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Amock Comedy Magazine 5

The gang were ecstatic as they hadn’t eaten in days because someone had shot their cook fourteen times in an
‘accident’.
Kid Curry and Hannibal Hays served the gang themselves and the gang were mightily impressed by the waiting
skills of the man renowned as the fastest draw in the west.
“Enjoy that, boys?” he asked them as they polished of the last of their chapattis.
“Best vittles since my maw cooked the dog,” replied their leader, the one-eyed Two Gun Tucker.
“’Course, the thing is,” the Kid emphasised, “that if any no good varmints was to steal these gentlemen’s spices
they wouldn’t be able to cook grub like that, and that would be a tragedy, wouldn’t it?”
The penny dropped slowly with Tucker. He rose to his feet and said to the gang, “Mount up, boys, seems like
this wasn’t such a good plan.”
“But I want my pudding,” one of the gang complained.
Kid Curry’s hand dropped casually to his holster. “I would recommend that you head for the Little Big Horn then
and order cake and Custer.
Schoolboy humour is regarded as being smutty and scatological. It normally consists of
old jokes handed down through the generations, but we don’t mind digging out a few old
classics.
Doctor Doctor I swallowed a bone.
THUNDERBIRDS ARE GO!
Are you choking?
Lady Penelope called her butler, Parker, into the
bedroom.
No, I really did!
“Remove my dress, Parker,” she ordered.
Doctor, Doctor my son has swallowed my pen, what
should I do?
“Yes, m’lady,” the retainer replied and did as he was
bid.
Use a pencil ‘till I get there
“Now remove my bra,” his mistress commanded,
which he again obeyed.
Doctor, Doctor I've got wind! Can you give me
something?
“Now my stockings.” And when he had done that.
“And now my panties.”
Once he’d done everything she ordered, Lady
Penelope sat back on the bed and said, “Now, Parker,
don’t let me ever catch you wearing them again.”
Yes - here's a kite!
GIDDYUP!
A cowboy from Montana and a cowboy from California
are on a sheep drive. They have been out for weeks
and have been pulling sheep out of the mud and
working really hard. Eventually they come across a
sheep with her head stuck in the fence. They are both very lonely, so the cowboy from Montana says "I'm first!"
and he drops his pants and mounts the sheep. When he is finished, he steps back, looks at the California cowboy,
and says "You're next". The California cowboy shrugs, drops his pants and sticks his head in the fence.
Stick your foot out and trip it up!
Doctor, how do I stop my nose from running?
 
 
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