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A Double Dose of Driving Dogs

“Not good enough!” grumbled Boo. “And it sounds all wrong. It goes Tickety
tickety tickety.”
“Hmph!” said Tickety. “I suppose you think it should go BOO.”
“Yep. BOO, and GROWL and RARH like a mad dog,” said Boo.
Silverside growled, deep in his throat.
“Like that!” said Boo. “That sounds much better. Keep it up!”
Silverside kept growling. It was a good, throaty growl. But it did not make the
lawnmower go any faster.
“Go go GO!” shouted Boo, jumping up and down in exasperation.
“Did you say sixteen horse power?” snorted Kimi. “More like hamster power.
Little fat hamster power, about as fast as a slug.” Boo bit her on the tail.
“Stop that!” scolded Tickety.
“That snake has no manners!” squeaked Boo.
“Squabbling won’t help the lawnmower go any faster,” Tickety said. “What we
need is a way to soup it up.”
“Soup it up?” Horace pulled over and stopped. “How do we do that?”
“Bungee ropes!” squealed Boo.
“Bigger wheels,” suggested Silverside.
“We could paint lightning flashes on it,” offered Ragbag.
“And add tail fins,” said Tickety.
“Will they make it go faster?” Horace asked.
There was a strange sound down in the grass box. K imi was laughing.
“What’s so funny?” Boo demanded.
I’ll tell you what you need to do,” replied the snake. “Dismantle the engine, bore
out the cylinder, and install larger piston rings. Then remove the camshaft and modify
the lobes, and finally adjust the main jet of the carburettor to increase the fuel flow.”
“Hang on! Say it more slowly,” Horace begged. “I have to whatsit the
“Oh, and you’ll need to do it in a machine shop with the proper tools,” said Kimi.
“Unless you want to ruin the engine.”
The dogs looked at each other. Their ears drooped.
“Maybe we’ll stick with the tail fins,” Horace said.
“And lightning flashes must make it go a bit faster, mustn’t they?” said Ragbag.
“If I keep growling, that should help too,” added Silverside.