Ask yourself once more whether you are not taking a measure which may pain
her more than mere silence.
"There is no need for our seeing each other again now. We shall meet with better
feelings some months hence.
"Perhaps he's i' th' right on 't not to see me," thought Adam. "It's no use meeting
to say more hard words, and it's no use meeting to shake hands and say we're
friends again. We're not friends, an' it's better not to pretend it. I know
forgiveness is a man's duty, but, to my thinking, that can only mean as you're to
give up all thoughts o' taking revenge: it can never mean as you're t' have your
old feelings back again, for that's not possible. He's not the same man to me, and
I can't feel the same towards him. God help me! I don't know whether I feel the
same towards anybody: I seem as if I'd been measuring my work from a false
line, and had got it all to measure over again."
But the question about delivering the letter to Hetty soon absorbed Adam's
thoughts. Arthur had procured some relief to himself by throwing the decision on
Adam with a warning; and Adam, who was not given to hesitation, hesitated
here. He determined to feel his way--to ascertain as well as he could what was
Hetty's state of mind before he decided on delivering the letter.