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Amock Comedy Magazine 4

A COMEDY SOAP OPERA
BARMAIDS
CAST OF CHARACTERS
BIG JOE DONNA NORMA ANNABELLE SUSAN RITA TOMMY
On the night of the Fancy Dress Party the girls had really made an effort and the Ardent Hedonist was
bedecked with balloons and banners. The public had responded well with the bar full of nuns, vicars, red
Indians and SS majors. At one point two older men in naval uniforms arrived.
“Are you sure this is the right place?” the Admiral asked.
“Oh yes, certainly,” the Captain replied, adding “Young Tommy always used to hang about with a very
colourful crowd,” by way of explanation.
They struggled their way through the throng and found an empty table. Susan, in a nurse’s uniform
approached them. “You’ve certainly made an effort, guys. What’ll it be?”
“Two large dark rums, please,” the Captain ordered.
“Good on you. Stay in character,” the saucy young wench replied.
“And we’ll be having something to eat, methinks,” the Captain added.
“I’ll get you a menu, but there’s a free buffet later if you can wait.”
“Free buffet? Jolly decent. We’ll just hang on for that then.”
And as Susan returned to the bar the Captain turned to the Admiral and said. “Bound to be quiche in Tommy’s
buffet.” He stood up. “Have to go the heads I’m afraid.”
Donna had opted for a nun’s habit and was playing with her prayer beads when her boss came up. “ So,
how’s it going?” Joe asked.
“Not bad. The Apaches are out-drinking the construction workers, but they’re not a patch on the highway
cops.”
Tommy came through from the kitchen. “What time do you want me to serve the buffet?”
“Not till the cash register hits the magic number,” Joe answered.
“So, what’s the magic number?”
“Ah, that would be telling,” the landlord replied mysteriously.
The Captain returned from the toilet to find his Admiral dancing with an Indian brave.
“Admiral! What are you doing?”
“Never danced with a redskin before,” his superior explained. “Thought I’d take the opportunity as the chap
asked.”
 
 
 
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