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Amock Comedy Magazine 2

The officer in charge of the Light Brigade
during their disastrous charge was Major
Disaster.
Business Class in Virgin Airlines entitles you to
an in-flight back rub from Richard Branson.
Extracted from The Complete Book of Lies by
Professor Ed Spurious.
G-strings and thongs were originally called
Nose hair longer than 3mm is illegal in
backless panties.
Baluchistan.
Sylvester Stallone has very attractive feet.
The President of Iran, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad,
enjoys rapping.
You cannot play the Canadian national anthem
on bongo drums.
Vodka Martinis (as drunk by James Bond) are
non-alcoholic.
Sting’s real name is Gordon Wasp.
The tissues used to wipe up sexual emissions
Lava lamps were invented by Mahatma Gandhi.
use up 300 million acres of trees annually.
Not taking advantage of a woman if she is
You cannot bake in zero gravity.
insensible with alcohol is regarded as unmanly
in Chile.
Flora is the most common name for prostitutes
in Paris.
The astronauts on Apollo 12 left a toaster on
the moon.
Hopping on the left foot is considered indecent
in Kenya.
Eating too many pears will turn your urine
purple.
Marigolds are thought to be the work of the
devil in parts of Bhutan.
Margaret Thatcher once posed topless for The
Sun.
Princess Di was killed by a crashing UFO.
Sherlock Holmes wore a wig.
Margarine can be used to power a hovercraft.
Tarzan enjoyed Chinese food.
Taking up smoking after you turn 90 doesn’t
damage your health.
Greco-Roman wrestling is only authentic if it
involves a Greek fighting a Roman.
Farting before Prince Charles can get you 10
years in the Tower of London. Especially if it’s
Golfer Ted Fish has his tees made to match his
his turn.
wife’s nipples.
A fully-trained ninja can kill a gorilla with his
Designers are paid more than software
engineers by Apple.
ear-lobe.
Sarah Jessica Parker doesn’t own a horse.
Rattlesnakes cannot whistle.
Duck burgers are the national dish of Ceylon.
 
 
 
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