HAVEN'T BEEN ANYWHERE
FRACTIONS
SCHIZOPHRENIA MEANS NEVER HAVING TO BE
I'D KILL FOR A NOBEL PEACE PRIZE
ALONE
I CAN CURE CHASTITY
ALL TRUE WISDOM IS FOUND ON T-SHIRTS
ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE IS NO MATCH FOR
NATURAL STUPIDITY
I DON'T HAVE A SOLUTION, BUT I DO ADMIRE THE
PROBLEM
THERE'S NO FUTURE IN TIME TRAVEL
LORD, IF I CAN'T BE SKINNY. LET ALL MY
FRIENDS BE FAT
CONSCIOUSNESS, THAT ANNOYING TIME
BETWEEN NAPS
SOMETIMES TOO MUCH DRINK JUST ISN'T
ENOUGH
GIVE ME AMBIGUITY, OR GIVE ME SOMETHING
ELSE
BE PROUD OF BEING MODEST
THE SOONER YOU FALL BEHIND, THE MORE
TIME YOU HAVE TO CATCH UP
NEVER PLAY STRIP POKER WITH A NUDIST
OKAY, SO WHAT'S THE SPEED OF DARK?
KARAOKE IS JAPANESE FOR TONE-DEAF
24 HOURS IN A DAY, 24 BEERS IN A CASE.
COINCIDENCE?
ON THE OTHER HAND, YOU HAVE DIFFERENT
FINGERS
QUANTUM MECHANICS, THE DREAMS STUFF IS
MADE OF.
A DAY WITHOUT SUNSHINE IS CALLED NIGHT
THERE ARE 3 KINDS OF PEOPLE. THOSE THAT
CAN COUNT, AND THOSE THAT CAN'T
DRINK TILL SHE'S CUTE, BUT STOP BEFORE THE
WEDDING
CLONES ARE PEOPLE TWO
I'M NOT CHEAP, BUT I AM ON SPECIAL OFFER
THIS WEEK
RAISE MY HAND IF YOU BELIEVE IN TELEKINESIS
I BET YOU I COULD STOP GAMBLING
IF YOU THINK NOBODY CARES, TRY NOT PAYING
FOR YOUR BEER
THE BEST CONTRACEPTIVE FOR OLD PEOPLE IS
NUDITY
CHANGE IS INEVITABLE APART FROM VENDING
MACHINES)
I'VE BEEN ON SO MANY BLIND DATES I SHOULD
GET A FREE DOG
NO ONE LISTENS, UNTIL YOU MAKE A MISTAKE
NEVER GO TO BED ANGRY. STAY AWAKE AND
PLOT YOUR REVENGE
IF AT FIRST YOU DON'T SUCCEED, DESTROY ALL
EVIDENCE
IF AT FIRST YOU DON'T SUCCEED, GO IN GOAL
HERE I AM, WHAT ARE YOUR OTHER TWO
WISHES?
SACRED COWS MAKE THE BEST BURGERS
EVERYTHING WAS ONCE STATE-OF-THE-ART
FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS, EXCEPT FOR THE ONE
WHERE YOU'RE NAKED AT WORK
HARD WORK NEVER KILLED ANYBODY, BUT WHY
CHANCE IT?
A FOOL AND HIS MONEY CAN THROW ONE HELL
OF A PARTY
 
 
 
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